Terrible Things

{ must listen while reading : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnPKBwO4-P8 }

By the time I was your age, I’d give anything to fall in love truly
was all I could think,
that’s when I met your mother,
the girl of my dreams,
the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
 

He tapped his pencil rapidly, avoiding eye contact with everyone else in the tiny classroom. The room consisted of about twenty students or so. The eighteen-year-old boy sighed, looking around the room. He already knew the class would be a waste of time for him. The teacher went on to rant on about something that no one even cared about.

The boy stared outside the window that was next to him, sighing slowly. This was how he would end his senior year. The door then suddenly opened, and a student came walking in. He looked over, his eyes widening. The girl that had walked in had beautiful slick black hair.

She raised her head up, showcasing beautiful brown eyes. Her black hair was straight and shiny. When she suddenly smiled, she looked like a goddess. The boy then couldn’t take his eyes off of her. She went ahead and introduced herself. “Hello,” her voice was beautiful. “My name is Seo Joohyun. I hope we will all get along.”

She suddenly looked at him, and his heart started to beat rapidly. He dropped the pencil in his hand, his mouth was open. It took a while for Changmin to go back to himself, but he found himself smiling back at her.

---

The next day, she was assigned to the desk next to him. Her hair was wavy this time, her bangs hid her forehead. Although they all wore uniforms, she somehow stood out the most to the boy. The boy bowed his head a little, hoping she couldn’t see his smile. “I didn’t get to introduce myself,” he started out. “My name is Shim Changmin. I hope we’ll get along.”

Joohyun looked at him and chuckled. She held out a hand and smiled gently at him. “Nice to meet you, Changmin. I just know that we’ll get along,” she said, taking his hand and shaking it.

Changmin looked down, not daring to look her in the eye. He was smiling now, it was hidden of course. “Yeah,” he said, looking up at the goddess. “I think we will.”

She laughed; a soft one. “Since we’ll get along, why don’t you help me with this problem?”

Changmin stared at her and laughed alongside with her. “What do I get in return?”

Joohyun thought for a second and snapped her fingers. “I’ll treat you to pork noodles.”

Changmin smiled a wide smile, nodding his head. “Alright. I’ll take that offer.”
 

She said, “Boy, can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I can’t help but notice you staring at me,
I know I shouldn’t say this, but I really believe,
I can tell by your eyes that you’re in love with me.”
 

Six months passed then, a boy and a girl are holding hands walking around the campus. The boy kept sneaking glances at the girl whose hand he was holding. He was smiling genuinely, silently tightening his grip on her hand. She looked down, and then looked up to the face of the boy she loved.

Although they had only been together for a couple of months, their love was greater than anyone else. Anyone who had seen them envied them. She smiled at the boy, squeezing his hand. “Changmin, can I ask you a question?”

Changmin stared at the girl and he nodded. “You can tell me anything, Joohyun. You know that.”

Joohyun chuckled. She stared into his beautiful, dark brown eyes to the hand that was holding her. She looked at the face of the person she wanted to spend her entire life with. “I don’t think I’m in the place to ask such a question, but are you in love with me?”

Changmin looked shocked for a second – only for a second. He then broke into a soft smile, bringing the hand that he held and gently kissed it. “What makes you think that?”

Joohyun caressed his face slowly, admiring it. She then stared into the eyes that she loved so much. “I can tell by your eyes that you love me. Is that right?”

“You were always so smart,” the boy patted her head and sighed. He was happy – truly happy. He cupped her face and brought it closer to his. “Yes. I love you. Are you satisfied?”

Joohyun smiled widely, showing her perfect white teeth. She giggled, embracing him and planting a kiss on his cheek. She brought her lips to his ear and whispered, “I am. I love you too.”
 

Now most of the time, we’d have too much to drink,
and we’d laugh at the stars and we’d share everything.
Too young to notice and too dumb to care,
love was a story that couldn’t compare.
 

Beer bottles filled the sink; the place was quite a mess. There were wrappers, bottles, and plastic bags everywhere in the tiny apartment. Yet no one was inside, instead, there were two young adults outside. Lying down, just staring up at the night sky.

