Sounds of raindrops falling on the window pane echoed the whole room as she placed a hand on the cold, clear surface, eyes locked on the droplets of water racing down on its own free will. The skies were dark and grey, just like the condition of her heart. As much as she didn’t want to, memories with him flooded into her mind as if they had a mind of its own and no matter how hard she tries to stop it – it never stops. It just keeps on coming like a typhoon – it was rather dangerous.

A soft, sad sigh left her lips as she let her hand fall onto her lap, where was the boy she truly loved?

Where was he… when she needed him the most?

“Do you think… we’ll last forever?” He asked her carefully, her hair with her head on his chest. She sighed softly along with closing her eyes as she didn’t want to think about it. It felt like she was going to be put under a horrible curse or a terrible nightmare, who would want either of that?

How will she ever cope with him gone?

How can she find the heart to smile without him by her side?

“Can’t… you stay?” She asked meekly, not being able to raise her voice because she knows she’s being far too selfish with this request.

He let out a soft chuckle, looking down on her as he brushed strands of her hair away from her face just so he could press his lips gently against her forehead. Her eyes shut tight at the feeling of his lips on her skin but fluttered open with her cheeks burning red at the sight of him grinning from ear to ear – the silent teasing of noticing her blushing cheeks.

“As much as I would love to, you know I can’t. My father would kill me.”

“Yeah…” She whispered softly. “He would.”

“Here… Get up.” He mumbled softly, mildly pushing her head away so he could sit up properly and he led her head to rest on his shoulder. Her arms s gingerly around his waist and he hummed softly in content, loving the feeling of her arms around him.

“I’ll be back before you know it.”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes inwardly. “Is a few years quick to you?”

“No. It’ll be long and agonizing, living each day without the only reason for me to smile by my side but I’ll keep smiling knowing at the end of it all, I’ll be coming back to you.”

Now it was her turn to smile. How can she not smile?

Her head lifted up from his shoulder and turned so she could see his side profile perfectly – oh how she would miss this dearly when he’s gone.

“I love you.”

 

“Eunji?” A voice rang inside her ears. She looked over her shoulder to see a very… worried Luhan who gave her a look she knew very well. “Yeah?” She breathed out quietly, turning around to face him as her hand moved away from the window.

“Were you… thinking about him again?”

His words struck into her heart like lightning on a stormy day. As much as she didn’t want to, she smiled to assure him she was feeling alright even though he knew there was definitely something wrong with her.

“How can I not?” She answered with her eyes locked on the photo frame placed hopelessly on the table – why was it still there? Luhan stormed over and slammed the photo frame down, hoping to take her mind off things but even if it was merely impossible – at least he tried.

“He’s coming back soon, Eunji.” Luhan reminded her carefully as he handed her a cup of warm water. “Thanks, Lu.” Eunji smiled at him gratefully as he tucked strands of her hair behind her ear. “Are you listening? I sai-“

“I know.” She breathed out tiredly, taking a sip from her cup and she put it aside when she was done. Luhan took his seat opposite her on the bed as he listened to her talk diligently – it was a common thing to do whenever he was around, which is all the time. “My mother told me.” She clarified further that she had already knew about it way before Luhan did. Confusion struck Luhan inside out, again – how will things turn out when he gets back?

“What are you going to do when he comes back?” Luhan questioned, even though he already knew the answer. Please give me a different answer.

She lifted her chin to smile at him bitterly, “We stick according to plan.”

“Eunji, I don’-“

“You promised.” She cried out desperately, lips pressed together to form a slight frown, eyes filled with hope for her wish to come true. This was the only thing Eunji asked from Luhan and there was no way she could ever let Luhan back out on this. Selfish was never a word to describe Eunji but in this case, she was rather selfish for pulling Luhan down into this. Luhan gulped and sighed, shifting his gaze away from the girl in front of him. “Please…” Eunji’s plead entered his ears and stayed there in his mind, guilt filling his heart if he didn’t grant her only wish she wanted from him.

“A-Alright.” Luhan whispered quietly, shifting his gaze back to Eunji as he held onto her hands warmly. “Alright.” He confirmed it clearer this time, causing a slight twitch on the girl’s lips as she smiled slightly.

“I guess it’s the right time to do this.” She mumbled softly as she entered her bedroom. Luhan stood by the frame of her door and she noticed he wasn’t there beside him. Eunji turned around gingerly to smile at Luhan as she motioned him to come in with one hand. “Come in.”

Luhan let out a faint smile, entering the girl’s bedroom as he closed the door behind him before he faced front only to get dragged by the girl by the hand. She held onto his hand tight, showing him around her room as she was here to do some spring cleaning and of course, Luhan was here to help.

Luhan was rather a close friend of Eunji’s. He was there ever since they could walk up until now. Sure they drifted apart slightly when they reached high school but things fell into place as they caught up with one another when they were in the same college – it was fate to be friends with one another. Luhan of course, knew about Kai – Eunji’s first and only love. He could remember the days Eunji would just smile like an idiot talking about the love of her life as if it was something new and exciting – it was a great sight.

The stories Luhan would hear would warm his heart. Some of you might wonder, does Luhan like Eunji?

He fell for her from the moment they met.

Even though he felt heartbroken knowing he would never have a chance with Eunji, he lived by a quote very well that made him able to be this close with Eunji even though she loves another man.

‘If you love someone, you would want them to be happy even if the one who’s making them happy, isn’t you’

Ever since then, he’s been grateful to Kai. Grateful that there was another person out there in this world who could make Eunji smile like the sun, even if that person wasn’t him – he was still happy. As long as Eunji was happy, he would be happy too.

“Luhan…Why are you recording this?” Eunji asked – confused on what Luhan was doing as he held up the video camera.

“Shh… Just go on with what you were going to do.” Luhan hissed at her and waved a hand at her to make sure he managed to hold the video camera properly without shaking too much.

She scoffed at him and rolled her eyes at him playfully before she placed an empty box on the bed. “Where do I begin?” She asked Luhan curiously, honestly needing an opinion on where she should start spring cleaning first. He sighed as he looked around her room, how could she have the heart to get rid of all the wonderful memories of the items in her room?

How can someone have the heart to get rid of all the items their loved ones gave them?

What’s worse was she’s been keeping this for years – and now she was going to give them back?

Can she actually do it?

“S-Start with the photo frames…” Luhan muttered meekly, afraid that she would be offended or anything like that but she wasn’t. She had also thought of starting with the ones that could hurt her the most and that was – photo frames.

To her, photo frames wasn’t just a piece of object in which you slot photos in.

