2/2
Wish List2/2: Wish List
Chanyeol came back after a week.
Baekhyun was, of course, livid. He was sitting in the classroom, listening to Kyungsoo and Jongin's tales from when they tried ghost-hunting a few nights ago. Chanyeol had casually greeted them as soon as he walked in, attempting to place a kiss on Baekhyun's cheek before sliding into his seat. Attempting. Baekhyun had evaded him, spitting out a ' off' before turning to the blackboard, ignoring Chanyeol altogether. Chanyeol looked hurt, but Kyungsoo could only shake his head in disappointment.
"You were gone for a week and you couldn't even call? Chanyeol." Kyungsoo said his name in a reprimanding tone, making him feel like a kid who stole candy from another kid.
"I had my reasons. I would never ignore or not call Baekhyun just because I felt like it." Chanyeol's voice dropped to a whisper as soon as their teacher walked in.
"Then tell him, not me. You better have a good reason." Kyungsoo whispered back, and as Chanyeol turned to Baekhyun, the latter only huffed and turned away, still giving him the cold shoulder. The taller turned to Kyungsoo, who shrugged before turning back to the teacher as well. "He had the worst week, you know, and you weren't even there for him."
"Why? Wait, what happened?"
"University applications, plus, his mom fell sick with the flu. She's fine now, though." Kyungsoo supplied calmly.
"...I didn't know."
"Of course, you didn't. You weren't here." It was Baekhyun who answered this time, not even turning to Chanyeol.
Chanyeol could only sigh in response, throwing his short boyfriend one last look before burying his own face in his arms, mumbling to himself. "I had my reasons..."
As soon as classes ended, Baekhyun literally ran out of their room, leaving his friends and boyfriend behind. He really wasn't playing hard to get; he was just pissed off to the high heavens, and as much as he wanted to hug and cuddle the life out of Chanyeol, he held back. He didn't want to talk to Chanyeol while he was mad as . Plus, he was still on edge from all the university applications he had just submitted.
Arriving at his bicycle, he hurriedly slung his bag across his body, pulled out his keys and crouched down as he started unlocking the chains around his ride home. It wasn't until a large shadow loomed over him and a pair of arms wrapped around his waist from the back that he stopped fumbling with the chains. Releasing a groan that was a mix between relief and frustration, he kept his eyes trained on one of the wheels on his bike, refusing to look at Chanyeol.
"I'm still mad at you." Baekhyun grumbled, and Chanyeol nuzzling the back of his neck was the response he got, mumbled words of apology coming soon after. He fought the urge to laugh because the action was tickling him.
"I'm sorry, Baek, really. I can explain."
"That is so cliche, Park." Baekhyun could feel the pout in Chanyeol's voice as the latter pulled away, abruptly turning him around and causing him to fall on his backside. Baekhyun hissed in pain. "Hey, careful! That hurts."
"What's with the 'Park'?" Chanyeol demanded, hands on Baekhyun's hips. Baekhyun shrugged, turning away and trying not to let the students staring at them get the better of him.
"Like I said, I'm still mad at you. You ing disappeared without telling me anything."
"Like I said, I'm sorry. I had my reasons."
"Which are?"
"I...that's beside the point, Baek. Look, I'm sorry, Really."
"Fine. But I'm still pissed, Park."
"Baekhyun."
"Park."
"Stop being so difficult, Baek, please."
"I'm not the one who disappea--
Baekhyun's words were cut off by Chanyeol's lips. It was kind of awkward and it hurt a little, what with Chanyeol literally crashing his mouth against Baekhyun's, but the sensation of having those annoyingly plump lips moving against him was enough to drain all the anger that Baekhyun was feeling. He was aware of a few girls behind them squealing in surprise at the sudden display of affection, but his mind quickly tuned them out as Chanyeol's hand moved from his hip to the back of his neck, pulling him closer. Baekhyun didn't know what to do.
Chanyeol pulled away after a few moments, his cheeks flushed and his brows furrowed in some kind of an embarrassed determination. Baekhyun would bet his life-savings that he was probably redder than Chanyeol and a tomato combined. The taller of the two moved his hand to cup Baekhyun's cheek, thumb brushing Baekhyun's lower lip. Baekhyun was then reminded that his mouth was still hanging open. He quickly closed them, and Chanyeol smiled.
"I'm sorry, okay? I missed you." Baekhyun wasn't sure, but somehow, Chanyeol's voice sounded deeper than usual. He felt his face heating up more before he looked down, biting his lower lip.
"...that was our first kiss, you know?" He commented randomly, and Chanyeol chuckled softly.
"I know."
"...it wasn't even romantic." Baekhyun pouted, and Chanyeol leaned in to kiss him on the cheek before replying.
"It's the thought that counts, Baek." Chanyeol chuckled, standing up and pulling Baekhyun along with him. Baekhyun kept looking away even when he stepped closer to Chanyeol, linking their hands together and resting his forehead against the other's shoulder.
"Fine, I forgive you, you giant idiot."
Chanyeol responded by slinging an arm around Baekhyun's shoulder, pulling him in for a hug and burying his face on Baekhyun's hair. Baekhyun mentally cringed because Chanyeol was practically sniffing him and he wasn't sure if he still smelled nice. It has been a whole day, already, and summer wasn't kind. Trying to keep his mind off the undesirable thought, he scoffed before pushing Chanyeol away.
"Don't think that you can get out of our problems with a simple kiss, Chanyeol." He stuck his tongue out before turning back to his bike.
"I know, I know. Maybe next time, if we fight again, we'll have make-up se--
"Hold that thought, ert." Baekhyun laughed, and as he sat on his bike, he waited for Chanyeol as he sat himself down on the small passenger seat, long arms wrapping around a slim waist as they rode back home.
Meanwhile, back in their classroom, Kyungsoo and Jongin held a note in their hand. Both had grim looks on their faces, and Jongin was on the verge of crying. Kyungsoo was then obliged to be the one to put on a strong front, smacking his boyfriend on the back of the head before folding the note in half, slipping it into his pant pocket.
"Jongin, stop crying, damn it."
"But, Kyungsoo...you read the note from Chanyeol...he's...." Jongin looked away, sniffling and taking deep breaths to calm himself.
"I know."
"...why are you being so indifferent about this? Aren't you the least bit affected?" Jongin snapped at the smaller guy, and Kyungsoo sighed deeply before turning to Jongin.
"I'm hurting as much as you are, but I can't let that get me down. If you're going to be a baby about this and cry, then by all means, do so, but you can count me out. I need to be strong not only for Chanyeol, but also for Baekhyun. Because that's what friends do: stick with each other through and crap."
After a considerable silence, Kyungsoo is surprised when Jongin reaches out, handkerchief in hand as he wiped Kyungsoo's face. Jongin's lips are pressed into a thin line, and it's not until Jongin talks that Kyungsoo finally understands his actions.
"I know, but you don't have to hide your feelings when you're with me. You can cry all you want, I won't judge." And so, Kyungsoo let his brave front crumble, melting into Jongin's touch and letting the gravity of the situation sink in.
"Hey, Chanyeol? You've never told me but...what are you going to do after we graduate high school?"
Baekhyun turns his head to the side as Chanyeol continued tuning his guitar. They're in the taller boy's room, spending a quiet Saturday with each other. After days of studying and studying, Baekhyun rewarded himself with a long-awaited day with Chanyeol. Turning over onto his stomach, Baekhyun propped his elbows on Chanyeol's bed, swinging his legs in the air as Chanyeol shrugged at his question.
