My Dear Myungsoo,

I miss you, I wish that you would come home and be with me. Seeing your things all around me is driving me crazy, I have been holding onto sheer memories that seem to slip through my fingers like sand day by day. The only you I see now is the Infinite’s vocal on tv not even around the house anymore.
I miss saying hello to you, I miss rolling over and wrapping my arms around you when I have a bad dream or a stressful day. I miss your warm lips on my skin as you try to comfort me from a hard day at work. I miss wishing you good night. I miss being here to help you relax from your day, and talking to you about everything.
I love you but I am running away from you, I think that it would be better if I just go back to my life and leave you to yours. Since we don’t see each other anyways, due to your schedule. Please understand that this is hard for me but I need to leave you even though I still love you.
Thank you for your warm smile, your open heart, your secure arms, and comforting eyes. Thank you for the love that you freely gave me, and for all of the wonderful memories that I will carry with me forever. I wouldn’t change our time together for anything.

Goodbye,
______________

Leaving this note for him with some sugar cookies, cut out and decorated highlighting some of the top memories that you hold dear to you. Grabbing your things and walking out the door for the last time, tears fell from your eyes as you didn’t want to break up with him but his career had taken things over, the fans got to see him more than you did. You had to watch Infinite perform just to see Myungsoo, sometimes you wished if he really loved you the way that you loved him. The cool air of the morning hit your warm tears as more streamed down your face. Stopping in at this little coffee shop you ordered something warm as you tried to figure out where you were going to go. You couldn’t go to Myungsoo’s parents since you were breaking up with him, your parents were too far away and you didn’t have any money to travel to them anyways.

The buzzing of your phone beside you snapped you out of your thoughts as you looked at the caller ID. It was Crissy one of your closest friends that worked with you. You picked up the phone trying to sound decent from all of the tears that you had.

"Yoboseo?" You said as you drug your straw through your warm beverage focusing on patterns that you were creating in the bubbles on top.

"Hey _____, I was just wondering if you were coming to work today?" Crissy said as you looked at the clock on the wall.

7:24 am

"I don’t think that I am going to make it on time." Fighting the sadness that built up within you.

"Are you ok?" Crissy asked sensing something was wrong on the other line. You shook your head as you couldn’t formulate words. "Come over to my place ok? I will take over your shift as well." Tears fell more from your eyes as you were thankful for a friend like Crissy.

"Thank you" Is all that you could muster up to say.

"I will text you the address and the code, make yourself at home and stay there as long as you need to." Crissy said as you both ended the call. Finishing your beverage you started to walk over to Crissy’s. Punching in the code that she sent you, you entered into her apartment. It was decorated just like her personality, warm, inviting, yet unique and different. Checking out her place made you smile on just how much it reflected her.

—

"Jagi!" Myungsoo cooed as he searched for you. "Jagiya?" He looked on the couch, in the bedroom, in the closet until he stumbled upon your note and the cookies on the counter. After reading the note, he gripped the edge of the granite countertop trying to stabilize himself, he tried to steady his breathing resisting the urge to cry. Looking to his right he saw the cookies that you made for him.

A Heart - Thank you to him for his love

A Microphone - When you sung a song for him as a birthday present

A Sea Shell - That time when you went to the beach for your anniversary and he asked you to be his girlfriend.

An Apron- For all of the times that he took care of you

A Surfboard - When he taught you how to surf and how he taught you how to love

Tears couldn’t help but stain his face as he screamed at the top of his lungs then collapsing to the floor in peril as he couldn’t believe that he lost you.

—

After taking a shower you calmed down and walked to the kitchen to make you something to eat. Crissy met you as she asked what happened. Telling her the whole story she wrapped you in a friendly hug, she spent the rest of the evening with you, keeping you company and trying to make you happy. She made a bed on the couch for you as you thanked her once more for her kind hospitality. She bid you a goodnight and went to sleep as well.

—

The long cast shadows and the dim light made his apartment feel lonely and dreary without you . After he cried all of his tears he picked himself up from the ground and walked out the door. Shoving his hands into his pockets he walked down the deserted streets, thunder rolled above him as the clouds moved in tinting the dark sky. Walking for hours, through the pounding rain he cleared his head, walking everywhere he could think of. Wondering where you are, he tried to call your phone but yours seemed to be out of battery. He started to pick up his pace and run all over the city in a search for you. Going through all of the possible places that you could be, he went to every single one of them. Waking up your friends and coworkers asking them if they had seen you. All of them declined and didn’t know where you were. Making Myungsoo more anxious to find you.

"Do you know where ______ is?" He asked one of your girl friends that you went out with a couple months ago.

"She might be at Crissy’s, those two are really good friends now" Myungsoo thanked her and bowed as he quickly got the address and ran to her place.

—

Waking up to the sound of the knock on the door, you sat up as Crissy moved to the door and opened it with caution.

"Hello, I was just wondering if you had seen ______?" You could tell it was Myungsoo by his voice as Crissy looked at you on the other side of the door as you nodded your head.

"Yes I have, will you please come in?" Crissy said as she let Myungsoo in.

His rain soaked clothes, his disheveled hair, his dirt splotched white V neck shirt clutched to his tones body underneath. You stood up from the couch in your black tank top and sky blue sleeping shorts as you just wanted to know what happened. Myungsoo stood there in the entrance.

"Sorry to bother you, Crissy" Myungsoo said in his tired tone as she shook her head reading your body language as well as his.

"I will let you two talk" Crissy said as she walked into the kitchen as Myungsoo’s head snapped up not realizing that you were here with her. His eyes widened as he saw you and he started to tear up just at your sight, you folded your arms trying not to become attached to him again.

”______?” Myungsoo asked quietly as you nodded your head. “Do you really want to break up with me?” His tone was heart shattering as you looked in his eyes and shook your head. “Why did you write that note then?” You walked closer to him inspecting him at the scrapes and cuts that he now had.

"You never spend any time with me, you haven’t for the past month, I know it is your job and you have responsibilities and expectations but the only time that I got to see you was on tv." You choked down your tears.

"Why didn’t you call me?" Myungsoo walked towards you studying you like he would for a test but this was his final exam.

"I thought that you didn’t love me anymore" You trailed off closing your eyes hoping that he wouldn’t yell at you. Instead two cold arms wrapped around you and pulled you in close to him, your arms wrapped around him subconsciously.

"I would never stop loving you, I never stopped thinking about you, never stopped missing you since I was away. I am sorry that I was gone for so long, that I didn’t try harder." You felt his body shake as you rested your head on his chest listening to his light breathing and his rapid heart. Gently shushing him you hugged him tighter nuzzling your face into his chest. His head snuggled into the gape of your neck as you felt his tears against your skin. Moving your hand up you gently caressed his head trying to calm him down.

"It hurt me that you left." Myungsoo choked out through his tears as his grip tightened on you more.

"It hurt me to leave" You said kissing his neck gently.

"I will take you on all of my trips now. I will call you every couple hours, I will do anything to get you back and I will try not to hurt you." Myungsoo clung to you tighter. "I don’t want you to leave." Holding onto him you began to try.

"I won’t, I won’t. I promised…" You got cut off by him

"On the beach overlooking the sunset, right after you said that you would be my girlfriend." He pulled away from you looking into his eye as your tears began to fall.

"You remembered?" You asked as you played with his shirt looking away from his eyes.

"I remember everything that has to do with you."