Waiting in front of a skin-care center building, Eric is half standing and half sitting on the side of his green Harley Davidson, relentlessly flipping his phone. Beads of sweat roll down his forehead despite the chilly late-autumn wind blowing. The tall, good-looking guy is well wrapped in warm black leather jacket and a pair of matching gloves and boots. Still, both of his hands and feet are cold as ice. He checks his phone screen to look at the time. The agonizing eternity he feels turns out to be only ten minutes. He should be out any minute now, he thinks to himself. Several seconds later, a familiar slender figure approaches, and Eric’s heart skips a beat before starting to race. The beads of sweat are getting up-sized and his cold hands and feet are now frozen.

Shinhwa’s main vocal Shin Hyesung gracefully comes out of the building clad in a scarlet long coat, a pair of gray jeans and dark-brown boots. The breeze gently caresses his bare black locks and broken-white shawl. Keeping his clammy hands in the coat pockets, he walks slowly towards the dashing gentleman waiting for him by his motorbike, hoping that his sprinting heart would adjust to his pace. Alas, it does not seem to be working. In fact, the closer he gets, the faster it beats. Until it stops for a second as he arrived at his destination.

An awkward silence envelops the already cold atmosphere. Strangely enough, both Eric and Hyesung gradually feel warm and fuzzy all over. It could be because of all the blood pumped by their hard-beating hearts, or simply, the love they have for each other. Both of them start calling each other’s names at the same time, and stop abruptly before beginning to laugh. 

“You go first,” Eric initiates.

“No, you go first,” says Hyesung.

“I like your new hair,” Eric remarks.

“Thanks,” Hyesung replies.

“You’re blushing,” Eric points at Hyesung’s pink cheeks. 

Eric’s gorgeous smile melts Hyesung’s heart and turns the pink into red, but he manages to retort, “No, I came here for a facial, remember?!”

Hyesung’s pout lights fireworks in Eric’s heart and a bright smile on his face while he chuckles and says, “Arasseo, arasseo.”

Hyesung tries to keep his lips from curling up into a crescent smile by recalling the huge fight they had three days ago. Well, actually it was more of a really big explosion of feelings on his part.

It was a schedule-free Sunday. The beautiful couple were enjoying a lazy afternoon together by lounging on a couch and watching their favorite DVDs in Hyesung’s living room when Eric’s phone rang. It was his mother. 

“Ne, Eomma.. Fine.. How about you and Appa? … That’s great. And my sisters and little darlings? … Wonderful! … Yeah, he’s here. … Nothing, just watching some movies. … Yep?… Uhmm.. I’m not sure. Gotta check first with Jonghyun. … Yeah, of course. If there are no schedules, we’d definitely come. …” 

Eric suddenly got up and went out to the balcony, closing the door behind him, with Hyesung’s eyes closely following behind. Must be something he doesn’t want me to hear, Hyesung thought.

A few minutes later, Eric came back in and resumed sitting next to his significant other like nothing happened. Grabbing some popcorn, he casually asked, “So, what have I missed?” Seemingly referring to the movie they were watching while obviously trying to ignore the elephant in the room.

The slightly uneasy Hyesung calmly replied, “Oh, nothing much. Just the part where the guy got a call from his mom and didn’t even let his friend of seventeen years and partner of ten years sends his warm familial regards like he always does for the last fifteen years or so.” He stopped a while to allow time for the response, which never came, then continued, ”Wanna tell me what’s going on?” 

Eric cleared his throat before replying, “Mom wants us to come for Thanksgiving…” 

His sentence hung in the air, so Hyesung continued it for him, “Aaaand..?” 

“And she asked when we’re gonna…*clears throat* Get married.” Eric was clearly struggling to finish that sentence.

“And what did you say?” Hyesung asked while putting great efforts to stay composed.

“I said we’d definitely come if we’re free.” Eric replied nonchalantly. 

“Eric!” Hyesung snapped. “How many times have we had this conversation? Three days from now, it’s gonna be our 10th anniversary. TEN ing years! How many times have I asked you to marry me? Three damn times! And how many times have our friends and family asked us? Countless! You’ve always said WE weren’t ready since I first asked five years ago. And I thought, maybe you’re right. Well, news flash… It was and has always been just YOU! You’re the one who never really let me into your life, Eric. You spend more time in my place than in your own, but refused to move in when I offered. You’ve never even taken me for a ride on that goddamn motorbike since you got it last year!” 

