Write to Me

*Requested by -Beats

Wonsik checks the clock—4:15. Everyday, precisely at 4:15, Wonsik throws on his coat and takes his daily drive down to Gonjiam Psychiatric Hospital. It's been a normal routine for him ever since he learned of Taekwoon's prescence being there. Fresh out of college and yearning to start his career in the medical profession, he had often volunteered in aiding the mentally challenged at his local hospital. It was only for a limited amount of time and Wonsik can truly say he enjoyed it and he often keeps in contact with every patient's caretaker. Taekwoon... Taekwoon is just one of the patients he happened to become attached to.

Taekwoon isn't like the other patients; he never speaks, he never makes eye contact, and from what Wonsik has been told, he's never had any type of physical contact (fresh out of the womb and being wrapped in a towel doesn't count). Most of the patients speak and initiate some sort of social interaction but Taekwoon does nothing of those things. He likes to isolate himself, mentally, phyiscally, and emotionally and when he tires of being bottled up, he likes to paint pictures on his thighs and biceps. He's aggressive too, especially when the women in white come in to give him his medication and check his vitals; he's tried choking them with their stethescopes more than once.

Wonsik decides to wear his blue varisty jacket today since blue's the color Taekwoon hates the least. He's been visiting Taekwoon for about a year now: observing him, talking to him, telling him about his day, normal people stuff as Wonsik likes to describe it. Deep, down inside, Wonsik knows it's useless trying but something about Taekwoon says "I'm listening" even if his body is doing something otherwise like being turned away from him. It's an hour long drive to Gwangju but if it means keeping Taekwoon company, it's worth it.

It's about 5:30 by the time Wonsik pulls in to the parking lot—traffic was hell and the fact that it started pouring midpoint are great contributors. He works his hand inside the glove compartment, finding everything except the one thing he needs (the umbrella is under his seat but he realizes that after he's sopping wet).

"Good evening, Mr. Kim. I love the new look," one of the receptions at the front desk tease. The nurses that manage to hear giggle as they pass by.

"Very funny, Myungjin. Oh! My sides hurt from laughing too much," he deadpans. Seconds later, he's making himself chuckle. "What's Taekwoon's position?"

"He just took his medication so he should be winding down right now. You're free to go in, like always, but mind you, he's been having a tough day—choked Gunwoo again."

"Have you changed his prescription again?" Wonsik asks, attempting to drain some water from his shoe.

"I don't think so but then again, I'm not in charge of that part of the facility." Myungjin pulls up the medication file for Wonsik to see. Leaning over the counter, he goes over each required script. Nothing's changed.

"That's odd. I'll have to ask Dr. Yungmin about that."

Myungjin scoffs quietly as she gets back to putting in billing information. "Why don't you just work here? You obviously have some knowledge as to what you're doing and we could use some more generous people like you around."

Wonsik laughs a little and runs a hand through his hair. "I have a job back in North Jeolla that I can't just leave."

"North Jeolla, that's about an hour from here. Well, if you ever change your mind, the position's open... and I personally wouldn't mind seeing you more often either." Myungjin goes red.

"Thanks. I'll keep it in mind. Get home safely." Wonsik gives a wave and heads towards the end of the building where Taekwoon's room is located. Each patient has an assigned nurse but because of how aggressive Taekwoon gets, his nurses constantly change, rotating on schedule.

Once he reaches the room, he knocks on the door once and enters. Taekwoon has his back towards him and he seems to be looking out of the window; he likes when it rains. Sometimes when the water beads on the windows, he'll use his finger and follow the droplets down, down, down.

Wonsik takes a seat at the desk placed flush against the wall. He stays quiet for at least five minutes since Taekwoon becomes visually uncomfortable although Wonsik's been visiting him some time now. He's still not at that level of accepting other human presence around him.

From what Wonsik can see, his arm is bandaged which means he probably had decided to paint "pretty" pictures again. It literally kills Wonsik to see him so... isolated. He wishes to take him away from here and just allow him to see the world without any restrictions.

"Hey Taekwoon," Wonsik starts quietly, "how have you been? I see your arm is bandaged again. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you. I know it's probably not my fault or anything but I know I could have stopped it somehow." Taekwoon doesn't move from his position but when Wonsik started talking, his eyes flickered over to him quickly.

"I had a friend that used to do that. His name was Jungmin. He's no longer here though. He killed himself a couple of months ago. I hope you don't kill yourself. I know you don't talk or anything but I can tell you're a great listener." Wonsik sighs and watches as Taekwoon's hair moves slightly with the turn of his head. His hair was always so long and beautiful. It reaches down to his shoulders and he tends to only wear it down. Sometimes Wonsik gets the urge to just go over and touch it. If he ever did, would Taekwoon allow him?

"Myungjin offered me a position to start working here. I don't think there's an actual job. I'm sure she probably just said that so she'll get to see me more. I think she likes me." Taekwoon's eyes flicker over again. "With as many times I come to see you in a week, I'm sure you're getting tired of seeing me." Wonsik chuckles.

