Chapter Four

               Standing on the curb of the street, cars rushing past me, I stared blankly. The whooshing noises they were making made me shift from foot to foot uneasily. An abrupt horn sounding off made me break out in cold sweat as memories flickered behind my eyes. Reaching down to grab Yumi’s wrist, I held it in a death grip, just needing something to ground me to the present. Yumi looked up at me and gave me a worrying look. Shaking my head, I stepped out into the traffic once it had stopped for the light.

We had said goodbye to Hachirou at the restaurant since he hadn’t gotten enough singles to get a picture. Once we had gotten back to the tower, Yumi bounded up the stairs, as light as a fairy, to where we could see the signing had just started to finish up. Only about 10 eager fans waited in line, clutching their singles as if they were their lifelines.

Yumi and I took a seat in the plastic chairs we had sat in earlier. Only about 30 other fans were waiting like us to get a picture. While we sat, Yumi pulled out her phone and tweeted away to her online friends about the event. Not having anything worth doing, I leaned back in my seat and gazed around. The long event was definitely straining the band members, as they weren’t as enthusiastic as before and their smiles were starting to look fake. Tsuzuku kept glancing around every couple moments as if he was waiting for someone. Suddenly a bright smile lit up his face, his contact purple eyes met mine. He gave me a lop-sided grin and turned back to the female fan that was trying to engage him in conversation. I laughed quietly and Yumi looked up at me and back to Tsuzuku, she frowned and went back to phone. Shifting awkwardly, I pulled out my phone and scrolled through Tumblr to pass the time.

After about another 30 minutes of waiting, the only people left were a few fans waiting to get their pictures taken with them. Most of the other people had already finished and had left. When it was Yumi and I’s turn we stepped out of the line and walked over to the band members. I stood off to the side since this was Yumi’s picture and I was just an extra. Feeling a warm hand on my shoulder, I turned my head to see Tsuzuku standing behind me; he shuffled me over beside Yumi so we were both in the centre of the picture. He leaned down to my ear, “I like your shirt,” he murmured so everyone else wouldn’t hear.

I looked down at my Black Moral shirt and back to him, “A GazettE fan, eh?” I smiled.

He softly laughed, “The biggest.”

Tsuzuku wrapped his arms around Yumi and I and the picture was taken. We were sent to another spot in the large room, but just as we were leaving the band members, Tsuzuku reached out and grabbed my hand, pulling me back to him. “Did you get my message?” he whispered so that no one else would hear.

I nodded. Pulling me closer to him, I heard a click of a camera. “Are you actually going to show up?” he raised an eyebrow at me.

I gave him a light-hearted glare and shrugged, “You’ll never know til the day,” I gave him a mysterious grin and walked off to wear Yumi was.

She hadn’t seen the encounter as she was eagerly facing the desk, waiting for the photo to be printed for her to take home. I walked up as she received the envelope and we left the tower together to go home. We were almost to the station when I realized I had work at 6, it was 4:40 now, so I had just enough time to run home, get changed into my work clothes and run to work.

I had made it to Hohokan Café minutes before my shift started, so I checked in and threw on my apron, prepared to face a long night of being a waitress. I had been working at this Café so long that everything was like clockwork to me. I was able to let my mind drift all I wanted and I never got a customer’s order wrong. Although I hated working the night shifts as they were basically dead. Barely anyone came in after 8:30, so I was left twiddling my thumbs until ten. When the shift finally ended, I stepped out into the crisp autumn night and gazed up at the sky. The sun had long set, and the clouds effectively covered the moon and stars making it pitch dark outside. I hiked my slouchy bag higher up on my shoulders and started my walk to the subway.

I nervously looked around and started walking a little faster. My boot toe hooked on the edge of the sidewalk and I tumbled out onto the road. Slowly I rose to my feet as I had bumped my knee badly. I took a second to let my eyes adjust to the darkness, but there was light. For a second I was confused to where this light was coming from. Turning around, I saw 2 bright headlights glaring at me. I tried to move, but memories sped towards me piling memories of crying, memories of pain and memories of sadness. They weighed down my legs, making me helpless to the oncoming car. I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the extreme pain of the impact, but it didn’t happen. I was standing a few feet away from the road, warm arms were wrapped around me, and someone was panting. The arms squeezed tighter and then loosened to turn me around. I looked up to meet Tsuzuku’s almond eyes. He tightened his arms around me again, and I buried my head into his chest, tears welling up in my eyes and streaming down onto his sweater. I was surrounded in his spicy scent, and it was comforting. My hands desperately clutched to his shirt, pulling him closer, to erase the horrifying memories with his spicy scent and the comfort that was radiating off of him. He pulled back slightly and led us over to a bench a few feet away. I sat down and instantly pulled my legs up to my body, wrapping my arms around them and hiding my face from him. He slid over and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me back to his body.

