“How did you not get that? I already told you a million times, George Orwell wrote ‘Animal Farm’, not ing Old McDonald.” Baekhyun says, patience running thin as his tutee continued to laugh like an idiot over his failed literature grade.

And so starts another day with Park Chanyeol.

***

                For Baekhyun, words are something he cherishes. They are easy to understand but at most times they turn very complex. But that’s what Baekhyun loves- the versatility of it all. So it was no surprise that when Baekhyun entered college, he majored in literature. Though he got questioned what the hell does a lit major do after college anyway?, he paid no heed to their taunts and, as cliché as it sounds, followed his heart.

He just did not expect following his heart would lead him to want to jump over a building that is preferably a hundred feet tall.

It starts innocently enough. His professor asks him if he was interested in tutoring a student that was failing miserably in his class. Baekhyun, thinking that it would look good in his resume, immediately agreed. And besides, it was literature, his forte. He’d be able to help this guy get a passing grade in no time. So, he meets Park Chanyeol.

It turns out, Chanyeol is a music student who laughs obnoxiously at every little thing and is the biggest pain in the known to man. Seriously, no exaggeration.

The first time they meet, Baekhyun tells Chanyeol that they should stay at Ace to get some studying done. It was Chanyeol’s first time in Ace and it. Was. Horrible.

“Woah, is that an alpaca? *Insert laugh*, that’s cute.”

“Hey there! Oh wow, those are some eyebrows. *Insert laugh*, just kidding. Please don’t hurt me.”

“Ace? Ace the alpaca? Nice one, *Insert laugh*.”

“Are all the staff here eerily good-looking? I should work here then! *Insert laugh*”

Baekhyun wanted to punch Park Chanyeol in his admittedly handsome face.

***

                No one deserved this torture. No one. So what the hell was Baekhyun doing fighting with Chanyeol why it was not okay for Paris to take Helen?

“Chanyeol, there was a ing war because of what he had done. I’m pretty sure that accounts for something, you retard.”

Chanyeol shakes his head, “No, no. You see, if Paris really liked this chick, he needed to make his move. And he did! I’m proud of my homey.”

Baekhyun resists the urge to smother Chanyeol with hollow bricks, “But Helen was taken! If Paris just ing kept it in his pants, the Trojan War would not have happened.”

“Yeah, but,” Chanyeol crosses his arms over his chest and says, “You know how people start becoming irrational because of love? Maybe that’s what happened. Maybe Paris got so consumed with so much love for Elena that there was nothing else he could do but take her away, y’know. Like, screw the rest of the world. I love you.” Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun, “So I’m going to take you away to be mine forever.”

Baekhyun, unable to control the rapid beating of his heart (must be from the adrenaline rush from debating with Chanyeol), glances at the clock above them, “I’ve got class in fifteen minutes, so we’ll end here. Great proposition, by the way.” Baekhyun hastily stands up and shoves his things quickly into his backpack, “You should really apply that kind of thinking during the essay part of your exams. So, yeah, bye.”

Baekhyun rushes out of Ace, not knowing why he is unable to breathe properly. He also forgets to tell the dumb , it’s Helen, not Elena.

***

“So, you like this, this ‘dumb ’?” Tao asks Baekhyun, who was currently hugging Ace as if there was no tomorrow.

“I’m not sure. This guy? He’s not exactly the smart type, hence the title ‘dumb ’, but at that moment, when he looked at me and uttered those magical words, it was like I wanted to drown in his gaze forever.” Baekhyun lets out a deep sigh and releases Ace from his hold, “I’m turning sappy, darn it. Why the hell are feelings so complicated?”

Tao nods sympathetically. He goes over to his disheartened friend and hugs him. (Because his grandma said hugs cure everything.) What he didn’t expect though, was to be shoved unceremoniously to the floor.

“Hey, dude, not cool. Is this guy bothering you, Baekhyun?” Chanyeol says, looming over Tao scarily.

“Tao!” Baekhyun quickly rushes to his friend and helps him get up, “You okay?” When Tao nods unsurely, Baekhyun turns to Chanyeol to glare at him, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Chanyeol shrugs, “Sorry, I thought he was molesting you or something. That was a pretty tight hug.” He turns to Tao and gives him a smile, “Real sorry.”

“You better be.” Someone mumbles from behind Chanyeol. Chanyeol turns around and all of them are surprised to see Kris, looking more pissed than usual, “If you hurt Zitao, I’ll make sure to return the favor triple fold.”

Chanyeol laughs nervously, knowing Kris was serious with his threat, “Yeah, I’m really sorry. I was just looking out for the little guy.” Chanyeol says, gesturing to Baekhyun who stood agape beside a severely confused-looking Tao.

“Whatever.” Kris takes Tao by his elbow and leads him to the back room where only employees were allowed.

Baekhyun looks menacingly at Chanyeol, “What was that all about?”