"I don't know. I feel like college isn't my thing, so I guess I'll be staying here and help Pops with his business." Chanyeol's voice sounded strained, really, but Baekhyun brushed it off.
"Hmm. What if...Let's just say I get accepted into that university overseas." Baekhyun sat up, legs folded underneath him and Chanyeol's pillow wedged between his arms. Chanyeol stopped tuning to look up at Baekhyun, an unreadable expression on his face.
"The one that you really want?"
"Yeah, that one. Say I got accepted, and I'd have to go and live there for, uh, I don't know, four years, maybe? Will we be okay?" Baekhyun felt his heart constrict at the question, already imagining how lonely it would be to be miles and miles away from the person he loved.
"What do you think?" Chanyeol folded his arms over the body of the guitar, observing Baekhyun. The latter hummed in deep thought, playing with his hands before shrugging unsurely.
"I don't know. I've never really been in a relationship, much less a long-distance one. You're the first, just so you know." Baekhyun grinned sheepishly, and Chanyeol chuckled softly before standing up from his chair and sitting beside Baekhyun on the bed, guitar still in his hands.
"If it makes you feel better, you're my first, too. And...if we do get into that situation, don't worry. We'll make it work. I promise." Chanyeol grinned at Baekhyun, bumping their shoulders together. Baekhyun smiled, feeling considerably better.
"Of course, we will! There's always the internet." Baekhyun leans his head on Chanyeol's shoulder as the other started preparing to play. Positioning his hands on the fret bars, he softly plucked the strings, and Baekhyun imitated the note by humming.
This was one of the things they always did when they were together: Chanyeol played the guitar, and Baekhyun sang. Baekhyun had a heavenly voice, and if he didn't dream of becoming a teacher just like his mother, he would have tried out in one of those agencies back at the city. The way Chanyeol played the guitar represented who he was; it had a reckless nature to it, and yet, it was also soft and caring. It matched Baekhyun's voice well, and they never really said it out loud, but whenever they performed together, it felt like they just fell more and more, understanding things about each other that only music can convey.
Baekhyun felt his world stop when Chanyeol tripped on a perfectly flat surface one boring weekend.
The hands of time seemed to have stilled as he watched Jongin and Kyungsoo hurrying to Chanyeol's limp body, a horrifying amount of blood pooling at the giant's head. He couldn't hear anything, couldn't process anything, couldn't feel anything as the alarming dark colour of the blood seared into his vision, the long strands of Chanyeol's hair clumping together. Baekhyun only snapped back to his senses when Kyungsoo pulled him, shouting at him to do something and to get his together. In response, he quickly fished out his phone, calling for an ambulance.
The white vehicle soon came, and they all hurried into the car. The medics moved with practiced speed, attaching tubes and cleaning wounds. Kyungsoo, Jongin and Baekhyun just sat in the corner, hands linked together as they watched Chanyeol's pale face remain unmoving. The only sign that Chanyeol was still alive were his lips parted open as he breathed with a little difficulty, and his fingers twitched from time to time.
They soon arrived at the hospital. Chanyeol was taken to the emergency room, and Kyungsoo and Jongin waited in the lobby. Park Taejoon, Chanyeol's father, soon arrived to wait with them, but Baekhyun didn't have the heart to do the same as the reality of the situation sunk in, so he spent his waiting time in the nearby convenience store, stuffing his face with chocolate ice cream to try and ease himself into a better mood. It didn't work.
"I'm sorry I worried you."
Baekhyun could only stare blankly at his boyfriend. There was a gauze covering half his forehead, and he looked unusual in the drab setting of the single hospital room that he was in. Baekhyun gripped the plastic bag from the convenience store tightly in his hands, pressing his lips into a thin line as Chanyeol's image burned onto his mind. It didn't look right seeing the giant sitting on a boring hospital bed and looking worn out after a day of lying perfectly unconscious. Walking closer, he pulled a chair closer to the bed and occupied it, placing the plastic bag on the table and looking intently at the taller boy. The latter fidgeted in his spot before smiling sheepishly at him.
"They did three stitches." Chanyeol pointed at the gauze on his forehead, and Baekhyun frowned, grabbing Chanyeol by the wrist and linking their hands together.
"You tripped." He said lamely, and Chanyeol shrugged his shoulders in response.
"...I know. I'm clumsy."
"You just tripped, Chanyeol. And you got three stitches?" Baekhyun repeated, hearing the absurdity in his words. It really was, if you think about it.
"Well, I hit my head, so that's no surpris--
"You didn't even stop your fall. You just...fell like a ing log, Yeol, it was so weird. Like...you just completely shut off in those few seconds." Baekhyun cut in, and he felt Chanyeol's grip tighten before relaxing again, a tired smile finding its way onto the taller male's face.
"Don't think too much, Baek, it's nothing."
Somehow, Baekhyun couldn't believe that, but seeing the look on Chanyeol's face made him relent. Taking the plastic bag, he took out some drinks and snacks that made Chanyeol smile, and soon, Baekhyun forgot the reason for his worry.
Halfway into the school year, the senior students of Sokcho High School were all busy with university applications. Jongin, with his dancing skills, got into a performing arts school at the city. Kyungsoo, Chanyeol and Baekhyun threw a party for him during a free weekend, congratulating him on his acceptance. Kyungsoo decided not to go to the city for college, opting for the local culinary school in their town. Chanyeol, like what he had originally planned, didn't even apply for any university. Taejoon brought Chanyeol along to his business endeavours whenever he could, training the younger male in the family business' ways. Baekhyun, much to his and everyone's joy, passed his dream school's entrance exam, even getting into the scholarship program. Much like what they did with Jongin, they threw Baekhyun a congratulatory party.
"Congratulations, Baekhyunnie! I knew you could do it." Chanyeol wrapped his long arms around Baekhyun's waist from the back, nuzzling his neck and eliciting a contented sigh from the shorter male. Linking their hands together, Baekhyun leaned back and nestled himself more snugly in Chanyeol's arms, his back pressed against the other's chest.
"Thank you for believing in me, giant." Baekhyun turned his head to the side and looked up, cheek brushing against Chanyeol's chin.
"That's my job. I'm so proud of you, baby." Chanyeol whispered, and Baekhyun blushed at the nickname. Turning around, Baekhyun cupped Chanyeol's face and placed a light kiss on his lips. As he pulled away, Chanyeol couldn't stop an airy laugh from escaping his lips. "Second."
"Second? What?" Baekhyun tilted his head curiously, and Chanyeol shrugged, smirking smugly.
"That's our second kiss, you know."
"Oh my god, Chanyeol, don't count. It's embarrassing." Baekhyun laughed, pinching Chanyeol's cheeks and ignoring the gagging sounds that Jongin was making in the background.
"Why not? I want to treasure and memorize each moment I have with you." Chanyeol nudged Baekhyun's forehead with his nose much like what a dog would to his pup, and Baekhyun couldn't help but feel his heart skip a beat at the cheesiness and romance of it all. Then, in a really hushed voice, as if Chanyeol didn't really mean to say it out loud, he added: "It's all that I have."
Baekhyun looked at Chanyeol questioningly, surprised at the randomly inserted sad thought. "Yeollie, are you okay?"
