Loss
Snow White
Im Yoona hummed a lullaby, as she skipped about the forest, the basket held in the crook of her arm as she plucked apples for the Queen.
She knew it seemed suspicious for the Queen to request her to do something so suddenly, but she decided not to question anything.
If she had questioned, the Queen would just force her to do something worse instead.
Yoona shrugged, ignoring her earlier suspicions as she searched for the brightest, sweetest apple.
As she detached the fruit from it's stalk,
she heard it.
Rustling of leaves, and then the sound of a string being pulled back, the slicing of air.
She freezed, as the breeze seemed to come to a standstill.
Yoona could feel her senses heighten, as her fingers curl together nervously.
"Don't. Move." came a voice of a man behind her.
The basket of apples fell, the fruits rolling around, it's shine tainted by the soil.
Yet, Yoona still turned around, facing the man, her eyes wide in fear.
"I said don't move," Donghae frowned, as he drew the bow back further, aiming for her heart. He actually wanted to finish the job without looking at her face, so at least he wouldn't feel as bad.
He felt his heart crumble as Yoona just stared at him, her eyes glassy and jaw agape.
He tried to let go of the arrow, tried to finish off what he was supposed to do, tried to choose his kin over this stranger.
But he couldn't.
His conscience was practically screaming and clawing at him.
Then again.. If he didn't do it, his family and village would be in trouble.
He would chose his family over the princess obviously, but both parties are innocent. His choice was clear, but that didn't mean it made it any less hard to execute the job.
He was at a loss.
Just let go of the string, you idiot.
But she's innocent, you don't even know her.
Just a movement of your finger, snap, then your family would be saved.
Don't let yourself be a monster. The guilt will eat you alive.
"W-why?" Yoona finally mouthed out, when she realised the man was just staring at her, his eyebrows deeply furrowed.
Donghae's hand started to tremble, as cold swear dotted his forehead. He was at a loss, he didn't know what to do.
He then let out a frustrated yell and let go of the arrow, before crumbling to the floor.
The arrow sliced forward and Yoona felt her heart stop, her mind whirling until she heard the thud sound of cracking wood.
She stood frozen for a moment, before turning around to see the arrow splitting the tree behind her.
She gulped.
That could have been her being split in the middle.
Yoona then turned forth, and was ready to run for her life when she realised her supposed killer was sitting on the dirt, covering his face with his hands.
She knew innately, that he wouldn't have missed. The way he drew his bow back, aimed slightly to the left according to the wind, made her understand exactly his level of proficiency in hitting the bullseye - her heart. He must have missed his target on purpose.
Question is, why? She wanted to know.
Yoona's quickly rushed to him, placing her warm hand on his shoulder.
"Are you okay?"
After a pause, an empty laugh erupted from Donghae.
Yoona just stared at him.
"You came to check if the person who was about to kill you was okay?" Donghae chuckled, his laughter dying away.
Yoona bit her lip and looked down.
"B-but you didn't kill me.. You must have missed for a reason.. Right?" Yoona frowned and weakly reasoned her action, pulling him into a sitting position.
Donghae felt his conscience burning into his insides like acid. The princess was so naive, innocent and kind that she came to see if her killer was alright.
How could he murder her? The guilt would devour him alive.
"I-I was ordered to kill you.. I'm sorry princess.. But I can't do it anymore. I can't.." Donghae swallowed.
"W-what? I don't understand..." Yoona frowned.
"The Queen. She wants you dead, and she wanted me to bring your heart in this wooden box.. In exchange for the safety of my family and village.. But I- I mean you're innocent too so I can't just kill you," Donghae explained, getting straight to the point.
He didn't catch the slight curl of Yoona's lips.
Donghae just continued on. "Quick, run, princess! Run! Don't go back to the castle or you'll get killed!" Donghae finally looked at her, his eyes wide in panic.
"But what about your family and village?"
Donghae didn't respond.
Yes, what about them?
"I-"
"Pass me the box. I'll get an animal's heart and pass it to the Queen instead," Yoona smiled assuringly. "You almost got your hands bloodied because of me, so I'll do it for you."
"But-"
"Don't worry. I have something to pick up at the castle anyway so let me give the box to her. I can pass it to the servants to hand it to her and I know my way around the castle grounds. Go, go and evacuate your family and village and escape far away."
"But you might get killed if you go back!" Donghae frustratedly yelled, ignoring her words.
Yoona only smiled, and she strangely resembled the wicked Queen for a second.
"I'm stronger than that, and stronger than the Queen. You'll see. Now, go."
____
Donghae should have refused her, but soon his worry for his family grew and he quickly dashed through the trees, and towards his home.
The Princess did make sense. If he decided to disobey the Queen's order, he had just signed his death contract.
Donghae didn't care if he lived or not, but he couldn't let his family and village pay for his actions and choices. He had to be fast, who knew how quick the Queen would get to know of this and send an assassin after him and his village.
As soon as he saw the endless rows of trees finally let some light breathe into it, he picked up speed and broke into a clearing, finally reaching the village.
Now, he had to find the village head to notify them and bring them to safety, and then he-
Wait.
Donghae felt something burn his insides.
Where's the village entrance?
