I could pass the days I wasn’t sure,

 because you were here.

I could always stay strong.

" I have brain cancer " He said in a low voice ; " I am going to die "

" What ? " a hysterical laugh echoed throughout the house " Stop fooling around Hyukjae "

" I am not fooling around, Donghae " he lowered his head " I am not "

" Yo-You "  Donghae's voice started cracking , his heart started etching , his head started spinning , his breath was fast it hurts ! his whole body was numb , he almost felt his heart stopped .

Cancer..  

Cancer..  

Isn’t that the same illness that killed his father ? isn’t that the same illness who took his beloved mother ?

Isn’t that the illness who eat your body up till you wish you die instead ?

Isn’t that the illness who probably going to take him too ?  

Hyukjae has cancer …

Hyukjae ..

My love ..

" Donghae " Hyukjae's eyes were pleading for strength  " don’t "

Don’t do that face .. don’t be like this ..

Don’t show me your tears .. don’t make me cry

Give me strength .. I need you more than anything ..

He took few steps forward him , he placed his both hands on Donghae's cheeks to make him feel his needs , his fears and his love " Look at me "  he smiled weakly " I am okay "

Donghae took a glance at Hyukjae's handsome face , he cant take it , he cant pretend he's strong

I cant

" You cant leave me !! " Donghae's eyes were crying , he started  hitting his chest once..  

" You cant die ! " twice ..

" What I am going to do if you die !! " thrice

Hyukjae's heart was etching , how he suppose to know , how he suppose to prevent death ; is that even possible ?

" Promise me you'll live Hyukjae " Donghae stopped hitting his chest and hugged him tightly    " Promise me !! "

" Baby " Hyukjae tried to let go of Donghae to look at him " Baby look at me " he repeated himself " please "

Donghae let go of him with his eyes all red , all pain , all desperate.. he knew Hyukjae cant promise , he cant ; but Donghae wanted anything to make Hyukjae as healthy as before .

" I cant promise " 

Don’t say that

" I don’t know if I am going to live or not "

No ..  

" But I am going to fight it baby ; not for me but for you "

Would you ?

" Promise me you're going to be there for me , promise you wont let me go till my heart choose to stop , promise me Donghae "

If tomorrow is covered with darkness and there is no sign
don’t be afraid,
As long as we keep holding our hands
we can go anywhere.

" Hey " Donghae's voice was weak " You're awake "

" Baby " Hyukjae tried to smile but his smile dropped when he saw him " You shaved your hair"

" I promised I wont leave you alone " Donghae smiled " sides I think I need a new style "

 " I am tired " Hyukjae said , it was the fifth time he took the chemotherapy for the past two months. During these days Donghae had never left his side , not physically , not emotionally . he never failed to bring the smile on Hyukjae's face . He never showed his weakness to him . Things were going from bad to worse. But he never lost hope he needed Hyukjae , he needs him.

" try to rest some more " Donghae kissed Hyukjae's forehead and started humming a song for him . it was the only way to make him forgets his pain and sleep .

Within 10 minutes Hyukjae had fallen asleep , Donghae kept holding his hands while watching how pale his love is . his fair blonde hair was all gone , his lips are dry and blue , and his body was skinner . he changed , but Donghae still finds him bueatiful , still thinks he cant get more handsome . he's the only one he loved

His first and certainly his last ..

" Mr. Lee " the doctor approached him with a that smile that all the doctors have " I am glad that Hyukjae is asleep now ; as I need to speak to you alone "

 Donghae didn’t like the way he talked , the way he smiled , he knew something is wrong       " What is it ? "

" We had a MRI scan for his brain this morning " the doctor mentioned " The tumor is getting bigger , the chemo is helping him to grow not to shrink therefore we need to stop the therapy "

" Y-You mean ?? " Donghae's throat dried out " He's going to—"

" Die , yes " the doctor added heartlessly " Whether he took the therapy or not he's going to die , but without the therapy he's going to live longer .. lets say three months ? "

" don’t we have any choice ? " Donghae's tears felled down as he tried to think

I will live thinking about you.
We are connected by our heart to heart.
Promise you.
What I want to tell you is just that I love you.
 

" Sing to me " Hyukjae said as his body was numb from the pain , his heart was over weighted  from  the illness , it has been a month since they cut out the therapy . he knew he's going to die  ,they both knew it .

Donghae was as pale as Hyukjae he wasn’t in a good shape either , he took a deep breath started to sing for his sweetheart

" You took my heart away .. when my whole world was grey ..

"You gave me everything .. "

Hyukjae's eyes started closing .. he can feel it .. he can feel it ..

And a lill bit more .." "

And when its cold at night""

Donghae's voice started shaking ..he tightened his grip

And you sleep by my side""

I love you Donghae ..  

I am sorry I cant make you happy anymore ..

I am sorry I cant wipe your tears ..

I am sorry I cant be at your side ..

"You become the meaning  of my life"

I love you ..  

"You become the meaning of …. "

Hyukjae's hand dropped as he was closing his eyes seeing the last thing he would ever see ' Donghae' his husband , his heart , his everything . he tried to smile his last one to give Donghae encouragement to give him hope ..  to show him his love

" My life " Donghae stopped singing as his tears started streaming on his face , he's gone , Hyukjae is gone , he left him alone , he's all by himself now .

" Wait for me love " Donghae said between his sobs " it wont be long and I will follow you "

He kissed him goodbye and smiled  bitterly .. now he can rest in peace , his pain is gone , he fought cancer but it was stronger than him  .. he tried , he knew Hyukjae tried for him but death was mean , cruel he took away his one and only ..

 Donghae will be okay but he will only live to die , he will be breathing but not living .. he will wait till he see his beloved again even if that means he has to die to meet him again

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Hello :) i know most of my subs are probably hating me for disapearing but here's the reason why , i wrote this shot and i know its probably not that good or its sad for nothing but here's the thing : its based on a true story and its my story . i met this wonderful guy 10 months ago , now he has cancer ,we discovered that 2 months ago all of what i wrote happned to me and him (excpet the last part cause he's still alive YAAY ;___;  ) i just needed to let out all what i feel so i dont care if its not my best story i just need to write my feelings down 

i know alot of friends here and i need you guys to pray for him ,, idont want my story to become true :'( i dont

thanks for reading it and i am sorry i made Hyukjae die :'| i just needed an extra sad story so TADAA here's wt u got 

love you guys 

ps . the song matchs perfectly right ??? god i love this song KRY rocks wohoooooo