W o r d   C o u n t :  4 0 9 3
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“Xiumin!” She beamed as she hugged him tight. He gladly took her in his arms before he gave her a tight squeeze around her waist. “Yes sweetheart?” He asked with his loving voice that made her tingle a little inside. “I’m not leaving! I’m staying!” she beamed as she wasn’t going to move to the states for the time being. She managed to persuade her dad to let her stay here to finish high school with her boyfriend. She doesn’t know what’s going to happen after high school but she knows she wants to spend the rest of her high school years with him.

She was sixteen and she had two more years of high school. She hated studying and whatnot, but with Xiumin by her side, she wouldn’t mind attending high school for the rest of her life. She knew Xiumin as a kid and it was surprising for her that he developed feelings for her considering he was one of the quiet kids in school. People thought he was mute and deaf even but she was the only one who thought otherwise. Others saw him as an antisocial kid while she saw him as shy. People called him deaf but she called him quiet. His feelings for her sparked up like fire one day when she asked him his name when they were just ten.

On the other hand, she was practically perfect besides the fact of her medical condition. Her eyes were the only reason why she thought people wouldn’t want to be with her. She had this condition whereby she needed surgery for her eyes as not long ago she got into an accident but she survived it. The accident damaged her eyes but she didn’t really notice it until one day she woke up not being able to see anything and she was brought to the doctors. For Xiumin, he was grateful she was safe and sound besides her eye condition. Ever since, she could still see but doctors said chances are high she might wake up being legally blind.

“Don’t lie to me Hae Ri.” His eyes widened as he broke the hug to place his hands on her waist. “Does this face look like it will lie to you?” she asked as he nodded his head with a pout. She pecked him on the lips before she giggled. “This girl isn’t lying! I’m staying!” she chuckled before she hugged him again.

After a long night with Xiumin, he was staying over as usual. Her parents loved Xiumin like his own son and would love him to be their son-in-law. Marriage was far away from them but their parents knew Xiumin was the one for her since the day she introduced him to them. “Honey, is your vision alright today?” her mother asked in a worried tone before she gave an assuring nod. “It’s just a little bit blur but I’ll be fine.” She chuckled before her mother gave her a worried look. “Mom, I’ll be fine.”

“The doctor said chances are high you’ll wake up blind. I wouldn’t want that for you.” She whispered so Xiumin wouldn’t hear even though he was upstairs waiting in her room. “Look mom,” she breathed out as she took a step closer. “The doctor said even with the surgery, I may not survive it. He said if I wanted the surgery, it should be done a long time ago and if I become blind.. It’s alright.” Her mother gasped but she placed a hand over her mother’s mouth. “If it’s fated for me to be blind, it’s meant to be.”

“Don’t you think you should tell Xiumin before this happens?” she advised her daughter who was more than ready to become blind if she was stuck with this kind of fate. “Y-Yeah, I probably should.. Shouldn’t I?” she chuckled dryly before she gave a kiss on her mother’s cheek. “I’ll be upstairs with him if you need me.” She smiled before her mother gave a nod. On her walk upstairs, it was blurry for her and she nearly fell down the stairs because she couldn’t see the steps properly but she managed to make her way to the door. She opened the door and she heard his voice. “I was wondering where my angel went.” He joked as the moment she closed the door he grabbed her by her waist to make her land on top of him on the bed.

He rolled over until he was lying down beside her with her in his arms. “Here.” He said as he sat up until his back came in contact with the bed rest of her bed. She crawled up beside him as he enveloped her with her arms around his waist. She gulped as she was staring at his face with her head on his chest but it was a little blurry. She tried her best to make it clear as she feared it was her last time seeing his face. He felt like she was staring at him so he looked down at his girlfriend who didn’t avert her attention away. “What are you staring at?” he asked softly before he used one of his hands to place it on his cheek. “Is there something here?” he asked as she shook her head.

He furrowed his eyebrows before putting his hand back on her waist. “T-Then what’s wrong?” he asked as he saw a tear rolling down her cheek. “B-Baby?” he called out softly as she gazed down to stare at his chest. “Remember that time, I said I was going to get surgery for my eyes because of the accident? A-And I said that I would be fine without the surgery?” she whispered softly and hoped he didn’t hear her but he did. He nodded his head and she let out a dry chuckle. “Well the doctors said that I may lose my vision one day if I don’t take the surgery but even with the surgery chances are high I won’t survive. T-That’s why I didn’t go for the surgery.”

