Luhan was sitting under the big oak tree with his knees tucked to his chest. It was going to rain soon. Thunder boomed from the sky above. Drops of water rolled down his pale cheeks, dripping off at the edge of his chin, splashing on his crumpled uniform. He was crying. His hair was unruly, a few strands were jutting out in odd angles. His shirt was untucked and dirty, a little torn at the sides. His whole attire was filthy. He looked wrecked and battered up. Gone was his clean-cut image. His fragile body looked so crooked and bent at the sides. He knew his ankles were fractured and had dislocated a shoulder. He looked utterly broken. His face bore deep purples and bluish-blacks. Thick red blood was seeping out, just a tiny cut on his upper lip. Luhan gave a sad smile and coughed out blood. It was all red. Anyone who knew Luhan, the real Luhan, would say the same thing. Only one word popped in their mind.

Chaos.

Luhan's world became chaotic when he stepped into Luhan's dull and systematic life. Well, Luhan used to be robot-like. Although teachers and friends may like 'robot' Luhan - because he was likeable, a caring and obedient student, often helpful - Luhan hated it. His life was boring. It was the same old routine over and over again. Wake up, breakfast, school, lunch, part-time work, dinner, homework, sleep. Luhan desperately crave for a much colourful life than his dull grey. He wanted colours. And colours was what he got in the form of a strawberry red.

In the second month of school, a new student entered his chemistry class with a pokerface. His striking strawberry red hair caught everyone's eyes including Luhan. He was handsome, no doubt, but his face portrayed no emotions, as if it was a hardened mask, stiff and stoic. Right from day one, strawberry boy aroused Luhan's curiosity. Luhan was intrigued by the boy's cold exterior, only finding him smiling at the slightest thing such as watching the pitter patter of raindrops from the classroom window or even looking at a flower bud blooming in late spring. Luhan observed the boy for weeks before finally learning his name. And that too was through Kim Jongin, one of Luhan's close friends. By then, Luhan's blank canvas was starting fill with swirls of pastels, creating a beautiful masterpiece.

It was about a month after strawberry boy entered Luhan's class - Luhan nicknamed him because Mr Kang did not bother introducing him - when he finally learnt his name. It was on a Tuesday afternoon when Jongin introduced his new roommate as Oh Sehun, much to Luhan's surprise. Jongin mentioned that Oh Sehun was his friend from his dance academy and he decided to move in when he had some family problems. Luhan greeted his strawberry boy for the first time with a shy smile. The boy merely answered back with a faint 'Hi' before walking off. Jongin shrugged his shoulders when Luhan's eyes searched his for an answer. Weird kid, Jongin whispered before sauntering off to find his girlfriend.

To say that Luhan was stalking was somewhat wrong. He merely observed the boy, only much more intensely. Jongin had told him off before when he caught Luhan staring too hard.

"You're creepy, stop that," Jongin muttered distastefully.

But he was caught staring at Sehun one day by the boy himself. From the study bench under a sheltered hut, Luhan spied not-so-discretely on Oh Sehun who was flipping his book under the old, shady oak tree in the campus' garden. As if feeling Luhan's stare on him, Sehun looked up and met Luhan's eyes. Instead of glaring and returning to his book, Sehun gave the faintest smile he could muster which caused Luhan's cheeks to flourish pink. Luhan's eyes widened before hurriedly burying himself into his calculus textbook. From then on, the exchange of smiles became more frequent. Luhan actually found himself smiling genuinely and people, especially, Jongin noticed the slight pink tint on his cheeks. And the soft pink hue slowly became permanent on Luhan's cheeks. It made him look livelier, his smiles were warm rather than the usual half-hearted smiles.

"Luhan, right?" a mellow voice asked from behind the bookshelves where Luhan was currently at.

"Who's that?" Luhan whispered back.

"It's me," the voice replied. Through the gaps along the bookshelves, Luhan caught a hint of red hair and immediately thought of Sehun.

"Sehun?" he asked timidly. "What is it?"

"Can you tutor me for chemistry? Mr Kang referred me to you since you're the top student for chemistry. He thinks you're qualified enough to tutor me," Sehun's tone was shy and unsure. To Luhan, he sounded adorable with his slight lisp. Disappointed by Luhan's lack of answer, Sehun sighed, "It's okay if you don't want to."

Luhan blinked, trying to snap out of a daze. "Wait! I'll help!" he yelled, forgetting that he was in the library, supposedly searching for history books. Everyone turned to Luhan and sent him dirty looks. The old librarian shook her head in disapproval as they eyed Luhan from top to bottom. Kids these days, she grumbled unhappily.

