Wú Yì Fán, that's the name of the man that I always had a special feelings for. The word 'like' is an understatement to what I see him as, and the word 'love' is just not really me. That word is devious my grandma used to tell me, it brings people to nowhere when they could be doing something productive somewhere. Maybe my grandma is just bitter due to the fact that her marriage wasn't a pleasant one. It scares me. If I did 'love' this person, I'll probably end up just like her. It will be much worse for me because I have been zoned somewhere by him. Dongsaeng zoned? Friend zoned? Or even worse sister zoned. 

I practically grew up under his radar. I was 1 month old, he was 7 yrs. old. I entered elementary, he is going to advance to high school soon. Our parents are really tight, if that word brings justice to their relationship. Our families would eat dinner together at least 3 times a week and celebrate festivities together. I guess that's why I developed this weird feelings for him. He is the only guy that I interact daily, it was as if we breath, sleep, and fart the same thing. He was my reliable 'oppa'. 

That was until when I was in 3rd grade and he decided he wants a girlfriend (he was a junior). I was young and didn't really know what I'm feeling towards him. I concluded it as jealousy. He brought her once for dinner and I acted 'bratty' (that's what he said) when I told him I wanted to sit next to him. That girl looks soo pretty, mature and well-developed unlike me that hasn't even hit puberty, yet. I forgot her name now, but I remember she's a devil in disguise. Her words are like venom, but to my parents and his parents during that night,they were words of a true lady.

He graduated, and then there's me who is just about to enter the 5th grade. After that, everything was a blur. I never saw him anymore because he went to Canada to pursue his career on being an oncologist. He's a capable man, believe me when I say he will make it. His parents stayed here in South Korea and continued being our neighbor. I'd sleep in their house whenever my parents are doing some bussiness trips. I never asked them about him, because I don't wanna know how he's doing there. He might have met some hot Canadian girl for all I care. That is until his mom announced that he will be coming back to Korea to continue his residency.

It will be in a week. I'll finally see the 25-year-old Wu Fan and how he grew up to be such a 'fine young man'. That's how my parents described him when Mrs. Wu showed them a picture of him. Of course, I did not look. I wasn't ready. My feelings for him was still unknown and if I saw him, I might end up having a unrequited love. I learned that from my friends back in 5th grade when they saw me crying because he was leaving. They told me that is when you like someone but the feelings' not mutual.

It's been 7 years since that day he left. I've grown and moved on, I think by the time I see him this week, I'll be ready to face him.

But, boy was I soo damn wrong.