“We need to talk”

I saw her in my peripheral vision, she’s leaning her side on the Seohyun’s bedroom’s door frame.

“Okay” I don’t know what’s thing she going to say, but I feel it’s not a good thing. That sentence always woke up unpleasant memory.

So we settled in the living room, her living room.

“What’s wrong, Fany?”

“I—You—We should meet lesser from now on”

“Hm? Why?”

“It’s not right”

“What’s not right?”

“Us”

“Us?”

“Just..”

“Okay then, what day can I come and take you and Seohyun out? For dinner maybe? Or lunch”

“Taeyeon, you don’t have to do that”

“I want to do that”

“For what?”

For what? Sometimes I asked it myself. For what I did all this? Tiffany was doing okay with Seohyun. Her parents watch her when she’s at work. Her financial is fine too. So for what, exactly?

“Uh” I can’t meet her eyes. I feel so complicated right now.

“For what, Taeyeon?”

“I—I just—“ my toes seems so much more interesting right now. “..I don’t know..” just like a wind, I whisper it to her, more likely to myself.

“Sigh. Please move on, Taeyeon” Tiffany held my hand. I feel the warm I’ve missed so much engulfed me in painful embrace.

“I—“ I can’t Fany, I love you “I’ll try”

Suddenly my phone rang, startled both of us. She drew her hand from mine, I feeling cold again.

“Go ahead, pick it up”

“Oh. Okay, excuse me”

I walked to the kitchen, massage my temple, feeling the tense knot there.

“Hello”

“Taeyeon”

“Jessica?”

“Are you busy?”

“Uh, not really”

“Where are you?”

“Uh…”

“… Tiffany’s, aren’t you?”

“Uh… kinda”

“You don’t have to hide it, you know. You do sound like I catch you cheating on me”

“Am I?”

“Very much”

“Sorry..?”

“What for?”

What for? That question again. I can’t seem to answer the simple question. Am I feeling guilty to her? Why?

“I’m… not sure..?”

“Stupid . Anyway, Can you accompany me to this party?”

“What party?”

“I don’t know, the whole office is coming but I don’t really feeling comfortable”

“Why?”

“I just feel it. Can you or can you not?”