They became close thanks to chemistry. Luhan was a good teacher and Sehun was a good student. They just clicked. It wasn't a shock to Mr Kang when Sehun passed his chemistry with flying colours. And it was no surprise to Jongin when Luhan and Sehun's friendship improved from being just acquaintances to close friends in a span of two months. Within those months, Sehun shared a lot about himself. Certain things were left unsaid but Luhan picked it up slowly. Luhan knew Sehun's habits inside out. And in return, Luhan told Sehun about himself too. They shared a few similarities and one of it was drinking bubble tea. Luhan finally figured out Sehun's personality. The 'real' Oh Sehun was carefree and emotional. A crybaby, Luhan once said. Only Luhan who had been observant enough, caught those glimpses of 'real' Oh Sehun in school when Sehun slipped up. After knowing each other better, Sehun was willing to let his guard down more often. It was a friendship built upon trust.

"You guys have chemistry," Jongin once joked, earning a playful slap on the shoulder from Luhan and a glare from Sehun.

As for Luhan, Sehun meant the world to him. Sehun was his listening ear, his ray of hope, his happiness. Sehun fills in the missing colours in his life. Instead of the usual ugly grey, Sehun paints pretty shades of red, yellow and green onto his canvas alongside the previous pastel swirls. The colours were more brighter just like how Luhan's feelings for Sehun became stronger. It made Luhan happy. It made him forget what grey was.

But happiness were never meant to last long no matter how hard people try to keep it.

It wasn't long until Luhan accidentally stumbled across Sehun's diary which contained a love letter. A love letter for an unnamed girl. Luhan felt crushed. The strange feelings Luhan had for Sehun had been silently growing stronger. His love was like a tiny little seed which grew into a healthy and strong seedling after much care. It was planted in the deepest parts of the garden, a sacred place, his heart. It grew and grew till one day, a flower bloomed. Luhan's love for Sehun eventually blossomed into something even stronger. Luhan never doubted that he had feelings for Sehun. Right from the moment Sehun stepped in, Luhan knew he was a goner. However like other flowers, Luhan's flower began to wilt when he found out Sehun liked girls. Luhan's love for Sehun withered too because he discovered that Sehun had a crush on a girl. Even though the flower wilted, the plant refused to uproot because it was rooted too firmly. He could not uproot it. Luhan could not stop loving Sehun. He could not undo it. It was too late. He fell too hard and there was no way out. He read the confession letter with a broken heart. Who was she? Who was the girl who had 'pretty brown eyes which twinkled like stars' and whose 'smile melted the coldest of hearts'? Oh how lucky that girl was! Unbeknownst to Luhan, Sehun's confession letter was meant for him. He was the one with pretty brown eyes and heartwrenching smile. If only he had not jump to conclusions too quickly.

They were huddled under the shady oak tree, a special place - sort of like a rendezvous - during lunch, eating sandwiches Sehun packed. Luhan was strangely quiet. Whatever Sehun said simple didn't register in his brain. Sehun noticed Luhan's discomfort. He was different that day.

"Luhan hyung, are you okay? Did you sleep well last night?" Sehun wore a concerned look.

"It's just a slight headache. Nothing much," Luhan waved it off.

A slight headache because of thinking too much about you, Luhan thought.

"Oh," a pause. Sehun drew in a sharp breath and finally said, "Luhan hyung, I've got something to tell you. Please don't be mad."

Luhan willed himself to be strong and waited for it. For Sehun to say something about his crush on the unnamed girl. Luhan avoided Sehun's eyes and studied the bright green grass.

"Luhan hyung, look at me," Sehun pleaded when Luhan ignored him. In a desperate attempt to get Luhan's attention, Sehun cupped Luhan's face gently and brought his face closer. "Listen to me alright?"

Luhan sighed and nodded his head reluctantly. He was well aware of the fact that Sehun was touching his face and both their faces were only inches apart. Luhan felt his face heating up at the most inappropriate timing but he knew what came next. The thought of that makes him feel queasy.

"Luhan hyung, I like you."

Wait, what? That wasn't right. Sehun likes me, Luhan repeated that in his mind for a good measure. Disbelief was written all over his face. He was speechless. He wasn't prepared for that. Luhan stared at Sehun, confused by the turn of events. Sehun was waiting for an answer or any form of reaction from Luhan. But Luhan's silence wasn't encouraging. Sehun's lips started quivering and tears threatened to fall. He bit his lips and willed himself not to cry. He should have known better than to confess to Luhan like that. He should have given the confession letter instead. It was a mistake.