Chanyeol simply smiles playfully and says, “Just looking out for you, my damsel-in-distress.”

***

                So Baekhyun’s not 100% sure about this and he doesn’t want to get his hopes up, but he thinks Chanyeol may have a jealous streak in him. The incident with Tao was just evidence number one.

 Number two came when Baekhyun casually comments how he thought the university’s resident troublemaker, Kim Jongin, was really hot. Chanyeol shrugs and tells him, “Jongin? I used to work with him part time as a model. Had the most horrible attitude, I swear.” Chanyeol then proceeds to badmouth Jongin in every way possible, even going as far as saying “Jongin used to take dumps and not flush because he wanted to see the reaction of the next person to use the toilet. It’s true, he told me!”

Number three happens with Tao again. He was just innocently cooing over the Chinese’s eye bags when all of a sudden, Chanyeol starts flailing and asking Baekhyun to come help with his Fem Lit homework. Baekhyun doesn’t miss the glare Chanyeol sends Tao as he pours over Chanyeol’s work, and he kind of wishes the butterflies in his stomach to stop fluttering so damn much.

Because how is he supposed to teach Chanyeol properly if all those ing butterflies make him want to kiss the dumb senseless?

***

Kris stops furiously wiping the counter to give Baekhyun the look. “Byun, I’d appreciate it if you stop suffocating Ace and my waiter, damn you.”

Baekhyun loosens his hold on Ace and Tao to stick his tongue out at the pissed-off barista, “You’re just jealous, Kris, that I get to cuddle Tao.”

Tao smiles at the scowling Kris and tells the latter something in Chinese. Kris’ face immediately softens and he answers Tao in Korean, “You’re lucky I like you.”, then turns to leave.  Baekhyun mischievously grins at the action and stage-whispers, “So whipped.”

Tao nudges Baekhyun and says, “Don’t be like that Baekhyun. Wufan and I are just friends.”

“Just friends?” Baekhyun shakes his head, “Friends don’t get jealous like that.”

The Chinese boy tilts his head and asks innocently, “Like what?”

Baekhyun shrugs, “Like…like they want to cut the head off of anyone who’s in the vicinity of the person they like.”

Tao’s eyes widen comically, “Head…off?”

“Yeah!” Baekhyun says enthusiastically, “And it’s so obvious Kris wants you. He mentally undresses you with his eyes, you know. Every ing time. ‘Just friends’ don’t do that.”

“Un-dress?”

“Mhm. And Kris- well, you know how he’s so scary all the time?                Well, he becomes different when he’s with you.”

Tao frowns as he scratches his cheek, “Different?”

Baekhyun nods, “Yep. Kris-“

“Baekhyun! Byun Baekhyun!”

Baekhyun cranes his neck to find Chanyeol waving at him from the café entrance, stacks of books dangerously held in one hand. Baekhyun waves back and pats Tao’s shoulder, “Well, you get the point, don’t you Zitao? Anyways, gotta fly.”

Before Baekhyun could rush to Chanyeol (the dumb had texted him that he got an F for an essay and needed Baekhyun’s help. Baekhyun likes to think the only reason he feels giddy that he’s meeting the giant was because he wanted to laugh at Park Chanyeol’s face. Really.), Tao grabs him by the arm. Baekhyun looks back at Tao, surprised, “What? What is it?”

“Baekhyun. If anything you said was true-“

“Baekhyuuuun. These books are heavy, hurry up!” Chanyeol bellows, books already falling from his grasp.

Baekhyun looks at Tao apologetically, “Tao, I really need to go. Chanyeol-”

Instead, Tao tightens his hold and says, “-then you and Chanyeol? You’re not ‘just friends’, Baekhyun. Trust me. You two are anything but.”

***

                Baekhyun looks at Ace forlornly, because that damn smile in the stupid stuffed toy’s face is so ing adorable it looks just like that of Chanyeol’s. It may not seem like it, but that was a huge compliment.

Baekhyun lets out a deep sigh and resumes to drink his coffee as if it was water. He doesn’t know how he becomes like this, a guy drowning his sorrows and woes of the heart away with a bitter beverage, but he definitely knows why.

It was all because of Park ing Chanyeol.

When Tao wanders over to his table he glares at the waiter who is smiling at him smugly, “Stay away from me, you evil being. This is your fault for putting thoughts in my head.”

Tao only beams brighter as he places a slice of chocolate cake at Baekhyun’s table, “Please don’t blame me. I was just stating facts. I didn’t know you’d act all weird around him after that.”

Weird would be an understatement. After Tao had so kindly proclaimed that he and Chanyeol had-had- something between them, Baekhyun started to become oh-so-conscious and reflective.

Like, when was it okay for Chanyeol to just casually sling his arm around Baekhyun? How did it happen that the two of them could just share the same fork and not be grossed out by the other’s slobber? When did Baekhyun find Chanyeol’s laugh not annoying anymore, but, oh dear god, melodious? And, more importantly, what the possessed him to fall in love with the guy who thought Hemingway was a rock star? For now, he uses Tao as a scapegoat for his love problems.