..Where was everything?
..Where was everyone?
Donghae felt like someone stabbed him and twisted the blade in his heart.
Too late.
Too late, dear hunter.
___
Donghae stood rooted to the black soil, numb. He didn't want to venture further.
And he didn't need to.
Rows and rows of burnt huts, crumbled into black crisps on the cold hard ground.
Withered, black trees with small sparks at it's end, as grey ash gently swept past the non existent leaves.
The air was layered with smoke, pain and loss.
Donghae fell onto the ground on his knees, as he stared into the distance.
This was all his fault. All his fault.
He was so selfish. He chose one life and his conscience over many other lives. How can he be so stupid?
He let out a frustrated growl as he punched the charred ground over and over again.
Soon, his knuckles were a mixture of blood and soot. But he didn't care, nor could he feel the pain.
He should have just ended the princess's life.
But.. He couldn't.
He didn't know what to think anymore. Didn't know what was right, what was the wrong decision.
".. Donghae?" A smoothly rough voice murmured.
The said man shot up, turning around abruptly.
Who called him? Someone survived?
"Ah Donghae! It's you.." The village head, Leetuek, smiled, his face weathered and clothes covered in soot.
Donghae just stared at him.
Leeteuk shook his head, glancing at the burned crisps.
"The village.. You should know by now.. Not many survived, since the huts were made from wood and straw." Leeteuk shook his head, pain evident in his eyes.
"You're parents.. Were not so fortunate.." Leeteuk heavily sighed.
Donghae had no response.
"..Donghae?"
Nada.
".. Hae?"
Leeteuk expected him to start cursing, or maybe cry that everything is gone - just something.
Something was better than nothing.
"Donghae? Are you okay?" Leeteuk asked, concerned, placing his hand on Donghae's shoulder.
Donghae roughly shook the man's hand off, glaring at the ground.
"Donghae ah, what's-"
"Don't touch me! I'm not worthy of your kindness.. It's my fault.. It's my fault everything is burnt and gone!" Donghae cried, backing away from Leeteuk.
"What? How can this be your fault?" Leetuek frowned.
Donghae swallowed, as the first tears spilled from his cheeks.
"The Queen.. She asked me to kill someone and if I didn't, my family and village would pay. B-but I-I didn't have the heart to finish the job because that someone is innocent.. I can't kill someone innocent .. And now.." Donghae's words started to be incoherent as his muffled cries came out together.
"And now, the Queen knows and she came to make everybody pay and burnt everything!" Donghae shrieked, agony embedded in his eyes.
Everything was gone.
His family.
His house.
His friends.
Guilt and regret burnt him more than grief.
Leeteuk stared at Donghae in confusion.
"W-what? But.. It wasn't the Queen who set this place on fire," Leeteuk frowned.
"Trust me, she-"
"Not at all! She didn't do anything. I can't be sure whether she did indeed ask you to kill someone, but she was not the one who ordered the demise of our village. She even rendered us medical aid and had a small shelter built not far from here," Leeteuk explained. "The-"
Donghae let out a dark chuckle, wiping away his tears.
"The whole kingdom's been fooled by her. She isn't an angel like she portrays herself to be, she's evil. The person she wanted me to kill was her own daughter! Her own blood and flesh!"
Leeteuk didn't seem fazed.
"I'm not surprised."
It was Donghae's turn to be puzzled as the last of his grief was temporarily replaced by bewilderment. "What? I met the princess before, she's kind and inno-"
"She's the one who ordered for our village to be burnt to the crisp. Not the Queen."
Donghae couldn't comprehend what Leeteuk just said.
"What? Where did you ever hear of that! The Princess-"
"Is the evil one. One of the bandits who set our village on fire was captured by us. After a while of torturing by grief and hatred-ridden villagers, he finally begged us to let him free and he spilled everything," Leeteuk paused as he took a deep breath, trying not to let his anger get the better of him.
"He said the Princess sent him. Sent them to burn us just this morning."
Donghae shook his head. "No you don't understand.. The Queen was the one who threatened to hurt us! And how can you just believe the bandit so easily?"
"Look, Dong-"
"The Queen is the bad one here! Not only did she burn our village, she is trying to kill her daughter! And she's setting her own daughter up right now!"
Donghae knew the Queen was framing her daughter because she wanted her eliminated, and death wasn't the only way. Getting the people to hate the Princess, dethrone her, was an equally devious way.
Everything was the Queen's doing, Donghae couldn't understand why it wasn't obvious to the village head.
Leeteuk sighed.
"Look, I need to get back to the shelter. I only came to check if there was anything useful that can still be retrieved from the debris. Believe what you want," Leeteuk said tiredly.
"The shelter's behind the well - i mean whatever that's left of the well. Find me there later, also if you need someone to talk to."
And he left.
Donghae sighed heavily, falling onto the ground with a thud.
He was so exhausted, but now he had no bed to return to, no kin to lean on.
He lost everything to the Queen.
How evil and powerful she really was, Donghae finally got a taste of it.
So evil that she would burn a whole village, kill many, mar her daughter's name and want her dead.
Donghae sighed and lay down on the dirt, the first pellets of rain falling, blending with his tears.
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