Chapter 9

A picture that had been enlarged entered my vision, as I stared down at the discriminating content on my desk. My eyes fixed on the image of Hyorin standing in front of the pool gates – normal. Then my eyes fixed on the blurry image behind her. Myungsoo and I were captured in the background kissing.

My eyes widened and I gasped, covering my mouth with my hand. Hyorin immediately jerked my hand back down and shook her head alertly.   

“Don’t show a reaction.” She whispered. I nodded and gulped as I nervously fidgeted. She turned around and stood on the desk gaining everyone’s attention.

“Listen! This;” She held up the picture; “You’ve got it all wrong. How dare you people spread false rumors about the Queenka!  Look at it. You can’t prove that this is Jinah and Myungsoo.” She reasoned. A hopeful small smile spread on my lips.

“And you can’t prove that it isn’t!” Someone rudely answered back. Hyorin scoffed and placed a hand on her hip.

“Um yes, yes I can. Jinah was the one taking the picture. We all know she likes photography.” She played. Which wasn’t true, but it was her little trick to fool them.

“Aish I can’t take it. It was I!” I male voice boomed. Everyone’s attention diverted to a boy that came striding forward. He looked hastily around the room, a he gulped down saliva.

“It was me and my girlfriend. I’m sorry I didn’t realize that you were there. I’m in the wrong. This is my fault, I’m sorry I caused this – “

“Aish, I got it. Leave.” I growled relieved. He nodded nervously before he swiftly made his way out of my sight. I slumped down in my seat sighing in relief. 

“Those who did this!” I yelled gesturing to my desk. Classmates jerked around to face me like frightened puppies. I was going to make them pay for causing discomfort in my life, but I was still shaking and I wasn’t in the mood.

“I’ll let you off this time. But if you ever, ever disregard me or make my life hell, you just wait. You just wait I tell you. Now clear this up, now!” I furiously yelled. Startled peers nodded and quickly took away my desk replacing it with one of theirs.

“Excuse me, but where do I sit?” A shy girl sweetly asked. I glared at her and exhaled deeply as I rose out of my seat. I needed time to cool down and be by myself. I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Just sit here.” I said weakly before I stormed out of the classroom. I bolted up to the rooftop and was hit by the cool freshness of the wind.

That was what I needed, fresh air to calm me down. I looked up into the sky and started to cry.

Two strong arms wrapped around my shoulders pulling me against a comforting chest.

“Leave.” I harshly instructed as I tore myself out of the embrace. Myungsoo spun me around to face him.

“No. Jinah not when you’re like this. I’m sorry it’s all my fau - ”

“Do you think we should stop?’ I asked in a daze not realising I cut him off. He narrowed in his eyebrows and took his hands off my shoulders.

“Hm?”

“This. Us. The whole secret relationship we have going on. Do you think we should stop?” I asked sadly. His lips parted open and in an instant he roughly pulled me into a hug.

“No how could you say such a thing?” He shouted. I struggled to get out of his grip; my tears exiting out of my eyes became more frequent.

“Myungsoo let me go.” I ordered agitated. He tightened his arms around me. I beat his chest as he refused to let me go. It was like that for a few seconds, until I gave up trying to get away and just calmed down.

“I’ll never let you go, I promise.” He warmly whispered as he my hair. I closed my eyes, the last of my tears escaping down my cheek.

“Myungsoo.” I started. He let me go waiting to hear what I had to say. 

“What happened the other night, were we wrong to do so? I mean, besides the fact that we are siblings and not married, do you think we were somehow greedy? Like, oh I don’t know it’s just that night we just confessed to each other, and then the next minute we’re making love.” I pointed out. 

“I know what you’re saying. And actually just thinking about it yeah, it does sound like things were rushed. But I didn’t plan to do ‘it’ neither did you. But it happened… and we can’t change that fact.” He sincerely stated. I nodded understanding and knew that I was going to regret what I was about to say, but, I had to. I knew that if things continued the way they were, we’d be in trouble and what we have left between us will be gone.

“Let’s stop. Let’s pretend that this was a phase. That this is because we are growing hormonal teenagers.” I implied. His eyes widened and narrowed in on me. He grabbed my shoulders.

“No, Jinah don’t act like this!” He cried as he searched my eyes. I encircled my hands around his wrists and pulled his hands off my shoulders.

“It wasn’t a suggestion Myungsoo. It’s the best, for the both of us. We’ll go on as if this never happened - ”   

“No, no, please don’t say that.” He begged. I supposed it was one of those moments where the both of us had that lump in our throats, with threatening tears.

“As if this was a dream. Things will go back to the way they were.” I continued. But questioned if things will actually go back to how I imagined. It’s not what I want, what he wants, but this choice had to be made for the better. 