The man took a hold of the woman’s hand, wanting to hold it forever. Her warmth would be the only thing he ever wanted now. He sighed slowly, pointing up at the night sky.

The sky was filled with glittering stars. Looking from right to left, it was bright and beautiful. The man asked in a curious tone. “Do you know how many stars there are in this sky?”

The woman tilted her head, looking up at the sky and she smiled. “I don’t know. How about we count them, Changmin?”

Changmin laughed and smiled, taking a quick look at his perfect partner. “We’ll count them until we’re old. We’ll find out how many stars fill this night sky. Are you up for it, Joohyun?”

Joohyun sighed and looked up, admiring the night sky that was filled with stars. Oh, how perfect that moment was right now. It would be amazing if a shooting star suddenly came. “Yes, I’m up for it.” She said in a tired tone, slowly turning her body to face Changmin. “Hey, Changmin?”

Changmin then faced Joohyun, she looked distracted. Her face was red and so he chuckled. “Joohyun, are you drunk? You were never the one who could hold her alcohol, anyway.”

Joohyun frowned, lightly hitting Changmin in the chest. She moved closer to him and sighed. “You’re warm. I want to stay like this forever. So promise me that you won’t leave me. Promise me that.”

He stared at her, putting his arms around her waist, his head on top of hers. He sighed happily, holding her tight. “You know, I will never leave you. So, I promise I’ll always be by your side. If the day comes, I’ll marry you. No one except for me will be able to marry you.”

She smiled, her face buried in his chest. “Will you really?”

“Of course,” Changmin said quietly. “I love you, after all.”

He heard her sounding asleep now, and he smiled. As he was about to stand up to get some blankets, a hand took hold of his arm. Joohyun stared at him, her lips forming a small frown. “You said you wouldn’t leave me.”

Changmin smiled. “You might catch a cold if you don’t use a blanket, you know.”

“I have you,” Joohyun said, looking down. “You’re warm and your body is like an oven. So, stay here.”

“An oven?! Well, I must be hot then,” Changmin laughed, lying down beside her again. He wrapped his arms around her and closed his eyes. “Yeah. I know for sure I love you.”

Joohyun’s eyes were closed, her heart was beating fast. Though, as she heard Changmin’s slow heartbeats, it calmed her down a bit. And as she lied there with the person she loved, she felt good to be alive. Nothing could ever beat this moment that she was having.
 

I said, “Girl, can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I made you a present with paper and string,
open with care now, I’m asking you please,
you know that I love you,
will you marry me?”
 

“Ah, Changmin!” A woman was being dragged as she caught up with the man who was dragging her. “Please, calm down!”

Changmin gave a sigh, his fist shaking as he faced her. “Joohyun,” he said, his tone sharp. Upon hearing that tone, she flinched. Changmin immediately changed his tone and looked down. “I’m sorry. I acted childish. That man was all over you, and I couldn’t take it.”

Joohyun looked down and shook her head. “I’m at fault. I’m sorry for letting him be that way,” she said.

The box in Changmin’s pocket felt heavy as though it weighed over a thousand pounds. He had walked back and forth inside Joohyun’s office, trying to make his decision. Alas, he opened the door only to see a man was looking at her, lust covered his face.

And although she asked him to leave, he tried to touch her. Changmin then lost it at then, going as far as to almost punching the man. Joohyun then broke it up, having security take the man away. It was then Changmin took her hand and led her to a park near the building.

There, Changmin and Joohyun stood in front of a small fountain. It was a small park with two swings and one slide. Despite the situation, it was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and it just seemed perfect. “No. Please don’t blame yourself,” Changmin said, slowly gulping. “Please, Joohyun. I’ll make it up to you.”

Joohyun looked at him and gave a nervous smile. “What? Some pork noodles?”

Changmin smiled. “I’ll get you some. But I have something else I have to give you,” he said, pulling out the box that he kept inside his pocket. His hand was shaking as he took her hand, setting the box into her small hand. “Um, open it.”

Joohyun examined the box. It was a small box that was wrapped in printer paper with a red string that tied around it. Nevertheless, she tugged on the string and slowly took the paper off the box. The box was small and plain black. Joohyun’s heart was racing, her hands now shook. She then proceeded to open the box, gasping.

