Soohyun

Since Dongho came into my life—I mean our life, my heart’s beats weren’t the same anymore. Whenever he calls me, or just shoots a smile, my heart would race like crazy. It makes me tremble. It makes me noxious—in a good way. Whatever he does makes me smile. Whenever he tries to make jokes, even in the lamest possible, I’d laugh just to make him feel adored. And when I notice those things, I realized that I fell for this man, so hard.

And I don’t know if I should continue these feelings. I mean, I think it’s wrong to love a step-brother. Or it isn’t? I don’t know. I think it’s really wrong. Not just because he’s my step-brother, but also having a hidden feelings for him isn’t a good idea either. What bothers me the most is that he’s not like me. He’s straight. And when he finds out I’m gay, he’d be disgusted. He’d step away from me. He wouldn’t want to see me. Man, thinking of those circumstances already hurts me. What more if I confessed to him.

I was jotting down my Biology scratch notes when he knocked on my door.
“May I come in?”
“Sure.” I answered in half-reality, half on my business. I really need to write these down because it’ll be only two weeks from now before our final exams.
He opened the door slowly and peeked at me. He smiled as he entered and closed the door.
“For finals?” He grabbed a chair and sat beside my study table.
“Yeah. I need to jot these down,” I sighed. “Two more pages and I’m done!”
“Oh. Good luck, though! I just thought of bugging you but I think you’re really busy so should I go out now?”
“No! It’s okay. I can do this even if you’re there. Go on, what’s up?”
“Nothing, really. I was just bored so I came in. We don’t have a basketball schedule today. I already finished my project and homeworks. Nothing to do, actually.” He sighed. “One month of no parents. It’s boring.”
“You still have me, though.” I chuckled.
He chuckled too. “You’re my only hope, I think.”
“Why don’t you hang out with your friends today?”
“Meh, they’re doing their projects. Duh, you expect them to do it after the teacher instructs us? You can’t count on them.” He laughed.
“Wow, so you’re telling me you’re a good boy?”
“I always am.”
I just smiled and didn’t reply so he just watched me write. He grabbed the first few pages of my scratch notes and read it.
“Man, I don’t want to encounter this. Mitosis..? Meiosis..? What even.”
“Unfortunately, you will. But that’s easy as pie.”
“I don’t know how to make pie. Haha.”
I just shook my head and smiled at his joke. I was in the middle of finishing my notes when I noticed he’s staring at me.
“What?” I smiled.
He looked away and his face reddened. “N-nothing..”
“Come on, tell me. There should be something wrong.” I put down my pen and checked him. When I tried to put my palm on his forehead, he looked the other way.
“Dongho, what’s wrong?”
“I said nothing.”
“No, there is something wrong.”
“You really want to know?”

Dongho
“You really want to know?”
He just nodded innocently.
I took a deep breath, grabbed his shirt and kissed him.
He remained emotionless when I kissed him. Even though I know he doesn’t like it, I still don’t want it to end. I was breathless but I don’t want to let go. Our lips touching each other, none of us dared to move. When I was becoming more breathless, my hand gripping his shirt moved to his waist and grasped to it. That’s when I tried to move my lips into another angle. To my shock, he followed me and moved his lips opposite of mine. He grabbed the back of my head and kissed me harder. He bit my lower lip and I gasped, causing me to open my mouth. Damn! Wrong move. I felt his hot tongue enter my mouth. He tasted every inch of it. I fought for dominance but my weakness took me away so quick and he won. His hands touched my back then signaled me to sit over his lap. Thanks to his swivel-type chair and I can do this. I knelt down to the sides’ spaces of his chair and sat over his lap without drifting away from him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and played with his hair. I wanted to continue but the loss of air is really getting into me. I pulled out and placed my face at the crook of his neck then breathed there hard.

We were both panting heavily. We both listened to the heavy breathing of each other. We both listened to the beating of our hearts. It sounds the same.

“Wow..” I whimpered under my breath.

He gave my neck short kisses and hugged me tight.

“Man.. I waited for this moment to come.” Shyly, he confessed.

I chuckled. “Same.”

“So…?”

“Yes.”

I broke the hug and gave him a sweet smile. “I like you,” I his cheeks. “I don’t know when did it start, but all I know is I like you.”

He smiled. “But what if Mom and Dad knew about this?”

“They wouldn’t know.” I assured him.

“How?”

“Don’t worry too much, we can make it all work without them knowing.”

He ruffled my hair. “I love you.”

I chuckled and stood up. I pulled him towards the bed. We both fell on it and he fell on top of me.

“Then show me.” I attacked his lips again.