Chanyeol shrugged before pulling away, smiling at him like nothing was wrong. Pulling him towards the table where Jongin and Kyungsoo were stuffing their faces with food made by Mrs. Byun, he smiled cheekily at Baekhyun. "Of course, I am. My boyfriend just passed his dream school in Tokyo! Why wouldn't I be okay?"
Shrugging his worries off, he sighed in defeat before taking a seat next to Kyungsoo, grabbing the last piece of chicken leg and sticking his tongue out before taking a bite. All the while, Chanyeol just sat in his own seat quietly, watching Baekhyun laugh at some lame joke that Kyungsoo must have come up with, considering how animatedly the shorter boy was gesturing with his hands. A tap on the shoulder got his attention, and he turned to Jongin, who had a serious look on his face.
"Hey, man...are you going to tell him?"
Chanyeol took one look at Baekhyun's smiling face, and he shook his head slowly, taking a glass from the table randomly and shrugging his shoulders at Jongin. "Who am I to ruin his happiness?"
Jongin wanted to punch Chanyeol in the jugular for being too dramatic. Mustering up his self-control to not give in to the temptation, he gripped Chanyeol by the shoulder and turned him abruptly. "What you're doing is ruining his happiness already, Chanyeol. How do you think he'll feel when he finds out too late?"
"That time will come, okay, but for now...I just want to see him smile." Chanyeol mumbled quietly, tipping the glass to his lips and chuckling as Baekhyun made some weird reaction.
Jongin saw the look of total content on Chanyeol's face, and he couldn't bring himself to argue anymore. If that's what his friend decided on, then they'll just go along with it.
After graduation, Jongin was the first of the four to leave Sokcho. Baekhyun and Chanyeol bid their goodbyes and left Kyungsoo alone with his boyfriend on the platform so that they could share an intimate moment together. The two would have to resort to phone calls and Skype video calls to see each other on a regular basis, as the train ticket from Seoul to Sokcho and vice versa was pretty expensive for students depending on measly allowances.
Baekhyun sat on a bench outside the train station, fanning his face from the burning rays of the sun and the unforgiving humid heat of summer. Chanyeol had gone to the convenience store to buy them popsicle sticks, and he soon came back carrying a plastic bag. Kyungsoo also came out at the same time. Reaching the two smaller males, Chanyeol reached into the bag and got out one strawberry popsicle stick. He held it out to Baekhyun, but the latter frowned.
"Uhm. Chanyeol, I'm over here. Who are you handing it to?"
Both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo stiffened. Indeed, Chanyeol's aim was a little off. He was facing Baekhyun, but his arm was pointing somewhere else. Quick to react, Kyungsoo laughed a little too loudly, going out of his way and taking the popsicle stick instead. Baekhyun threw them confused looks, and Kyungsoo waved him off.
"He was just ing around, Baek! You know, testing if you're delirious or not from the heat yet." Kyungsoo pushed the popsicle stick into Baekhyun's hands, and got his own share from the plastic bag himself. All the while, Chanyeol just stayed quiet.
Baekhyun nodded his head before peeling his popsicle bar's cover, totally focused on it. Kyungsoo took the chance to look at Chanyeol reproachfully, sending a silent message to the taller male. Chanyeol only shook his head before taking the seat next to his boyfriend, engaging him in a random conversation.
Kyungsoo could only watch in silence, forgetting his own popsicle bar.
The night before Baekhyun's departure for Tokyo, he spent the night over at Chanyeol's. The couple, of course, shared the same bed. Feeling a sudden considerable loss of heat, Baekhyun woke up in the middle of the night, alone. As if to make sure of the surprising fact, he pressed his hands on the space that Chanyeol had occupied. It was still a little warm. Shrugging it off as his boyfriend going on a bathroom break, he suddenly felt a little thirsty. He decided to look for Chanyeol after getting himself a cup of water.
Not wanting to disturb the peace and quiet, he tiptoed to the kitchen of the Park's household. However, what surprised him was the glow of the dim lighting that came from the living room two doors down from the kitchen. He really wasn't going to eavesdrop, but as soon as he heard the hushed whispers coming from the living room, he couldn't help it anymore, especially when he heard his own name being mentioned.
"Pops, I know. Just...give me more time. I don't want Baekhyun to know."
"Chanyeol, you're only hurting yourself. Eventually, you'll hurt him, too. You have to tell him."
"Dad, I can't. If I do...I know that guy and what he's capable of. I don't want to tell him yet."
"He's leaving tomorrow!"
"Pops, keep your voice down. And I know, okay? I know...that's why I don't want to tell him."
Baekhyun felt rude at having listened in on the conversation despite how ominous it sounded. He quickly went back to Chanyeol's room, forgetting his water break. Diving under the covers, he pulled it up over his head and soon, he heard Chanyeol's light footsteps getting closer. The door opened, and the bed dipped down as Chanyeol's weight fell on it. A pair of arms wrapped around him, and he couldn't bear to pull down the cover and look Chanyeol in the eyes. When Chanyeol pulled him in closer and a pair of lips pressed against his temple, he let his curiosity take the better of him.
"Chanyeol...?" He whispered into the night, and after a while, Chanyeol hummed in response.
"Hmm?" His hold around Baekhyun tightened, and he took a deep breath, as if he was trying to calm himself down.
Baekhyun finally pulled the blanket down, revealing his brown orbs staring curiously at Chanyeol. Gathering up his courage, he poked one hand out from under the blanket and touched Chanyeol's cheek. "You're not keeping anything from me, are you?"
Chanyeol's jaw tightened, and he just kept on staring at Baekhyun for a while, not answering. Baekhyun felt intimidated under the hard stare, and he was about to tell Chanyeol to ignore everything when Chanyeol's features softened, his eyes closing as he pressed his forehead against Baekhyun's.
"Of course not. Why would you think that?"
"...nothing. F-forget I asked. Just...I just want you to know that if you have something troubling you, I'm always here to listen. I'll hapkido the out of anyone who's hurting you, babe, I promise." Baekhyun said, determination lacing his words and not even noticing his little slip of the tongue--in the form of 'babe'.
Chanyeol laughed in response, burying his face against Baekhyun's shoulder. "Go to sleep, Baek."
Before Baekhyun fell asleep, he felt his sleeve getting soaked by something warm. It's not until sleep is taking him that he realizes that his boyfriend's crying, shoulders shaking with each restrained sob. Baekhyun chose not to talk about it, feeling that Chanyeol wouldn't want a low moment in his life to become a topic between the two of them.
That night, Baekhyun fell asleep listening to the faint sobs of Chanyeol, his heart breaking with each sound.
"So, I guess this is it, city boy. Good luck out there, okay?"
Kyungsoo clapped Baekhyun on the shoulder good-naturedly, fighting back tears as he said his goodbyes to the boy he used to call 'city boy'. Mrs. Byun and Mr. Byun hugged him while Chanyeol stood beside him, their hands linked together as Baekhyun drowned in his parents' arms. Afterwards, he ruffled Kyungsoo's hair, making the shorter boy scowl.
"Yah, Kyungsoo-yah, why are you crying? You didn't even cry when Jongin left."
"I just...I'm sorry." Kyungsoo sniffled, wiping his tears with his sleeves and glancing at Chanyeol.
"Don't mind him, Baek, you're like...his first best friend. His only best friend, so he's already missing you." Chanyeol teased, and Kyungsoo jabbed him on the shoulder in response.