"I'm sorry hyung. I'm really really sorry. If you don't like me, can we at least remain as friends? Please don't leave me," Sehun cried softly. Fresh tears started to roll down his cheeks. "I'm sorry."

That snapped Luhan out of his reverie. "You silly boy," he immediately hugged Sehun tightly. "I like you too. I have always liked you. Ever since you stepped into my chemistry class," Luhan rubbed Sehun's back in an attempt to soothe the sobbing boy. "I have always liked my strawberry boy."

Sehun eventually told Luhan - a few days later - that his homouality was the main reason why he moved out from his parents' house. His father could not tolerate homouality and sent him out. Sehun was disowned by his father without second thought. His mother though, accepted him for who he was but her pleas were left unheard. However, Sehun received monthly allowance from his mother, on his father's behalf. His father still do care about him. Luhan shot him a wistful smile.

"My Ma died," he simply said. Sehun's smile faded. "She died giving birth to me. My Pa abandoned me. I was brought up by my grandparents before moving out on my own. They still call though," Luhan continued bitterly. And of course those grandparents happened to be extremely homophobic. Homouality was never a topic mentioned over dinner. Luhan knew better than to dwell on that topic.

Sehun gave a small, sad smile. "It's okay. You have me now. I'll protect you at any cost," he comforted Luhan. Sehun gently tucked a few strands of hair behind Luhan's ear and pecked his forehead.

"Sheesh Sehun, you treat me like a girl. I'm manly too you know," Luhan muttered tiredly as his eyes fluttered shut. A soft snore was elicited. To Sehun, it sounded more like a little kitten purring. Sehun could only smile at the adorable sight.

Just then he felt a sharp pain in his head. The splitting headaches were getting more frequent lately. Plagued by sudden exhaustion, Sehun buried his face into Luhan's tousled blonde hair and kissed it before falling asleep. It wouldn't hurt to skip some classes, right?

Time passed quickly with Sehun by his side. Luhan noted that another three months passed ever since Sehun confessed. It was already mid-August, the beginning of autumn and it was almost the end of the year and finals were coming. It was during that time when Luhan noticed that Sehun looked rather haggard. There were dark eye circles around his eyes that were far more prominent against his sickly pale skin. His hair was in a mess. His face wore a tired expression and his attire was unkempt. At times, Sehun would be so lost in thought that Luhan had to tap him a few time on the cheeks to get his attention. He would also fall asleep during chemistry. Luhan thought Sehun was tired because of the upcoming finals. Maybe he was studying too hard. Maybe that was why he complained about the frequent headaches. Every time Luhan asked, Sehun avoided his question.

"Sehun-ah, are your headaches getting any better?" Luhan brushed off Sehun's fringe as he popped the question. Sehun mumbled a soft yes which wasn't enough to convince Luhan. "If it gets worse, promise me you'll visit the doctor?" Luhan held out his little pinky.

Sehun grunted, agreeing to it half-heartedly. Sehun didn't even bother sealing the pinky promise with his pinky. Luhan frowned at Sehun's lack of response. Strange.

They were studying in the campus' library, sitting at an isolated corner, going through their anatomy textbook when Sehun suddenly poked Luhan's side. "Hyung, I'm bored. Let's go on a date."

"Sehun-ah, not now. Finals are coming. Going on a date isn't important right now."

"But hyung, I'm afraid we won't have time to spend with each other," Sehun reasoned in a strained voice.

"Why is that so? We have all the time we want after our exams, Sehun. Don't be petty," Luhan was annoyed by Sehun's paranoia.

"Hyung please hear me out. Please just this time," he begged, jutting his lips out, hands clasping each other. How was Luhan supposed to say no to Sehun's aegyo?

"Fine. Just this once," Luhan sighed, giving up. Sehun broke out into a wide grin. His face instantly morphed into a pained expression as he clutched his temples. He rubbed it gently, trying to soothe the pain. Worried, Luhan prodded him, "Are you okay? Did you visit the doctor, Sehun?"

"I'm fine. It's just a headache. I've got medication for it," Sehun gave a small smile.

"If you say so," Luhan looked at Sehun, still unconvinced. Luhan didn't press in the matter. If Sehun didn't tell him, he won't force it out of him. Sehun can tell him when he's ready.

"I know the best bubble tea shop around here," Sehun chirped happily, and Luhan willingly obliged.

"Lead the way, Sehun-ah," Luhan smiled warmly.

