Can we go back to the time where we first met? It’s a bit of a sad thing that we can’t go back to that time when we loved each other.

 

Myungsoo firsts sees Sungyeol when he’s only three. He didn’t understand why there was a really handsome boy with a fish tail in the pool of his new house. Neither does he understand how the creature disappears immediately after he runs back from calling his parents. Myungsoo was too young to understand anything, but he heard enough from his parent’s bed time’s stories to know that the creature belonged in the little mermaid. Because no matter how many years pass, Myungsoo still remembers how enchanting the creature was.

 

The second time they meet is in one of myungsoo’s secret caves hidden away from sight but near enough to the sea. Myungsoo just wanted a place where he could be alone, where he didn’t need to pretend, where he could think peacefully without the mindless chatter of the people around him. Myungsoo was just really sick and tired of being called the ice prince. Myungsoo was laying his head on the cool stone of the cave wall when he hears a splashing sound but his feet where a pool is. He didn’t know that it was connected to the sea. Myungsoo is really surprised when a head pops out from beneath the turquoise surface, and he is even more surprised when he recognizes the face of the person as the creature he saw in his pool thirteen years ago. What made it three times more surprising was that it seemed as if the creature had not aged at all even after so many years. He was as enchanting as ever, caramel brown hair that appeared dry even though he had been underwater seconds ago, and hypnotizing eyes that made Myungsoo want to stare into them forever. But unlike him, Myungsoo has changed, into a cold expressionless boy.

 

Myungsoo is 16 when he finally meets the creature again.

 

Sungyeol lets out a dolphin pitched squeak and attempts to dive back down into the water, but Myungsoo is too fast. He’s not going to let go, not after he has finally seen him again after so many years. He grabs the merman by his wrist and yanks him back up to the surface.

 

“Don’t run away.” He says, and Sungyeol is shocked by the emotionless yet demanding tone. He frowns, how dare a mere human command him, but something about the young boy makes him stay. Maybe it was the fact that he has been watching this boy for the past thirteen years since they saw each other in myungsoo’s pool. Sungyeol didn’t want to come off as a creep, but it was the truth that he has always been observing Myungsoo from afar all these years. He has watched Myungsoo transform form a cheerful bubbly child into a stoic and cold yet beautiful teenage boy. And somewhere in between, he has fallen in love with the beautiful human.

 

My eyes naturally follow you each step you take

 

They do nothing but stare into each other eyes for the next few minutes.

 

“You.” Myungsoo whispers, as if he was afraid that the merman might be scared away by him.

 

“You.” Sungyeol echoes.

 

“I’ve seen you before.”

 

“No you haven’t.”

 

“I have! Why don’t you seem changed?” Myungsoo asks curiously.

 

Because I’m am your eternal Peter Pan, your man who has stopped in time

 

“So what if we have met?” Sungyeol challenges.

 

“What’s your name?”

 

“Why should I tell you?”

 

“Because I want to know.”

 

“Let go of me.” Sungyeol attempts to pry Myungsoo’s fingers of his wrist.

 

“Fine, but only if you don’t swim away.”

 

“Fine.” Sungyeol concedes, truthfully, he wants to get close to the object of his affection, but he’s afraid, afraid of what will happen when Myungsoo realizes.

 

Myungsoo removes his fingers from Sungyeol’s wrist gently, slowly watching to see if the merman would swim away. But he needn’t have worry. Sungyeol lifts himself out of the water, arm muscles rippling as he does so. Myungsoo can’t help but stare. He can’t stop staring at how defined Sungyeol’s arms and upper torso are; neither can he tear his gaze away from those shimmering emerald green scales. Sungyeol has a really huge tail he thinks, and it was really enchanting.

 

“Stop staring at my tail.” Sungyeol squirms uncomfortably under the sharp gaze of the teenager.

 

“It’s really beautiful.” Myungsoo says in awe, and Sungyeol blushes.

 

Myungsoo finally looks up from Sungyeol’s tail to stare up at the merman. “I’m Myungsoo.”

 

I know. Ever since I set my gaze on you.

 

“I’m Sungyeol.” Sungyeol replies reluctantly, allowing Myungsoo to graze his fingers (almost reverently) across his scales.

