What starts as a hopeless action usually backfires dangerously. However, desperation is what leads to that. The appearance of a streak of hope, no matter how faint it might be, makes people irrational.

 

Going to a shark loaner was the last thing you ever thought of doing, but having to pay for your college’s tuition, you couldn’t but go with it.

 

You were the kind of people who worked hard to save up the money for college, but when your friend asked to borrow some money from you, you couldn’t help but lend her the money.

 

That was what led you to getting in debt in the first place.

 

You really thought that your friend would pay you back soon so that you can pay off your debt, but when she traveled away and cut all sorts of connections, you ended up being in trouble for it.

 

Living in fear for weeks, you started going carefully to college every day. You started taking different routes back to your studio apartment in case someone was following you. You even bought new locks for the windows and the doors.

 

You knew that sooner or later, they would come after you. Living alone had that disadvantage. Not having someone by your side scared you even more but made you even relieved too that no one would get hurt because of you.

 

Today, you were walking back home accompanied by your lab partner Myungsoo. He was the first person you became friends with when you entered college and even after a year, he remained your friend.

 

Developing a crush on him was anything but unexpected. Such a handsome man with a cute smile and unique personality had women head over heels in love with him. Everywhere you walked, girls would stop to look at him.

 

The number of confessions he got in a year was quite unbelievable. He was the center of attention, guys were jealous of him; teachers were amused and even slightly affected by his charms.

 

He was that kind of guys that seemed to have it all.

 

However as you spent more time with him, you got to know him more and see deeper sides of his personality that he didn’t particularly show to everyone.

 

His passion for photography always dazzled you. He was so passionate that it showed in his work.

 

Sometimes after classes, you’d accompany him to his favorite places. You’d give him advice about the angles and the best the shots. He started getting dependent on your opinion that he started coming back to you every now and then before he published his photos in any magazine.

 

It was a hobby that managed to get him some money as well. He had no intentions of pursuing it as a job, but he still enjoyed being appreciated for it.

 

Not breaking your weekly routine, this time Myungsoo and you walked to the newly built bridge. It was known for its unique design and Myungsoo insisted on taking photos of it.

 

The bridge wasn’t open yet for cars so you both ran on it standing in different areas trying to take pictures within the lens’ reach.

 

After an hour of walking along the bridge, you started growing tired. You sat on the floor leaning your back and head against the wall of the bridge.

 

“You rest here and I’ll continue taking pictures.” Myungsoo said obviously still not tried.

 

You watched him walking away from you; you loved how he was so dedicated to it. He had a policy to never rest till he finished his work well.

 

You were so mesmerized looking at him that your eyes started closing on their own accord. The fleeting breeze made cradled you as you drifted to sleep. The last image on your mind was of him leaning against the bridge’s edge his side profile was as perfect as ever and he looked just beautiful doing what he loves.

 

It seemed like a long time when you finally opened your eyes. It was such a good sleep, you felt rested and relaxed, although you noticed the sun was only setting now.

 

You looked around you not finding Myungsoo anywhere in your sight. You got up wiping the dirt off your .

 

It was getting colder now the sun was setting, you rubbed your arms hoping the friction would cause you to warm up.

 

You were lost in thought that you didn’t notice anything. You were still wondering where Myungsoo went.

 

Arms grabbing you from the back startled you. You didn’t even have the chance to turn around or even scream. The clutch was so strong that you already felt your bones breaking.

 

Before you could get your bearings together, another set of arms grabbed your legs lifting you off the ground.

 

“Stop resisting or we might end up killing you.” A really cold voice murmured in your ear.

 

You realized now what that was all about. No matter how careful you tried to be, you still failed to outsmart them.

 

Even though you were in danger, you couldn’t but help Myungsoo was far away so that he wouldn’t get into any kind of danger because of you.

 

 

You felt a rough piece of fabric pressing against your eyes blinding you from the last streaks of sunlight.