“I hate you.” Baekhyun declares, “This cake better be on the house for the misery you have caused me.”

Tao scoots over to Baekhyun, now with Ace in hand. He s the alpaca to the downcast boy and smiles, “Baekhyun, if it’s any consolation, I was scolded by Wufan for meddling in your affairs. So now I need to put in extra time in the café.” Tao pats Ace’s head and continues, “But this little guy will be with you, ‘kay? Take care of him or boss will have my head!”

Baekhyun nods and waves goodbye at Tao’s retreating back. He looks at Ace and grimaces, “Stop looking at me like that. Stop smiling. Stop reminding me of Chanyeol and the fact that I am in love with him!”

Ace only looks back at Baekhyun. (Silently judging him, the Lit major bets.)

***

                Who knows how he ended up like this, but hey, it’s a free country, Baekhyun thinks as he kept on punching Ace’s face, trying to erase the alpaca’s frozen, bright smile.

“Damn you Park Chanyeol!” Another hit. “Stop making fun of ee s’ last name!”

Slap. “You think Kafka’s boring?”  A punch to the gut. “He is some serious , I’ll have you know!”

“By the way, that eye twitch you have when you laugh?” Double-hit to the noggin. “Adorable!”

A tight squeeze. “And the way you stare intently at your notes?” A really tight squeeze. “Really hot!”

Baekhyun lets Ace go for a moment, “You want to know something else, you dumb ?” Baekhyun raises Ace up high in the air and forcefully flings him to the ground all the while shouting, “I wanna be your boyfriend!”

The sound of clapping makes Baekhyun blush and he hastily turns around.  Holy Mona Lisa, the love of his life was ing standing there all along.

How could Baekhyun have forgotten?! They were scheduled to meet so Chanyeol would know how to dissect the works of the Bronte sisters.

Baekhyun oh-so-wishes to the gods that any moment now Chanyeol is going to grow another head so he’d be assured this was just some kind of psycho dream that even Freud himself would not be able to analyze.

Unfortunately, Chanyeol just continued to clap energetically, a huge smile adorning his face. Okay, not the reaction Baekhyun was expecting, crazy dream or not.

“What? Cha-Chanyeol, I-“

“I knew you had a flair for the theatrics, Baekhyun, but that was something else!” Chanyeol starts laughing as he places a hand to his chest, “Whew, wow, I’m really relieved we’re on the same page. I thought for sure you had a thing for the waiter.”

Chanyeol picks up Ace from the floor and holds it out to Baekhyun, “Okay, my turn. Hey there. I guess I’ll just say it as it is: the dumb would really want you to be his boyfriend, as well.”

 Chanyeol sways Ace from side-to-side, “Whaddya say? He finally got that B in literature that he wanted. Because the dumb wanted to make his cute tutor proud and maybe, finally, get the princess?”

 Chanyeol lowers Ace and whispers mock conspiratorially, “That’s you Byun Baekhyun, by the way. The princess, I mean.”

Baekhyun bites his bottom lip to refrain himself from screaming ‘I LOVE YOU’. Instead, he pushes Ace away from Chanyeol’s hold and jumps into his arms a la ‘Gone with the Wind’.

Byun Baekhyun is a Literature major because he loves words. But ironically, he doesn’t think they are enough to express how he feels right now as Chanyeol hugs him tight.

***

Baekhyun shrieks when he sees Chanyeol’s essay marked with a big, beautiful letter ‘A’ on the upper right corner, “You did it! After those cold, hard months of tutoring you, you finally got an ‘A’!”

“Hey, you make it sound like it was torture for you!” Chanyeol fails to hide his smile as Baekhyun starts kissing his paper, warmth growing on his chest as he thinks, I love this boy.

Baekhyun suddenly stands up straighter, “You know what, I’m going to give you a reward.”

“Reward? I like the sound of that.” Chanyeol smirks when his mind is suddenly invaded with a picture of a Baekhyun under him, “Does it involve anything like last night?”

Baekhyun places his hand on Chanyeol’s thigh and squeezes, “Maaaaaaaaybe.”

The two of them lean forward slowly, their lips only an inch apart from each other. Finally-

“Baekhyun!” Tao screeches, making the couple pull away. Baekhyun glares at Chanyeol when the latter mumbles, “ing blocker.”

“Yeah? What’s wrong?”

“Baekhyun, it’s horrible!” Tao practically screams, “Ace is missing! He’s gone!”

***

                Kim Jongin gives the stuffed alpaca a bored look, its beady eyes seemingly pleading to him, asking him to let it go unharmed.

Jongin just scoffs and tells Ace (never mind that Sehun’s looking at him like he’s crazy), “Not yet, you crappy piece of cotton. I’m not done with you yet.”