"Aww. You guys are making me cry. Don't worry, I'll go home every holiday, and I'll be online on Skype whenever I get the chance." Baekhyun hugged Kyungsoo, and Kyungsoo squeezed him. Patting his cheeks, he left with Mrs. Byun and Mr. Byun, leaving Baekhyun and Chanyeol alone.
"I'll wait for you outside, Chanyeol." Kyungsoo reminded him, and Chanyeol nodded.
Baekhyun watched his family's and Kyungsoo's retreating figures, and the sad reality of the situation started sinking in. He was leaving for Tokyo to study in his dream school for, hopefully, four years only if he doesn't flunk any class. He was going to start living independently and probably find part-time jobs to add to the allowance that the school gave him. The only people who finally mattered were staying behind. His best friend, his boyfriend, his family-- he closed his eyes and massaged them, willing the tears to go away. A warm hand on his cheek had him releasing a hitched sob.
"You can cry, Baek. I won't judge, and you'll have my shoulder to cry on. Come here." Chanyeol whispered, pulling the smaller male into his arms.
Baekhyun let the tears fall, clutching Chanyeol's jacket into his fingers as he hid his face on Chanyeol's chest. Strong arms circled around his back, and he had never felt more secure and protected in his life. Chanyeol caressed his hair, squeezed him, and whispered hushed sweet nothings into his ear, making him feel infinitely better. Pulling away, he looked up and sniffled, trying his best to smile at his boyfriend.
"Th-thank you, Chanyeol..." He stood on his tiptoes and planted a quick kiss on Chanyeol's lips. The latter smiled.
"Third."
"...are you counting our kisses again, oh my God." Baekhyun let out a giggle, and Chanyeol grinned triumphantly.
"You laughed! That's good. I didn't want you crying as you leave." Chanyeol leaned down before Baekhyun could reply, catching his lips in a kiss more heated and romantic compared to the one that Baekhyun had initiated. They pulled away, ignoring everyone around them. Blushing, Baekhyun bit his lips before looking away.
"Fourth." Baekhyun mumbled, and Chanyeol laughed, ruffling Baekhyun's hair.
"See? It's fun counting them. Makes you anticipate the next one. I'm sure we'll reach more than a hundred kisses." Chanyeol let go of Baekhyun before cupping his face, squeezing his cheeks. "Good luck out there, okay?"
And as if on cue, Baekhyun's flight was being announced over the speaker, calling the passengers to start boarding the plane. With a heavy but considerably lighter heart, Baekhyun placed one last kiss on Chanyeol's lips before scurrying away, not turning back to avoid Chanyeol seeing his fresh tears.
"Fifth." Chanyeol whispered into the air sadly, a wistful smile on his face. He just stood there until he saw the status of Baekhyun's flight change to Departing. He just stared at the board until he felt someone tugging on his arm. Looking back, he saw Kyungsoo's puffy eyes watching him carefully.
"Are...are you okay?" He asked, voice cracking.
Chanyeol nodded, although deep down, he already yearned for Baekhyun's smile. Kyungsoo held him gently by the wrist and pulled him out of the airport, helping him walk. The cold wind hit them as the automatic doors slid open.
"...let's go to the doctor, Chanyeol." Kyungsoo may or may not have sobbed, Chanyeol wasn't sure. He was too busy staring at his watch, mentally counting the time that he has left with Baekhyun.
Baekhyun's first week in Tokyo wasn't easy. He understood nothing, he didn't speak the language, and his classmates weren't nice, if not all. Thankfully, there was also another Korean in the dorm that he was staying at. His name was Kim Jongdae, and he was the one who welcomed Baekhyun into Tokyo. He was also the one who told him about a ramen shop in Harajuku in need of new staff members. They both applied, and they got in. They worked on the weekends during their days off from class. The only time that Baekhyun got the chance to go online was during his third week, after he had settled everything.
The first face that popped on the screen was Kyungsoo, who Mrs. Byun was fighting against for screen exposure. Baekhyun felt the tears his eyes as he listened to the friendly banter that was going on. Kyungsoo grinned at him, and his mother looked worried.
"Baekhyunnie! You're finally online! We were so worried." Mrs. Byun said, and Baekhyun waved him off.
"I'm fine, mom. I had trouble at first, but Jongdae helped me. He's a Korean, too, and he's studying in the same university as me. We're in different departments, but we're good." Baekhyun was about to ask another question when Kyungsoo cut him off.
"How's the food there? I really want to taste authentic Japanese food. They say it's not the same with Korean food."
"It's...okay. I miss mom's kimchi, though. I got a part-time job at this ramen shop in Harajuku. They pay me well, and I'm slowly saving money so that I can buy a ticket when it's a holiday. I already miss you guys."
"Aww, we miss you, too, Baekkie." Kyungsoo teased, and Baekhyun laughed. Waving his hand dismissively, he looked at the screen again.
"By the way...where's Chanyeol? I haven't seen him...and this is his Skype account you're using." Baekhyun commented, and Kyungsoo's smile faltered. Mrs. Byun suddenly left the screen.
"Chanyeol...well, he's, uhm, out with his dad on a business trip. He told me his password so that I could contact you anytime I wanted." Kyungsoo looked uncomfortable, and Baekhyun was about to question it until his phone rang. Jongdae was on the other end, and the place that they worked at was in need of extra hands. Explaining the situation to Kyungsoo quickly, the call ended and he left his dorm, hurrying to Harajuku.
Meanwhile, back in Korea, Kyungsoo closed the laptop solemnly. Turning back, he looked at Chanyeol gravely. The latter was smiling, although a little forced.
"You heard him. He's fine...he's looking for you." Kyungsoo said shakily, his fists clenching by his sides.
"I miss him."
"...why don't you just tell him? He'll come right back, he'll take care of you...you'll get to spend more time with him. Park Chanyeol, stop ing torturing yourself!" Kyungsoo let the tears fall as he watched Chanyeol stand up shakily from the hospital bed. He was already having trouble using his limbs.
Chanyeol only smiled, and the next thing that happened surprised him and Mrs. Byun. Kyungsoo strode up to him and punched him on the jaw. It stung, but the weight of the reality that he had been running away from hurt more as it pushed down on him. Pressing his palm against his jaw, he stared at the floor before finally letting his walls crumble down, a fresh wave of tears finally crashing down.
"I don't want to die..."
Baekhyun felt bad for not going back to Korea for a year. It wasn't his fault, though. Requirements in university, sudden financial problems, more school requirements, projects, seminars, volunteer works, more part-time jobs with Jongdae-- he had his hands full and he couldn't even sit down and look at his inbox. He was sure that Chanyeol had sent him mails, as stated by Kyungsoo whenever the latter called.
He finally had a day free, surprisingly. It was a holiday at his university and it was also his day-off at his part-time job for that day. Sitting down in his single-room unit at the dorm, he brought out his laptop and turned it on. While waiting for the system to start up and load, he got up and prepared some cup noodles. Going back, he quickly opened his inbox. He had at least fifty messages, all of them from Chanyeol.
Now, Chanyeol did his letters in a very special way. First, he wrote on a real paper, and then scanned it so that his letter would be converted to an image file. Attaching the file to his mail for Baekhyun, he'd send it that way. In his words on his first letter that Baekhyun had managed to read before his hectic life began, it was meant to conserve the original meaning and feeling of letters. Baekhyun had laughed, saying what a cheesy and romantic person he was.