 

The men let you down once he noticed you weren’t resisting anymore. Your body ached when it hit the ground with a thud, yet you remained silent.

 

You felt the air moving when they stood in front of you.

 

“Now, where’s the money.” Another voice said.

 

“I don’t have any.” Your voice quivered in a whisper.

 

You could feel someone crouching down in front of you.

 

“Such a pretty face…” a finger swiped across your cheek. “Too bad we can’t but make you pay in another way.” He faked disappointment.

 

Your heart was thudding so loudly screaming at you to do something. The fear was immobilizing you that your words weren’t understandable.

 

“Please.” You tried to beg.

 

“Please what?” The first voice said. “We gave you a chance of three months. We didn’t come looking for you to give you the chance, but now, you’re already late.”

 

“I… really…don’t have any money!” You stuttered trying your best not to cry.

 

You heard a snicker from one of them. You could tell there were three men there and that scared you even more.

 

It hit you out of nowhere, one second you were trying to think of a plan, the next you felt a fist colliding with your right cheek.

 

You yelled in pain as the blow of the punch threw you on the floor. You wanted to try to get up, but your hands were tied and you were completely blind by now.

 

“Where is my money?” The quietest voice said.

 

You could taste the blood in your mouth and that made it even harder for you to speak for yourself.

 

When you didn’t reply, a sudden pain pierced through your ribs. One of them hit you with his foot making a yelp of pain escape your lips.

 

You lay there not fighting or screaming at them. For some reason, you didn’t want to resist them.

 

“If you don’t give us anything, you know you won’t survive today, right?” The boss said so calmly.

 

You didn’t even try saying anything. They didn’t believe you in the first place and wasting the remaining air you had wasn’t worth it.

 

Seconds passed yet they seemed like days. You could tell the sun had set already even with your eyes blindfolded.

 

“Throw her.” The boss commanded. Instantly, you were carried from your spot on a broad shoulder.

 

You weren’t wondering anymore where Myungsoo was, but you really wished you could hear his voice again. You wished you could tell him how you felt and not be a coward like before.

 

You imagined his smile, his voice, his words, his frown, and his touch. You imagined it all. The image of him leaning against the bridge taking pictures jumped into your memory making you tear up and sob quietly.

 

You could feel yourself dangling now. You knew that once you hit the water, you would have no chance of surviving in the first place.

 

“Any last words?” You could hear the snicker in his voice and you cursed at him in your mind wishing he’d end up in the worst kind of scenario.

 

You could feel his hot breath against your cold neck when he leaned closer.

 

“I know you don’t have any money, that’s why you’re paying for it this way.” He whispered.

 

You gritted your teeth not wanting to give him the satisfaction of crying or begging.

 

When you said nothing, he moved away.

 

Good thing it happened fast, you didn’t want to be ready for it. You just felt the air striking your face as you fell facedown.

 

The hit was too sudden; the cold water attacked your body like daggers and you could feel every bone in your body hurting.

 

It took you a while to realize that pain meant you were still alive! Water was entering your nose and mouth, you couldn’t fight it anymore, you needed air and instead of getting that, you were sinking even further instead.

 

Your lungs felt full; each second passing was an immediate stab to your lungs and heart. Your body was failing you, even though you lost the will to live, it still tried hard to remain functioning.

 

You didn’t know what was happening inside of you, but you were imagining a scene of the Titanic when the ship started sinking. It was a really ironic situation, instead of praying and thinking of your happiest moments, you were remembering the saddest movie you ever watched.

 

The pain was unbearable; you just wished it would end soon. You didn’t want to remain alive anymore, remaining alive meant feeling more pain.

 

You started drifting away sinking even deeper with each of pain. Then the pain stopped and you knew your body decided to give up as well.

 

You closed your eyes surrendering to your destiny; it was evitable now and no matter what, you didn’t want to live your last moments full of sadness.

 

Then it was blackness.

 

You didn’t know death could be like that; so cold. It felt so cold as if the wind was blowing at you.