No, God no.

Photo frames to her were like memory keepers that holds a certain memory. A certain memory that was able to be captured on camera to permanently show what a person was feeling at the moment, what emotions – what expressions. Photo frames… were the only thing she was able to live by while he was gone.

She nodded once with a thumbs up to show to Luhan, and the video camera. “Good idea. I was thinking of that too.”

She paced towards the first photo frame hanging on the wall. It was a simple framed Polaroid of Kai’s blur look as he was holding up a bouquet of red roses, beautiful – she thought. As she took the photo frame off the wall, she turned to look at Luhan with a smile. “I remember this like it was yesterday.”

 

“Where is that girl?” Kai grumbled softly, glancing at his watch every few seconds to make sure he wasn’t too early or anything like that but the truth is, he was beyond early. He had arrived at the park an hour before the designated time – again. He sighed deeply, sitting down on the bench with a heavy heart that he had to wait for the girl he loved.

Kai stared down on the bouquet of roses in his hands. Red and fresh as he inhaled the beautiful scent of the flowers he knew his girlfriend would love.

“Do you think she’ll love you?” He mumbled at the flowers, waiting for a reaction that he mentally reacted.

“Of course not. She loves me.” He cheekily replied, fiddling with the ribbon tied around the stem of the flowers to keep them in place. “Hey boyfriend! Heads up!”

He lifted his head obliviously only to blink his eyes the moment a camera flash blinded his eyes for a second. He blinked a few more times to make sure he could see everything clearly and he could – starting with the beautiful girl before him. “What the heck?” She snickered but she put her Polaroid camera back into her bag before lightly tapping the photo she took in her hands. “Don’t let the sunlight ruin it.” Kai reminded her carefully, holding up the bouquet of flowers to act as an umbrella.

She lifted her chin to see he was holding her favorite flower – roses.

Letting her mind drift off to somewhere else, she eagerly reached for the bouquet of flowers to grin at it as she inhaled the scent of the elegant red roses. “For me?” She squealed silently and the boy simply chuckled, planting a kiss on the crown of her head since he was much taller – “Of course, love.”

“They’re beautiful!”

“Not as beautiful as you,” He took the photo from her and he smirked at the photo before flipping it over to show it to her. “This guy looks mighty fine, don’t you think?”

“Yeah,” she replied dreamily, taking both the photo and gripping onto the bouquet of roses before she turned around to walk away from him. His lips parted as he raised a hand to place it beside his mouth, “Hey! Where are you going?!”

She halted her tracks, spun around and chuckled at him. “Going on a date. I have a hot guy in this photo and a bouquet of roses.”

“But the real guy is right here!” His hand gestured from his head to toe. “You should be dating me! Not the photo!” He exclaimed as he caught up beside her, knowing it was just one of her cheeky jokes – a trait he loved a lot. She was always so unpredictable, so fun, so addictive – his love.

Luhan noticed the way she was staring at the photo and he tried to stop recording her but he couldn’t – he needed this a lot. “I still remember him calling me ‘love’.” She whispered bitterly, pacing back towards the box to place it in there before she came face to face with the wall again. “E-Eunji, maybe I should do it for you.”

He thought it was the wrong thing to say, so he bit his lower lip in guilt. Her head turned to his direction and she gave him a slight smile, “I want to do it on my own, Luhan.”

“But, you’re having such a hard time…”

She shook her head in assurance as she let out a soft sigh. “I want to walk on this memory lane before I reach the end for the last time. It’ll take a while,” She glanced at the wall of photo  frames, “But I want to get through this once and for all before I let it all go, can you stay by me for it, Lu?”

When he saw the determination that flared in her eyes, his head nodded on its own, “You know I’ll be there every step of the way, Eunji.”

“Then let’s continue.” Luhan agreed silently by sitting down on her bed with the video camera in his hands – luckily the battery was full and it should be enough to record the whole thing. “Choose between number one and two, Luhan.” Eunji looked over her shoulder to eye Luhan who widened his eyes slightly, unintentionally letting out a soft ‘Oh?’. Her hands gestured in a way – urging him to choose even though he couldn’t see.

“Uh… One.” He held up one finger with his other hand and she smiled.

Chronological order it is…

Next, she lifted up and brought down another photo frame hanging on the wall with a small smile. This time, it was a picture of the two of them hand in hand during the annual school carnival during their senior year. Her smile was wide as she stared at the photo and it was visible on how tight he was holding her hand on that day. Unknowingly, she looked down on her hand – the feeling of his hand still lingered after all these years.

 

“Hey! Stop running! We’ll have time for all the stalls!” Kai hollered as he chased after his girlfriend who shook her head childishly, “We came late and there’s only two hours!”

He pouted, reaching for her hand as he tugged her back to slow her down. “Babe, I apologized.” Chuckling as she dragged him to the next stall she wanted to go to, she gave a nod while she was at it. “I know! I’m not blaming you at all, Kai.”

“Then slow down,” He tugged her back again as his grip on her hand grew tighter. “We have the whole day together and I don’t want to rush things. Let’s take it slow.”

“But-“

He pecked her lips to silence her as he led her to the stall she was aiming for that would take them two minutes to reach there if they ran but ten minutes if they walked at the pace Kai was going at. “Slow.” He gave a poke on her nose and she sighed, giving up as she contained herself to follow her boyfriend. “Fine…” She grumbled softly but broke out to a smile when Kai let go of her hand all of a sudden. “If I race you there once for the day, will that make you happy?”

Not even giving him a proper answer, she squealed as she ran ahead of him. Blinking once to let it hit him like a ton of bricks, his foot coordination and adrenaline rushed through his veins as he chased after her. “You’re cheating!”

“Am not!” She shouted back and she continued to run with a soft, polite words to ask people to move out of the way as he did the same. When the people walking by saw and heard the two, they easily thought that Kai was chasing after her. “Run faster to get her, Kai!” A few guys chorused as Kai gave a smirk, boosting his confidence as he ran faster the moment he saw the stall a distance from him with his girlfriend ahead. “Got it!”

As she heard this, she gave a light giggle before she stopped all of a sudden when the stall was a few steps away and he bumped into her from the back as he too – stopped running. “You win.” She breathed out, turning around to smile at him tiredly. He wiped her sweat from her forehead to frown at her. “But you reached here first.”

“You gave me a chance.” She saw it through him like glass and he gulped. “W-Well…”

“C’mon! We’re here! I’ll win you a big teddy bear!”

“I’ll win you a big teddy bear.” He retorted, gently pulling her back so he could go ahead of her to get a turn to win her something first. Chuckling behind him, she wrapped her arms around him as he lined up.

