Again, he wrapped his arms around my waist and smiling. I just flow with the wave and smiling too.

The fans would cry and shout out loud with it. Fanservice.

Yeah… it just fanservice for him.

We used to do it, though.

No. if you think he just did it to me, you’re wrong. Definitely wrong.

There is another one who would be in his embrace and even kissed by him. It’s not only me who can feel his warm arms around my waist.

He is so naïve, or stupid if I can call.

 He is playing around with my heart for doing this, even I know that he just doing his job as an entertainer. But he shouldn’t make me feel it like we’re couple. Because we are not on that relationship.

But his touch is too much to resist and too strong to call as just a fanservice.

“Hey, you’re acting weird. What are you thinking about?”

And again, that arms wrapped my waist when he sat next to me on the couch.

“Stop hugging me like this when we aren’t on the stage.” I stood up from the seat and heading to my bedroom. Throwing my body on the soft bed and lifted the blanket until it covering my head.

I want to be alone. I just can’t figuring out what I feel right now. I am just so upset.

 

Knock knock..!!!

 

“Can I come? Did you have a fight with Myungsoo again?”

I don't want to answer that question, the question from the guy who always be another one who get embraced by him.

Am I jealous?

I don’t know. And I don't want to know now.

“Hey, it’s our room too. How can you do this to us. HEY..!!! Myongsoo yelled and knocked the door roughly.

“I think that he need to be alone. We can sleep on the couch or on the floor together.”

MWOYA..!!! they want to spend the night together? Just two of them? ANDWEE..!!!

I immediately run toward the door and open it up. I can see them holding hands each other and heading to the living room. !!

They turned toward me and not wasted time to take their way to the bed. They lay there together, I pout when there’s not enough place for me.

“I want in the middle.” I yelled out loud, too childish. Yeah… I know, it’s me.

I jumped between them and closed my eyes quickly, not giving them time to protest.

“Yakk..! maknae, what’s wrong with you?” I heard Myungsoo spoke and poked me on the cheek, but I slapped his hand from my soft and flawless skin away.

Yes, I’m the maknae. The younger, and the one who can act to be so childish in this place, on our dorm.

“Shut up. I wanna sleep.”

I can feel that they were looking each other before asleep. They have been so close lately, and i-

“Are you slept already?”

I heard a soft whisper on my right ear, that was him.

I turning to the right and facing him. Gazing him with my irritate look.

“Wae?” I asked coldly. Not bothered to call his name or call him ‘hyung’ like usually I did.

“Tsk. Am I did something wrong?” he asked with worried look as caressing my cheek.

“No.”

“So, why you acted cold and not talking much like this?” he still pressed me with his question.

“I wanna sleep.” I discharge the case and turning so my back was facing him now.

“Good night then.” He kissed my head slightly, made my body shivered from his last touch.

 

We have some schedule for today. But isn’t that hard, because we will back at the dorm in 7 pm.

My eyes still stuck on him who talk during our interview. I sat next to him, and so with the other one, you know who I was talking about.

During the interview they seem so closes and laughing together. But I hold myself not to sheet my tears there. I just smile and act normally. Be as normal as I can.

But you know, it’s hard and hurting me to no end.

 

 

All of us were exiting the building with relieve, finally we could spend the night normally. Not normally for our life as INFINITE but normal enough for our life as a young man. We need time to hang out with our friend, since lately all we did just practice, attending some interview, concert and bla bla bla..

“I’m so happy because we aren’t going to practice tonight. You know, I’m so tired with all of our schedule this week.” I rolled my eyes to hear about Woohyun hyung complaining. Sometimes he can be so noisy.

“Sungjongie-ya, you want to eat some ice cream?” asked Myungsoo hyung.

I took my index finger on my chin, pretending to think. Just pretending, because I will accept that request immediately when I’m not in my mad state. But since I was mad toward him, I took some time to ‘think’. Is it a strange that I be mad with no reason?

But whatever, I paused a few seconds before looked up to nodding my head.

“My threat. Come on.”

He grabbed my wrist as drag me to the ice cream’s store. I my lips when too many ice cream that catch my attention. Made my stomach grumbled.

“Your threat right?” I asked and he nod with smile on his face.

“I want that chocolate, and vanilla almond. Ah, and that choco mix is look delicious too. Just that.” I head to the dining table after picked the most expensive ice cream in this place.

I was looking him from where I sitting and he seem so nervous. Funny L.

“H-here your ice cream.” He put the ice creams on our table, but he has none for him.

“You wanna some.” I asked when he just looking at me who eating my ice cream eagerly and hungrily.

“No. gomawo. I will be back, just wait a minute.” He leaving me then heading to the kitchen of this store. I frowned when the owner look like he will murder Myungsoo hyung in any minutes.

But after Myungsoo hyung speak something that I don’t know, the owner nodding his head.

What are they talked about?

Aissh.. that’s not even my business. I continue my eating and emptying the bowl before my lips in pleasant. The ice creams was so delicious. I love it. And I love Myung- Hell NO..!!! what am I thinking?

I shook my head repeatedly before I felt a hand through my hair, and messing it gently, or can I call it as caressing.

No…

“You okay?” I look up at him and seeing his smiling face.

“Nde.. nan gwenchana.”

Why I felt that my cheek burning.

“Let’s go back to our dorm then. Wait, you have a chocolate on your lips.” He said and leaned in me.

But before he can do anything that my mind had predicted, I run away. Yes, I ran away to the alleyway just like a stupid boy.

“Sungjong, hey! Wait!” I heard he shouted.

I won’t to falling deeper on his tempting. He just playing with me.

“Hey, wait!”

He grabbed my arms and turned me to face him. He panting hard from the running time, just like me.

“What? Stop playing on me! I won’t to have a wrong feeling toward you, hyung.” I don’t know why my voice so shaking.

“Play? Feeling? W-what do you mean? You mean that you- you like me?” Myungsoo hyung’s shocked face appearing when I nodding my head.

“Nde, naneun jhoa-haseo.” I almost whispering to said that word. I’m not ready for the answer and the judgment look that will make me down. Or even a disgusting gaze that will make me crying and end up killing myself.

“S-sungjong.”

“Mianhe. Can you just forge-“

Before I finished my word, that warm arms held my body tightly. 

Oh God. He hugging me! For his sake, he hugging me… umma..

Should I hug him back?

 I began to lift my hands to hug him back.

“Sorry.“

That word, the one word that I will hate for my entire life spread out from his mouth. I dropped my hand before it can reach his back.

“But I already have someone..”

Stop that… please, don’t you continue that word. It made my chest tightened and my vision blurry because of tears.

“Who is that?”

Damn! My curiosity took over my mind. I won’t hear that… please.. can you stop that or God, can you told to my heart for stop beating. I thought that it will be better like that, so I wouldn’t have to feel any pain.

“He is..”

Please stop it, I won’t hear about the named of your –what you called him- boyfriend.

“Sungyeol.”

My heart is pounding too fast, even my vision now seem so blurry. The pain still pinned in my chest.

So, this is the end? Should I end it with cut my wrist or hung my body up on the tree. Or drink some poisons? I will think about it later. I just won’t to see him with another one in front of my face. That’s hurt when he decide to choose him.

 

 

 

 

A/N : how about it…??? Is it horrible..??? Just comment then.