The bus was going too fast at this point. I felt like I was on an off road even though we were already reaching Düsseldorf which meant my journey was over. I had already talked to my mum and my teachers. It was all planned. They were going to drop me off at Düsseldorf and then I would take the train to Solingen. A week after, they'd come around and pick me up. A week. I had a week to make her fall in love with me.

"So, like, who is this girl?" Max nudged me and smiled. His lips curled up to the left like a kitten's.

"Just someone..." I felt myself blushing. When I thought of her there was this heat coming from the left side of my chest. I was never good at biology but I knew it came from my heart. It was controlling me every time she was mentioned.

"Yes, you're crossing half a continent for "just someone", okay. I believe that." he shook his head and chuckled. "You really won't tell your best friend about your crush?"

I laughed at him in my mind. Oh, if it was only a crush, Max. Then I would've been able to breathe. But I wasn't. Every second, I wanted to make sure she's there, alive, healthy and safe. I remember just checking my computer to see if she's online. Not saying anything, just checking. It made me feel at ease.

"We met a few months back, online. " I started "She saved me. And you know how the princesses fall in love with their knight on a white horse? I guess the same happened."

For a moment we both looked at each other speechless. After a few seconds, I couldn't hold it in any longer and I let a smile appear on face which led to both of us bursting out laughing.

"Did you just compare yourself to a princess?!" Max tried to catch his breath. I could even see a hint of tears from amusement in his eyes. Mine were already filled with them.

"What are you saying? Can't princesses wear football jerseys and never wear pink?" my tummy was already hurting.

After our laughter woke up the whole bus full of students we started whispering. It was so quiet that we could hear each other's heart beats. Not in a romantic way though. He kept quizzing me on what to say and do. He wanted it to be perfect just as much as I did.

"Hey!" he took me by the shoulders "You're gonna be fine. She'll be yours."

For some bizarre reason, his encouraging wink and the eight weeks of planning made me feel confident about my actions...

The bus finally stopped. Dusseldorf. I was so close. For a total of half an hour I was saying goodbye to my classmates and taking my bags. I sat in cafe, planning my day. It was still 9 am after all. And I had the whole week just for her. That is if she wanted to spend it with me. I booked a ticket for 9:45 which meant I had about 30 minutes to shop around the mall. Just like every mall, it had everything I needed. My final decision was to stick with cute and cheesy. I bought a bouquet of red roses, a large teddy bear which I had to drag behind me, a box of chocolates and of course, a book. I wouldn't say she was the biggest fan of reading but I couldn't care less if she had read the book. I just wanted her to see the message. I bought "The Fault in Our Stars" which I was sure she hadn't read even though she promised me she would. Regardless, I bought it in German. By the time I opened the book I realized it was 9:30.

The train was pretty nice and almost empty. Just an old guy who decided to sit right across from me. Great. I knew the journey was about a half hour. At least that's what she had told me. So during that time I took the book and started encrypting my short letter to her. With a red marker, I started highlighting a word on each page. I really hoped she would get it. But after all, she was really smart, of course she would. I had thought a lot about what to write and I got out the note I had prepared and started following it word by word.

"Du warst mein Licht als alles andere dunkel war. Du halfst mir auf als ich in ein schwarzes Loch fiel. Du gabst mir die Hoffnung die ich mein ganzes Leben lang verlor. Aber vorallem gabst du mir jemanden zum Lieben. Dieser jemand bist du. Ich liebe dich."

I did that because...I could write a book, a series about my feelings towards her but this was the highlight.

For the rest of the time I wondered about everything that could possibly go wrong. Wrong address, her being scared of my sudden arrival, me being too pushy, leaving disappointed, her not being there, fainting, not being able to speak. All of those things were racing through my mind when finally, I felt the train stop. I was in Solingen. I had never been so close to her and I had never been more nervous in my life.

Finding a taxi driver wasn't hard. The difficult part was telling them the address while stuttering but one guy seemed to understand me. He even helped me with the luggage and shopping bags. I thanked him with my awful accent and paid him for the ride. Okay, I was in front of the house....What now?

 

The only thing I could think of was a chat. I left my bags on the street. There were two steps to her door. I left the stuffed animal there, facing the door and I sat behind it with my face to the street and gifts in hands. After a few deep breaths I took out my phone and the chat.

"Hey."

"Good morning!"

"How are you bby?"

"Sleepy and bored..."

"Oh, you at home?"

"Yis, why? "

"Just asking.."

　

She was typing something but I already put my phone back in my pocket before ringing the doorbell. I heard footsteps and I started shaking. I stood up. In one hand, I had a book and a large teddy bear. In the other, chocolates and flowers. I turned to face the door with my eyes widened and mouth opened, clueless what to do or say. My mind went blank and just as I was about to run away, the door opened.

I looked up and for a second, just one second I saw her for the first time. I couldn't help but stare into her eyes. Even though they change, they were blue today. And her light reddish hair... As if that wasn't enough, she smiled at me. She.....she smiled at me. I felt paralyzed...no....mesmerized. I heard a "bump" sound and realized I had dropped everything. The chocolates rolled around in front of me and I looked down and then back up again even more scared.

"Hi..I....I was just passing by...Hi..."