His mouth gaped open but he couldn’t say anything. “I just wanted you to know that there will come a day where I’ll wake up blind and I wouldn’t want you to feel worried. Even if you do, and if you want a breakup, I wouldn’t blame you for it.” She gulped as she pushed his arms away. It’s not because she doesn’t love him and would use her blindness as an excuse but she thought of it from Xiumin’s point of view. It may be burdensome to love someone who can’t even see you. She wanted the best for Xiumin.

 “So if you want a breakup, do it now.” She croaked out with another tear rolling down her cheek. Everything inside of her was telling her not to say those words but she felt like it was the right time to. She felt like it would be selfish of her to want him for herself even though chances are high she would be blind. “Stupid, stupid girl.” He muttered softly before he sat up from the bed. She shut her eyes tight as she was holding back the tears but her eyes opened when he pulled her up to make her sit up with her legs crossed opposite him on the bed. “Listen to me,” he breathed out as he placed his hands on her shoulders.

“I’m never leaving you, ever. I don’t know why you even have the thought I would leave you just because chances are high you’ll be blind. I don’t care and it will never be the reason to why I would break up with you. Do you hear me?” he asked her as she nodded her head with another tear rolling down her cheek. He moved his hands to cup her cheeks before leaning his forehead against hers. “Now stop crying and look into these pair of eyes that belong to the person who loves you dearly. Are you taking in as much as you can to remember these pair of eyes Hae Ri?” he asked as she nodded her head. She wanted to in as much as she could see of him just in case she woke up blind one day.

“Now close your eyes.” He whispered softly and she did as she was told. “What do you see?” he asked as she smiled softly. “I can imagine your face perfectly.” He smiled before he pulled her down to lie down beside him on the bed. “Then that’s all that matters. If you lose your vision one day, I’ll be your pair of eyes. I promise you.” He assured her as she snuggled up into his chest. “X-Xiumin?” She called him out softly as he responded with a soft “Hmm?”

“I love you, so much.” She whispered as he hugged her tight. “I love you too.”

The next morning unraveled quickly and his arms were wrapped around her waist. He woke up earlier before her and he looked down on the girl that he loved. “Even if you’re blind, I’ll love you the same. I promise you this.” He gulped before he brushed strands of her hair away from her face. He did feel sad that she may not see him anymore but that didn’t make him love her any less.

He pulled his hand back and shut his eyes the moment she twitched her nose. She opened her eyes and she started to feel like her guts were twisted. She furrowed her eyebrows before she gulped. She frantically tried to focus on an image but it was impossible. She couldn’t see anything but a bright ray of light since her curtains were open, letting sunlight to lighten up the room.

Xiumin opened his eye to peek at her and his mouth gaped open when he saw her expression. “Baby, is there something wrong?” he asked as she let out a breathy sigh. gaped open but she couldn’t say anything. A tear rolled down her cheek and Xiumin had put the pieces together. He got up and lifted her up to hug her tight. She squeezed him just as tight as he her hair. “Shh..It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to cry.” He assured her as she started to cry hard. “I can’t see your face anymore.” Her voice cracked as Xiumin broke the hug to place his hands on her shoulders.

“I said it yesterday when you could see, and I’ll say it again today when you can’t. I love you the same regardless of your disability. Like I promised you, I’ll be your pair of eyes from now on. Whether you’re blind, whether you’re not, I love you the same and that will never change. Can you picture me in your mind?” he asked as she nodded her head as she looked at him straight in the eye even though she couldn’t actually see his eyes but she could picture them. “That’s all that matters. You can see me with your mind and heart. I’ll stay there forever.” He cupped her cheeks before he whispered, “Do you hear me?” She nodded her head before she managed to smile. “I do.”

“English!” she chimed as she took out her English textbook. She felt arms wrapping around her waist and she jerked up at the sudden touch but she didn’t push the arms away as the touch felt so familiar to her. “You’re missing one more subject.” He whispered into her ear and she chuckled before she tilted her head a little. “What is that?”