After grabbing themselves bubble tea - Sehun buying chocolate for both Luhan and himself - he dragged Luhan into a shop selling couple items. The first thing that caught Luhan's eyes were a pair of intricate looking couple rings but the price turned him off. It was just too expensive. Sehun had an idea entirely different than him.

"What's this?" Luhan asked curiously, eyeing the velvety bag which Sehun held. Slowly, Sehun pulled out a pair of necklace with the letter 'H' on both.

"H stands for Hun. Another H stands for Han. Hunhan. It's our couple name," Sehun explained with a wide smile.

"Hunhan? Why is your name placed first? I'm older, my name should be in front," Luhan folded his arms exaggeratedly.

"Then it would sound weird. Come on hyung, Hanhun sounds a lot more weirder than Hunhan," Sehun rolled his eyes. "Anyway, wear this all the time. If you wear this, it's like I'm there protecting you when I'm gone," Sehun quickly put the necklace around Luhan's neck and clasped the hook before Luhan could protest.

"What do you mean by 'When I'm gone'?" Luhan raised his eyebrows.

"Did I really say that? I don't think so. You must be really overthinking things, Lu. You need to let loose sometimes," Sehun massaged Luhan's shoulder in an attempt to change the topic. And Luhan decided not to press on the matter.

They were walking hand in hand along the slightly empty streets when they heard someone shouting Sehun's name. Sehun's face turned deathly pale and Luhan feared for the worst. A group of five boys started chasing them. Sehun ran as fast as he could with Luhan tagging along behind him, fingers still intertwined. They halted in front of a dead end. There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.

"You can run but you can't hide, Sehunnie," one of them sneered.

"What do you want from me?" Fear was evident in Sehun's eyes. How could he protect Luhan and himself from five attackers. Well ,assuming that Luhan can't fight. One against five? That was unfair.

"What do we want from you? You almost killed Lay last time we met. He's still in coma thanks to you," the blonde spoke up.

"It wasn't my fault he attacked me first. I was merely defending myself," Sehun replied.

"Is that why you changed schools? To run away from us?"

"No, I-"

"Hey, who's that pretty one there?" A brunette haired boy asked."What's your name?"

"Don't disturb him. He's not involved in this," Sehun hissed, shielding Luhan away from the boys. He held his arms out in a protective stance.

"If he's yours, then definitely he's involved." Luhan was puzzled.

Was Sehun a gangster? Or some pretty messed out kid who picked up fights? Sehun never mentioned anything at all. As much as Luhan wanted to yell at Sehun for not telling him everything about himself, he needed to protect the sickly Sehun. Luhan didn't want to do it. But he had to, looking at the way Sehun was tiredly trying to prevent a fight from happening. When the boys lunged towards Sehun, Luhan pushed Sehun aside roughly and did his best fighting them off with the Taekwondo, Wushu and Hapkido he learnt from his previous roommates. He surely learnt well because he fended them off expertly, escaping with a few cuts and bruises. The five boys scurried away with black eyes and dislocated limbs, groaning in pain.

Luhan turned around to find a wide eyed Sehun staring at him in awe. Sehun was as utterly shock. He didn't know Luhan was a fighter, just like him - despite how feminine and weak he looked. Looking at Sehun, Luhan felt a heavy feeling his chest. Sehun looked so small and helpless on the ground. He could not stay mad at him. So when Sehun had trouble standing up, Luhan gently helped him up to his feet.

"Sehun-ah, what was that all about?" Luhan slung his arms around Sehun's waist and pulled him closer so that he could stabilise him.

"Ah, a fight in the previous school. I was transferred to another school. The headmaster feared for my life," Sehun chuckled bitterly. "I can't believe they're still finding me."

"You're lucky I knew some martial arts," Luhan huffed.

"Some? You're an expert, hyung. You're so cool!"

"Really? I learnt them from my previous roommates. Minseok taught me Taekwondo, Tao taught me Wushu and Baekhyun taught me Hapkido. They said I look feminine and people might take advantage of me," Luhan laughed light-heartedly, reminiscing the times he had with his roommates, especially Tao who was overprotective over him.

"Well, they're right. I'm glad they taught you," Sehun murmured. "Thank you, hyung."

Luhan wore a bewildered expression and looked at Sehun for an answer.

"For saving my life. I should be the one protecting you but you're protecting me instead."

"It doesn't matter. We'll have to take turns till you get well enough to be my guardian," Luhan ruffled Sehun's hair and gazed at him tenderly.

Sehun mumbled a soft "I hope so" which Luhan seemed to miss.

