Sehun spent the rest of the evening with his family, eating, watching TV, having shallow conversations, but he went up early anyway. As he disappeared up the stairs, Lan surprised her older son by hugging him tightly

“Thank you so much, son. You’re an angel!”

“Huh… Why?”

“I’m Sehun's mother and I just stand here not knowing what to say to make him feel better, but you… you can really make him smile, and I love you for that.”

Luhan shrugged, feeling a bit embarrassed. “I did nothing.”

Even Zhoumi gave him a tender smile. “You’re a great kid, Luhan,” he said.

The boy rolled his eyes. “Wow, what’s up with you guys today? Too much affection! I think I’m going up too, before I melt here.”

He wasn’t able to run away from his mom’s slushy kiss before heading upstairs, though.

When Luhan entered the room, Sehun seemed to be deeply asleep in the inflatable bed. Luhan knew he was faking it when, some minutes after he turn off the lights, the muffled sobs reached his hears. Luhan remained very still, also pretending to be asleep, as maybe his brother would feel more comfortable if left alone with his sorrow. However, the pain embedded in the sounds from the bed next to his started to ade his soul so that he could no longer lie there, just listening.

“Sehun…” Luhan whispered, reaching for his brother’s shoulder. His sobs ceased out of surprise, only to resume again, sounding even more painful. Sehun squeezed his brother's hand, holding his forearm against himself like it was a teddy bear. Luhan decided to remain this way if it made Sehun feel better, but soon he became uncomfortable, with his arm hanging like that. So, without giving it too much thought, he slid from under his sheets and laid down next to Sehun. He held Luhan like a drowning boy would hold a float, soaking the front of his shirt with tears and drivel. Luhan held him back, his hair for a long time, not saying a word because none would ease that pain.

Eventually, the sobbing weakened and ceased, but they remained holding each other. After drying his eyes with the back of his hand, Sehun spoke to Luhan's chest.

“Do you believe in god?” he asked, with a husky voice.

“No” Luhan answered, softly but without hesitation.

“So… you don’t believe dad might not be gone forever, that he might have… gone to a better place?”

This time, Luhan bit his lower lip before answering. He liked being able to comfort people but, on the other hand, he wasn’t such a big fan of white lies.

“To be honest, no, I don’t. Do you?”

“I didn’t use to. Now, I would like to be able to believe in something like that,” Sehun confessed. Then, he surprised his brother with a laugh. “On second thought, maybe it’s better this way. I’m not sure if the old man would make it to the upper floor.”

“What?!” Luhan said, a little shocked.

Sehun snorted.“Don’t take me wrong, he was mostly a pretty good guy but… he had some gambling issues, some not very legal stuff, at that. I suppose it counts as a sin.”

Luhan's eyes widened as this information dawned on him. So the source of his father’s mysterious economical struggle, the one that had prevented him from visiting Luhan all that time... was gambling? Could it be that his mother knew all along, never telling him about it? Or was she also oblivious from the whole situation?

“I’ve just ruined any good thought you might have about dad, didn’t I?” Sehun asked as his brother’s silence stretched between them.

“Huh? No, not at all,” Luhan reassured. “If there is a god…”

“Which you don’t believe there is,” Sehun added with a smile in his voice.

“Which I don’t believe there is,” Luhan conceded, giving him the smile back. “I’m sure he would take dad to the upper floor anyway.”

Silence followed -- not an awkward silence, more like a placid one.

When Luhan made a move to get up, Sehun's hand closed around his wrist.

“Can you… ummm…” he hesitated. “Can you please stay here?”

“Sure,” Luhan answered immediately. “I was not leaving, I just have to change my shirt.” He said, turning the lights on. He saw Sehun's face, still reddened and swollen, but with dry eyes, and smiled at him.

“I’m sorry,” Sehun said, embarrassed. “And thank you. I’m not going to cry like a baby again,” he promised, mostly to himself, while Luhan changed into a dry pajamas shirt.

“It’s ok, cry all you want.” Luhan grinned, gesturing with his thumb to the closet. “I have plenty of shirts.”

~