“All is going to be alright.I promise.Now  I’m here and…and…” he said, while he… he…

 

He what?

 

“Aiiish! This is not good!” I yelled while I hit the laptop’s keyboard, which suffered, waking up from my love story, which apparently did not work so well.My shout echoeded quite well in the empty apartment.

 

 

“Jinja Mi Nah, you are  not good for either fanfics…” I was reading and re-reading that stupid paragraph that I had written, but something wasan’t ok. I took a sip from my hot coffee, hoping that this it would help, but still nothing.

 

“Aiiish-I said, ruffling my hair-Mi Nah, wake up, real life isn’t like a fanfic…”Yes. Indeed. I was right, and I knew it very well. Mad, because of my epic fail, I took my coffee cup in both hands, I pulled my long sleeves, melting a little in my chair and I gazed at the window in front of me and at the huge rain drops which hitted it with power.It rains. It rains again.

 

“Perfect. Now even the weather is against me...” No that I didn’t like the rain. I loved it, but now I wasan’t exactly in the mood. She reminds me of some memories… Not so happy memories…

 

Oh, I remembered. Yes, life is’t like a fanfic, or a drama, or a movie. In the real life it doesn’t exist “I’m here for you and I will be forever” or “All is going to be alright”. Nobody apologizes when it is not his faul…Nobody runs after you in the rain and nobody will do anything to make you comeback to him…Nobody…

 

A known sound woke me up, back to reality. I had been lost again in my thoughts for who knows how much time. It was my phone wich got a message. In the firt phase I wanted to ignore it, knowing from whom was the message, but my curiosity made me stad up  lazy from my chair and go to my bed, where I had thrown my phone a while ago.

 

“…I have to chage my background imagine…Pabo!” I didn’t delete my screen photo with me and Kyuhyun kissing…I felt again that pain in my chest and the feeling of ‘I want to die.”Anyway.I think that I stared at the picture for 10 minutes.

 

“I miss you Kyu…” I whispered with a broken voice. I could not help but say it. Apparently nor the tears that started to fall on my cheecks could not help but come out.

It does’t bother me. This means that I loved him, but…Mi Nah, forget! Open the message now!

 

Message:” Ya! Stop ignoring me and answer! I’m worried for you… Mi Nah…Come on…Let me help you…”

                                                                                                                             Luhan

Exactly what I thought.It was Luhan. My best friend.I rised my hand to get my pillow.I was about to cry again…for the hundred time in the last 5 days…In the silence of the big apartment, the only thing that it was in my mind was the  mistake that I made…

 

“Why? Why I had to do that? Why it is like this?” This questions were those which haunted me, but not a response was forming in my mind. With teary eyes and broken heart, in my mind started again that night…

 

FLASHBACK

 

Night. Kyu’s house, 5 days ago. After he came home from the rehearsals I could’t resist, so I told him.

 

“Kyu…I’m sorry but I can’t anymore…Maybe it is too late to say it now, after 5 months since we are together, but…I want a break…Until now we argued many times, I now, and we always got back together. Although it's been so long I still feel foreign to you… It is my fault…I think that I accepted to early that we are in a relationship…I haven’t said a word till now because I thought that this situation it will change in time… But I was wrong. Kyu I’m sorry… I wanted to be friends in the beginning…I mean close friends, so we would fall for each other because of our way of being who we are… Now is too late…The relationship beetwen us changed a lot… I want to try again to be a friend for you… So…in this break, if I mean or I ever meant something for you, I hope you will think at what I said because I NEED YOU.” This was what I told him before I took my coat and my phone and I went out of his house, going to my apartment…The pain and the disappointment started to control me. The cold raind drops were those who woke me back to the reality.

 

“Great… now it stars to rain…” I wanted to die. In this way maybe I could stop the pain from my chest. It may be stupid but all I could think about was that moment in a movie when the guy, soaked, takes the hand of the girl and apologisez for what append, or simply kisses her in the rain…

 

“Yeah…The scene that it will never happen…”

 

END OF THE FLASHBACK

 

I know what I told him. Those words remained in my mind all this days, and No, I don’t regret what I said, but…Not the pain that I fell it the one which took me by surprise, but his reaction…I thought that he woul try to say something or stop me, but no, he just stood there, whith a blanck expression and looked into my eyes…In that moment my word collapsed. What does it means? I guess this is one of the reasons why I left him…He was never doing something to show me his feelings…

 

Ah…From then it passed already a week. Not even a call or a message from him…Since then I’m lying isolated in my, apartment, away  from the world and all that it could hurt me. I know, I know, I’m a mess. I barely ate this days, and crying is something normal. But I stil hope and I still…wait. I don’t want to say it, but it think that the time has come…

 

After I  wiped the tears from my cheeks, I got up prom my bed and I went to the door.While I was walking I saw my reflexion in the mirror. Only then I found the courage and  the strength to say those words which I was afraid of…

 

“Mi Nah…He won’t come back…Is over…”

 

Comment please? ^^ <3 right?...