“The subject of my heart.” He whispered before he leaned away to give a kiss on her bare shoulder as she was wearing a blouse that exposed her shoulders. She tried to hide her giggle when he kissed her shoulder and he could easily sense that. “Oh, it tickles doesn’t it?” he questioned as she shook her head but her facial expression told him otherwise. He leaned over to kiss the other side of her shoulder and this time she placed a hand on the spot he had just kissed because she was using the other hand to hold her books. “Someone feel a little ticklish.” He chimed as she turned around to shut her locker before she leaned her back against it.

“Now now, don’t get scared in the morning.” He joked as she chuckled. “You’re being such a bun. Or should I say, Baozi?” she couldn’t help but use this nickname one of their close friends Luhan called him on him. Whenever Luhan called him that, Xiumin’s comeback for Luhan would be ‘Deer boy’ and it was absolutely hilarious to her to watch them bicker at one another. “So you’re using the name Baozi on me too?” he was using a sulky tone to let her know he was sulking but she would know that regardless of how he sounded. She knew him too well. She managed to reach for his face in just one try to place her hand on his left cheek. “But that’s what I love about you. And your cute cheeks.” She pinched his cheek lightly before he chuckled.

She was in class and as usual, everyone around her was cheerful and happy. Not because they were excited of coming to school, they used her as an inspiration. Even though she lost her sight, she was still the bubbly and cheerful self that never failed to make people around her happy, including the teachers. She understood the lessons perfectly and she didn’t need to take down notes. Instead she would record the lessons to listen to them again when she needed to understand something. During exams, it would be oral and verbal for her as she couldn’t write. The bell rang and she packed her things up. School had ended and everyone in the class made way for her to get out of the class. Just as she stepped out of the class, a pair of hands pulled her to the side and she gasped.

“It’s just me.” He chuckled as he was always amused to see her reaction. “You scared me.” She breathed out as he gave a kiss on her forehead when she shut her eyes tight. “I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help it.” He admitted as she shook her head. “Let’s go, today’s a special day. Do you remember?” he asked as she nodded her head. How could she not? It was their 3^rd year anniversary and she made something for him. He walked her back home and when they reached her front door, he opened the door for her to enter. She turned around and wouldn’t let him in. “Hey, don’t I get to come in?” he asked as she shook her head. “Let’s meet at our usual spot. I expect you to be there by 7.30p.m.” she smiled before he didn’t answer.

“B-Baby?” She called him out as she tried to reach for him as he leaned away to play with her. She furrowed her eyebrows and let out a slight pout before she gasped when a kiss was planted on her nose. “I got it. I’ll be there with your gift.” He smiled as she playfully reached out to slap his cheek and she succeeded. “You stupid bun.” She chuckled before he gave a peck on her lips. “I’ll see you.” He leaned away to ruffle her hair.

She got dressed in a pair of jeans along with a white long sleeved shirt that Xiumin had bought for her last year. She knew it was that exact shirt because she asked her mother before she put it on. Her mother did her hair and smiled at how her daughter looked. “Do I look alright?” she asked as her mother chuckled. “You look perfect.” Her mother handed her the gift she would give Xiumin. “Here’s your stick.” Her mother said as she chuckled. “Thanks.” She smiled as she made her way downstairs.

She was walking on the way there with a walking stick along with a box in her hands. A person was following behind her and she was too focused on reaching the venue safely she couldn’t tell there was a person following her. The person hugged her by her waist, causing her to drop her walking stick but she managed to grip tightly to the gift. “What did I tell you about walking alone?” she heard his voice and she smiled. “I-I just wanted to reach there by myself.” She admitted sheepishly before he kissed the side of her head. “You should’ve called me to walk you there. I wouldn’t want you to walk around like this, mmm?” she gave a nod before he picked up her walking stick. He linked his arms with hers so she wouldn’t need her walking stick.

When they reached the beach, they sat underneath a coconut tree that had their initials carved on it. He sat down beside her and the first thing she did was trying to find the carving. She had a hard time until Xiumin chuckled but guided her hand to the carving. “T-Thanks.” She muttered softly before Xiumin smiled. She run her fingers through the carvings and she smiled at the familiar words. “Hae Ri?” he called her out but she didn’t hear him because she was too into reminiscing back to the memories. “Baby.” He poked her arm and she jerked up. “Huh?” she let out a softly before she pulled her hand back.

