I love you my dear

Maybe times I’ve tried calling

I’ve been thinking about what to say…

Even as I fall asleep and wake up, I can’t stop myself from wanting to find you

Look at me, look at me now

Although it feels awkward because I’ve changed so much, wait

Let’s not be too far apart, I make a promise to the world ahead of me

A 20 years old man is walking slowly along the corridor. He let the spring breeze blow long hair slowly. He closes his eyes and thinking about the memories he left behind this past 1 year, the sad fate that he want to forget the most from his life. He and his family move to New York after that incident, the saddest thing that changes his life forever. He lost his half soul, his twin brother, in the car accident 1 year ago and he keep blaming himself for it. The condition become worse because his mother cannot let his twin brother go, she keeps mistaken to call him with his twin name and it is really hurt. How can you tolerate it when your own mother loves your twin more than you and they wish that your twin is the one who survived and you are the one who die?!!

“Jaejoong!!!” someone call him from behind and it shocks him. He could feel his already hurt heart hurt even more. He turns his body and look to who call him.

“Hey!!!” the man waved happily at him and run towards him. That man hugs him once he reaches that person.

“Yunho~ah…..” he looks at the one hugged him lovingly.

“Ne….” Yunho smiles happily.

“Come to your sense boy!! I’m not Jaejoong!! I AM KARAM!!” he shouts loudly to Yunho and release himself from Yunho’s hug.

“Mianhae Yunho, I know you miss my twin, but please…. I’m not him… he is dead already….” He said it with the sad tone.

“I know you stressed so much because his death. I know you love him very much…. But.. Can’t you see?? It is me… it is me… Karam… I’m not Jaejoong!”

He get more frustrated knowing that everyone around him realize him as Jaejoong, not Karam. It make sense if they do so, Jaejoong is one of the popular student in the school. He is really warm and get along well with everyone. He doesn’t know why but they have really different behavior despite the reality that they are twin brother identically. And as the result now, who live in everyone’s heart is Jaejoong, not him. He is dead already from long time ago.

He walks and leaves Yunho who stands like statue, having no soul. He wipes his tears and walks following the boy from behind.

“I’m sorry Karam…. I’m really sorry…. I just….” He tried to speak once he reaches the boy hand.

“Gwaenchana…..” he forms a sweet smile on his face.

“I know it must be hurt for you to receive it” he hugs Yunho warmly and caressing his cheek. Yunho gives him smile and they go to class together.

Once they enter the class, everyone stop talking and look at them. Jaejoong feels uncomfortable and takes his seat immediately, ignoring everyone’s look at him.

Yunho sits just in front of him and starts to open his book. He looks at the seat beside him. His twin supposed to sit there, accompany him. But he doesn’t there anymore. The warm Jaejoong is not there anymore. Now he is left behind all alone and suffers.

“Hyung!!!!” a boy runs to him and handed him a paper, he reads it and frown one of his eyebrow.

“Let’s follow this competition, hyung!! You really good at singing and dancing!!” the boy explain it excitedly.

That boy, Changmin, is just younger a year from him. He has really brilliant brain that Karam admire so much. Changmin is in the one class with him, sits just in front of his twin. He has been in love with him since he sees him from the first time. That cheerful expression, his monster attitude towards the foods, and his anger really make him fall for Changmin.

“And because this competition is for couple, I think you and Yunho hyung will be good together!! You two are the best couple in the world!!” he laughs after saying it.

“If only he is here…. I’ll definitely ask him to be my partner!” his tone sounds so sad.

Yunho grabs Changmin’s arm immediately and give him fierce look. He stands up from his seat and run outside the class, heading to the restroom for crying his hearts out.

Even the one I love cannot recognize me, cannot realize that I am here….

*Flashback*

“Jaejoong~ah…. Look at that boy, isn’t he gorgeous?” Jaejoong shook his head when takes a look to the one his twin pointed at. He nods and back to read his novel. That was the fourth time he asks him to look at Changmin.