Luhan took the initiative to send Sehun all the way to Jongin's apartment despite the arguments he and Sehun had. You're too weak, Sehun-ah, Luhan said firmly. Sehun eventually agreed.

It was a Saturday and Luhan was working part-time at a coffeehouse near his apartment. He made sure he wore the necklace under his uniform. Jongdae and Chanyeol noticed it of course, and they didn't left him alone.

"Is it your strawberry boy, you keep fantasizing about?" Chanyeol wiggled his eyebrow. "So you're a couple now, right?"

"Did you do naughty things, Luhan hyung? You looked exhausted. Must've had a rough night," Jongdae laughed at his own question.

"I don't think so Jongdae. Look at him. He doesn't have the afterglow," Chanyeol answered, staring at Luhan.

"Yah, I'm right here. Save it for when I'm not around. Sheesh, buggers," Luhan was irritated.

"Aww, Lulu hyung is angry. He's ually frustrated," Jongdae sang in a pitchy voice.

"He wants the D, right hyung?" Chanyeol asked innocently.

Luhan turned scarlet red. Did he just imagine Sehun ? Luhan shook his head before glaring at the two idiots. "I'm going to make the orders."

"Lu hyung, someone's here for you," Jongdae yelled from the front counter. Luhan popped his head out from the kitchen and saw some red hair. He immediately broke into a grin. He walked over to Sehun since the shop was a little empty.

"What are you doing here?"

"I craved for some coffee made by my Lulu," Sehun smiled sweetly. He noticed the slight glimmer under Luhan's collar and smiled even wider. "You wore it, the necklace I gave."

"Of course. Now wait for a moment while I whip up something sweet for you." Luhan pulled away from Sehun who was looking even more fragile than when he last saw him. His clothes merely hung against his thin frame. Maybe when Luhan first met Sehun, he was slim. Now he was just skin and bones. Almost anorexic. It was scaring Luhan to death. His furrowed his eyebrows and his lips were firmly shut in a straight line. He glanced at Sehun while making caramel macchiato and found Sehun sleeping. Just looking at Sehun was scary enough. He woke the boy up gently, peppering kisses on his forehead and cheeks. Sehun's eyes fluttered open to find Luhan looking very worried.

"Luhan hyung, why are you so worried. I just fell asleep waiting. I'm still alive," Sehun chuckled.

"No it's just that I- never mind," Luhan sighed, not wanting to finish the sentence. "Here, it's caramel macchiato," Luhan passed the cup to Sehun. Sehun's hand trembled and he had to steady his hand with another. Luhan saw the whole thing but he didn't know what to say.

"I'll be on my way now, hyung," Sehun stood up really slowly, trying to steady himself against the wall.

"Will you be okay?"

"Yeah, Jongin hyung is coming to fetch me," Sehun said and gave Luhan a goodbye kiss.

"Alright. Be safe my Sehunnie. And get well soon," Luhan ruffled the boy's red hair.

"Hyung, it's just a cold. Don't worry, it'll pass."

"If you say so."

Sehun left when Jongin picked him up with his car. Jongin waved at Luhan before driving off. But Luhan caught that look before Jongin drove away. Guilt. What was it that Sehun wasn't telling him? Why did Jongin look so guilty? Was there a secret between those two? Luhan brushed the inappropriate thoughts out of his mind and focused on making coffee.

Monday came. Sehun and Luhan were cuddling under the oak tree before school started. Luhan was playing with Sehun's hair, twisting the tufts of red hair into an odd curly mess. Sehun was busy reading a book with his head on Luhan's lap. It was Luhan who broke the comforting silence.

"Sehun, is there anything you're hiding from me?" Luhan continued playing with Sehun's hair.

Sehun froze for a second and stopped reading. He put his book aside and sat up. "Of course not, hyung. You'd be the first person I tell if there's anything," Sehun wondered where this conversation was heading to.

"Then... are you cheating on me with someone?" Luhan was terribly frightened to look at Sehun.

He felt Sehun shift closer to him and when he looked up, he saw Sehun's sad smile just inches away from his face. "Luhan hyung, I would never do something like that. I love you with all my heart. You're too precious to be treated like that. It is I who isn't worthy of your love," Sehun spoke in a small voice, trying to hide away his sadness.

"I'm sorry for doubting you Sehun. And I love you too. You're worth loving Sehun. You are," Luhan breathed. He leant in and kissed Sehun softly on his lips, afraid he might bruise and bleed. Just like a rose.

Sehun smiled into the kiss and finally pulled away. "Class is starting. Lets go," Sehun tried his very best to stand up on his own but his knees wobbled and Luhan had to hold him instead.