 

Myungsoo is seventeen when he realizes that he has fallen in love with Sungyeol.  Ever since they met in the cave, Myungsoo has started escaping to the cave daily just to see Sungyeol, to be himself, to talk freely. Sungyeol was a really good listener, he let Myungsoo say anything he wanted and never judged. Sungyeol meets him every day, and some days, he would even gift Myungsoo with a beautiful shell from his homeland. Myungsoo keeps them hidden away in his secret drawer where all his prized possessions are. It is because of Sungyeol that Myungsoo’s icy exterior starts melting away. He realizes that maybe, he shouldn’t be hiding his true self from the world, and there was no point in keeping up with his ice prince appearance. It was just too tiring, he wanted to be himself.

His change doesn’t go unnoticed by Sungyeol when Myungsoo chats excitedly about the new friends he made in school, the way Myungsoo face lits up when he speaks of how amazing his school life has become. He knows that his change is because of Sungyeol, and he loves sungyeol, just because.

 

When you smile, sun shines, the brilliance can’t be expressed with the boundaries of language. But now your smile will be seen by everyone, and not just me. But I can’t be selfish, because I will be gone soon.

 

Myungsoo is also 17, when he gives his first kiss to Sungyeol. Sungyeol tastes like the sea, salty yet fresh, like taking a deep breath of clean air after being trapped underwater. Myungsoo discovers that he really likes kissing Sungyeol. He will never get tired of kissing Sungyeol and the same could be said for Sungyeol. Myungsoo tastes like chocolate and love with a hint of tangy mystery that makes Myungsoo so attractive to the rest of the world including Sungyeol. Myungsoo is the first human that has attracted Sungyeol and the first and last human that Sungyeol would fall in love with.

 

Starting from that time I gained your heart and even a kiss, my heart was always flying while riding a cloud. You were prettier than Wendy, Cinderella or any other princesses.

 

Every minute they spent together was like being in paradise, the joy that came from merely being with the person you loved the most was so overwhelming. Often, Myungsoo would find himself staring at Sungyeol, admiring his good looks. On the other hand, Sungyeol stared at Myungsoo because he wants to imprint Myungsoo's beautiful image in his mind forever, so that he will never forget how Myungsoo looks like.
 

Sungyeol is proud of himself for bringing Myungsoo’s smile back but he knows that he can’t be with Myungsoo forever.

You see, being the crown prince of the underwater world has its downsides too. Sungyeol's parents expect him to marry the neighboring sea's daughter. Sungyeol will have to spend the rest of his eternal life with her. But Sungyeol doesn't voice this to Myungsoo because he doesn't want to worry the younger. He just hopes that when he leaves, Myungsoo will still be able to live happily.
 

As the days lead up to Sungyeol's marriage, Sungyeol got more and more depressed. He waits for Myungsoo at their usual cave and each time he kisses Myungsoo, Myungsoo can taste the desperateness and helplessness but he daren't asks. 
 

When Sungyeol disappears on the exact day they first met, fifteen years ago, Myungsoo doesn't understand. He waited the whole night for Sungyeol, but Sungyeol never appears. Sungyeol also doesn’t realize that the words he left for Myungsoo in the form of shells had been swept away by the high tide during noon. It was as if Sungyeol disappeared without a trace left behind.
 

Maybe he's just too busy to visit me is what Myungsoo thinks at first. But after two weeks, Myungsoo realizes that maybe, Sungyeol is never coming back. Myungsoo is eighteen when Sungyeol disappears.

 

 Myungsoo is also nearly eighteen when he cries for the person he truly loves for the first time.
 

Even after Sungyeol is married, he continues to observe Myungsoo, but he never reveals himself. Many a times Myungsoo has this feeling that maybe, just maybe he could feel Sungyeol's presence. But every time he calls out for Sungyeol, he is only met with silence. Their cave is the only place in which Myungsoo allows himself to break down. Even though sungyeol may not appear to be there, myungsoo still finds it comforting talking out loud in the cave, as if he was talking to Sungyeol. At the end of the day after he has finish relieving his words, Myungsoo would look around the cave forlornly, wishing that Sungyeol could be here to give him a much needed hug. Even if it meant Myungsoo would have his clothes smelling like the sea.  Myungsoo loves yet hates the scent of the sea because it reminds him of Sungyeol so much.
 