 

Your back ached for some reason but you couldn’t remember why. Your eyes were still closed depending on the other senses.

 

“Wake up.” A faint voice said. It sounded familiar but you couldn’t place it. The voice was repeating the same words over and over again. Maybe it was your imagination, but it was getting louder.

 

“Hey! Wake up! Please!” The voice begged. It was a haze, you couldn’t reply to the voice. You couldn’t open your mouth or open your eyes.

 

You were trapped inside your own mind. The voice felt like a part of your thoughts as well so you decided to ignore it.

 

Sudden touches on your chest and body made you shudder, the hands were so cold against your dead skin.

 

You wished that person would stop touching you.

 

That person went against your wishes and started pressing on your chest repeatedly.

 

“I said wake up!” The voice said once again.

 

The voice was too familiar, why couldn’t you remember it?

 

The person touching you started touching you even more. The coldness spread to your face and neck.

 

The hands were opening your mouth forcing you to move against your body’s wishes.

 

The sudden warmth on your face contrasted with the coldness seeping into your body.

 

The warmth turned into fire spreading on your frozen lips. You couldn’t savor the moment of warmth before it left you.

 

It came back again blowing into you.

 

You wanted to remain like that; the heat was much too comforting after the pain and the cold.

 

A sudden cough rose within you. You felt your body jolting and reacting to the touches and the heat.

 

Your chest hurt once again, your already opened mouth was spitting out the water that was stored in you.

 

You coughed harshly due to the sharp intakes of air. It felt so refreshing yet so torturing.

 

Your eyes opened on their accord seeking light and familiarity. You couldn’t register what you were seeing it was too dark and bare.

 

“THANK GOD!” The voice yelled. It took you a while to notice the voice belonged to Myungsoo.

 

“I’m not dead?” Your voice came out raspy.

 

“No, no, no you’re not.” Myungsoo pushed the words grabbing your shoulders he hugged you tightly.

 

Although that action hurt your already aching body, it felt comforting and reassuring.

 

You wanted to cry, you wanted to yell after remembering the previous events but you were too happy to do that.

 

You were alive! And In Myungsoo’s arms!

 

“I’ll take you to the hospital.” Myungsoo got up carrying you in his arms.

 

It was now that you noticed he was drenched in water too. His hair was sticking to his forehead and his nose was red.

 

“What about them?” You asked not wanting to refer to them in a different way.

 

“The police was on the way,” he looked up towards the bridge where now the police lights were breaking the darkness. “I didn’t have time to deal with them I just came after you immediately.”

 

You nodded acknowledging his words. It hurt to move or talk so you remained silent till he walked all the way to the police cars.

 

The policemen acted immediately, they put you in one of the cars. Myungsoo sat next to you as one of the policemen drove you to the hospital.

 

You were drifting off to sleep but Myungsoo kept talking you making you remain awake.

 

The journey to the hospital was a short one, as soon as the car parked; the nurses came rushing towards you.

 

You were carried inside carefully yet quickly at the same time. Myungsoo stayed with you matching the nurses’ pace.

 

Once inside the emergency room, the doctor examined you warily. As it seemed, you had a few broken bones and you were still not aware enough of what went on because of the blow from the fall.

 

You loved how Myungsoo stayed by your side the whole time; he just looked at you over and over again worriedly. He kept asking the doctors questions on your behalf as if totally intending to take care of you till you got better.

 

It wasn’t up to you how you fell asleep. You were staring at Myungsoo talking but then your eyes closed and you were sleeping.

 

You kept on waking up every few minutes to hear the commotion of it all. It was still night and the nurses were trying their best to cast the broken bones.

 

The last time you woke up, it was pretty quite then and dark again.

 

The dim light came from the table lamp on your left. You lay there staring at the ceiling remembering it all.

 

The events of the previous hours seemed fictional; you couldn’t believe you almost drowned.

 

You tried getting up but then you realized your legs were too heavy. You touched your head to notice it was also wrapped tightly.

