Tomorrow would be his birthday, that if he lived through today. It was rather scary to think about. That a person so young could die so early. It was the time in life when everything seemed possible, when your whole life where laying in front of your feet’s. Yet, a person so young and strong couldn’t win over cancer.

If this is what it takes to finally understand what true love is, to understand how much someone means to you. Then, it was almost that I wished that I never fell in love. But when I think back, on all the memories we shared together. It was worth it. I would never give away what we had just so that I wouldn’t feel pain. Because the love you gave me is so much greater than the pain will ever be.

“Da Sol?” Sung Yeol’s weak voice brought me out of my thoughts and I lifted my head and gazed at him. I asked him in a lowered tone what was wrong. “I want to show you something” his voice faded away at the end and he breathed hard. His lungs where starting to give away.

I looked at him with a wondering expression. And that’s when I noticed the two small boxes laying on the table next to the bed. I understood perfectly what it was. He tried to reach out for one of them. But I immediately told him that I could take it. I didn’t want to risk anything.

The look he gave me before I opened the box was heart-warming. I smiled instantly when I saw the ring. It was a cute heart shaped pink plastic ring, one of those you get for less than a 1000₩ in a vending machine. Carefully I picked it out from the box and slid it onto my ring finger. It fitted perfectly.

A few minutes later the alarm sounded. Sung Yeol had suddenly stopped breathing and I was hushed out from the room before they started to do CPR. I watched in shock how he laid there, not breathing, not moving.

I was scared, he couldn’t leave me now.

My prayers where answered, because he began to breathe again. I don’t think I’ve ever been that relieved before. Now I fully understood how fast he could disappear from me, and that made me cry. How could god do this to me? What had I ever done to earn this?

I saw how the doctor stepped out from the room and told me that I may go in again. I nodded in reply and quietly entered the room. He was firmly asleep so I just sat down on my chair and gently grabbed his hand. I had never pitied him, because that’s not what one should do. You should support and believe that everything will be okay. But right now. I pitied him, because everything was not going to be okay.

The nurses checked his condition more often now, twice every hour to be exact. But I where used to it. Having people walk in and out from the room constantly.

My eyelids started to get heavy, and the darkness that where slowly creping on didn’t help either. I wanted to sleep. But I didn’t want to risk falling asleep. I wanted to be there, together with Sung Yeol all the time.

“D-da Sol” I got so startled by hearing his voice that my heart jumped. I never thought he would wake up until tomorrow. Usually that’s what he always does after that the doctor has given him something to sleep on. Apparently that was not the case today.

“Ring” with an unsteady hand he pointed towards the other box, containing his ring. I hadn’t got the chance to slide it onto his finger before. His ring was blue and just like mine, it was shaped like a heart. With much carefulness I put it on his finger and then kissed his cheek.

He smiled gently as he told me that he loves me, and that he will forever do so. “I love you too” I squeezed his hand lightly as I smiled. This is exactly what makes everything worth it. To hear him say those three words that means so much.

“I want a kiss”

I stared at him, amazingly surprised. I never thought he would beg for something like that. Especially not right now. On the other hand, it wasn’t something that I had to think over. He was after all my boyfriend and I loved him.

Though, I blushed slightly as I bent down and pressed my lips against his. The response from him sent chills down my back and made my whole body tingle. A few seconds later I pulled away, he needed to breath. His lungs where over-working. “You have to promise me something” he stated once he had recalled his breath. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “What?” I took his hand in mine once again.

“That you will let me go once I leave; you need to think about the future, about school. You need to promise me that you will live on with life without me”

I had started crying. How could he expect me to promise him that? “I can’t promise you that” I blurted between my sobs. I couldn’t lie to him and tell him something that I might not keep. His eyes where filled with sorrow and plead.

“Please”

I looked away from his gaze. Why was he doing this?