I’m still trembling the part of my heart that you’re not in this place is a lonely island (The me from that time)


On Myungsoo's 18th birthday, he finds a beautiful conch shell sitting on the edge of the pool that is in the middle of the cave. Myungsoo blinks once, twice. Nobody knows about the cave except for Sungyeol and him, the only person who could have left the shell was Sungyeol. 
 

"Sungyeol! Yeol! Are you here?! Please answer me!" Myungsoo cries out as he gathers the shell in both his palm carefully, tears welling up in his eyes as he receives silence once again. Myungsoo sees something glittering in the shell and tips it over. A necklace slides out, a slim silver chain with a emerald green scale pendant. It's too beautiful and exquisite to have been crafted by the human's crude hands. It must be the craft of a merman. And the pendant, the color and texture could only mean one thing; it was one of Sungyeol's scales. Myungsoo knew how important each and every scale was to a mer-creature and Sungyeol giving him one of his scales was just too much for Myungsoo to bear. Myungsoo sobs as he fastens the chain around the neck, the only item that links him to Sungyeol now besides the vast collection of shells. Myungsoo spends the last few hours of his birthday in the cave. Wishing for sungyeol up till the last tick of the day, till it struck midnight marking the end of his birthday. With heaviness in his heart, Myungsoo leaves the cave.

 

At that place while looking at each other, were we smiling?

 

Somewhere deep down in the sea, sungyeol smiles through his tears. 
He knows that the present was worth it although his father had been greatly angered when he discovered that one of Sungyeol's scale was missing. 
 

"You foolish brat, you gave up one of your scales for a mere human." the king snarls.

 

"I would willingly lose more of them even if it means that my lifespan would shorten." Sungyeol retorts.

 

"You insolent fool! You better not breathe a word about this to anyone else." the king warns.

 

And of course Sungyeol's wife notices but she wisely chooses not to mention it.

 

 

Even though Myungsoo’s heart breaks, he knows that Sungyeol wouldn’t want him to be the ice prince he was before; he would want Myungsoo to remain cheerful and happy. Myungsoo does just that, but every day, Myungsoo visits the cave everyday. He knows Sungyeol won’t be there, but he still goes and sometimes, he might see a shell resting on the edge of the pool of shimmering blue and Myungsoo can’t help but to cry. His tears disappearing into the expanse of turquoise.

 

You’re the one person who made my heart pound. As soon as I felt you, my eyes shone. But now you’re gone.

 

Myungsoo is twenty-one when he stops coming to the cave. Sungyeol knows but he can’t do anything but to cry silently in his deep blue sea. Because he can never cross the boundary between them. Myungsoo was a beautiful human while he himself had a duty towards the sea.

 

Because I feel you, the one person that makes my heart beat, my two eyes shine.  You that is written in my memories pretty boy that won’t get erased!
 

 

But what Sungyeol doesn’t know is Myungsoo will never forget him. Myungsoo never takes off the necklace for the rest of his life,
 reminding  himself everyday of the merman he fell in love with, keeping it close to his heart and hidden away from sight under his clothes. Myungsoo never gets married, but he has the friends that he made because of Sungyeol, and he is contented to live his life alone, with the help of his memories with Sungyeol.

 

I recall the pictures that I lived with you, forgetting the little trembling that splurge in my body. My heart is still beating the one part of my heart that you’re not in (Where could you be).

 

Myungsoo never stops loving for Sungyeol and neither does Sungyeol stop loving Myungsoo. But Sungyeol would continue to love Myungsoo for thousands of years more.

 

So when Myungsoo joins the angels many years later, it’s too much for Sungyeol to bear and he goes along with Myungsoo. Because there’s no point in living if Myungsoo isn’t around anymore.

 

It’s not going to be the end of our story. Because I’m going to meet you again. Maybe, in our next life.
 

 

 

 

 

 

A/N: edited this with Block B's new song Be The Light on repeat... bad move girlll TT__TT