 

When the photo frame was in the box, she looked at Luhan and chuckled painfully. “I still have the big teddy bear he won.”

“E-Eunji...”

“It was so big, I had to carry it on my back on the way home!” She exclaimed – clearly hiding the fact this was all emotionally painful for her. “I guess I should give that back too.” She mumbled quietly before she sighed, coming back to the wall to take down another photo frame.

One after another, the big box she had was quarter filled with photo frames and nothing else. It was finally time to move on to the other things he got her. She exhaled heavily as she sat down beside Luhan who was still – recording. “Are you alright?” Concern filled his voice and she turned to look at him with a faint smile. “I can’t believe I did it.” She breathed out in disbelief as she turned her head to look at her wall.

The things that used to filled the space were so beautiful – so memorable but now it was dull and empty.

Unknowingly, hot tears started to fill her eyes as her hand lifted weakly to place it over – she missed him dearly. The damp of her tears that she was protecting tightly broke, allowing the tears to roll down her cheeks faster than she thought she would last without crying. The boy beside her hastily put the video camera on the bedside table, not realizing it was still recording – allowing all of this to be in the video at the right angle despite the way he messily placed it on the table to pull the girl in his embrace.

“Shh…” He hushed her quietly, eventually hugging her tighter when her sobs were evident. He clenched his eyes when her arms found their way around his waist as his shirt began to feel damp. “Let’s do this another day.” Luhan suggested when after a moment, she calmed down in his arms. A weak nod came from her as they remained in that position. “Shh…” He hushed her again, occasionally her head in a calm and gentle pace. “We’ll get through this together.”

“Is this thing recording?” She fumbled with the button of the video camera with a confused look on her face as she bit her lower lip. “Why does he want me to record this in the first place…?” She questioned quietly as she placed the video camera on the table where it had the perfect angle to record her whereabouts in her room as she cleared the things she needed to get rid of. After rubbing her palms together, she let out a sigh with her eyes shut for a moment.

You can do this Eunji, c’mon.

She opened her eyes and she gave herself an assuring pat on the shoulder before she walked forward towards her closet. She opened it and almost instantly, a smile appeared on her face the moment she saw the big teddy bear  he won for her a few years back. Her arms extended as she reached for the stuffed toy, bringing it to her chest as she hugged it tight, mumbling softly, “I’ll definitely bring you when I have to go. I’m not giving you back.”

“What else…?” She tilted her head a little, rummaging through her closet to find the things she should put inside the box that contained the photo frames that was now filled with a few cards, letters, books, accessories that were all given by him. Then it just came down to two things that slipped her mind.

A necklace, and a very, very important ring.

Looking down on her neck, a familiar necklace came to her view.

“Couldn’t sleep?” His voice echoed in her mind as she spun around to see him dressed in a fitting blue v-neck along with a pair of black slacks – how could someone look so good looking just like this? “Y-Yeah.” She stammered, turning back around as she gripped onto the railings of the balcony.

Currently they were camping in school – it was a school event and they participated with their group of friends. Now everyone was asleep except for her and the boy who sneaked up behind her. Lifting her chin to see the beautiful night sky – it was nearing midnight, arms s around her waist and her back was greeted with a warm, sturdy chest.

“It’s time.” He breathed out with his head pressing onto hers from the side.

Her head tilted a little to look at him but she couldn’t exactly see him properly because of how he was pressing his head against hers. “Time for what?”

“In three, two, one…”

“Happy birthday to you,” A chorus of people started singing from the hallway behind them. Kai released his grip around her, backing away as he turned her around and moved to the side only to let her see that the group of friends she came with were walking towards her, out the door, onto the balcony with a cake on her best friend’s hands. Kai’s voice soon merged into the voices of the people singing her the birthday song, it all felt so perfect. Eunji’s hands reached up to cover her face to hide her blushing cheeks as she moved them away the moment the cake was right in front of her with the group of people surrounding her, ending the birthday song with a smooth ending.

“Make a wish, baby.” Kai cooed beside her as she held her hands up in front of her chest – clasped together with a wish in her mind. She wanted Kai to be happy for the rest of his life - with her, if possible. Bottom line is, she just wants him to be happy, even though it was her birthday wish.

Soon, she lowered down with a soft blow, all the candles were extinguished.

Roughly after ten minutes of cutting the cake on the ground by the balcony along with paper plates and forks, the little cake eating event was successfully carried out and she nearly burst into tears – all thanks to Kai. This was the whole point of forcing her to come for this school event – firstly it was because he wanted to have a different way to approach her in celebrating her birthday and she wasn’t going to lie, this was a good start.

“Now it’s my turn.” Kai whispered into her ears as she hummed a little, turning her head to the right to meet Kai’s eyes who sparkled dearly under the moonlight. “Close your eyes.”

Obediently, her eyes closed on their own, anticipating for what was going to come.

She felt nothing but a pair of lips on hers. The warmth she received not only from his chest pressed onto her back, the arms around her as she was sitting in between his legs on the ground but also the warmth of his subtle lips. A hand reached up to place it on his cheek as she turned her body, giving him a better angle to kiss her passionately.  As he broke the kiss, his eyes opened along with hers, allowing him to receive a sheepish grin from his girlfriend.

“Happy birthday, Park Eunji.” His voice entered her ears and she zealously leaned forward to peck his lips as her hand on his cheek fell. “Thank you.”

“Do you like your present?”

Thinking it was the kiss, she blushed as she turned her body around, pressing her back against his chest, “Would it be weird if I love it?”

Snickering on what he knew she was thinking, his hand simply reached for hers as he guided it to the necklace he swiftly put on around her neck. Causing her eyes to widen in shock.

“I love your kisses so it’s definitely not weird if you love mine too. By the way, I’m talking about this present.”

As she lowered her head down to look clearly at the necklace of a half moon combined with a half sun.

“I’m the sun, and you’re the moon. Two halves coming together as one.”

“Why do you have to be the sun and I have to be the moon?” She questioned cutely, causing him to smile wider as he shook his head. “Tell me!” She whined slightly and he hugged her tighter, resting his chin on the crook of her neck as she snuggled closer towards him.

“Because even though we’re different, as long as we love each other, we’re together as one. You complete me, and I complete you. We’ve come so far to set all our differences aside and that’s how far we’ve come today. I love you, Park Eunji.”