"Meet you at the oak tree during lunch, okay?" Luhan reminded Sehun with a soft peck on the cheeks as they neared their classes. Luhan sent Sehun to his calculus class before going to his history class in the left wing of the campus.

Luhan sat idly in his class. Whatever the professor was saying didn't register in his head. He was staring blankly at the blackboard. His thoughts were all on Sehun. He had a bad feeling about how that day would end. It was some sort of gut feeling he developed when he was around Sehun too much. Luhan prayed hard for the day to end well. Lucky for Luhan, time passed really quickly with all the classes he had. He couldn't wait for lunch. Right after lunch he had chemistry class with Sehun. When the last bell before lunch rang, Luhan gathered all his things and rushed towards Sehun's class but it seemed like he had already made his way to the oak tree with Jongin's help. From far, Luhan saw how concerned and considerate Jongin was towards Sehun. Luhan was grateful Jongin was there to help. Jongin placed Sehun gently on the ground and told him to rest himself against the tree. Sehun adjusted himself weakly and saw Luhan walking towards his direction.

"I guess I'll just leave you guys alone then," Jongin rubbed his neck and left.

"Why are you smiling so wide?" Sehun's voice was raspy.

"I'm glad you have Jongin when I'm not around," Luhan beamed.

"Yeah. And I'm glad that you have Jongin to rely on when I'm not around too," Sehun replied tiredly.

Luhan hummed. "I wrote you a song," Luhan smiled when Sehun intertwined his fingers around his own.

"Sing to me then my little canary," Sehun whispered, his voice barely audible.

In a soft voice Luhan started singing. Sehun hummed along.

gateun narae taeeonaseo gateun eoneoro mareul haeseo cham haenguniya, cham dahaengiya sesange dangyeonhan geon eobseo

gwaenchanheun oseul ibeotdeon nal geureoke neoreul mannatdeon geon lucky na chakhage saraseo geurae

neoui ireumeul bureugo neoui soneul jabado doeneun na buseojineun haessareun naman bichuna na ireoke haengbokhaedo dwae? naui ireumeul bureugo naui eokkaee gidae oneun neo jeo haneurui haessareun neoman bichuna neo geureoke nunbusyeodo dwae? so lucky, my love so lucky to have you so lucky to be your love, i am. hmm 

Luhan ended the song with a sweet smile.

"You sing so beautifully hyung. Why didn't you sing to me before?" Sehun brushed away some stray hair off Luhan's face.

"I was shy," Luhan blushed at Sehun's compliment, playing with his fingers to avoid Sehun's gaze.

"Well you aren't shy now. I think I'm going to miss your voice if you ever stop singing," Sehun kissed Luhan on the forehead, a mere brush. "I'm tired hyung. I'm going to sleep. Wake me up when lunch is over," Sehun yawned.

"Shall I sing till you sleep then?" Luhan asked.

"Hmm."

"Gateun narae-"

"Hyung, you do know that I love you with all my heart, right?" Sehun questioned out of the blue.

"Of course," Luhan was confused. "I know you love me. And I love you too."

"I love you hyung. I can never love you enough," he sealed those words with a passionate kiss on Luhan's pink lips.

Luhan felt something ignite deep within his heart. A strong feeling of loss. Sorrow.

"I'll sleep now hyung. If you let me," Sehun muttered breathlessly. Luhan nodded and help Sehun shift. "Don't forget to sing, okay?" he reminded Luhan.

Sehun lied on Luhan's lap and his eyes fluttered shut. Luhan sang in a soft whispery voice as he watch the shallow rise and fall of Sehun's chest until he too fell asleep.

A lone tear rolled down Sehun's cheeks. "Saranghae, Luhan hyung," Sehun murmured.

Luhan woke up when the last bell rang. Classes were already over. They missed chemistry. Luhan shook Sehun's frail body as gently as he can. "Sehun, wake up." There was no response. "Sehun? Wake up. Classes are over. Wake up Sehun,"

Luhan started panicking. He touched Sehun cheeks. His body temperature was still warm but there wasn't any sign of breathing. "Sehun, wake up!" Luhan yelled, tears started streaming down his face. "Don't die on me, Sehun!"

With a shaky breath, Luhan called an ambulance. When the paramedics came, Sehun was pronounced dead. Luhan was hysterical when the paramedics came to take Sehun's body away.

"My Sehunnie, come back!" Luhan cried uncontrollably.

In the midst of chaos, an arm grabbed him into a car and drove off.

