No More.
Paranoia
She slammed the boot of the car with a loud bang.
'Finally, I'm putting an end to my misery. I'm finally brave enough to stand up for myself.'
She walked to the driver's seat, turning the keys and igniting the engine, pulling away from the driveway.
Her eyes were glassy as she turned off the main road into the expressway. At this time of the night, not many cars were about. Only a few cars here and there, those who are returning half drunk from a late night party.
She sniffed, blinking back her tears which were making her sight blurry. After tonight, she'd put an end to her pain.
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"! How dare you talk to other guys? Are you flirting? You were cheating on me, weren't you?!" he screamed, pulling her hair harshly and throwing her onto the bed of their shared apartment.
She struggled to get up, "No! I wasn't! He is just a friend, I already told you! Why won't you believe me.."
"Lies!" he hollered, shoving her back down onto the bed, her head hitting the wall with a thud. Her vision stared to become hazy, partly because of the tears that were forming, and partly because of the impact from the hit.
He took a glance at her form, curled up into a fetal position on the bed, sobbing uncontrollably. He felt his heart clench, but left her nevertheless, grabbing his coat and keys before slamming the door shut, locking her indoors. This was his punishment for her – always has been.
Whenever he felt that she had been cheating on him, which she obviously didn't, he would lock her indoors until he felt that she had learned her lesson.
It became a cycle. They fight, he locks her up, he gets back, they make up, and then the cycle repeats again.
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The car took a turn into a deserted dirt road. The rocks made the car bounce and bump about and for a second, she worried about how he was holding up in the trunk of the car.
But that thought was washed away when she remembered their most recent fight two days ago.
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She was finally able to make time to meet her long time best friend, Kim Himchan. Ever since she started got into this relationship, she barely had any time for him. When the relationship progressed, she couldn't see Himchan even if she had the time. HE certainly didn't allow that.
They met at a cafe, and she happily jumped into Himchan's arms the moment she saw him standing by the door, smiling at her.
Himchan was like an older brother that she never had and that was why she felt so comfortable around him.
Little did she know that there was someone in the corner of the cafe, seething in anger while watching her laugh to Himchan's jokes, smile at Himchan, brush her fingers across Himchan's arms.
Himchan.
Himchan.
Himchan.
Oh how he hated Himchan.
When she got home that night, he was already there, waiting to pounce.
"Where were you?" he demanded once she stepped through the door.
She barely had time to put her shoes away before he dragged her by the arm, into their room.
He threw her onto the bed roughly before bending down to pull on her hair. She yelped in pain, her fingers closing around his hand that was tightly gripping onto a fistful of her hair.
"Let me go!" she fought back. But the harder she fought, the tighter his grip on her would be.
It was another one of their fights, yet another stage of their cycle and she was getting so drained, so tired of it all.
Her fingers loosened, and she just let him to whatever he wanted to do. She knew his temper like the back of her hand. The more she resisted, the angrier he'd get; and that was always the case.
But this time, once she stopped fighting back, he did what she never thought he'd do – he reached out a hand and slapped her hard across the face. He then left in a huff, once again slamming the door behind him.
She was shocked. Way beyond shocked.
Never once has he slapped her, ever. Yes, they constantly fought. Yes, he was obsessive to the point where she could hardly breathe. He followed her everywhere, keeping an eagle's eye on her.
And yes, she tolerated it. She always gave in.
But he has never laid a hand on her, at least, not until now. She could feel her final strand of patience slowly slipping away from her as she cried herself to sleep that night, curled into a fetal position.
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Her grip on the steering wheel tightened as she stepped hard onto the accelerator. Tears were threatening to fall but she held them back.
'No, I'm not gonna cry no more.' she told herself. She has had enough, enough of this relationship. Enough of his obsessiveness.
She was suffocating and she knew it, he knew it. But he just couldn't leave her alone.
He was always round the corner, silently watching her, seeing if she made any contact with guys.
Spying on her to see if she was cheating, calling her suddenly and asking where she is, although he already knew.
And he relished in the fact that her face will always pale upon receiving his call, knowing that she will be too afraid of him to leave him.
She belonged to him, and no one else. HE was the one who calls the shots, HE was the one who has the right, HE was the one who will make sure that she doesn't leave his sight.
She stopped by a deserted gas station to top up some gas, at the same time buying a barrel of oil.
She lit her cigarette, inhaling a huge mouthful of air and exhaling.
After a few minutes, she got back onto the car and continued to drive, farther and farther away from the city, away from civilization.
Their love hadn't always been like this. They were a normal couple, envied by girls and guys. The perfect match, beautiful girl and a way too handsome guy.
They loved each other and they only needed one another. Love was all they knew.
He cherished her like a pearl, and she loved him back.
They trusted each other to be faithful to each other and things were fine and dandy.
But somewhere along their second year together, things started to change.
He started being verbally abusive, scolding her at times and accusing her of cheating when she didn't.
She thought that it was just a phase, that it would pass eventually, but it didn't. And instead, things escalated and before she knew it, she was stuck in a never ending cycle.
But she loved him. She still does. She loves him deeply and she has tried so many times to reason with him.
He does listen, but only for a few weeks. And then, they'd be back to square one.
This carried on for another year and she has gotten quite used to it, though unconsciously, this has drained her emotionally and physically.
Not only that, it seems that she has been cut off from all her friends.
It was in the wee hours of dawn when she pulled to a stop right beside a swamp.
The insects were chirping and it was cold, just like her heart. Once she stepped out of the car, she could smell the decomposing of wood and leaves, and somehow, she felt that it was their love that was rotting.
She opened the trunk of the car only to reveal him, bound and gagged.
"I loved you so much. But that's all in the past now, Jung Daehyun. Goodbye." she gave him a gentle kiss on his lips before reaching behind him to grab the barrel of oil.
Taking a deep breath to steel herself, she poured heaps and heaps into him and around the car before slowly walking away, leaving a trail to where she stood, approximately a hundred meters away from the car.
And with a flick of her wrist, she took her lighter and stared at the flame for a few seconds before shutting her eyes tightly and throwing it behind her.
The fire from the lighter caught onto the oil, and a trail of flames came to life, quickly reaching the car.
Five. I love you, but I have to do this.
A memory of your smiling face.
Four. You left me no choice, I was suffocating in our relationship.
Your soothing voice that used to lull me into slumber.
Three. I tried to change you, but you didn't.
A picture of us cooking on your birthday.
Two. The way you'd pull on my hair and cause me pain.
How you'd always gently tie my hair into a loose bun every morning.
One. I'm sorry, but this isn't love anymore. It used to be, but not anymore, I don't wanna cry no more.
How we used to kiss under the mistletoe every christmas.
The car burst into flames, and so did her heart.
The tears that she had been holding for so long came falling from her eyes.
As she listened to the crackling of the flames, she squatted on the ground hugging her knees tightly to her chest.
It's over. It's all over now.
A/N: Yet another oneshot. It seems that I have many ideas for oneshots, but none for my ongoing stories.... T___T
Anyway, do leave me some comments yea? ^^
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