“Yah!!” Karam shouts at him and takes the novel he reads.

“Yah!! Kim Karam!! I’m reading it!! Give it back to me!! Ppali!!” he shouts and earning a soft hit on his heads from his twin.

They fight towards the novel for some minute and do not realize someone watching them. That person walks closer and grabs the arm of one of them.

“Yah! Kim Jaejoong! Why are you fighting again with your twin, huh?!” Yunho never failed to recognize which one his lover is thought they look really alike. Yunho hugs his lover after pulling him closer.

“Yunnie…. He took my novel..!!” Jaejoong pointed to his twin.

Yunho laughs and ask Karam to give it back. Jaejoong stuck his tongue to his twin and sits again.

“What is it, Karam?! You looked so pissed off” Yunho asks his lover’s twin.

Karam stay still and do not want to talk. He is embarrassed and shy toward others. Even it is his twin lover.

“He won’t say it, Yunnie…. He is just…. You know…. Falling in love with that monster!” Jaejoong take glance to his twin and back to read. Karam widened his eyes cannot believe his twin say it loudly and he is sure the entire class can hear it.

He looks down immediately to hide his blushing face. Yunho notice it and laugh like hell. Everyone turn to look at Yunho now.

“Say it to him then…. He is a kind person” Yunho taps his shoulder lovingly and turns to his lover.

“Back home with me, ne…. Stay at my place this night, please… I’m alone at home, my parents are abroad” he whines to his lover like a child and he knew it always succeed to make him agree.

“Ok! Karam…. Tell eomma I’m not home today. I will accompany my baby and maybe we will.......” Yunho shuts his lover’s mouth immediately.

“Ok! Araso… I can understand what you mean Jaejoong” he answers it with uninterested tone in his voice.

*Flashback End*

You make me walk around
You make me cry
Like an idiot, like a child
Just laugh it off

He skips his class and cries his heart out at the garden. He doesn’t care if everyone looks at him with curious eyes. The memories he had with his twin keep flashing in his head.

If only you are here, Jaejoong…. I won’t be this suffer. How come the one I love cannot recognize me?!

“Stop crying, ne… he is just mistaken” someone pats his shoulder lovingly.

He lifts his head to look at the person, Yunho stands beside him and smile sweetly.

“Do you want me to help you to get him?!” Yunho offers him a help.

Again, he looks that sad eyes of Yunho, but he doesn’t know why.

“Are you sure?!” he asks with full of hope.

“Of course” Yunho answer shortly.

“Thank you Yunho!!! I love you!! Jaejoong must be really happy!!” he hugs Yunho tightly.

“Ne… he is happy now… I love you too….” Yunho answer in happy tone.

-The Next Day-

The closer I get
More scared I get
But this love cannot be stopped

Changmin sits under the tree alone. He doesn’t have any clue why did he have to wait for Yunho there. He reads his book over and over again, get bored.

“Just go…” Yunho orders the one in front of him.

“Yah!! Don’t push me like that. Araso… I’ll go” and he walks leaving Yunho behind.

Yunho looks at him and tear began to fall from his eyes.

From far away
If I can stare at you just for a moment…Like this…
If I can look at your happy face… that is enough for me… That is love

“Changmin~ah….!!” He calls the boy.

“Hyung!!” Changmin is about to leave the place when he came. But he stopped immediately looking at something in his arm.

“You bring me lunch??!!!” his eyes bright.

“Ne…” he nods and sits beside Changmin.

“Where is Yunho hyung?! You make lunch for him too, don’t you?!” Changmin asks with his mouth full of food.

He could only nods, lying. He didn’t make some for Yunho, he makes it special for Changmin.

He keeps starring at Changmin who eat like monster. He doesn’t take some for himself.

“You are really a good chef hyung!! I’m sure Yunho hyung must be happy having a beautiful and smart love