Hyesung was out of breath with tears running down his burning face. Eric was shocked and speechless. He has never seen Hyesung that emotional before and thus really didn’t know what to say. 

“What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?’ Hyesung continued, noticing the flabbergasted expression on his man’s face. “Look, Eric. You’re a 34 year-old man. It’s time for you to figure out what you want. I want you. But if you don’t want me, then so be it. You can marry and live with your precious Mr. Harley Davidson for all I care!” 

Hyesung ran to his bedroom and slammed the door shut. Eric instinctively approached the door with his hand raised to knock on it. But as he heard Hyesung’s sobbing, he realized there was nothing he could do at the moment.

Hyesung heard when Eric left, and continued crying himself to sleep. When he woke up, it was already dark. He the bedside lamp and checked on his phone. There were two missed calls from his manager, Taehak. None from Eric. He put his phone aside and nearly jumped when it suddenly rang. He quickly grabbed it to see if it was Eric. Disappointingly, it was just Taehak. 

“*clears throat* Yes? … No, I’m not feeling very well. … No, It’s okay. I already took some medicine. … Uhmm.. Can we move that to next week instead? I think I wanna take the week off, if possible. … Yes, okay. Thanks. Oh, Teahakkie? … Can you book me a facial appointment at the skin-care center, please? … Yes, just text me the schedule. Thanks. … Ok, bye.” 

Hyesung tried getting up and had to move slowly because his head hurt. He went to the bathroom, looked at his face in the mirror and was startled by the sight. His eyes were beyond puffy. They were really swollen and ugly. He went to the kitchen and get his eye-cooling gel from the fridge, along with some painkiller for his headache, and water. After getting what he needed, he made his way back to his bedroom. As he was passing the living room, he noticed that the TV and DVD player were still on.

“Aisshh.. That pabo.. Didn’t even turn the TV off,” he muttered. He turned off the TV and DVD player, then continued on his way to the bedroom. He took the painkiller, put on his eye-cooling gel, and tucked himself in. As he closes his eyes back to sleep, tears slowly rolled down his cheeks again.

And it hurts… And it hurts so bad… Forever in my heart there’s only you, why don’t you know? Why don’t you know? -Hurts

Back in his own apartment, Eric slumped into his favorite armchair. Gomdori jumped onto his lap and his daddy’s weary face. He got hold of the brown puppy’s head and look straight into its marble eyes, saying, “Gomdori yah~ Your pabo appa here has been a true special stupid. I’ve truly hurt and taken for granted the only person I’ve ever loved and who loves me back at least twice as much as I love him. What do I do now, huh? Gomdori yah~ eottokhaji?” 

With Gomdori lying quietly on his lap, Eric rested his head back on the chair and closed his eyes. Of course he wants Hyesung. He has always wanted him since the first time he laid eyes on him seventeen years ago. His soft, feminine features and angelic voice, along with his shy, naggy and sulky nature, are all in contrast with his manly behavior and style.

And his pouts.. They’re the cutest in the world! And just like that, thinking of Hyesung’s super cute pouts made Eric smile without him even realizing it. So why did he chicken out? He is actually afraid. He likes things the way they are now. And he is afraid that marriage would change that. Now he realized that with or without marriage, things will change as time goes by. And time… Time cannot wait for you, even if it wants to.

Now after all this time, I finally know that you are so precious… Beautiful day, always by your side… It’s a new me, It’s a new me now… I will make you happy and only care for you… I will show you how I changed -New Me

Hyesung had woken up late this morning, still feeling like . He was missing Eric so bad, but could not bring himself to initiate a contact. He checked his phone and found out it had ran out of battery. He plugged the charger in and decided to turn on the phone a little later. A hot bubble bath would be nice, he thought. He really felt like pampering himself, since today would be the first anniversary he celebrates without Eric.

Then he laughed bitterly, wondering if there is even an anniversary to celebrate after you break up. Still, the more reason for pampering. Hence, he grabbed a quick breakfast of chocolate and sesame sandwich, then soaked himself while sipping wine and listening to soothing classical music.

All of a sudden, he remembered that he had not received the schedule for his facial appointment from Taehak. So, he got out of the tub, put a towel around himself, and went to fetch his phone. He only realized that it was almost 12 pm after seeing the clock on his phone screen. Then a whole bunch of text message notifications popped up. Most are congratulatory messages on his anniversary with Eric from friends and family. One is from Taehak and another is from… Eric!