He read through the messages, laughing and feeling sad all at the same time. As he progressed through the letters, he felt bad for not having the time to reply. Chanyeol seemed to be having fun helping his dad. Kyungsoo was coming up with random recipes and using Chanyeol as his guinea pig. Oh, how Baekhyun badly wanted to be there to witness it all.
However, as he came nearer and nearer to the latest messages, he noticed something. Chanyeol's writing seemed to grow larger, like a kid's, and it got messier with each letter. Baekhyun had to squint sometimes to read the hangul letters clearly. Then, Chanyeol's last message, sent to him a few days ago, was no longer like the scanned images that he liked to make. It was just an ordinary, standard e-mail, asking him how he was and wishing him good luck. Just that. The last message was from Kyungsoo, and it only contained three words: Chanyeol needs you.
Confused, he dialled Kyungsoo's number, but the line just went to voice mail. He also tried Chanyeol's, and his parents' even, but nobody answered. Feeling worried and helpless, it's an understatement to say that Baekhyun couldn't sleep that night.
"Irasshaimase!"
Baekhyun looked up from his table to see Jongdae greeting a group of boys around his age as they entered the small space of their ramen shop. He greeted along, going back to the counter and wiping the island seeing as the new customers were heading there. Too focused on his job, he didn't notice one boy from the group sit in front of him.
"Oh, I see you're doing well, Byunbaek."
At the sudden use of his Korean native tongue, Baekhyun's head snapped up, and he squealed a little too loudly when he saw Jongin sitting in front of him, smiling like the smug bastard that he was. Forgetting his job, he leaned over and jabbed Jongin on the shoulder, grinning at him.
"Jongin! What are you doing here? Man, it's so good to see you! It's so refreshing to hear somebody else aside from Jongdae speaking in Korean." Baekhyun laughed, and Jongin smiled at him, jerking his thumb towards the group that came in earlier.
"I'm with them. We just came back from a dance competition, and I thought I'd drop by."
"How'd you know I'd be here? I don't think I've ever mentioned to you where I work." Baekhyun habitually pushed a menu towards Jongin, telling him to order something.
"Kyungsoo told me." Jongin pointed at a random ramen, and Baekhyun nodded before telling the cook and going back directly to Jongin.
"Oh? When did you last talk to him?"
"Just a few days ago, right before I left Seoul."
"Oh...I haven't talked to them for a while. I've been busy. Like, really busy." Baekhyun sighed deeply, and Jongin clapped him on the shoulder.
"Man, you should try and find more time for them, especially Chanyeol. I hope he's getting better..." Jongin trailed off, and Baekhyun cocked an eyebrow at him.
"Better? If you mean his job with his dad, sure! I've been reading his mails, and he says he's doing great." Baekhyun told him enthusiastically, and Jongin's smile dropped. Baekhyun looked back at him suspiciously, feeling something bad brewing. Trying to laugh it off, he leaned on the counter and tilted his head to the side. "Chanyeol's not sick, is he?"
At Jongin's silence, the playful smile on Baekhyun's face faltered. Straightening up, he walked around the counter and grabbed Jongin by the shoulders, gripping him tightly until the taller boy winced. Jongin looked away, acting beyond suspicious as Baekhyun understood his silence: Jongin had said something he shouldn't have, and it was related to Chanyeol.
"Jongin, what the are you hiding." It wasn't even a question as Baekhyun spat out his words darkly. Jongin's group stood up from their seats, seeing their friend seemingly in trouble, but Jongin held up a hand to them.
"Baek...I'm not supposed to tell...I made a promise."
"Well, promises are made to be ing broken."
"Baek, don't make me do this."
"Kim ing Jongin, I swear to God, if you don't tell me right this instant what in the actual ing hell is wrong with my Chanyeol, I will cut off your balls and hand deliver it to Kyungsoo mysel--
"Chanyeol's sick."
"Sick with what?! The ing flu--
"He's dying, Baekhyun."
Baekhyun was aware of the uncomfortable silence that fell on the whole restaurant. He was aware of his fingers loosening the tight grip on Jongin's jacket. He was aware of Jongin shaking him gently, asking if he was okay. He was aware what Jongin's words meant.
He wasn't aware, though, that Chanyeol was dying.
It felt like a slap to his face. A painful slap from Kyungsoo, just like that one time when Chanyeol thought he was cheating on him. It felt like a strong punch to his gut. A strong punch to his gut just like that one time in grade school when the school bully beat him up, thinking he was a weak kid.
"Baekhyun? Baek, are you--
"Since when, Jongin? Since...s-since when...?"
Jongin looked skeptical to answer at first, but he sighed, raking his fingers through his hair before taking Baekhyun's hands into his own and squeezing them gently. The action made Baekhyun focus a little, getting him back down on Earth.
"Since...since that time he left for a week without saying anything." When Baekhyun remained silent, Jongin continued. "He went to a doctor with Taejoon-ahjussi."
"...am I the only one who doesn't know?"
Jongin nodded.
Baekhyun couldn't even cry, still not understanding anything. All that he knew was he took off his apron as he dashed out of the ramen shop, ignoring Jongin, Jongdae and his boss' calls for him to come back and calm down. He went back to his dorm, hastily packed his bags and bought a ticket to Sokcho. Luckily, it wasn't the peak season, so tickets were available. He hailed a cab to go to the airport, and as he sat in the cramped space of the vehicle, he felt light headed. He felt useless. All this time, Chanyeol had been hiding things from him. He noticed, but he always brushed it off. He knew there was something wrong, but he didn't even pay attention to it.
That night, Baekhyun went on the plane to Sokcho. He was going home, and suddenly, his university, jobs and dreams didn't matter anymore. All that mattered was Chanyeol.
Chanyeol needed him.
Kyungsoo knocked gently on the door, opening it carefully. In his hands was a bento box he had made just hours before he went to the hospital. Despite the many times that he had done this, he was still not used to seeing Chanyeol sitting on his bed quietly, not saying a word as he just stared out the window. Taking a deep breath, he put on a brave front as he occupied his usual seat beside the bed, placing the bento box on the attached table on the bed. Chanyeol turned to him, the corners of his lips twitching into a smile.
"I made your favourite, Chanyeol." Kyungsoo said in a singsong tone, opening the box and placing the chopsticks beside the box.
Chanyeol reached for the chopsticks shakily, and that's when Kyungsoo's smile faltered, his eyes instantly b with tears. It hurt him to see Chanyeol try even when they knew that it was hopeless. The latter grasped the chopsticks many times only to drop it back on the table, his fingers not cooperating with him, and yet, he still had a smile on his face. Chanyeol had been like this for quite a while now.
The first signs were him having trouble walking. He'd lose his balance randomly, and Kyungsoo or Taejoon would be there to catch him. The next were his inability to speak in a straight manner. Kyungsoo noticed it first since he was the one always with Chanyeol. Over time, Chanyeol stuttered, and in a few more weeks, Chanyeol was having trouble formulating two syllables. Kyungsoo had cried in the bathroom, not knowing what to do. The latest symptom was him losing the ability to walk. Kyungsoo had come into the room only to see Chanyeol sprawled on the ground, the taller crying silently.
"I-It....h-h-h-hur-ts...K-K-Kyung..." Chanyeol had stuttered, and Kyungsoo didn't have the heart to put up a brave front anymore.
Taking the chopsticks, Kyungsoo shook his head at Chanyeol.
"I'll do it. Come on, I'll feed yo--
"Yah, Park Chanyeol!!"