“It’s going to be okay, hyung,” a deep mellow voice comforted him.

“He’s dead. It’s never going to be okay Jongin,” Luhan let out strangled sobs. “It’s not okay.”

Luhan curled himself in the car seat. When Jongin tried to comfort him, Luhan pushed him away harshly. When they reached the hospital, both Luhan and Jongin met Sehun’s parents. Sehun’s parents were grieving but they didn’t look shock. Not as shocked as him. Luhan had always wanted to meet Sehun’s mother. But he didn’t want to meet her like that. Not when Sehun’s gone. It wasn’t how he imagined the meeting to be.

“You must be Luhan, right?” Sehun’s mother asked tenderly. Luhan nodded. She went over and hugged him tight. “Sehun mentioned about you a lot,” she said. That made Luhan burst into tears. “It’s okay sweetie. I know how you feel but Sehun would want us to be strong won’t he?”

“He pr-romised to p-protect m-me,” Luhan tried controlling his tears but he failed miserably.

“He will always protect you, Luhan. Just not in this world,” Sehun’s mother his back, trying to soothe him.

Sehun’s father remained silent throughout the whole exchange. His face showed signs of sorrow but he knew how to control it.

“Did Sehun tell you he suffered from brain cancer?” Sehun’s mother asked as she wiped away her tears.

Shock was written all over his face. “He told me it was a cold,” Luhan bit his lip hard.

“No, it wasn’t. I guess he didn’t want you to worry,” Sehun’s father finally spoke. “He had a cancerous brain tumour. By the time we found out it was too late.”

No wonder Sehun was always exhausted, so weak. He couldn’t even walk long distances without any help. No wonder he relied on Jongin so much. Jongin. He knew. Luhan eyed Jongin who was staring at the floor, hands behind his back, looking extremely guilty. Sehun’s parents left not long after to arrange Sehun’s funeral, leaving Luhan with a very guilty Jongin.

“How long?” Luhan choked back his tears, trying his best not to yell at his friend.

“Wha-?”

“How long have you known, Jongin? That Sehun was sick?” Luhan questioned him. He was bottling up his anger.

“Sehun told me to keep it a secret,” Jongin teared up. “I knew about it towards the end of Summer when he started getting the bad headaches,” he quickly wiped off his tears with the sleeves of his shirt.

“Did he ever mentioned about a fight with a boy named Lay?” Luhan asked suddenly.

Jongin’s eyes widened in surprise. “How did you know?”

“It’s nothing. Just tell me what you know.”

“Well, Sehun and Lay never got along from the beginning. Everyone in the dance academy knew about Sehun’s homouality through Lay. That boy provoked him several times and one day Sehun snapped. I never saw Sehun that angry. It was extremely frightening how Sehun kept pummelling the Chinese boy. It was as if he was a beast. Lay had no chance,” Jongin spoke solemnly, shuddering at the memory of Sehun’s rage. “Of course, Lay’s brothers wanted revenge on Sehun.”

Luhan cupped his face in his hands. Exhaustion taking over his being. His knees buckled and gave way to his tiredness. He wrapped his fingers tightly around the necklace Sehun gave. Fresh tears rolled down his cheeks.

“Sehun-ah, why did you ever leave me all alone?” he asked quietly, to no one in particular.

“I’ll send you home, hyung,” Jongin pulled Luhan to his feet and slung his arms around Luhan’s shoulder.

“Do me a favour, Jongin” Luhan began. Jongin waited expectantly for an order. “Bring Sehun’s stuff over to my apartment once you’re done cleaning.”

Jongin nodded, agreeing immediately.

Attending Sehun’s funeral was one of the most difficult things Luhan went through. He decided to wear Sehun’s clothes that day, another way of remembering Sehun.

 Luhan’s eyes were red and splotchy. His entire face was swollen from crying too much. Sehun’s mother called him up to say a few words. Luhan cleared his throat and began in a broken voice, “Sehun, he was my sunshine.”His tears were never ending. Subconsciously, he touched the pendant Sehun gave and continued, “Sehun was my painter. He painted so many colours in my life. He was something I needed. Having to lose someone as precious as Sehunnie is just the same a losing all my limbs. I will never forget my strawberry boy.”

When the service ended, Jongin offered a ride home but Luhan declined politely. Luhan just needed time to be alone. And Jongin let him be. It was difficult for Luhan to get over Sehun’s death. Right before Sehun left, he had painted wonderful things in Luhan’s life, exactly what Luhan wanted. There were only deep reds, blues and purples.