 

You groaned hating how immobile you were.

 

“What are you trying to do?” Myungsoo’s voice startled you.

 

He was sitting on the couch by the corner of the room staring at you. He was leaning forward with his hands clutched tightly.

 

Even though it was dim, you could see his eyes. They had the same intense look but this time, they were hooded with sleepiness.

 

“I want water.” You murmured.

 

He got up moving towards you. He filled a glass of water for you before handing it.

 

“Drink slowly.” He said.

 

You gave him the glass back after taking a sip.

 

“Are you ok?” You asked him.

 

“Just sleepy.” He replied stifling a yawn.

 

“Then sleep.” You said.

 

“The couch isn’t comfy.” He shrugged.

 

You moved to the side of the bed lifting the covers, “come sleep here then.” You said looking at him shyly.

 

He looked at you before he nodded and put himself under the covers.

 

You both lay on your backs staring up awkwardly.

 

“I’m glad you’re alive.” He whispered.

 

“I’m glad you came for me.” You whispered back.

 

He remained silent apparently remembering the events as well.

 

“Where were you?” You asked suddenly. “I woke up and I couldn’t find you.”

 

“I went to the electronics shop to recharge my camera, I sent you a message but you didn’t check your phone.” He replied quietly.

 

The silence dragged on after his words left his mouth. You didn’t understand why you both were awkward with each other, it felt like a surreal moment for you to be lying in bed next to him putting aside the circumstances.

 

“Is it true?” He mumbled in your ear turning slowly.

 

“What?” You breathed.

 

“You were saying things while you were asleep. I just want to know if they’re true or not.” He said as quietly as possible.

 

You fiddled with your fingers nervously not knowing how to reply.

 

“It depends on what I said.” Your heart was thudding so fast in your ears now, you were sure he could hear it too.

 

“You said you loved me.” He stated almost nonchalantly.

 

“And that shocked you?” You said.

 

“Yeah.” He replied not looking at you.

 

“I’m not going to answer you, you choose whatever you want to believe.” You murmured turning your head to the side.

 

The movement coming from his side made the bed rattle. He rested his body on his arm as he looked at you.

 

“So, no matter what I believe it has to be real?” He asked as quietly as possible.

 

You closed your eyes nodding. You were afraid that he would choose to not believe it. And even if he did, you were scared of you what was to come next.

 

It was a déjà vu moment; you felt the warmth on your face before his lips even landed on yours.

 

He pressed his lips tightly against yours making you shudder from the feeling once again.

 

It felt even better now that you were experiencing it with you being conscious. His perfect lips molded themselves against yours making you lose your breath and train of thought.

 

Moments later, he moved away to stare at you. His other hand was on your cheek it lightly.

 

“I love you too.” He murmured his lips still very close to yours.

 

Your eyes filled with tears at the sound of his words. You were hoping it was a dream. You were hoping that even if it were a dream, you’d never wake up.

 

“The moment I realized I almost lost you and couldn’t be by your side, that was the moment I prayed for you to live so that I can tell you how I feel. I wanted to tell you for too long but I took your existence for granted.” He wiped the spilling tears from you’re the corner of your eyes. “Now, I know I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t know how much longer each of us will live, and I want to spend the last moment with you. I want to spend all the time with you, you’re the one I love the most and I want to protect you always.”

 

The tears were hard to control now, you were sure now that it was a mere dream.

 

“I love you a lot.” You said at last.

 

He smiled softly at you kissing your temple and pulling you closer towards him.

 

“Next time you borrow money, be sure to borrow from me only. I’ll be your bank.” He mumbled to your hair.

 

You giggled softly nodding your head.

 

You lay in his arms feeling the warmth that brought you back to life. It was the best feeling in the world being able to be with him while knowing he was yours now.

 

Desperation led you to that situation, however, you couldn’t even regret anything. You believed that it all happened for a reason, and maybe it happening this way allowed Myungsoo to come to realize how much he cherished you and loved you.