“Kim Jongin, also known as… Kai,” She called him out softly, placing her smaller hands on his masculine arms around her. “Hmm?” He hummed in response as one of her hands lifted up to admire the beautiful necklace she got. “This present is lovely, and I love it so much. But…”

His arms retreated from her waist almost instantly – but? But what?! He took so long on choosing that gift and there was a flaw about it? Even after he explained what it meant? What could possibly be wrong about it?

“But what?” He suddenly panicked, causing her to chuckle softly as she turned around to smile at him warmly, she was truly an angel to him. “I love you more.”

Two of her hands raised up to the back of her neck where she gripped onto the clasp of the necklace. As much as she wanted to just take the necklace off her neck, she couldn’t. The will in her wasn’t strong enough to fully let go of everything – even after all these years of not seeing him. “I’m keeping this.” She mumbled softly, looking down on the necklace around her neck. “I’m keeping this.” She assured herself again as she walked towards the box to close it with the lid. Nodding to herself once in confidence, “I’m ready for this.” With that, she wanted to lift the box up but it was heavy – at least to her. Shaking her head at her own weakness, she sat down on the bed. She would get Luhan to carry this for her. Her eyes travelled up as she noticed the video camera that was recording everything from the moment she entered her room. Gingerly, she got up from the bed and slowly walked towards it, mumbling a soft goodbye before she stopped recording.

Smiling contentedly as he entered his apartment, things were just like the way he left. All his things were in place, the house was well-maintained thanks to his close friend who came here every week to make sure everything was alright. He arrived not long ago and now he was just taking a breather as he sat down on the sofa he hasn’t sat on for four years. Closing his eyes in relief, he couldn’t believe he was back here – finally. All those letters he’s written to her telling her he would come back was a proven fact because here he was, back to where he left her to be alone for four years just so he could pursue his studies.

Getting up on his feet, he paced towards his bag as he began unpacking. He thought he would get tired but he wasn’t – he was energized. The thought of seeing her tomorrow made him feel pumped up and excited, he couldn’t wait.

He smiled warmly as he picked up the photo frame from his luggage only to circle his thumb around the face in the photo. Turning around with his eyes locked onto the photo, he tore his gaze away from it for a moment to hang it up, this was the only photo frame he took with him when he went overseas – the feelings when he took this photo were still fresh in his heart as this was the photo that gave him the strength whenever he thought he couldn’t cope without seeing her, talking to her, listening to her, touching her. At the first year during his leave, they would webcam most of the time, texts were constantly sent to one another along with late night phone calls. Because of this, the two couldn’t really focus on their studies very well due to the lack of sleep.

With this, they came up with the agreement to only send hand-written letters to one another and reply whenever the other can. Shockingly, it turned out very well for the both of them. As he got immersed into the picture of her stunning smile, he couldn’t help but stare at it for a while longer.

He peeked through the window on the classroom door only to see his favorite person sitting there alone in the corner of the room. Everyone else had gone for recess and just as he guessed, she didn’t go again. Twisting the door knob quietly, he slipped in and shut the door behind him gently – trying not to get noticed as he held up his camera in his hands.

She on the other hand, had earphones plugged into her ears – shutting the world from her mind and heart as she fiddled with her pencil on her notebook, trying to find the right words to write down what was on her mind based on the song echoing her ears. She bit her lower lip after letting out a soft sigh, it was really hard finding the suitable words that would rhyme.

With a snap of his camera, he was satisfied with the outcome of it. She looked so calm and collected with her hair tied up as she looked extremely adorable in her school uniform and blazer. Her body posture and the way she held her pencil made everything more perfect than it already was – this photo was definitely a keeper. He put his camera aside, walking closer towards her from the back as he loomed over her to read what she was writing.

He pulled one side of her earphones to whisper, “Try ‘Like a darling’.”

She jerked up and turned around instantly only to let her boyfriend plant a kiss on her lips to make it up for surprising her. “Hey.”

Frowning, she snatched her right earpiece grumpily. “Don’t do that!”

Snickering, he simply lifted her up from her seat and he sat back down only to place her on top of his lap with his arms locked around her waist. He leaned forward to let her use his chest as a comfy pillow and she wasn’t going to lie – this felt nice.

With her eyes wide open, as he took the other side of the earpiece to put it in his ears to listen to the song she was listening to, her head looked over her shoulder to eye him.

“Yes, love?” He noticed her staring as he diverted his attention from out the window, back to her.

“What did you say a moment ago?”

“Hey?” He repeated his greeting and she pouted. Smiling warmly, he answered, “’Darling’.”

Like she’s found a missing puzzle piece, she hurriedly faced her notebook to write down the last word to finish her poem – it was perfect. “Read it to me.” Kai used his chest to push her forward a bit and she gulped, hands holding onto her notebook as she recited her poem.

“Hand in hand,
  We share our warmth on this summer day,
  Like a genie who says, ‘Your wish is my command’,
  I would do anything you say.

  Chest to chest,
  We share our warmth on this winter day,
  Like a lazy guard who needs a rest,
  I know you’ll take care of me.

  Heart to heart,
  We share this same feeling every day,
  Like a darling who loves you so,
  I know we’ll never let go.”

Hugging her tighter after she finished reciting her poem, he rested his chin on the crook of her neck. “I’m never letting go.”

“Shall I get the door?” Luhan asked as there was a knock on it. The two were on her sofa, just carrying on with their nonchalant talks along with a few jokes thrown in here and there. Instead of going out, she’d rather stay in here as long as possible before she had to leave. She nodded once and Luhan gingerly got up, heading towards the door. As he bent down to look through the peephole, he took a double take before his eyes were wide like saucers. Gulping, he turned to look at Eunji with a pale look.

“Who is it?” She mouthed the words and he gulped again – “It’s him.”

“W-What?”  She croaked out in shock, a hand quickly slapped over to make sure she stayed silent. “S-Should I answer it?” Luhan whispered this time and there were knocks on the door again. “But we agreed to meet tomorrow at the park. That will be the last time I’ll be seeing him! What is he doing here?!” She half-whispered, half-shouted as she was well aware that he was right outside the door.

“He’s ruining everything…” She mumbled softly but Luhan came to stand in front of her as he held onto her hands. “Maybe it doesn’t have to end this way. Maybe this is God’s way of telling you that he’s early here now so that you can have a different ending to this love story. Please, Eunji.”

“No.” She breathed out worriedly as she pushed his hands away. “I can’t, Luhan.” She shook her head franticly, she really couldn’t do it. “Believe me, this will be good for him.” She nodded once unsurely followed by a gulp after that. “I’ll go hide and… make him leave, please.”

