Yunho woke up in a start, the remnants of the dream still haunting his mind. Shaking his head, he tried to dissipate the fog that surrounded his brain. His body was soaked in cold sweat as he trembled, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. Eyes darting around, he scrounged for his presence, his eyes catching the slightest shift in the shadows.

"Are you okay, sir?"

He whirled his head around to see an air stewardess smiling at him. Her hair was clasped tightly in a bun and not a single hair was out of place. Her features were sharp but soft around the edges as her hazel eyes bored into his, the pleasant smile having gone stiff on her face.

"I'm sorry, I'm fine. Sorry."

Yunho quickly answered, fearing the look on the air stewardess's face. Seemingly satisfied with Yunho's answer, she nodded her head and strode off, attending to the customer who was sitting behind him. Yunho sighed. That was a close call indeed. He would not want to offend any air stewardesses, seeing as he was on and about the plane most of the time due to his job as an idol. Combing his hair with his slim and slender fingers, Yunho gently untangled the knots in his hair, heaving a sigh as he did so.

It has been so long since he last dreamed of him. It had been days, months even! Yet, why did he appear in his dreams once more? Why was the image of his twinkling smile engraved in his heart? The memories they used to have together seemed nothing more than a curse right now. He wished he could take it all away; the memories, the pain, the hurt, and the love he still had for him.

It has been years. They all said things would get better in time. They all said that love would fade eventually. In the end, had they been lying? If they had not, then why does this feeling persists after so long? He tried everything that he knew of. He stopped watching their videos. He stopped picking their calls. He tried dating. He tried almost everything but nothing worked out. It was just as predicted. Jung Yunho could never get over Kim Jaejoong. It was an impossibility.

Yunho chuckled bitterly. He was unprepared to return to Korea, but he had not much of a choice did he? No matter where he go, no matter where he is at, memories of him would always be there. Kim Jaejoong was everywhere he went. He was his heart. He was his life. He was the air he inhaled in everyday. He was the love of his life, his other half... How could he forget him so easily? How could he eradicate his presence in his heart? How was it even remotely possible?

To think that the things that we are desperately trying to erase are the things we remember the most. 

To think that the thing that used to be a blessing now turned out to be nothing more than a curse. 

To think that our love would resort to this.

Could any of us have predicted this? 

If we did, would we have continued on regardless, even if the pain was so much to bear...?

Yunho contemplated as the plane came to a stop, signalling yet the end of another journey. Removing the seat belt that was weighing his legs down, he stretched his legs muscles out before he got up and picked his luggage from the top trunk as he went.

As usual, the sight that greeted him was the same. The airport was bustling with his fans as they began chanting his names, whipping out their cameras as they did so. Yunho smiled bitterly. The sight was the same, the crowd was the same, but why was it now looking so foreign to him? Why did the presence of him matter so much?

It was as though Kim Jaejoong himself possessed the power to change the entire scene in front of him and transform it into a joyous one. It was as though Jung Yunho could not live without Kim Jaejoong.

Conscious of his image in his fans' eyes, Yunho whipped out his glasses immediately, covering the red eyes beneath his shades. Dragging the luggage behind him, he began picking up his pace, trying to avoid the crowd he could see forming in front of him.

One step. Two steps. Three steps. They all took a whole minute. Yunho cursed his feet as he tried to take longer strides and faster steps. The long flight to Korea back from Japan had numbed his thigh muscles and limited the pace he could walk in. Despite the earlier stretching he had did, his muscles were still not ready for such an intensive exercise. 

Sighing once more, Yunho resisted the urge to let out a scream of frustration. Why was everything going bad for him? First, the dream. Then, the air stewardess glaring at him. Now, his pair of useless feet that simply refused to go any faster. What was next? The man of his dreams appearing right in front of him?

Yunho growled in anger as he forced his feet muscles to work faster, his anger increasing with every stride. He was not overreacting, neither was he firm in denial. He just wanted to move out of the airport fast to prevent jamming the traffic at the airport. It was a normal thing for an idol to do. It obviously had nothing to do with the YunJae sign he had seen earlier, nor that huge sized poster of him he had seen a fan holding in her hands. It must have nothing to do with that. After all, didn't he stop loving him ages ago?

Deeply engrossed in his thoughts, he was so concentrated on his feet that were currently stomping on the ground that he barely saw the slight movement made by the passerby that was walking towards him. Turning in time, he narrowly avoided collision with the other party by a gap of a few mere inches. Apologising for the second time in the day, Yunho quickly stepped away, his eyes glancing upwards as he did so.

