I’m scared of falling

In both ways too

I’m scared of going splat

And I’m scared of you

These were the thoughts of Zelo, the 11^th grader, going to the Ceramics room. He sees his best friend and waves a hello. “What the was that,” he questions himself. It seems like these thoughts were haunting him day and night, the source of them still a mystery. He refuses to acknowledge any part of it however and still partake on life with ease. He sees said guy friend wave back lazily before continuing to scrutinize his artwork.

“Hey Zelo, do you think this arm is weird looking?”

“Nah, I think your face is weirder so it should have balanced out,” Zelo replied without looking up at the guy, eyes glued on choosing the color of paints for his art piece.

“Ha ha, I meant the piece smartass. Just do something with it, it looks sad,” Jongup said exasperatedly at his ceramic piece.

“No,” Zelo said as he went over to Jongup’s side and over towered him, making him more agitated than he already was.

The guy beside me is indeed Jongup, the lazy motherer who doesn’t give a about school but still gets damn A’s in all his tests and quizzes. Yes, the supposed troublemaker of the popular group is my best friend.

 I stared at him as I waited for his usual “ you” face and long and behold, there it was. He asked me to help him (again) and I sighed in defeat and shoved him so I could start working on his piece.

Why is he my best friend? I don’t even know. He came to my table one day and suddenly asked me for favors with his art pieces because they were “failing” and “not good yet.” I asked him what the delay was and he said it’s because he was too busy “not doing it instead.”

Lazy .

But I took the offer up anyway and since then we started talking more. No we’re not dating, no, he did not fall for me, and no, I did not fall for him. We’re just good buddies who like to be in the other’s presence every once in a while. Does it make us seem like a couple? Yes, yes it does. Thanks to both of our lovely friends, we are constantly bombarded with reminders of getting together and marrying the other sometime in the future.

Maybe we should, but I know there’s no point to it.

“Hey, you’re ruining my piece! Zelo, what the are you doing?” He wailed in my ear as I misplaced his arm a bit too much to the left. He then placed his hand at the bottom of my back as he leaned in, unaware of the domino effect it’s causing to my body. He placed his hand just above my shorts and that feeling was back; that weird tingly feeling in the bottom of my stomach was back because of him.

I moved away cautiously, worried that he could feel my shoulders tensed from his touch, and he looked at me weirdly.

Ah what am I doing, it’s just Jongup, must have been all these teenage books I’ve been reading. Oh and the sandwich too; it must have been the sandwich. Yup, that’s gotta be it.

After deeming it was the sandwich that caused my stomach to churn, I went over to the sink and washed my hands to begin with my Chucky piece. I took the paint and brushes from the cupboards and loaded my side of the table with the supplies. Jongup came from behind and stood there, and I knew what to expect.

“Zelo.”

“Zelo.”

“Zelo.”

“What, Jongup?” I fumed as I turned.

“Happy Birthday,” he said as he flicked wet water from his fingers to my face.

I shrieked and covered my face with my fingers. “Real mature Jongup,” I said as I wiped the droplets of water from my face.

“Ew your fingers; they look so long,” he said with a smirky expression on his face.

I shrieked yet again and hid my hands behind my body. He knew I was conscious of my hands and he just loves to use it against me for his entertainment.

“It’s like you’ve got alien hands or something,” he replies smugly when he saw my state of embarrassment.

“MOON JONGUP.”

“Yes?” He replied with a smile at the tip of his lips.

“GO AWAY.”

“Fine,” he huffed and left.

Finally some peace and quiet.

I finally started painting my sculpture and by the end of class I was done with my artwork’s clothes. I had packed my bag and planned to leave right after, if it weren’t for the hand I felt poking the side of my ribs. I turned and screamed at the same time and as expected, Jongup was beside me. 

“You mad at me?” He asked haughtily, as if he was ever serious about anything or anyone for that matter.

“No, dude, never, I’m never mad at you because you’re Jongup,” I said sarcastically and pulled a face at him.

“Good to know then, bye,” he said and patted by backpack.

Geez, when did he get so nice?

I exited the room to meet up with my friends by our lockers. One of my friends laughed and pointed to my back. I quickly turned and saw the handprint on my bag and cursed. “ YOU MOON JONGUP, YOU ARE SO LUCKY YOU’RE NOT HERE RIGHT NOW,” I turned and dusted off the print from my bag, thankful it came off easily.

“Yeah, cause instead he’s gonna give you a big makeout session behind that tree over there if he were,” my best friend Youngjae said.

“Ewww,” I replied in disgust.

“Oh not this again,” Yongguk, my other best friend said, “Just tell him you love him already.”

“I am not and you all know it,” I replied with dagger-filled eyes.

“Sure, whatever you say sweetie,” Himchan said as he emptied his lockers.

“Eh heh,” I said as I gave him my ‘ please’ face.

The group of friends were causing a ruckus again as usual but from a distance you were able to see a boy standing back as he watched his plan unfold.

Heh, it’s so fun messing with you Choi Junhong.

“Too bad you’re never going to tell him the truth though,” a voice said behind me.

“DAMNIT DAEHYUN,” I said as I grasped my heart, “I swear you’re gonna give me a heart attack one day.”

He looked at me once over before leaving. “You gotta tell him someday you know,” he said with his back towards me, “or you’re gonna lose him to someone else.”

I gave him the finger and he chuckled knowingly before leaving. I glanced over to the lockers by the art room and picked up my bag.

Even if it’s eating me up inside, I know we can never work. You’ll never see me past my smirks and jokes.

The boy turned and climbed up the stairs opposite the Ceramics room before glancing back and headed home.

Because I know you can't see these feelings I have for you.