" Oh god I'm realllly sorry... The cream is all over you! Haha... That's what she said amiright? Lolz!!! Oh. Sorry. It's my fault. What? Are-Are you sure?...Fine, I understand. Its really okay dude... just go. I was planning on meeting up with a few friends in like an hour anyway." And thus, the biggest lie of the century was told right there. I'm pretty sure Ryan Lai could tell too, but he sure as hell wasn't showing it when he scampered the out of the the food court in Woodfield Mall. Don'tcryDon'tCryDon'tCry...that four year old is staring at you. Its okay, this is only the fourth (Fifth actually..Did I say you could talk voice inside my head? I'm going crazy aren't I.) time I ever got stood up by a guy. I should be used to being left behind by now...\

I WANNA BE THE VERY BEST THAT NO ONE EVER WAS

... I should really change my ringtone (said no Pokemon fan ever) I thought absently while fumbling with my phone. "Hello?"

"Wassup Little Playaaa?" asked my friend Mechelle. I could hear her slurping up her kimchi noodles over the phone again. How she stays skinny is anyones guess.

"....."  She really needs to stop calling me that.

" How's RyLai? You guys getting cozy or what?

"Or what. I spilled  vanilla latte on his pants."

"Girl you cray. At least you-"

"I made a 'That's what she said' joke T.T" Now it was time for her to be silent. I forgot how serious Ryan was. He didn't really get jokes. I never really saw him laugh actually.

".... and?" Slurp slurp. 

"I said lolz...you can imagine how enchanting I was"

"What did i tell you about using your weird internet language? SAY IT."

"Not in public. Blahblahblah I GET IT!!!" 

"About time. I'll pick you up in an hour kay? And quit being such a spazz." 

"Thanksloveyoubye" I was eager to hang up. I hate humans. Maybe I should date a robot.

I was about to get up when I realized that drips of my latte were clinging to my skirt. I immediately GTFOED and sprinted to the nearest bathroom wobbling in three inch heels which I would have never, ever have worn before today. 

" Well...this isn't too bad right?" I was standing on the sink trying to survey all the damage done to my skirt. It looked like Lindsay Lohan snorted liquid out of her nose. It was that bad. I glanced around. No one had been here for seven  minutes. It was a lazy noon TTuesday. Not many people were here. Cautiously, I slipped off my skirt so I could scrub the stains out. This was the most awkward thing I had ever done in my life. My cheeks were burning even though no none was there. But lucky me, it was about to get a lot more awkward when a skinny Asian guy on the small side entered the bathroom. We just stared at each other for a few seconds. Then quickly without blinking an eye I grabbed my shoe and threw it at his forehead. He crumpled against the wall immediately

And that is when my whole life turned upside down.