Kyungsoo turned to the door abruptly. Chanyeol took a litte more time in reacting, his head shakily turning to the door. His eyes widened, and Kyungsoo dropped his chopsticks as they saw who it was.
Baekhyun was standing in the doorway, looking livid and wild.
Baekhyun's bravado went down the drain as he took in the image in front of him. Chanyeol had tubes attached to his arms, and he looked thinner. He looked twitchy and lost, and Kyungsoo, who was sitting on the chair beside the bed, looked relieved and shocked at the same time. His eyes were puffy and red, probably from crying, and Baekhyun didn't know what to do.
"B-B-B-Bae--
"Baekhyun, let's talk outside." Kyungsoo cut Chanyeol, and Baekhyun didn't miss how Chanyeol looked like he was in pain as he tried talking, stuttering his name like a little kid.
"What? I just got here an--
"Byun Baekhyun, now." Kyungsoo pushed himself off the seat, ignoring the murderous glare that Baekhyun was giving him.
Once outside, Kyungsoo slammed the door shut and surprised Baekhyun by enveloping him in a bone crushing hug. Baekhyun dropped his duffel bag on the floor, arms awkwardly going around Kyungsoo.
"Baekhyun, I'm so glad you're here...I'm so g-glad...oh my god..." Kyungsoo pulled away to look at Baekhyun with a tearstained face. Baekhyun felt his heart constrict at the image.
"Jongin told me...what...what's happening...?"
Kyungsoo looked down as he grabbed Baekhyun's hand gently. He pulled him through the long hallway and into a door on the right. They went in, and a man not older than them was sitting on the desk, reading through his files. He looked tired, and as he looked up, Baekhyun noticed his red eyes. Had he been crying, too?
"Doc, this is Chanyeol's boyfriend." Kyungsoo started, and Baekhyun couldn't help but blush at the blunt introduction. He remained quiet, though. The doctor smiled before beckoning them over to the available seats in the room.
"I'm Chanyeol's doctor, Kim Junmyeon. It's a pleasure to meet you, Baekhyun-ah." Baekhyun looked at Kyungsoo curiously.
"Chanyeol wouldn't stop talking about you, Baek. He really missed you." Kyungsoo commented, and Baekhyun felt something sting his chest.
"I'm all for making friends and all that, but...Jongin told me that...Ch-Chanyeol's...dying. I don't get it. Just because he's in a hospital doesn't mean he's dy--
"He has spinocerebellar ataxia, Baekhyun." Junmyeon cut in softly, and Baekhyun frowned.
"I'm not a medical student. I don't know what that is, sir..." Baekhyun felt Kyungsoo's hand wrap around his, and something about the action was already making him cry.
"Spinocerebellar ataxia, or SCA, is a neurodegenerative genetic disorder. We're not sure who it came from, but unfortunately, it manifested in Chanyeol. This disorder targets the cerebellum of the brain which coordinates and regulates muscular activity. This disease is rare, where the cerebellum of the brain gradually deteriorates to the point where the patient can no longer walk, speak, write or eat. There is no known effective treatment or cure for it." Junmyeon explained, and suddenly, everything made sense to Baekhyun. Junmyeon continued. "In Chanyeol's case, the disorder is growing at a fast rate. It's surprising that he's lasted a year at the rate that rate, but...I-I hate to say this to you, but...he's got a week at most."
Baekhyun stared blankly at Junmyeon. Reality hit him full force like a train with broken brakes.
Park Chanyeol is dying, and he only has a week left to live.
"You just tripped, Chanyeol. And you got three stitches?" Baekhyun repeated, hearing the absurdity in his words. It really was, if you think about it.
"Well, I hit my head, so that's no surpris--
"You didn't even stop your fall. You just...fell like a ing log, Yeol, it was so weird. Like...you just completely shut off in those few seconds." Baekhyun cut in, and he felt Chanyeol's grip tighten before relaxing again, a tired smile finding its way onto the taller male's face.
"Don't think too much, Baek, it's nothing."
"It's not nothing, you idiot..." He whispered, voice cracking as a sob fought its way out.
"Baekhyun...B-Baekhyun...?" Kyungsoo squeezed his hand, and Baekhyun's tears fell as he shook his head.
"Why not? I want to treasure and memorize each moment I have with you." Chanyeol nudged Baekhyun's forehead with his nose much like what a dog would to his pup, and Baekhyun couldn't help but feel his heart skip a beat at the cheesiness and romance of it all. Then, in a really hushed voice, as if Chanyeol didn't really mean to say it out loud, he added: "It's all that I have."
Baekhyun looked at Chanyeol questioningly, surprised at the randomly inserted sad thought. "Yeollie, are you okay?"
Chanyeol shrugged before pulling away, smiling at him like nothing was wrong. Pulling him towards the table where Jongin and Kyungsoo were stuffing their faces with food made by Mrs. Byun, he smiled cheekily at Baekhyun. "Of course, I am. My boyfriend just passed his dream school in Tokyo! Why wouldn't I be okay?"
"You're not okay..." Baekhyun pulled his hand free from Kyungsoo's hold, covering his face as uncontrollable sobs shook his body.
"Uhm. Chanyeol, I'm over here. Who are you handing it to?"
Both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo stiffened. Indeed, Chanyeol's aim was a little off. He was facing Baekhyun, but his arm was pointing somewhere else. Quick to react, Kyungsoo laughed a little too loudly, going out of his way and taking the popsicle stick instead. Baekhyun threw them confused looks, and Kyungsoo waved him off.
"He was just ing around, Baek! You know, testing if you're delirious or not from the heat yet." Kyungsoo pushed the popsicle stick into Baekhyun's hands, and got his own share from the plastic bag himself. All the while, Chanyeol just stayed quiet.
"You lied to me..." Baekhyun continued, and Kyungsoo wrapped an arm around him consolingly.
"Third."
"...are you counting our kisses again, oh my God." Baekhyun let out a giggle, and Chanyeol grinned triumphantly.
"You laughed! That's good. I didn't want you crying as you leave." Chanyeol leaned down before Baekhyun could reply, catching his lips in a kiss more heated and romantic compared to the one that Baekhyun had initiated. They pulled away, ignoring everyone around them. Blushing, Baekhyun bit his lips before looking away.
"Fourth." Baekhyun mumbled, and Chanyeol laughed, ruffling Baekhyun's hair.
"See? It's fun counting them. Makes you anticipate the next one. I'm sure we'll reach more than a hundred kisses."
"W-we won't even reach a hundred kisses, you giant...giant idiot...!" Baekhyun's heart hurt, his eyes hurt, but he couldn't care less, because Chanyeol must be hurting more.
"By the way...where's Chanyeol? I haven't seen him...and this is his Skype account you're using." Baekhyun commented, and Kyungsoo's smile faltered. Mrs. Byun suddenly left the screen.
"Chanyeol...well, he's, uhm, out with his dad on a business trip. He told me his password so that I could contact you anytime I wanted." Kyungsoo looked uncomfortable, and Baekhyun was about to question it until his phone rang.
"You said you weren't hiding things from me but...you liar..." Baekhyun's sobs were growing weaker now, and Kyungsoo could only hug him in response. Junmyeon didn't say anything, looking away as he himself willed his tears back. He had grown attached to Chanyeol during the year he had attended to the boy.