“Back to the way things were? What, me suffering by your side despising you, hating you so much because I love you? While you step over me like I’m a pushover? Do you want it like that? ” He asked outraged as tears tumbled uncontrollable down his precious face. 

“You weren’t the only one suffering like that!” I yelled back. He wiped his face on the back of his hand.

“Then how can you say such a thing? Do you know how it felt when I learnt that somewhere in that stubborn heart of yours there was already a place for me?” He questioned.

 Don’t show affection now Jinah, you have to let him go.

“Goodbye Myungsoo.” I coldly said before I stiffly ran away and into the girl’s bathroom. I locked myself into a cubicle and cried my heart out.

I’m good at this aren’t I? Abandoning my feelings. 

***

“What!?” I angrily whispered. 

“Myungsoo looks … hurt? He keeps glancing at you. Did something happen?” Hyorin asked.

“I stopped it.” I said simply. My minions looked at each other.

“You did the right thing you know. He should understand.” Bora said as she put a comforting hand on my wrist.

School finished and I stormed out of class only to be stopped in my tracks. 

“Excuse you for being so disrespectful. Who do you think you are to block our way?” I forced myself to squawk. Myungsoo . . .  ani . . . my step-peasant stood before us like a statue. Good Jinah, this will become a habit again, things will go back to normal.

“Appa’s in the car.” He quietly advised like he was too hurt to speak to me. 

“Are you for real? Puh-lease as if I’d go home with you.” I fake laughed. I shoved him aside and strutted past him with my minions.

“You’ve really thrown away what he had haven’t you?” He called out. I didn’t bother turning around so I just gave him the ‘ok’ sign. 

***

“Hey honey how was your day?” Umma asked as I set my bag down and sat at the table for dinner. 

“The same.” I said simply. It was a dream Jinah, your relationship with your step-peasant never happened. I’ve done it before, I can do it again. I reminded myself.   

“And yours?” She asked my hot . . . excuse me . . . she asked my step-peasant. I caught his glance and showed him a sarcastic smile as I kicked his leg under the table. 

“The usual.” He replied. Dinner was like how it was back then, and after it I stormed up into my room wasting time like I usually did.

“Jinah shower!” Umma ordered. I groaned out of annoyance. I wasn’t bothered getting off my laptop, getting out of my seat, walking to my draws to get what I need, closing my draw then walking to my door, etcetera etcetera. Too much work. 

But much to my dismay, I ended up dragging myself into the bathroom two hours later. 

Shower time finished and as I was drying myself the door burst open. I yelped and covered myself with my towel as Myungsoo just strode into the bathroom.

“Um excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?” I asked in disbelief. Hellooo girl over here?!

“Umma asked me to have a shower.” He said simply as he started to strip. He is so hot, I thought before I screwed my head on straight. 

“Are you in your right mind? You can’t just barge in here while I’m and start stripping in front of me! ARE YOU CRAZY?!” I yelled like a crazy mad women. Two pairs of running footsteps made their way to the scene. Umma and Appa gasped as they saw me covering my lady parts with a towel and the half- Myungsoo.

“What is going on here?” Appa asked shocked at what he saw.

“No I’m not crazy. There’s nothing I haven’t seen.” Myungsoo said ignoring them, as he slammed the door shut in front of their bewildered faces. Unbelievable! Is this seriously going on now?

“Great, now this great! You’ve just made the situation worse! Just what is your problem?” I asked making sure I was fully covered. A smirk played up on his lips.

“My problem? I don’t have a problem. But obviously you do with me.” He said. I scoffed and took a daring step towards him.

“Okay then. Yes I do! What are you playing at? What are you trying to accomplish by doing this? Why? I broke your heart is that what this is? Fine! It was never real in the first place; I toyed with you for fun. Is that what you wanted to hear?” I argued keeping my voice low to prevent the potential eavesdroppers outside the door.  

“Is it true?” He asked looking at me with those sincere eyes. I gulped and leaned forward.

“You’re my brother, no, my step-brother, know your place.” I sternly said and stormed out of the bathroom knocking over our parents that had an ear to the door.

I kept telling myself that the relationship with Myungsoo was a phase and that he is my brother- my step peasant that is pushover material. I had to box away the memories we shared as well as my feelings. Because what happened today, it scared me thinking that that may as well have been the start to a life that is such a torturous hell. And because I love him, I don’t want to let that happen to him.  

I am so, so, so, sorry like really sorry I havn't updated in like 2 months. I don't really have a excuse but I had exams and this was the last term of school for the year so it was busy.

Anyways I hoped you like the chapter, it'll be bright again soon. ^^