Very early this morning, after mustering enough courage for two days, Eric finally texted Hyesung and asked what he would be doing today. He then texted his managers, Jonghyun and Bogeun, to cancel all his schedules and appointments for the day.

Today is their anniversary day, and messages congratulating him and Hyesung on their 10th anniversary started pouring in from friends and family. Some still wished that they get married. Others seemed to have given up on the idea. Eric just sniggered as he read, replied some, and deleted the messages one by one.

Then he realized that it was already almost noon, but Hyesung still had not replied. Eric could have asked Taehak, but the Shinhwa Company CEO wanted to keep this personal matter just between Hyesung and himself. Yet, he could not bear to wait any longer, so he rushed to his most beloved neighbor’s apartment. He was already at Hyesung’s door step, getting ready to push the bell when his phone chirped. 

Hyesung: “ I have a facial appointment at the skin-care center at 4.30 p.m.”

Eric: “And what time will you finish, then? Around 5.30?”

Hyesung: “Yes.”

Eric: “Mind if I pick you up? I’ve finally figured out what I want.”

Hyesung: “Sure.”

Eric: “Great! See you then!”

And in a flash, Hyesung’s last reply has gotten the leader of a supposedly respectable Kpop legendary idol group literally jump for joy… All the way back to his own apartment.

Right back… Right back… Baby [boy] let me get you right back… get you right back… Right back… Baby [boy] let me get you right back -Right Back

So he finally figured out what he wants, Hyesung thought. Buds of hope began to bloom in his heart. But what if he really doesn’t want me? Now came along the anxieties, nipping all the buds off.

“AAAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!” Hyesung groaned, venting out his frustrations. He threw his body back onto the bed he was sitting on. His mind was busy thinking what he was going to do next. The skin-care center is about 30 minutes drive from his place. That means he should leave by 4 pm. But it’s only 12… How should I spend the next four hours? He asked himself, almost freaking out.

“Ah, matda!” He suddenly had an idea. “Eo, Taehak ssi? Can you book me an appointment at our salon for 2 p.m. today, please? … Yep… And pick me up in about an hour? … I wanna get my hair done. … For something. Look, it doesn’t matter. Just pick me up in an hour, okay? … Okay. Thanks.” He quickly got up and half running into his walk-in closet. He wanted to look his best for Eric.

My love, be my love oh be my love… You are dazzling like the sun… I just wanna be your love forever my love… You, who I fell for at first sight -Be My Love

The skin-care center building is in a quite secluded area. It is very exclusive too, and people come only by appointments. Usually less people come on a weekday like today, so Eric and Hyesung are alone at the parking lot. 

“By the way, happy anniversary!” Curving both arms and hands on his head, the handsome dork presents a big heart sign to the love of his life, at which Hyesung can’t help but smile.

Then suddenly, Eric wears a very serious expression on that handsome face of his and stands up, which makes Hyesung’s heart slowly resumes sprinting.

Eric puts his hand into his right jacket pocket and produces a silver ring. He then proceeds by taking Hyesung’s left hand and, as he puts the ring on the slim ring finger, he says, “I am sorry for the things I should have said but didn’t. I am sorry for the things I should have done, but didn’t. And I am sorry for taking you for granted for the past 10 years. I love you, I want you, and I hope you still want me too.”

He wipes Hyesung’s tears, pulls him into his arms, and lets his soon-to-be partner for life sobs for several seconds. Next, he takes out a new, orange-ish helmet he had custom-made for Hyesung since months ago as their anniversary gift. It is specially paint-brushed to look like a bird’s head from the front and side, and a crab from the back, which are the two animals most associated with Hyesung.

Biting his lower lip, Hyesung witnesses Eric slowly gets down on one knee right before him. Handing him the helmet, Eric looks straight into Hyesung’s eyes and asks with utmost sincerity in his eyes and voice, “My dearest Shin Hyesung ssi.. Some rides will be smooth, some will be bumpy, but will you jump on my motorcycle with me?”

Hyesung looks at the pretty helmet on Eric’s hand for a second before taking it and say, “Yes, Mr. Eric Mun. I will.” 

Both brightly smile, embrace and kiss passionately. Then, they wear their helmets and ride together into the sunset.

I held your hand and put a ring on your finger… Will you please remember this day? I gave you my heart (You know know)… I gave you my soul (You know know)… Because you rise up from deep within my heart… I gave you my heart (You know know)… I gave you my soul (You know know)… My dazzling love, my dear… You’re always on my mind -I Gave You

-The End-