However, as he came nearer and nearer to the latest messages, he noticed something. Chanyeol's writing seemed to grow larger, like a kid's, and it got messier with each letter. Baekhyun had to squint sometimes to read the hangul letters clearly. Then, Chanyeol's last message, sent to him a few days ago, was no longer like the scanned images that he liked to make. It was just an ordinary, standard e-mail, asking him how he was and wishing him good luck. Just that. The last message was from Kyungsoo, and it only contained three words: Chanyeol needs you.
Standing up from his seat, he brushed Kyungoo's arm off and bowed at Junmyeon, excusing himself. He didn't even care if he looked horrible with his blotchy face and puffy eyes. His appearance was the last thing on his mind. Seeing Chanyeol's door slightly ajar, he pushed it open, striding through the room and enveloping the surprised tall boy in a tight hug. Baekhyun had his arms wrapped around Chanyeol's neck, and he was nuzzling him, tears streaming out his eyes. Chanyeol only blinked in surprise.
"Chanyeol, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't here with you when you needed me. Why didn't you tell me? Why? For 's sake, I care about you, Chanyeol...why wouldn't you tell me something like this?" Baekhyun's body shook as he cried harder, and he could feel Chanyeol mustering all his energy and power to hug him back. He felt shaky hands touch the small of his back and it was enough.
"I-I-I...d-d-d-didn't...w-w-want y-you..t-to...w-worry..." Baekhyun broke with every stutter and syllable. He hugged Chanyeol tighter before pulling away, cupping Chanyeol's face.
"Your doctor says you've only got...a-a...a week left, Chanyeol..." He was aware of Kyungsoo and Junmyeon standing by the doorway, the shorter boy sobbing silently at the scene.
Chanyeol looked down, and Baekhyun saw tears forming in his eyes. He hastily wiped them away with his thumb.
"...we'll make it the best week, okay? And...your doctor's wrong, Chanyeol." Baekhyun leaned closer, pressing their foreheads together as he closed his eyes, tears streaming down his cheeks. "He's wrong when he says that all you have is a week."
Chanyeol looked at him through his lashes, his hands shaking uncontrollably over his lap. Baekhyun could see that Chanyeol wanted to hold him so badly but he couldn't even move his hands the right way, and it hurt him to see his boyfriend trying so hard, and yet, fate was cruel enough to give someone as perfectly imperfect as Chanyeol this cruel disease. Taking Chanyeol's hand with one of his while his other remained pressed against Chanyeol's cheek, he brought up Chanyeol's hand to his lips and kissed his hand.
"You have me, too, Chanyeol. Not just a week, but me, too." And Baekhyun pressed their lips together, their kiss tasting of salty tears and painful realities.
As Baekhyun pulled away, he felt that heart-wrenching feeling again as he heard Chanyeol utter something.
"S-s-s-sixth."
Baekhyun looked away, silently crying as he wondered why they weren't given the chance to reach more than a hundred kisses.
Junmyeon allowed Baekhyun to stay the week in Chanyeol's room. Chanyeol was all smiles, and Baekhyun tried his best to do the same, but whenever he found himself alone, he could only cry as reality washed over him. Chanyeol was indeed bad news, but he was the kind of bad news that Baekhyun would take any time of the day.
Day one.
"Alright, lover boy, what do you want to do today?"
Baekhyun sat down beside Chanyeol, hooking his arm around Chanyeol's and resting his chin on his shoulder. Chanyeol shakily pointed to his drawer, and Baekhyun reached over to open. Inside was one piece of paper with a list of ten things. Baekhyun sat back down in his seat, cocking an eyebrow at the list titled with: Chanyeol's Wish List!. The writing was still neat and organized, so Baekhyun guessed that Chanyeol must have written it when he was still okay.
"A wish list?" Baekhyun read out loud, and Chanyeol nodded, lips twitching into a smile. Baekhyun shrugged, turning back to the list. "Alright then, let's see what you got here."
1. Play the guitar again. I want Baek to sing as I play.
2. Have a picnic with my friends. Nothing beats that sappy .
3. Go stargazing with Baek. We've never done it before, and stars are nice.
4. Do the do. Will Baek say yes to this? kekeke
5. Kiss Baek for the hundredth time. Impossible, but it's free to dream.
6. Play soccer with Jongin and beat his .
7. Eat Kyungsoo's kimchi spaghetti again! I'm sure Baek will love it.
8. Get better. Is this possible?
9. Fall in love.
10. Say I love you, and hear it back in return.
Baekhyun felt his vision blurring with tears as he progressed down the list. It was so Chanyeol. Only half of it was possible, and as his eyes fell on 9, he had to look away as he fought back tears. He turned back when he felt a familiar weight on his shoulder. Chanyeol was resting his head on it, hand slowly and shakily reaching out for Baekhyun. Baekhyun remained still, and as Chanyeol placed his hand on top of Baekhyun's, he felt the taller male relax.
"I'll be honest, Yeol." Baekhyun started, and Chanyeol nodded his head slightly. "We can't do everything in this list."
"...I-I...k-know." Chanyeol stuttered, and Baekhyun's heart must have broken for the millionth time already.
"I'm sorry..."
Chanyeol gripped Baekhyun's hand as tightly as he could, and he mustered all the effort that he could to talk. "Y-you...b-being here...i-i-i-is fine...I..c-couldn't a-a-ask...f-for more, B-B-B-Baek...h-hyunnie."
For the rest of the day, Baekhyun just stayed with Chanyeol in the room, recounting his tales from Tokyo and watching Chanyeol's face change. He missed Chanyeol.
Too bad he only had a week left.
Day two.
Jongin's back, and Baekhyun was more than happy because he could finally strike off two things in Chanyeol's list. While Chanyeol was asleep, he called Kyungsoo on the phone.
"Kyungsoo? May I ask for a favour?"
"Anything, Baek."
"Could you make Chanyeol some kimchi spaghetti?"
"...that's his favourite." Kyungsoo commented wistfully, and Baekhyun nodded, knowing that Kyungsoo wouldn't see it.
"I noticed. Also, could you please get ready for a picnic? Later in the afternoon. Bring Jongin, okay?"
"Alright, see you."
Baekhyun ended the call and went directly to Junmyeon's office. Knocking on the door, he poked his head inside and went straight to the point.
"May I take Chanyeol outside for today?"
Baekhyun panted as he pushed Chanyeol's wheelchair up the grassy hill just beside the hospital. He mentally cursed Kyungsoo and Jongin for choosing such a high spot, but digressed as the saw the contented look on Chanyeol's face. Arriving at the top, they soon spotted Jongin and Kyungsoo bickering as they prepared the food. Kyungsoo was the first to see them. He waved them over, and Baekhyun hurried his steps.
Arriving at the picnic area, Baekhyun made sure to lock the wheels of Chanyeol's wheelchair. He situated himself beside the chair and picked a bento box full of kimchi spaghetti. Holding it up and a forkful of the said food, he held it up to Chanyeol's mouth.
"Say ah, Chanyeol." Baekhyun grinned, and Chanyeol did as he was told. He had trouble eating, but small doses were fine.
Kyungsoo smiled at the scene. "I remember you two doing that back in high school. Baekhyun even had the gall to deny that you two were dating." Chanyeol's eye twitched as the corners of his lips curled into a smile.
"Well, technically, my denial was true. We really weren't dating yet at that time." Baekhyun stuck his tongue out, and Jongin nodded wistfully, eyeing the said couple.