Luhan bit his lower lip – not sure if he should do it but the moment she said, “This will be the second last thing I’ll ask from you before I-“

He placed a hand over quickly and nodded once, agreeing to grant her wish.

Luhan placed the hand on the door knob to open it, coming face to face with his best friend he’s never seen in forever. “Kai?” Luhan’s head bobbed forward – pretending to be shocked as if he never looked through the peephole. “Kai!” He changed his tone to happy one as he immediately hugged Kai who returned the hug with one hand, a smile plastered on his face like a happy child – he missed Luhan dearly, but he missed her more.

Repelling from one another, he looked over Luhan’s shoulder to peek into her apartment he hasn’t seen in a long while. “Where is she?” Kai asked with hope as Luhan let out a frown. “She’s actually working now.”

“Working?” Kai raised an eyebrow as he pressed his lips together. “That’s odd…”

Luhan swallowed hard but he managed to play it cool. “What’s odd?”

“She told me she stopped working for a while now.”

Instead of panicking, knowing that his promise to Eunji was on the line, Luhan rubbed the back of his neck with a sheepish grin. “Ah, maybe she forgot to tell you that she recently went back to work just for a short period of time due to the lack of  manpower.”

“Ah…” Kai let out disappointedly but then he frowned again when he lifted his chin to look at Luhan with an eyebrow raised. “Why are you here, actually?” Kai asked with a hand pointing at Luhan who grinned again, “My place is being renovated for the time being and it’ll be done in a few days so I’m staying here for the time being. Sleeping on the sofa, if that’s what you’re going to ask next.”

Nodding once understandingly, Kai revealed his other hand holding a bouquet of red roses as he handed them to Luhan. “Could you pass these for her for me? Since, I guess I’ll just see her tomorrow.”

“Sure.” Luhan nodded once and Kai gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Thanks, Lu. It’s good to see you.”

“Is he gone?” She opened her bedroom door only to see Luhan’s back as he was facing the closed front door. “Lu?” She called him out as Luhan turned around only to show her the bouquet of red roses. He walked towards her and handed her the bouquet with a rather sad look on his face. “I really hope you’re doing the right thing, Eunji.”

“Thanks Luhan, you can go now.” She thanked him gratefully with a smile evident on her face. The blonde bent down to level their eyes, “Can you please not do this?”

Not giving him what he wanted, she shook her head.

Luhan stood up straight and sighed. “Then I’ll wait in the car. We’ll have to leave straight after that, alright? You’ve been prolonging this since forever.”

She nodded once with an ‘O.K.’ sign, “Got it.”

This time he shook his head with a frown, “How are you still so happy about this?” She shrugged, earning a final nod from the blonde before he walked away.

“Eunji-ah!” A voice rang into her mind and she remained still on the bench. She fiddled with her fingers nervously – this was really happening. Her head lifted up shyly to see that from a distance, her first love was currently walking towards her with a rose in his hands. Her heart skipped a beat as she tried to calm down – he’s really back. He kept his promise.

I can't keep mine...

The moment he stood in front of her, the sight she was able to see engraved in her mind. He had grown a bit taller than before – even though he was considered as tall way even before he left. He had cut his hair slightly shorter than it was but other than that, everything else was just the way she remembered it to be. His dark brown orbs sparkled brightly under the broad daylight, his plump lips, kissable cheeks, sharp features – everything. After all those sweet words of telling her he’ll be back in the letters, it all came true as he stood before her while she got up clumsily, only to allow him to hold her with his hands on the sides of her waist.

Before he said anything, he let the rose he was holding onto fall to the ground as he looked down on her to let the image of her sink in. Her mesmerizing eyes were at it again – pulling him into a trance that he’s been wanting to be in for so long, her slightly pink lips and cute nose. Everything was just the same except for now, her chubby cheeks were gone and she was skinnier than he remembered but overall, everything was still perfect. Not wasting anymore time, his arms wrapped around her tight, pulling her into his warm embrace as she struggled to not return the hug.

He noticed this and he hastily put her arms around himself in content, thinking that she was just shy with all of this but the truth is, she didn’t want to do it – no, she couldn’t do it.

As he broke away from the hug to start talking to her, or kiss her, her hands placed on his chest to push him away gently, causing him to take a step back away from her as she smiled sadly. Looking up to him, she couldn’t stare into his eyes any longer because she knows she’ll go back on her word if she does. As his head dipped down to plant a kiss on her lips, she turned her head, causing him to stop the moment his lips brushed against her cheek. The urge to just turn her head back to crash their lips together was high, but she held herself back harder than she’s ever did before. C’mon Eunji. The faster you do this, the better.
 

With that, she brushed his hands away from her and took a step back, eyes glued onto the ground as she said, “I met someone else.”
 

Furrowing his eyebrows, his eyes darkened and his voice lowered. “W-What?”
 

As she gulped, he found it odd. She met someone else?
 

Laughing, he shook his head. “You’re playing with me, right?”
 

When silence wrapped around them, things grew serious. Her head lowered even more than it could so that she couldn’t see his face, and indeed it was a good choice not too as the smile on his face was ripped off – replaced with a torn gaze as his lips parted, trying to breathe properly as he looked at her. “You’re serious?” He muttered the words in disbelief and she nodded once. Her hand reached over to place on top of the box of memories she’s collected and that she’s treasured dearly. “And I’m giving this back to you. These are all the things you’ve given to me before and I’m returning them back to you.”

“No no no!” He shouted, gripping onto her shoulders as he shook her vigorously – the amount of anger he had in him, the amount of pain couldn’t be suppressed. He wanted her to just jump at him and kiss him passionately as they talked about how much they missed each other. He wanted her to tell him how her days were while he was gone. Were they dreadful? Were they worse? Were they horrifying without him? Because those were the words to describe how he was on his own without his ray of sunshine by his side. How dare she tell him that she met someone else?
 

“W-What do you mean you met someone else? What do you mean you’re returning this all to me? What are you saying?!”
 

She wanted to just tell him that it was all just a joke and she could playfully laugh at him on how this all tricked him like this but she couldn’t. She couldn’t do that – it would’ve been too selfish of her to do so.
 

“I’m saying I’m getting married.” She lifted her chin boldly to stare into his eyes. The look in her eyes had changed completely – feigned with coldness as she glared at him.
 

“I’m returning all the things you’ve given to me except for three things, a stupid bear, a necklace and a ring – because I lost it, I don’t know where it is so I’m sorry I can’t return that.”
 

Kai’s lips parted even further, knitting his eyebrows in deep confusion as he stared at her.

Stupid bear?

Lost it?

Who is she?

“Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?!” He roared as the barrier holding his tears back in him had broke, his tears fell from his face as he shook her hard, hoping that the girl he’s loved all his life would turn back to the girl he used to know before he left. Where was she?

“She left when you left her. Things got hard and she found someone else who didn’t need to leave her side.”

Her stare pierced right through him like how her words pieced through her heart. He wasn’t only confused – he was hurt, deeply hurt. His grip on her shoulders got tighter as she pried his hands off her shoulder with all the strength she had, even if it hurt her physically and emotionally – she had to get out of here because she can’t stand to see him cry anymore. Seeing him cry is one of the most horrifying things she’s ever seen and she couldn’t believe that she was the cause of it. She had planned for everything to end in a nice way but she had a backup plan just in case it didn’t work.

She had to be the most heartbreaking person yet.

“Don’t come looking for me, because I won’t know you anymore. Be it Kim Jongin, or Kai, I won’t know you. Sorry.” She apologized blankly as if she didn’t mean it, and he bought that. He shook his head, muttering a string of protest but she simply inhale sharply before she gathered she strength in her to turn and walk away from him. Each step she took was so hard for her to take, it felt like rocks were tied around her ankles to weigh her down. She felt like a sinner for doing this but this was the only way she wants to do it – she doesn’t have any other choice.

“Stop walking.” He breathed out painfully, fists clenched as he felt as if his insides were crushed into pieces. He couldn’t think straight, his eyes were getting blurry because of the incoming tears he’d never expect to have and he doesn’t know why he was acting this way but he was certain that he didn’t want her to walk away.

No.

He needed her to not walk away from him.

“I said stop walking!” His voice got louder as he his feet to see her back, getting further and further bit by bit as he took in heavy breaths. He felt as if he forgot how to breathe and the light in his life got dimmer and dimmer as she continued walking without sparing a glance at him – she had to leave as soon as possible before she breaks down in front of him. Growing hopeless on the fact that she was still walking, he was left with no other choice.

“STOP WALKING!” His voice echoed the whole park, causing her to whimper as she finally stopped, pressing her lips together with her eyes clenched shut – a tear managed to roll down her cheek. Her lips quivered as she clasped her hands in front of her tightly – how long will she be able to put up with this?

“I dare you to tell me you don’t love me.”

Why was he making things so hard for me?

“Until I hear you say that with your own voice, I’m not letting you go.”

Keeping her eyes shut, the sudden bravery flushed into her veins as one of her hand lifted up to hold onto the necklace tight. She pressed on the half sun and moon, as if the shape of it was going to be a part of her skin if she kept pressing any tighter but she managed to say in a steady voice, “I don’t love you.”

And with that, she hurriedly walked away, bringing herself somewhere else other than here because if she stayed for a second or two longer, she would’ve broken down here and everything would be ruined. He was left at the park where he first met her and now he’ll remember this place as the place he lost her.

Each day that went by felt useless to him. Ever since that day, he didn’t know how to smile – what was a smile? He would question himself that everyday when he woke up. The image of her would enter his mind and it would be the same as he lived on. Two weeks ever since that day and he made no progress on moving on. Even if he was drunk, hopelessly making his way towards her apartment and knocking on the door like nobody’s business, no one would open the door – not even Luhan. When he called her phone number he managed to get through his other friends, she wouldn’t even pick up. He could only call and listen to the voicemail over and over again – at least he was still able to listen to her voice that way.

It was just the same thing for him again as he woke up hating on the girl who made him so happy but now he felt like living was pure torture without her by his side. He couldn’t even cry anymore, at least, he tried not to. He’s been shedding tears and crying pathetically every single day ever since she left and it didn’t help when every corner of his house he would turn, he would be reminded by her – including the promise ring he wore on his finger.

“For me?” She squeaked, eyes gleaming with joy as he nodded his head. He slipped the ring onto her finger and she opened and closed her hand cheekily, loving the feeling of the ring he had put on her – especially when he was the one who personally ordered this himself. “I love it!” She threw her arms around him for a hug which he gladly returned, “I’m glad you like it.”

“I love it!” She corrected and reminded him as she hugged him tighter.

“Good, because I have the exact same one.”

Pulling away from him almost instantly, her eyes bulged as she hurriedly reached for two of his hands only to grip onto the hand that had a ring on it. “Wah…”She stared at two of their hands in awe. Kai pressed his hand against hers as he laced them together, smiling at her lovingly as she stared at their hands. “It’s beautiful… Kai…”

“You know what’s more beautiful?”

Her eyes blinked rapidly, lifting her chin to look at him. “How can anything be more beautiful than these rings?”

He smiled at her oblivious side, “This.” He whispered as he cupped her chin with his other hand, pressing his lips against hers.

His body trembled as he pulled out the ring from his finger furiously, tossing it across the room before the tears streamed down his face again.

“How are you feeling?” Luhan asked as he entered the room unannounced. “Oh, you’re here.” She smiled as she sat up on the bed with his help as he sat down on the bed beside her. “I’ve been good.”

“Eunji…” Luhan called her out carefully when he knew she wasn’t telling him the truth. Her face didn’t look good at all and he could tell something was off.

“Hey, I came here just like you told me to. I did everything you asked me to. What else do you want, hmm?”

Luhan sighed softly, shaking his head as he lifted his chin to look at her. “How are you so calm about this? Aren’t you worried about how he’s doing one bit?”

“I’m so worried, I could die faster.”

A smack from Luhan landed on her arm and she hissed in pain exaggeratingly – obviously not to Luhan’s consent as his eyes widened in shock. “E-Eunji! I’m sorry! Was it too hard?” He scooted closer worriedly and she snickered, lifting her chin to grin at him playfully. His smile fell and he groaned, “Stop doing that.”

“I told you, I left and I’m not turning back. Everything will be fine… after this.”

“You can’t just sit here an-“

“I can, Luhan. That’s the only thing I can do, remember?”

He frowned at her pitifully, shaking his head as he placed a hand on her cheek. “Please, he doesn’t deserve this.”

“Think about it, Luhan.” She breathed out tiredly, lifting her chin to eye him properly. “What can he do if he knows? Come here all the time? Wasting his time just staying by my side when one day, he’ll know that it’ll all come to a waste knowing he won’t get any benefit from doing this? I did him and me justice by ending things in person. I ended the most precious thing I’ve ever got in my life and I know I should be crying but I’m happy and relieved knowing someone else could fill up the space he’s been keeping for me.”

“But Eunji-“

“I want to die peacefully,” She blurted the truth out of desperation. “It’s not going to be peaceful if I have him crying by my side before I even leave. So please, Luhan. It’s just a few more days.”