Thump.

His pupils dilated as his mouth parted to let out a silent breath of air. With trembling hands, he pushed the glasses up the bridge of his nose once more and squinted his eyes. It was no mistake. The three men in the advert for Tony Moly was really them. Instantly, the world around him faded and the chants of the fans became nothing but faint buzzing in his ears. It was no longer the chants of "Yunho" he was hearing but rather the chants of "Dong Bang Shin Ki" that was echoing in his ears...

At that moment, it was as though he was transported back in time. There was two figures in front of him; his lovely Junsu and Yoochun who were walking ahead to clear the path for them. He could see the bodyguards surrounding them, pushing fangirls away as they got too close. He could sense the distress coming from Junsu as yet another crazy girl molested his , giving it a quick squeeze. He could see Yoochun's impeding fury and his ferocious glare that he knew would melt that girl's hands off if he could. He could hear Yoochun whispering in Junsu's ears soothingly to comfort the distressed male. He observed Changmin sticking close to Junsu as he flung every hand away, taking care to protect that dearest hyung of his he always loved to bully. Then, he was no longer observing, their bodyguards were signalling to him now, asking him to walk faster. They had to evacuate before the crowd went totally out of control. He nodded his head in assent as he knew the urgency of the situation. They had to get out of here fast. Holding out his hand to the partner beside him, he smiled brightly as his partner placed his hands in his and they ran away from the mob together, hand in hand, like they were never meant to be separated... ...

Still memories were only memories were they? Yunho blinked his eyes as the recollection dissipated around him and he was pushed back into reality once more. Reality was now his life and fantasies were not applicable anymore. Looking away from the poster, his eyes strayed and caught the main huge poster that was situated right in the middle. He recognised the pair instantly. It was the man's best friends, Jang Geun Suk and Kim Hyun Joong.

Seems like he was moving on pretty well, was he?

Yunho let out a soft bitter chuckle as he struggled to swallow the lump forming in his throat. He was doing so well in forgetting him, yet here he was, still stuck in the past, unable to let go. Yunho sighed. He could never do it as well as Hyun Joong did, could he? It was just like the lawsuit that happened a few years back. He was not there to support Jaejoong's decision, but Hyun Joong was. Hyun Joong accompanied Jaejoong through every step of his journey. Hyun Joong stayed with him through it all. In the end, that was what really matters was it? He, Jung Yunho, would forever be the guy who abandoned him in time of need and he, Kim Hyun Joong, would always be the guy who was constantly there for him. It did not take a genius for him to figure out where his standing was. He knew. He could never get close to him. Jaejoong was simply too far away.

Swallowing the saliva that rose in his throat, Yunho looked at the poster once more, forcing himself to stare at the former members of DBSK. His frown curved into a smile. Then, he laughed. It was impossible for him to not feel happy for them despite all the bitterness he harbored inside. He knew they suffered too. He knew they were banned from both the Japanese media and the Korean media. He knew they could never get on variety shows and programs. He knew they had not seen a stage in ages. That was why he was so proud of them now. They stuck to their decisions, they pulled it through and lived with it. Now, they're finally reaping their rewards. They are starting a new journey. They are JYJ, Yunho beamed as the pride he felt at the success of his former band mates flooded him, overwhelming his senses.

"They really did well huh?" Yunho spoke as he lowered his eyes back to the fans in front of him, "They really did their best."

Turning his eyes back to the road before him, Yunho slowly staggered forward, his limbs sluggish in movement. The fog around his mind gradually cleared up with time and it was evident that the tension and frustration before was non existent. He was as relaxed as he could be now, and it was all because he saw their poster that had their smiling faces on it. Still, that meant that the three of them were happy, did it not? They did not regret their decisions and somehow, as their former leader, Yunho felt comforted by that fact.

"They've already moved on. Now, it's your turn Yunho!" Yunho mumbled to himself as the sight of the airport's exit became closer and closer to him. He could see the limo awaiting outside and the manager of his that was looking at him in worry. Yunho smiled back. It was alright. It was just a few more steps, and he would be out of there. Just a few more steps, and his past would be left behind. Just a few more steps, and the bitterness in him would fade. 

Just a few more steps, and maybe he wouldn't notice the absence of him in his life nor the tears b at the ends of his eyes.

The End.