Tears suddenly came to her eyes as she looked at Changmin. He, with confidence this time, kneeled down in front of her, taking hold on hands. He slowly took the box away from her, taking the ring off. The ring was silver, showcasing a small diamond right in the middle. He raised the ring in his left hand, and he held her hand in his right hand.

“Seo Joohyun. I love you,” he said, slightly nervous but he shook it off. “You know that, don’t you? I don’t think I can ever imagine being with anyone else. You complete me, you make me happy. You’re perfect; I can’t imagine life with you. I need you to be with me. I love you too much. Seo Joohyun, will you marry me?”

Changmin slowly slid the ring onto her right hand, and as he thought, it fit perfectly as if it was meant to be hers in the very beginning. Joohyun stared at the ring, crying now. She nodded, embracing Changmin tightly. Her tears dropped onto his shoulder and as she cried onto him, she was happy.

He held her, never wanting to let go off her. He felt as though something heavy was finally off his shoulders. He sighed happily and muttered, “I told you I would marry you one day.”

Joohyun laughed as she cried, nodding quickly. “Yes, you did. Thank you for keeping that promise. Thank you.”
 

Now, son, I’m only telling you this because
life can do terrible things.
You’ll learn one day,
and I hope and I pray that God shows you differently.
 

The forty-year old man sighed as he slowly walked down the staircase. He noticed his younger version lying down on the couch, texting rapidly. He sighed once again and sat in front of the boy. “Who are you texting?”

The boy didn’t take his eyes off the tiny screen. “Talking to this one girl, she’s pretty cute. I might ask her out or something.”

The father tightened his fist. “Son, I need to tell you something.”

“I know about the whole safe thing, Dad,” the boy sighed, adjusting the pillow that was beneath his head. “Already had the talk about a month ago, remember?”

The father shook his head and looked at his son. “It’s something else. I need to tell it to you before I forget.”

“Old age getting to you?” The boy chuckled, setting his phone down and looking at his father. “Okay, I’m listening. What is it that you need to tell me?”

“I need to tell you about your mother.”

Silence came upon the living room as the boy slowly sat up on the couch. He looked at his father with a serious expression, his hands gripping a small pillow. His father looked away from him, a sad expression on his face. “Mom?”

The man nodded and slowly looked at his son. “Would you like to know about her?”

The son looked away, afraid that he might break down in front of his father. He knew nothing about his mother other than the fact that she was gone when he was young – about a year old or something. His father never brought her up, and so he never knew about her.

The son bit his lip and looked at his father, straight into his eyes. His father flinched – when his son looked at him into his eyes, it was as if Joohyun was doing it. He looked so much like her, and that just made it harder for him.

“Please,” his son pleaded his voice half-way breaking. “Please, tell me more about her. I want to know about her, you have no idea. So, please, Dad. I want to know more about Mom.”

His father put his face into his hands then slowly looked up and sighed. “I’ll tell you everything about her. And what happened. You seem to have grown into the man she wanted. It’s just too bad that life can do terrible things.”
 

She said, “Boy, can I tell you a terrible thing?
It seems that I’m sick and I’ve only got weeks.
Please don’t be sad now, I really believe,
you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”
 

A year passed then, and the young couple could never have been happier. The wife left on a Monday morning, to do some “errands” and left her husband with her newborn boy. As she drove, her heart felt heavy. She gripped into the wheel as she drove to the road.

The husband was at home; currently unemployed, but that didn’t really bother him. He held his newborn son in his arms as he smiled widely. “You’re going to make me happy, aren’t you, little man?”

The baby giggled and raised its arms, making his father laugh. Everything was perfect, according to the husband.

To the wife, she stood in the clinic that she was regularly visiting now. She walked in and faced the reception. “Seo Joohyun.” The receptionist nodded, and led her into the waiting room.

Joohyun then sighed, picking up a magazine to pass time. As she flipped through the pages, she noticed pictures of happy families with bright smiles. She bit her lip, holding the tears back. She refused to cry – for her, for her child, and for Changmin.