After I had stopped sobbing, I lifted my face to meet his. “The memories…” was all I whispered as my body crumpled against his and I instantly fell asleep, the emotional turmoil of the memories too much for me to handle.

I peeled open my dead-tired eyes to meet sunlight seeping through the black blinds on an unfamiliar window, not just an unfamiliar window, an unfamiliar room. The silky sheets were soft against my skin and the bed was higher up and 20x more comfortable compared to my futon. Instead of the walls being littered with posters, a few select pieces of artwork decorated the room, all slightly dark and morbid looking. As I was looking around, I saw a dark object a few feet away, sound asleep on the small couch opposite of the room. I freaked out soon realizing that this was Tsuzuku’s room. I’m in Tsuzuku’s room… Yumi’s going to kill me…  

He was dressed in low rising sweat pants and no shirt. I stared for a second, analyzing his tattoos. My face felt hot as I realized he could wake up at any second and see me staring at him. As I got up I became aware of the pain in my leg and hands where I had hit them off the hard pavement. I groaned quietly and stretched, while looking back to Tsuzuku. Not knowing whether I should wake him or not, I inaudibly shuffled over to where he was sleeping. I quietly said his name, but he didn’t wake. So I proceeded to poke his cheek. After about the 3^rd poke, he slowly opened his eyes to see my face half a foot away from his. He quickly sat up, breathing deeply as if I had scared him. I laughed and sat down on the bed across from him. “So how’re you doing?” he asked quietly, gazing at me, eyes full of sympathy.

Looking down, frowning, I shifted awkwardly in my seat and slowly lifted my eyes to meet his. “A bit better now, sorry for worrying you.”

Smiling gently at me, he murmured no worries and got up and left the room. Following him out, I glanced around the house, taking in his dark sense of décor. He led me to the kitchen where I sat down and he fished two bowls out of the cupboard and filled them with cereal. He placed one in front of me and one in his spot, placing the jug of milk between us. Taking a bite of his cereal, his eyes shifted around the room before they returned to me. “You kept saying something about memories,” he stated.

My eyes widened, not knowing that I had been muttering that, I looked down at the cereal, swirling it around the spoon. “My brother…” I whispered, hesitating, “h-he was hit by a car when he was 10 and I-I was 16… W-we were walking home from his friend’s house, since Mom had asked me to go get him, a-and he was balancing between the sidewalk and the road. He stumbled on a rock and out a no-where a car smashed into him. L-leaving blood everywhere.” By that time I was hyperventilating, digging my nails in my arm, leaving crescent marks.

He grabbed my wrists and turned my body to face his, my watery eyes met him. “Adrianna. You’re here with me, only me.”

He held me to his chest, gently my hair and whispering that in my ear as I calmed down. Although every time I shut my eyes, that scene would happen. The blood, so much blood. I pulled back from his arms, and got a hold on my armor. “I want to thank you for your hospitality, but I should be going now,” I said tiredly as I dragged my body out of the chair.

He stayed sitting with a sad expression on his face. “Can I at least have your number so I can call you to see if you’re okay?”

I nodded slowly, “where’s my bag? My phone’s in the bag.”

He got up and led me over to the coat rack where my bag lay abandoned at the base. I fished it out and handed it to him. Putting in his number, he grabbed his phone out of a pocket in his pajamas and handed it to me to put my number in. I handed it back afterwards and slipped on my coat and boots. Hoisting my bag up on my shoulder I started to walk out the door when he grabbed my shoulder. “Can I walk you home?”

I nodded slightly, and waited for him to change his clothes. I flipped through the messages on my phone and noticed several missed calls from Yumi and a few text messages. Groaning inwardly, I type her number in and held the phone up to my ear. A half a ringtone later, she picked up in a frantic, wondering where I was. I didn’t want to tell her I was Tsuzuku’s house, but I was bad at lying so I vaguely said I was at a friend’s house and forgot to call. I quickly said goodbye and hung up as Tsuzuku walked back into the room, not wanting her to hear his voice. He held out the crook of his arm and I hesitantly looped mine through his. Leading us out the door of his house and down the steps, we headed towards my shabby apartment. We didn’t talk the entire walk, but the silence was pleasant, too much had been said anyways. The roads were pretty empty and the late morning sun warmed my back; taking away the oncoming winter chill. I heard a clicking sound behind me, but thought nothing of it; it was probably just a tourist’s camera anyways. Once we reached the apartment building, I awkwardly looked between it and Tsuzuku. “Uhmm, did you want to come in?” I asked, scratching my head with my free hand.

He smiled and shook his head, “no, sorry, maybe next time. As much as I’d rather hang out with you, I have to work on tracking the new album, so I’ll see you later,” he smiled slightly and wrapped his arms around me in a hug.

It took a second, but I hugged him back lightly. My armor now fully back in place, the anti-socialness creeping in. Stepping back, I gave him a little wave and retreated up the stairs to my apartment. I watched his receding figure for a second, before opening the door and facing a whole new round of problems. Yumi being worried.