He made her lean back on the tree trunk as he did the same. He placed a small box on her lap and she picked up the box. “What’s this?” she asked as he smiled again. “Open it.” He said as she did as she was told. Inside the box was a necklace with initials of his name, not hers. She reached for the necklace and she run her fingers through the initials, letting a smile creep onto her face when she could tell those were his initials. He grinned when he could tell she got it. She leaned away from the tree trunk and he took the necklace from her hands to put it on her. When it was around her neck she leaned back on the tree trunk. “I wish I could see it.” She muttered under her breath and Xiumin shook his head.

“As long as you’re happy with it, that’s all that matters. It doesn’t matter if you can’t see it.” Instantly she felt better. He always knew the right words to say. She reached for the box beside her to place it on his lap. “Well someone bought something bigger this time.” He joked as she shook her head. He opened the box and it was a small heart shaped cake. His eyes widened and his mouth gaped open. He turned to look at her with eyes wide open and she could easily tell he was shocked. “I had a little help, if that’s what you’re wondering.” She chuckled before he gulped to look back at the cake.

It looked flawless and it was perfect. Ever since she lost her sight, she gave up on baking but she wanted to bake a cake for him because it’s been ages since she’s made one. It took roughly about 10 tries for her to make a cake this perfect with the help of her mother as she wouldn’t let her mother help her apart from telling her what ingredients and setting the time on the oven. “You made a cake for me.” He breathed out as he closed the box to put it aside. “Thank you.” He chuckled as she smiled sheepishly. “It must’ve been hard for you.” He brushed her hair away from her neck and she bit her lower lip. “Don’t even deny it. It must’ve been hard.”

He tilted her head so he could face her and she shut her eyes tight because she knew what was going to happen next. He pressed his lips onto hers as his arms s around her waist. She managed to wrap her arms around his neck and he pulled her closer. He didn’t want to let go but he couldn’t help but break the kiss when he knew something was wrong. He felt something wet on his lips and he opened his eyes only to reveal his girlfriend in tears. “Baby, what’s wrong?” he whispered as he cupped her cheeks to wipe her tears away. “I-It’s nothing it’s just,” she breathed out as she pushed his hands away.

“I.. I just want to see you so badly.” She admitted as she gulped. “Every day, you can see me and my face but I would kill just to see yours again. I know I can imagine your face but I just want to see it again.” She sobbed as his heart ached at the sight. Always she would think of the burden he was going through but in all actuality, she was going through the same amount of pain too. He lifted her up and placed her on his lap with her legs sideways on the sand. She sniffed as she tried to reach for his face but she couldn’t find it. He guided her hand and placed it on his cheek. “See, I can’t even find your face properly.” She chuckled bitterly before another set of tears streamed down her face.

He his lips before he placed his hand on top of hers that was on his cheek. “I’ve said this plenty of times and I’ll say it again to make you realize how much I mean it. I know you want what’s best for me. I know you want me to be with a girl who can see my face but guess what? I don’t want anyone else apart from you. I don’t care if you can see my face because all I want is for you to feel my love and my heart. The most beautiful things in life are felt, not seen.” He pulled her hand away from his cheek to place it on his chest above his heart.

She could feel his heartbeat that was so calm and steady while hers was beating so fast, she thought it was going to explode. It was always like this, and she loved this feeling. “Do you feel that?” she nodded her head. “Do you feel this heart, beating just for you?” he asked as she nodded her head again as she pressed her lips together to stop the tears. “I want you to know that you’re the best one for me. You’re the only one for me and I want no one else. You’re mine and I’m yours.” He kissed the back of her hand before he whispered, “No one else.”

She managed to crack a smile before he placed her hands around his neck before he moved his hands to her waist. “Do you feel better now?” he asked as she leaned her forehead against his. She nodded her head and he grinned. “Good, because the sun had just set.” He pointed out but she couldn’t see, so why tell her? “You know I can’t see it.” She used her sulky tone on him and he chuckled. “I wasn’t done.”

“You weren’t?” she asked as he nodded his head even though she couldn’t see but she could tell he was nodding his head. “The sun had set, do you know what that means?” he asked as she shook her head. “It means you owe me another kiss.” He grinned as she managed to chuckle softly before granting his wish.