She was a brave woman, this Joohyun. As she flipped through a few more pages, the door opened to reveal a doctor that she came to know well. “Seo Joohyun.” She stood up and walked toward her doctor. He bowed his head, upon seeing her. “Nice to see you again. Let’s do your checkup now, shall we?”

---

As she drove, her whole body shook. She had to stop a couple of times to breathe deeply and drive once again. Her phone displayed a whole list of missed calls from Changmin. Him worrying made her a bit better. She allowed herself to cry once more before driving properly into her small home.

She parked her car into the driveway slowly. She sat there for a couple of minutes before taking up the courage to come in. As she came in the living room, she felt two arms embrace her. Changmin stood there, smiling up at her. “Whew! I was starting to worry.”

Joohyun chuckled, taking her coat off. “Where’s the baby?”

“Oh, him? I put him to sleep,” Changmin said, letting her go and giving her a thumbs up. “See? I’m capable of putting kids to sleep. That just proves that some kids can like me!”

Joohyun laughed. Every child that had met Changmin either cried or ran away from him. They never really ended up liking him in the end.

Joohyun looked at Changmin. He seemed so happy, and yet she felt the need to tell him. She would have to be the one who will ruin his happy moment. “Changmin, I have something terrible to tell you.”

Changmin stared at her, a worried expression on his face as he took her hands and held it tight. She smiled weakly at him. “Joohyun, what is it? Tell me.”

“It seems I’m sick, and I’ve only got weeks,” Joohyun said and gave a weak smile. “I don’t think I’ll be able to count those stars with you.”

He said nothing, and instead, kissed her as tears ran down his face.
 

Slow, so slow
I fell to the ground, on my knees
 

He stood there, wanting to punch something. Possibly the next person he was going to see. The doctor looked down as he said, “I’m sorry. Your wife passed away because of lung failure.”

That was when he fell down on his knees, the tears falling from his eyes. He kept his mouth shut, because he knew, that if he opened it, he would be screaming endlessly. He just stood there; he knew his world had been crushed.

Nothing felt sense to him anymore, as he slowly got up and exited the hospital. Once outside, he screamed and yelled and punched everything that was in sight. Nothing mattered to him at that moment except destroying everything that was in his way.

He cried, punching a tree that was in front of him.

She was gone. He would never hear her laugh anymore, never have playful fights with her, cook with her, play with their son together, they never even took a trip together. And now, that would never happen because she was gone.

He didn’t want to accept that fact. He just stood on his knees, yelling her name over and over again.

She, however, would never respond. She was simply gone.
 

So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose
If given the choice, then, I'm begging you choose
To walk away, walk away, don't let her get you.
I can't bear to see the same happen to you.
 

The son stared at his father, who was now in tears. Never have he seen his father like this before, and before he knew it, he was crying as well. His hands shook as he walked towards his old man, embracing him. “I-I’m so sorry, Dad.”

His father, in return, hugged him tightly, the tears coming even more. “I know, son.”

The son cried even harder then and held his father. “M-Mom loved you so much. I love you. And I think that she is here, watching over us! I-I. . . “He couldn’t finish as his tears covered his whole face.

The father looked up at the ceiling, sniffing. There were no such thing as ‘man-pride’ as of now. “Please, don’t let this happen to you. I don’t want to have to see the same thing happen to you.”
 

Now, son, I’m only telling you this because
life can do terrible things.
 

The now fifty-year old man got out of his car, a handful of red roses on his hand. He then walked over to his desired gravestone and smiled. “Hey, Joohyun. Guess what? Our little man grew up, has three children of his own. I bet you’re looking after them, aren’t you?”

The man chuckled, setting the red roses on top of her grave.

Seo Joohyun

Daughter, Mother, Wife

Loved and Missed

Changmin sighed, kneeling down in front of the grave. Never did he re-marry nor did he look at other women. Only one could ever make him happy and he knew that she had already fulfilled that.

He smiled, touching her gravestone gently. “Seo Joohyun, I love you. You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me even when life can do terrible things.”

 

a/n; hi, everyone.
thank you so much for reading!