"Well, that's fine. You two will be forever now, anyways." Jongin mumbled, and Baekhyun gulped. Putting down the bento box and fork, he put on a smile as he excused himself. Kyungsoo caught on as he stood up as well, following Baekhyun and leaving Jongin and Chanyeol alone.
Baekhyun hurried down the hill, vision already impaired because of his tears. He slipped on a stupid leaf, and as he fell on his backside, he didn't even bother standing up. Hugging his knees, he cried, feeling Kyungsoo's arms wrap around him.
"I-I can't do this, Kyung...I can't live knowing that he's dying."
When they got back to the hotel room, Baekhyun helped Chanyeol up to his bed. Fishing out the piece of paper from his pocket, he placed it on top of Chanyeol's table and struck out two numbers. He grinned at Chanyeol, leaning closer to place a kiss on his cheek.
2. Have a picnic with my friends. Nothing beats that sappy .
7. Eat Kyungsoo's kimchi spaghetti again! I'm sure Baek will love it.
Day three.
Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun as he carried a guitar case on his back. Baekhyun wiggled it around before taking the guitar out. He took the huge instrument out, placing it on top of Chanyeol's legs. He positioned his boyfriend's hands over the strings and the fret bar, and Baekhyun himself sat down on his designated chair.
"Okay, I know you can't use your hands that well anymore, so...let's just pretend. Just remember how we were back in the days. When we spent those boring Saturdays in your room just making music the whole time." Baekhyun smiled at him, and he watched as Chanyeol looked down at the guitar, tears falling. Chanyeol never cried in front of anyone. Baekhyun leaned forward, hand reaching out and the tips of his fingers brushing against the taller boy's arm. "Cry it out, Yeol, I won't judge. I'll be here, so you'll have a shoulder to cry on, too."
On any normal day, Baekhyun would have felt weird singing his heart out while Chanyeol cried in front of him, guitar lying useless in his hold. But he didn't care anymore. All that mattered was Chanyeol.
And that's how it was going to be from that day on.
I do believe all the love you give,
all of the things you do.
Love you, love you;
I’ll keep you safe, don’t you worry.
I wouldn’t leave, want to keep you near
'cause I feel the same way, too.
Love you, love you.
I want you to know that I'm with you.
I will love you and love you and love you,
Going to hold you and hold you and squeeze you.
I will please you for all times.
I don't want to lose you and lose you and lose you,
'cause I need you, I need you, I need you.
1. Play the guitar again. I want Baek to sing as I play.
Day four.
Chanyeol spent the day with Junmyeon, making last minute check-ups and hoping that there'd be some change.
There wasn't.
Chanyeol was still dying.
Day five.
"Hey, Yeollie, we're going out tonight!"
Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun blankly. Baekhyun stared back, surprised at the lack of reaction. Chanyeol frowned, before taking a deep, shaky breath.
"H-H-How...c-c-can you....st-still smile...w-w-when I-I'm d-dying?"
Baekhyun felt like he had been stabbed, but he just sighed, before sitting down beside Chanyeol, taking his hand into his. Lacing their fingers together, he looked at Chanyeol straight in the eyes.
"I don't have the right to cry."
At that, Chanyeol's frown deepened.
"You can cry, if you want, but I won't. I'll smile, even if I have to force myself. I'll smile for the both of us, even when you're gone. I'll smile, because you smile, too, when I do. I'll smile, so that the last things we remember about each other is our smiles. I'm fine with you crying, but I don't want to cry. You're already going through a hard time, I don't want you remembering me as a crybaby." Baekhyun smiled, his lips pressed into a thin line as he fought back a sob.
Chanyeol remained quiet before turning his head to the side with difficulty. He leaned forward, his lips brushing against Baekhyun's cheek. The contact made Baekhyun's eyes tear up.
"Th-thank you."
That night, the stars seemed brighter and prettier as Baekhyun and Chanyeol lay side by side on the hospital's rooftop. A wishing star shot through the sky, and Baekhyun made a silent wish. An impossible wish. He knew it would hurt to even try, but he might as well.
"I wish Chanyeol would get better."
3. Go stargazing with Baek. We've never done it before, and stars are nice.
Day six.
Chanyeol reached up, hands shaking. Brushing away a few strands of hair from blocking Baekhyun's eyes, he smiled.
"I-I love y-you, B-Baekhy-hyun."
Baekhyun stood up from his seat, leaned over Chanyeol, and pressed their lips together.
"That's the first time you've said it, Chanyeol." Baekhyun commented, and Chanyeol sighed, nodding. Baekhyun caressed his cheek with his fingers, smiling sadly. Tomorrow was Chanyeol's last day. "Yeol."
Chanyeol looked back at him.
"I love you, too. So much that it hurts."
5. Kiss Baek for the seventhth time. Edited by Byun Baek!
10. Say I love you, and hear it back in return.
Day seven.
Baekhyun dropped the plastic bag on the floor as he entered Chanyeol's room. Junmyeon was standing beside the bed, looking solemn. Kyungsoo, Jongin, Taejoon, Mrs. and Mr. Byun, stood in a corner. Chanyeol was lying on the bed, unmoving.
"I...Is he..." Baekhyun managed to rasp out, and Junmyeon looked up at him. His expression was strained, and he shook his head.
"He...he's barely holding on. We've done everything we could. I'm sorry. He's just waiting for you, Baekhyun."
Baekhyun felt like his shoes had lead in them, disabling him to walk properly. Gathering whatever courage he had left, he hurriedly went to Chanyeol's side. As soon as he was near enough, Chanyeol's eyes fluttered open. His hand lifted up ever so slightly, and Baekhyun made a grab for it, pressing it to his lips.
"H-hey, I'm here. H-hold on, you were fine the last few days, weren't you? Chanyeol, hold on. D-Don't go." Baekhyun whispered, and Chanyeol shook his head, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled slightly.
"Th-thank you...f-for b-b-b-being h-here....with me."
"Chanyeol, shh, don't talk. You're not g-going anywhere. We'll reach a hundred kisses! I promise! Just...just stay here with me...please..." Baekhyun couldn't stop the tears anymore. All the other occupants in the room we're crying already, too.
"D-don't c-cry."
"Then d-don't leave me."
"...s-sorry."
"...Chanyeol, I love you. I love you. I love you." Baekhyun muttered in between sobs, and Chanyeol's hand twitched in his. He looked up.
"Smile."
Chanyeol didn't stutter. Baekhyun looked at him with wide eyes before he squeezed Chanyeol's hand as he stood up. Taking a deep breath and tuning out everyone's sobs around him, he recalled all the happy moments he had with Chanyeol. Their first meeting, their friendship, their first argument, their first kiss, their first date-- it hurt. A lot. But it also made him feel happy again. He leaned closer to Chanyeol, their lips inches apart. He smiled, and Chanyeol smiled, too.
And it was over.
The heart monitor showed a flat line, the beeping sound piercing the air. Chanyeol's chest stopped heaving, his eyes were closed, his lips parted slightly and his fingers linked with Baekhyun's. Baekhyun squeezed his hand, his smile dropping as he finally let the remainng tears fall.
"Y-you didn't even let us reach eighth. Idiot."
A/N: To those who watched 1Ltr of Tears, ah, well, you'll know where I got the feels for this. Fck, I cried while writing the Day Seven part okay.
Okay, it's 2:55AM over here. Off to watch some Japanese dude play through a Japanese horror game. I'm outta here, osas~
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