One more day left as predicted, and Luhan couldn’t do it anymore. He thought he was stronger than this, more loyal than this to keep  his promise to her but he couldn’t. He had to do this or he would be guilty for the rest of his life even if this has nothing to do with him.

“Sorry, Eunji-ah… I can’t keep your promise.” Luhan breathed out as he raised his hand up to knock on the door. As expected, no one came to open the door and he took the key from under the mat and he unlocked the door swiftly. The moment he welcomed himself in, he found Kai sleeping on the sofa with a photo frame in his hands. There were a few photo frames shattered on the floor and much to his guessing, they were photos of Kai and Eunji together. As he approached the taller sleeping, he narrowed his eyes at the shining material at the corner of the room. Picking up the thing that caught his eye, he grew angry.

Wasting no time, he woke the Kai up.

“What the hell?” Kai cursed, rubbing his eyes as he put the photo frame aside as he sat up groggily, trying to get a better picture of who woke him up – he dreamt of her again and it felt so real, he wanted to sleep forever. “What, Luhan?” He snapped at Luhan who shook his head, lifting the ring he held in his hands up higher for Kai to see. “Why did you throw this? Do you not love her anymore?”

Kai let out a scoff, finally gaining conscious when he heard what Luhan said.

“The news spread fast, didn’t it?”

“Don’t with me, Kai. Why did you throw it?!”

“Why don’t you ask her why she threw my heart away first?!” Kai shouted back as he shot up from the sofa, coming eye to eye with Luhan who was equally pissed. “Keep this ring. Don’t make me regret coming here.”

“Why? Do you pity me?” Kai asked out of nowhere, snatching the ring away from Luhan’s hands to wear it. Kai waved his hand in front of Luhan’s hand tauntingly, “Here, I wore the damn ring. Happy?”

“What is wrong with you?” Luhan’s voice got lower, and more serious as he stared at Kai who let the bitterness take over him. “Why do you pity me so much? Are you the guy she left me for?” Luhan simply gulped as he shifted backwards unintentionally.

Well, I was ‘supposed’ to be. 

Kai’s eyes darkened as he lunged forward to grip Luhan by his collar tightly and aggressively. “Are you?”

Instead of feeling frightened, Luhan’s eyes darkened just as much as Kai. “Let me go.”

“Or what?” Kai gritted through his teeth as he got a hand ready to give a blow at Luhan’s jaw. “Or you won’t even know why she ing left you.”

“Kai?”

All he did was smile as his hand reached over to tuck strands of her hair away from her face to the back of her ear. Her lips quivered as she tried to reach for him – touch him but she couldn’t. Her hands remained stagnant as he placed a hand on hers to assure her he was there with an angelic smile on his face. “Eunji-ah.” His voice sounded so smooth and perfect in her mind – just like it has always been ever since he left.

“Kai.” All she could do was call out his name as if it was the only word she knew.

“Kai!” She found herself opening her eyes with heavy breathing and a hand on her chest. Her eyes stared at the ceiling in disappointment – it was all a dream. A dream that was too good to be true. Her head tilted to her left where his figure was in her dream – it felt so real, she could easily imagine him looking at her right here and now. Knowing it would never come true, her hands lifted up to mask her face as she shed silent tears – she wanted to see him again.

Another day rolled by and with the bear sitting on the chair at the corner of the room, she smiled at it the moment she woke up. “Good morning.” She smiled at the bear in a soft smile as she sat up on the bed even though she struggled a little but when she leaned back against the bed, she sighed softly. Looking down on her hand, she twisted and turn the ring on her finger before she smiled at it.

“Do you think I’m a bad person for doing such a thing?” She questioned the bear that was sitting opposite her on the bed after she struggled to get it on. She pulled the bear up to hug it tightly, “I hope not but… I guess I am. At least I can pretend you're him... since he got this bear for me.”

“I promised him I wouldn’t make him cry but… look at me, breaking my promises as if I don’t care.” She mumbled sadly, hugging the bear tighter. “But I guess it’ll all be alright, it won’t hurt when I leave – the doctors said so.”

He couldn’t process the words Luhan had said to him and everything was going haywire in his mind. The video camera he had in his hands was enough to prove to him that the love she had for him before he left was still lingering – she still loves him and he could tell just by looking at the video that each second passed by, he felt his heart shattering.

“Marrying another person? You know damn well you're the only person who has her heart. If she were to marry a person in this planet or anyone for the fact, it would be you and only you - no one else. We all know that. My house is under renovation? I have to be there to take care of her, Kai. My house was never under renovation and she stopped work just like she told you in the letters.

She’s been fighting against brain cancer for two years, Kai."

With a slamming of the door, he was gone to make things right before it was all too late.

The door opened carefully as he entered the room silently, already in tears as he closed the door behind him. As she lifted her chin, expecting the one who had accompanied her for the past few days, her eyes were wide like saucers when he was not the person she was expecting.

“K-Kai…” She breathed out quietly the moment he sniffed, dragging himself towards her as he sat down on the seat provided beside her. Was this… a dream?

“What are you doing here?” Her voice entered his ears and he was right – Luhan was right.

She was cold, heartless and merciless towards him just to protect him. He didn’t appreciate it at all. The bear at the corner of the room existed as it remained motionless to his eyes. She kept it and she didn't lose it - how could she ever lose it? He cried even harder knowing that she kept it.

Her question was left unanswered when he couldn’t control the tears streaming down his face. “Why did you hide it from me?” His voice cracked in between, as he tried so hard to stop crying but he couldn’t – how could he find the will to stop when he knows she’ll be leaving him so soon? He didn’t even have enough time to tell her everything he’s experienced while she was gone. There were so many things left to say, so many things left to do.

When finally he calmed down, he stared at her blankly as she kept silent. “What are you doing?” His voice was shaky and he didn’t know if he should move, or if he should walk away but he stayed still, allowing her to come closer. She looked at him with a small smile forming on her face as if it was the only thing to keep her sane – she knew Luhan was the one who had told Kai. As much as she wanted to be harsh on Kai, acting as if everything Luhan said was a lie, she couldn’t. Knowing that she’ll finally be gone, she couldn’t find the strength to push him away when he knows already.

The damp of tears in her heart was threatening to burst but something, just something, kept it together.

“I’m not sure.” She breathed out honestly and quickly as she sealed her lips together by pressing them tight to show she wasn’t on the edge of crying but he could see through her like a piece of glass. She was not alright.

He had also hurt the girl he loved.

