I felt like I was looking at him for the first time. The Jaebeom before me wasn’t the quiet and mysterious bad boy who stole the hearts of girls with the snap of a finger or the rude, overly confident man who was quick to scold me when I did or said something stupid. This man was nervous, fidgeting constantly in his seat as he wanted for me to speak. His emotions were painted all over his face, he was wearing his heart on the proverbial sleeve. The Jaebeom who sat in front of me had professed his love for me time and time again, without me even knowing it. “Y-You’re Romeo?” I said incredulously.

“Yeah…” He responded in the soft and quiet tone that I had long ago grown accustomed to. He shifted his weight awkwardly in his seat, never taking his eyes off my face in anticipation of my response.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He sighed and began to answer me, but I cut him off. “For months,” I started, “I’ve been suffering. From the kids at school to my parents, everything has just been going wrong. The only things that kept me going, the only things that kept me sane were the letters. For once, someone saw me as more than a punching bag or an easy way to get an A. They saw me as a girl, no, a woman. But, a letter can’t wipe my tears, a letter can’t hug me or kiss me or hold my hand and tell me it will be alright.” Tears began to spill over my cheeks steadily, clouding my view of his beautiful face. “Why did you wait so long? Why did you pretend for so long while I sat alone, hurting? You even knew how badly I wanted to find this guy and still, you said nothing!” I roughly brushed my tears away in frustration; I hated crying in front of others.

“Mina, please understand…” He reached for my hand, but I jerked out of his reach.

“No, Jay.” I said harshly, but I softened after a look of pure hurt distorted his flawless features. “I’m just…I’m just going to go, okay.” I threw some dollar bills onto the table to pay for the coffee I’d bought and left the café. As I made my way down the street, I could hear the sound of Jaebeom’s sneakers pounding against the pavement resonating from the rear.

“Mina!” He shouted, his voice louder than I’d ever heard it before. I ignored him and began to sprint across the sidewalk. I could see the bus pull up to the stop in the distance and the people waiting began to file in. I just had to go a little bit further, run a little bit faster. Just as the bus driver closed the doors, I slid through, landing clumsily on my feet and falling on my ; Jaebeom, on the other hand, was locked out and stubbornly slamming his fists against the glass to get my attention.

As if we were starring in some drama on the television, everyone on the bus stared at the scene unfolding before them. The bus driver looked down at me sympathetically. “Should I…Should I let him in?” He asked softly.

I stared up at him, debating for only seconds before I spoke. “Please…don’t.” I breathed out shakily, feeling the weight of tears in my throat. Turning to the door, I locked eyes with a pleading Jaebeom. We kept each other’s gazes until the bus pulled off, leaving him behind in a haze of exhaust.