TV.. TVXQ was gone? Yunho and Changmin had passed away? Was it real? My tears were rolling down when I watched the news. The accident. That accident took two souls of my bestfriends, my families.. Yunho and Changmin.

Oh My Lord, why did You take them?

What were their faults? Didn’t they the religious people? Was it a dream? Please someone told me that it was just a nightmare and I hoped that my alarm clock would ringing soon.

So stupid! Of course it was real. Death was the destiny of God, no one could escape the fate, even thougt the idol star like them.

I bit my lower lip firmly, until it bleed. Smarting. It was so smarting. But abandoned by someone that we loved of course it was more smarting, moreover abandoned away for a long time. Forever..

Did they in Heaven already?

If yes, I was sure that they were enjoying and happy there. But I didn’t know why, it felt a little sad to imagine them both happy, without us, JYJ.

We looked alike the part of body. If the hands hurt, then the eyes cried. If eyes cried, then hand wiped the tears.

That was us. We were one, we were family. It was so painful when I heard the news that they died in their spot on accident car. But I knew that they were in more pain than us.

God, could I met them? Just this once.. please..

“Hyung?”

I opened my eyes when I felt someone patted my shoulder softly.

“Ne?” I asked while staring those our youngest member’s eyes. Junsu.

“Hmm.. Can we.. back to Seoul? Please. I beg on you.” He pleaded with teary eyes. He.. was fighting back his tears. I could see it.

“I want it too, Su-ie. But.. I’m not sure that we can go. Does manager hyung let us to go to Seoul?”

“Hyung, please! This once.. Just once. We see them for the last time.” Junsu said while he was prostrating in front of me. Then I pulled him to stand.

“I want to go home to Seoul, like you. Where is Yoochun?” I asked him.

“I am here, hyung.” I saw Yoochun was standing near the door. He dragged the suitcase with him. “We will cancel our concert, because we will go to Seoul tonight.” He said.

“And.. No one can stop us. Yunho hyung and Changmin are more important than our job.” Junsu added.

I smiled while hearing them. Yes that was right. Yunho and Changmin were our priority right now. Sorry Bigeast.. We would cancel our concert for tomorrow. I was sure that you could understand our problem.

“Alright, prepare your things! We will go back to home, for Homin.”

“Thank you, hyung!” Junsu hugged me so tightly. I rubbed his back softly and said, “don’t crying! Uljima.. you make me want to cry too.”

Yoochun, who saw us then came closer and hugged us. “H-hyung.. they.. they were gone.” Yoochun sobbed. He was crying. “They left us, hyung.”

“Ne, hyung. They left us forever. I miss them.” Junsu replied.

I shook my head, hearing them. No. They were wrong. It was not true. Yunho and Changmin didn’t left, but we did. We left them.

“No, you are wrong. They didn’t leave us. But we did. We left Dong Bang Shin Ki.” I answered bitterly. “Now they are gone.” I added.

“Hyung..” Yoochun sobbed. “I want home.”

I nodded my head. I knew it. I must strong! I was their hyungs and.. Yunho’s replacement, leader of JYJ.

Their remains would be buried tomorrow morning. I wished that three of us could see them for the last time.

We would back to Seoul tonight, no matter what!