“I don’t know if this is a good idea,” Her lips quivered as she continued, “I don’t know if I’ll cry but…”

Her hand lifted up slowly as she trembled and struggled to place it on his cheek. Just like the first time she’s ever laid her hands on him, he shuddered in the inside just feeling the warmth of her skin he’s been missing all this while. His lips parted involuntarily while she hurriedly placed a hand between her nose and her upper lip to prevent the tears from streaming down her face.

Her bitter smile broke out to a much painful one the moment a tear rolled down her cheek – knowing this would be the last time.

“It feels the same.”

He reached up, shaking, as he held onto her hand on his cheek to grip onto it tight. He moved to sit on the bed beside her as he gently tugged her over to trap her in his embrace. “Please don’t leave me,” Kai pleaded as he hugged her tight even though he knows she’s in this condition but she wouldn’t have it any other way. He allowed himself to cry with her the moment she wrapped her arms around him weakly, “I’m sorry…” Her voice was much more sincere – it broke his heart. He could never imagine a life without her and he wanted her to stay by his side forever. Not wanting to say anything that could break this moment, they stayed like that for a long while as he cherished this.

Please take me with you, Eunji.

"You're wearing it..." He croaked out softly as he stared at her. "What?" Her head bobbed forward a little and he gave a faint smile, pointing at the necklace around her neck. She looked down and smiled inwardly - she always wore it and she could never take it off. "Yeah," She agreed, lifting her chin to smile at him as he held onto her hand tight. "I've been wearing it everyday - it was like my source of strength."

"You're my source of strength." She clarified further and he frowned slightly.

Her eyes widened as she gave him a slight squeeze on his hand. "W-Why? What's the matter?"

He shook his head as another tear rolled down his cheek. His hand shot up to quickly wipe it off as he continued to look at her. "I can't imagine what it would be like without you..."

"Then here." She lifted her hand, away from his as she took out her ring as she gently slipped his ring off his hand. "Eunji..."

"Shh." She hushed him quietly and slipped a ring back onto his hand, and vice versa.

"Now you have my ring, and I have yours. Even when I leave, I will always remember you but when I'm gone, you'll have to find your true happiness but, please remember me, Kai..."

He shook his head, letting another tear roll down. "You're my true happiness, Eunji. No one can ever replace that title."

"I know," She nodded once, proceeding to lace their fingers together. "But you'll have to do it someday."

The moment he opened his eyes, he felt coldness in his hands. The last thing he remembered was he talked to her to his heart’s content – a wish he was willing to grant for her as well as his own. He finally got to tell her the things he’s experienced while he was overseas and the corny jokes came in – he was finally happy after being devastated for the past weeks. He knows this wouldn’t last for long and he can hope for miracles but he has to face the fact whether he wants to or not. Even with all of that, he still wants to pretend as if everything was going to be alright although numbing the pain now, wasn’t such a good idea.

Nothing mattered to him as long as he got to see her beautiful smile, listen to her smooth laugh as if it could replay over and over again. He got to hear the things she’s done while he was gone and everything felt so perfect. He then noticed she was really tired, and he allowed her to sleep with him holding onto her hand as he sat down on the chair and unknowingly, he fell asleep with her.

He opened his eyes, lifting his head from the bed only to see that she was still asleep but something was a little off here. He gripped onto her hand and it was really cold as if she was frozen. “E-Eunji,” He shook her hand gently as he stared at her, waiting for her to wake up but it was taking longer than he imagined. Is she really tired?

“B-Baby, wake up. Are you cold?” He asked worriedly as he shook her hand. His eyes travelled to the heart rate monitor beside her and it was just a fine line – there was no beat. “E-Eunji-ah.” He raised his voice, shaking her hand vigorously this time as he stood up from his chair, kicking it backwards as it fell to the ground. “Wake up!” He shouted this time, throwing her hand away as he gripped her by her shoulders, giving her a good shake as the hot tears collected in his eyes, causing them to fall onto her as he didn’t stop shaking her body in hopes her eyes would just open.

“I have so many things to tell you!” Kai shouted as the tears wouldn’t stop streaming down. His vision was getting blurry, the world around him started to crumble and he couldn't find his grip on reality as the time ticked.

“Just open your eyes and I will tell you!” His breathings got heavier as he felt his lungs not functioning properly. He tried so hard to keep himself together but even he knew that he was going to break down harder than before - it was all happening too soon.

“Don’t you want to hear me say ‘I love you’ one more time before you go?!”

Because he would want to her hear say that she loves him so much that it hurts. He wants to hear her angelic voice just one more time, telling him she loves him with all her heart just like how he loves her so much that it's killing him slowly like a poisonous drug planted in his heart. He wants to hear her voice again - and again - and again.

Her squeals.

Her whimpers.

Her laughs.

Her chuckles.

Her.

“Please Eunji! Wake up!” His shouts got softer as he didn't have the strength to do it anymore.

He couldn't carry on doing this - it was all hurting him so much.

"Please..." His voice cracked in pain as he fell to his knees.

“Wake up for me!”

Her body remained motionless as he shook her tiredly - he wants more time with her. A hand was on his mouth as he couldn't stop his tears from rolling down his face and to the ground.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye." His voice was inaudible as his hand trembled, reaching over to place it on her dry, pale cheek that was going to be wet because his hand was wet with his tears.

"I didn't get to kiss you, one last time, before you left." His thumb brushed over her lips - the pair of lips he didn't get to kiss.

The door creaked open and Kai shot his head at the door to meet with Luhan’s confused look. “Get the doctor! Q-Quick!”

“S-She gave this to me a few hours before she passed on. She said that I should only give this to you after she passed on…”

Sitting by her side even though she was gone, he didn’t want to leave her side just yet. He opened the letter only to see it was her handwriting – hers and only hers.

‘Because you’re the only special boy to me,
 The only one, from now until eternity,
 Like a missing puzzle piece from the start,
 You were the only one who had my heart.

My heart… was with you the whole time. Even now, when I’m gone, it will forever be yours. I love you.'

He scooted closer despite her body covered with a white cloth. He held onto the paper tight as he got up to hover above her. His hand reached up to open the white cloth to reveal her beautiful face. Even if her soul wasn't there, he knew her heart was. The cloth was lowered down until he could have a full view of her face.

It was pale and emotionless, but it was still the most beautiful thing to him.

He dipped down to press his lips against her forehead, silently begging her to come back.

He then moved and lowered his head to bury his face over her shoulder in the soft mattress, intentionally hugging her as he did so – he would give anything to bring her back but he couldn’t.

It was all too late.