Anna, a 22-year old Indonesian university student,

submitted this question to ASK SHINHWA:

I broke up with my boyfriend last year.  We were in relationship for 3 years. 

To be honest, I didn't like him when he first asked me out.  But since I was a nice girl, I granted his wish.  We were a couple not long after that. 

Then after more than two years in the relationship, I realize I had fallen in love with him (stupid me).  In those last few months of our relationship, I REALLY LOVED HIM.  I thought it was the best moment in my life. 

But just when I was so high and in love with him, he decided to break up with me.  I was broken-hearted for months!  I cursed at him for weeks, and I cried for days. 

I can't open my heart to someone new because the pain he left is still there. 

Dear lovely Shinhwa, what should I do?

I want my life back. Thanks in advance. :D

Hey, you idiot!  Who told you to accept a date with him if you didn't like him?  You were just being nice?  Oh, come on!  You girls are always like that!  Leading men on and not caring for our feelings.  Criticizing our muscles... or the lack of it.  Well, look who's got muscles now!  You're just like my old fans who hated me because I built up my body before.  But now that they are older, they appreciate my muscles.  Now they keep nagging us about a second photobook and pressuring us to show our "front look".  Always asking us to strip at concerts... Yah!  You guys should show us yours before we show you ours again.

Now where was I?  Oh, yeah... if you don't like a guy, there's no such thing as being nice.  You'll only hurt him if you do that.  Now look what happened?  It ended up that you're the one who got hurt. 

When entering into relationships, you have to be honest at the outset.  Don't go on "pity dates".  

If you're worried you might be viewed as a "mean girl," why don't you say this: "I really appreciate your invitation but I have to decline.  Thank you." 

If the guy insists, you say: "I'm sorry but I'm just not interested.  Thanks anyway." 

If the guy still doesn't get it, say: "I just bought a new chef's knife for my kitchen -- an 8-inch sharp, shiny stainless steel blade -- do you want to talk to it instead?"

Whoa!  W