A few months passed, Luhan still hadn’t move on. His world was black. All black. Luhan became a shadow of his former self. He was beginning to lose his colour. The pink tint was fading slowly. He became ghastly pale. He rarely ate and because of that, he was thin and frail. He couldn’t sleep well. His sleep was laced with nightmares of losing Sehun again and again. Not even Chanyeol, nor Jongdae or Jongin could help him. Luhan simply refused to be helped. Everyone was worried for him. Especially Jongin.

“Eat, hyung,” Jongin brought a spoonful of porridge to Luhan’s lips but the boy turned away. “Sehun wouldn’t like to see you this way.”

“Sehun’s dead, Jongin. If he’s dead, I’m dead. There’s no point living for me. I have nothing left,” Luhan’s breath was ragged.

It was a week before finals started. Luhan was trudging down the streets. The wind was blowing strongly. The weather was cool, suitable for the end of fall. Luhan paid no attention to his surroundings. His main aim was to get to the campus’ library to return the books which were long overdue. But he was roughly dragged into an alley just round the corner from the campus.

“He’s the one,” a muffled voice said. Luhan was in a daze. He looked up, only to receive a strong punch across his face.

Before Luhan had the chance to recognise his attackers, he was kicked in the stomach, pummelled continuously. Luhan couldn’t defend himself. He was too weak. He gave up trying to live long ago. Luhan heard something cracked. He cried out in pain. The pain was agonising. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he bit his lips swallowing the pain.

Once the boys were done with him, he was left all alone. Luhan dragged his battered body up, wincing in pain. Each step he took was jolting pain straight up his body. His ankles were throbbing. They must’ve fractured both his ankles. His right arm was jutting out in an odd angle, dislocated. Luhan didn’t need a mirror to know how broken he was.

Thunder roared from above. Lightning flashed, illuminating the darkening sky. Strong gusts of wind blew wildly. Luhan pushed on until he reached his destination. The old oak tree. Luhan huddled under tree, the last place Sehun was alive. If he was to die that day, Luhan wanted the oak tree to be the place he lets out his last breath. He tucked his knees to his chest and wrapped his fingers around the pendant.

“Sehun-ah, why aren’t you protecting me like you promised?” his voice cracked. Droplets of water splashed on his creased uniform.  A sudden flash of lighting shook Luhan to his core.

“Hyung,” a familiar voice called him gently. “Don’t cry,” a hand was held out in front of him with a handkerchief.

Luhan shifted his gaze upwards and caught a glimpse of red hair. The flashes of lightning blinded him, each time, he saw flashes of red hair. This time lightning flashed brightly before his eyes and he say the face of the person he loved most. Sehun.

“ Sehun,” Luhan whispered in a daze. The boy was standing before him. Sehun crouched in front of Luhan and wiped his tears away. His touches were feather-light.

Luhan stared at the boy. Was he really Luhan’s Sehun? Or was he a figment of Luhan’s cruel imagination? This Sehun looked ethereal. There was a weird soft glow about him. His smile was till the same, warm and sweet but there was a strange kind of brilliance when he smiled. It was blinding, just like the flashes of lightning. Dazzling. Intense.

“I promised to protect you,” Sehun’s voice had the same raspy quality during his last moments. “This is me keeping my promise.”

Luhan was puzzled. Confusion swept across his mind.

“Come with me, Luhan hyung,” Sehun held his hand out once more.

And Luhan took it without a moment’s hesitation. A beautiful smile was etched on his face.

Pink was beginning to tint is cheeks once more along with the red, blue and purple.

“A young man in his late teens was found dead after being struck by lightning when he sought refuge under an old oak tree. The police classified the case as unnatural death. It rather was unfortunate for him. An autopsy was done and the police found out that he had been inflicting physical pain on himself just before he died. Friends say that he suffered from a psychological disorder where he can’t seem to differentiate between fantasy and reality.”

“Luhan is nice and caring but he’s weird. He thinks that Sehun and Jongin is real even though they aren’t.”  

Okay so firstly, hi. I basically had this story in my mind for days. I kinda wrote this sneakily. (My o'levels are round the corner) Hunhan was my first OTP nad i fell for them once again.

if you guys don't understand, Luhan doesn't have freinds. Real friends. Sehun, Jongdae, Chanyeol, Jongin, Sehun's parents, the attackers and Lay aren't real. They are just Luhan's imagination. There wasn't a real funeral. Everything was made up.

anyways, i won't be updating for a moth due to exams.. so yeah.

thanks for reading! subscribe, vote, comment. (7000+ word count)