"What if I did stop visiting? Would you make better progress?" Wonsik asks him even though he knows his usual answer will be just silence; Taekwoon continues to look out the window. "I might have to stop visiting since I'm more than likely starting med school this year." Wonsik pouts and plays with the zipper on his jacket.

"What's been going on with you?" He waits a few seconds before speaking again. "Oh, me too. It's a pain, right?" He slaps himself on the face for being so stupid but if Taekwoon could laugh, he's sure he would. Pulling out his phone, Wonsik checks the time and readies himself to leave. It's already seven o'clock even though it feels like he was there for only five minutes.

"Well, it looks like it's my time to leave now. It was good seeing you again even though I'll be back tomorrow. Oh! I brought you a present even though it's against the rules. Don't tell them I gave this to you," he whispers and fishes the two objects from his pocket: a wad of sticky notes and a pen. Giving him the pen probably isn't a good idea especially since Wonsik was just informed of Taekwoon's sudden violence earlier today. If he wasn't going to speak, then he might as well express himself through writing—that was Wonsik's logic. He places the two gifts quietly on the desk before leaving.

"Sleep well, Taekwoon," he says.

Today is Sunday, the only day in the week where Gonjiam patients are allowed outside the whole day. Well, it's more regulation that they go outside to get some fresh air at least once duing the week. If they were to keep them inside all the time, that would be considered "first-degree kidnapping." Does such a thing even exist? Wonsik thinks it's stupid.

It's only a few minutes before it's time for him to leave but his mother just won't get off the damn phone.

"Why don't you see me everyday like you do that boy?" she hisses. Wonsik rolls his eyes.

"He's a patient, Mother. It's not like you're the one in a home for the mentally ill."

"You keep skipping on spending some time with the one that birthed you and I'll sure as hell get there," she spits.

Wonsik is in between balancing his phone against his shoulder and ear while attempting to put on his Adidas jacket. "What does it matter to you? You're the one constantly telling me to be more selfless."

There's a bit of static before she speaks again. "That's when there's someone you're not in love with involved." Wonsik stops to fully comprehend what she just said.

"In- what? I am not in love with him. He's a patient and that's all he is."

"Then please explain why it is you insist on visiting him everyday," she tries.

"I am going to be a doctor. It's good practice."

"You're sick in love with him. That's it. You're visiting tomorrow whether your little patient likes it or not." She cuts off the call and leaves Wonsik angry and bothered.

"In love with him. That's insane," he grumbles to himself as he starts the car and begins the drive.

Once he gets there, the whole place seems to brighten up immediately. The sun shines beautifully on the newly blossoming flowers planted in the garden in the back. There are several nurses and their patients outside sitting on benches and touching the flowers that brush against their legs. Myungjin waves to Wonsik and gestures that Taekwoon is still inside. He hasn't been outside in how many months again? Give or take six months.

"Jiyoon, Seunghyun." Wonsik nods his head as a greeting. "What's Taekwoon's position?"

"Ilsung just gave him his medicine. He should be outside but no one can get him to leave the room."

"Unless someone else can do it?" Jiyoon hints.

"I'm not Superman here and I'm not forcing him to do anything he doesn't want to. Sorry." He holds his hands up, palms facing out.

"It was worth a shot," Seunghyun says with a shrug. "He's in a really bad mood."

"Yeah, no kidding." Jiyoon nods her head in agreement.

"He's being extremely aggressive and he cut his arms and legs up again." Wonsik can literally feel his face fall and his heart breaking in his chest.

"How bad were they?" Wonsiks asks, now on edge.

"They had to give him stitches," Seunghyun says quietly. Wonsik winces slightly just thinking about it.

"Thanks for telling me. I'll see you guys." Wonsik heads down the hallways but once he's out of their sight, he books it and runs to Taekwoon's room at top speed. He knocks once and enters. Taekwoon is sitting in front of the window again, arm bandaged and slung over his right leg. Wonsik wants to reach out and touch him in the most platonic way possible. He wants to hug him and be the one he allows to see his true self.

"Taekwoon? You okay? It's me, Wonsik. Don't hit me." Wonsik inches in slowly and takes his seat at the desk. The pen and sticky notes are still on the table but Wonsik can see writing etched into the next piece of paper. Taekwoon doesn't even do much as to look over at him; he's staring out the window and hugging his knee. Wonsik looks at him for a bit then realizes why he acted out. He must have thought Wonsik wouldn't be there to see him anymore.

Taking the pen, Wonsik writes a little message:

I'm not going to stop visiting you. I like you too much.

Once he's done, he places the whole sticky note bunch and pen next to him and waits until Taekwoon reads it. It takes about five minutes before Taekwoon notices the note placed next to him. He doesn't move his head to read it, just moves his eyes down. Wonsik tries not to make it look like he's staring at him but he gives up on disguising himself as he sees a small smile appear and suddenly Taekwoon is writing something back.

i guess i like you too. can you take me outside?

Prompt: Leo is in a mental ward and Ravi often visits him