I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t extremely attracted to the incredibly handsome Chinese boy sitting at the table across the cafeteria.

I’ve always had this ‘thing’ for Chinese guys. I really don’t know why. In fact most of the time I didn’t even know they were Chinese until after I started liking them. Maybe I had a Chinese boy radar installed in my head. Maybe.

But that’s not the point.

What is the point is that I am madly infatuated with Zhang Yixing and today is the day that I decided I would approach him. And that is exactly what I am mentally preparing myself for at the moment.

You see, Zhang Yixing isn’t just any Chinese boy. Oh no.

He is beyond average.

Zhang Yixing is the top of his class in just about everything. Grades, guitar, sports, singing, dancing, looks, student council president, composing, did I mention dancing? He’s not a bad artist either.

You know the saying “jack of all trades, master of none”? Well whoever said that obviously never meant Zhang Yixing.

He’s what I like to call an all-rounder. Absolutely amazing at every single thing he tries his hand at.

He’s even a gentleman too.

And that makes him extremely popular with the ladies. All of them. I don’t think there’s a single girl who can resist his humble perfection, myself absolutely included.

But you see, what makes approaching Zhang Yixing so hard is that he doesn’t date. He has literally rejected, politely of course, every single girl who has ever approached him. And he has never approached a girl first.

A few jealous guys tried to spread rumors that it was because he’s gay. They transferred shortly after Zhang Yixing’s lovely fangirls had a ‘talk’ with them.

As much as I knew I was basically setting myself up for failure and rejection, I simply couldn’t contain my feelings any longer. I felt as though my heart was going to explode any day now if I had to keep all of this bottled up in my fragile heart.

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to relax myself, though it seemed as if nothing could quell my rapid heartbeat as the intoxicating feeling of adrenaline rushed through my veins.

I opened my eyes and slowly stood up from the random seat I had taken. I glanced over at the gorgeous boy, placing my hands on the table to steady myself. My breath caught in my throat and I suddenly saw him come closer into view. My feet seemed as though they were magically moving themselves, my body remaining frigid.

I had forgotten to breathe until I was standing right in front of the beautiful boy, when I involuntarily in a deep breath and unfortunately made a noise that somewhat resembled a fish gasping for water.

Zhang Yixing, who hadn’t even noticed me approaching, looked up at that moment. The noise seemed to have caught his attention and I guessed that he saw me make a very awkward face as he smiled and chuckled at me, looking directly into my soul. Or at least it felt like that.

His eyes crinkled at the edges and became crescents, his smile radiant as the sun. And his laugh, oh god his laugh. It was as if a choir of angels was singing especially for me.

I don’t know how much more my poor heart can take.

I could feel the blood rush to my face and my forehead become damp as I broke out in a cold sweat.

“How may I help you dear?” He asked gently; face slowly relaxing into a more neutral smile.

My hands began trembling slightly. I took a large gulp before even attempting to begin.

“O-oh well I, um-” I began nervously only to be interrupted by that angelic voice.

“Oh excuse me for interrupting but please do sit down.” My body immediately followed his command without question. He didn’t give a reason but I didn’t need one. Zhang Yixing wanting me to sit down across from him was reason enough.

He gave me a small smile as a sign to continue my explanation.

I took another gulp.

“W-well, I just came over h-here to t-tell you that I-” My voice suddenly stopped, caught in my throat. I couldn’t speak another word.

The overwhelming feeling of dread filled me. What was I even doing? Zhang Yixing would never accept my feelings and I knew that. So why was I still going to tell him? All I could accomplish with that is hurting myself. Was that really for the best?

“You…?” The beautiful boy asked, tilting his head slightly to the side with that charming small smile still decorating his face.

Maybe I shouldn’t…

“That I want to be your f-friend!” I blurted out randomly.

Zhang Yixing’s eyes suddenly widen and he moved back slightly, a total look of surprise dominating his delicate features as though that was the last thing he expected to hear from me.

I don’t blame him that was just about the last thing I expected to say too.

Being the amazing gentleman his is though, he quickly recomposed himself and wore his signature soft expression again, though surprise and curiosity still danced behind his eyes.

“My…friend?” He restated, seemingly asking for confirmation.

I couldn’t take it back now, he would think of me as more of a weirdo than he already does.

“Y-yes…” I shakily replied, my eyes darting to my hands that were folded together on the table.

It went completely silently, well as silent as a cafeteria can be, between us for a few moments. Though it felt like hours.  My heartbeat picked up with each passing moment and I could feel myself start to break out in a cold sweat again.

My hands were just starting to shake when that lovely voice spoke up. I hesitantly looked up at him.

“Well…” he began, awkwardly clearing his throat before continuing. “Can I be honest with you?”

I could only nod.

“Well, honestly, most of the time when girls approach me like this, they have a love confession prepared so I’m really surprised by your words…” he trailed off, looking down at the table.

My heart almost stopped that second. Almost.

“But…” he picked back, locking eyes with me. “I’m really glad you’re different.” He smiled shyly. “I don’t have many friends, so I would love to have you as a friend…”

“Harin.” I squeaked. He smiled broadly.

“Harin. You can call me Yixing…buddy.” He practically giggled at the last part. “Sorry, I’ve just never really been able to use that word before.” I swear he was blushing, but it may have been a trick of the light or my imagination.

“Well I’ll see you later, okay?” With that Zhang Yixing stood up and walked off, sending a quick wave my way on his way out.

And there I was, left at the table alone replaying what had just happened in my head.

I am now friends with the Zhang Yixing.

Friends.

I almost blushed at the words, but then a thought crossed my mind. Did I just get friend zoned?

“GOD DAMMIT!”