Lu han's regrets.

Listen to this while reading.

I patiently and nervously pray on the chapel as I wait for the doctor to come out and call me, everything is critical. I was the only ‘family’ left, she has nowhere to go, no one to wipe her tears away. She was… perfectly lonely.

I pressed my hands on my face preventing myself not to cry, I was really wrong for what I have done back then.

“We know each other back then, don’t we?” she said, looking at me. I don’t know if I will be glad that she knows I’m from somewhere or be disappointed with myself because I was the one who changed her. “You don’t know me?”

“You know me?” my face lit up a little, I heard her sigh.

“Lu han.” She said without any tone.

I awkwardly let out a short chuckle and she looked at me, without any expression plastered on her face. “How are you now, min?”

“I’m fine.” She continued to flip the pages of the magazine. “So, you are my new secretary.”

“It’s nice meeting you … again, lu han.” She stood up grabbing her things with her and a car suddenly stopped in front of the coffee shop, “take care of these.”

My eyes widened, “What? I don’t know how to do this? Mind to explain.”

“It’s your problem now, find a solution to it and oh, I still have a meeting with Mr. Maeda at one thirty. Take note of that.” She walked out from the shop and I was left speechless.

What have I done?

Ten minutes later, I received a call from the office that min’s car got into an accident. I left the coffee shop and the papers on the table telling the waiter that I’ll be back, I quickly hailed a cab and went to the hospital.

“Don’t die, min… please” I kept on chanting.

-

I continued to cry when a hand patted my shoulder, I saw my older brother. “Lu han.” He started, “Let’s makes things right again.” Suddenly a doctor came, he was smiling at us. I immediately stood up from kneeling and quickly ran to him.

“Is she okay doctor han?!”

“She’s now perfectly fine, she needs to rest for a while…” he said, smiling. “… but when she wakes up, be sure to call me immediately because we also think she’ll suffer amnesia after the accident.”

“Doc, if ever she’ll suffer from amnesia will her old memories will come back?”

“For now, we still don’t know if it’s just a mild or severe one.” He sighed, looking at us. “Just keep in mind that when she wakes up call me.”
 

For the past of two nights, I was sitting beside her while I held her hand. “You know what, when you we were young…” I muttered as she sleeps. “… You were really crazy over me…” I chuckled as I remember, “… even though I call you such hurtful words.” I continued to mutter as my tears started to fall again.

I continued to cry as my heart hurts so much because I never knew the one whom I hurt several times, is the one who will make me cry like this.

“Hi!!” she beamed, waving at me. “I’m your new seatmate! My name is min!!”

I rolled my eyes, “whatever.” I turn around and talked to my best friend to avoid her but she tapped my shoulder, “What??!” I scoffed.

“Are you not in the mood right now? Hm~ I understand but let’s be friends okay?”

I faked smile at her and quickly turned around.

“… I was really a fool back then…”

“Aishh. Lu han help me with this problem, I don’t really get it!” she pouted at me and I was really disgusted. “Please?”

“What? This??” I pointed out, she nodded. “Are you born dumb?? It’s easy…. Tch, dumb min.”

She continued to nag me as I ignore her. “Please luhan, Okay I’m dumb but… I just want to pass the exam.”

“Will you shut up?! It’s your problem now! Find a solution to it!” I angrily said to her, but she gave me a small smile.

“I- I’m sorry, I will just do it by myself.”

I wiped my tears as I trace her face, I was mesmerized with her pink lips and her eyes beautifully closed. “I still like the old you… even though I called you fat and ugly...” I smiled to myself. “… you were more beautiful back then.”

It’s been a hell to me when I found out min likes me, well… to be honest; the whole class knew it before me. people kept on teasing us, I was really getting more irritated with her I don’t know what to do, I hope today I won’t get a bad day again because today is my birthday.

I sighed as I entered the classroom, when someone stopped and gave a gift to me. it was min.

“It’s for you; I bought it with all the money I saved in my allowance.” She widely smiled at me.

I slowly took the gift and placed my things on my desk, everyone teased me badly. The first two classes were very irritating that I literally want to punch everyone, especially her. Suddenly, the bell rang and I quickly exited the room and went to the boys comfort room.

“Yah, lu han.” My friend, tao chuckled. “How’s your princess?”

“Princess?” I bitterly chuckled. “… she’s ing ugly and fat, look at her, will ever a guy like a girl like her?”

Kris playfully punched me, “too bad she likes you.” and they all laughed.

“Geez, I really loathe her.” I washed my hands, “When I get home, I’ll burn or throw her gift away. I don’t care if she bought it with her allowance.”

“woah, chill man. Why don’t you just give it back to her?” lay asked; I turned to them and wiped my hands. “My sister is her friend, Mei insisted me not to give her back… it will just hurt her feelings.”

“So? You hate her right?” Kris was right, everyone agreed.

“I’ll just burn it secretly” I plainly said, “Mei will be upset, she’s my sister.”

As we laughed while exiting the comfort room, we saw min running back to the classroom. We looked at each other and suspected that she heard everything.

“… I’m sorry.” I cried again, squeezing her hand when I saw her other hand twitched, I looked up and saw her eyes slowly opened, min looked at me with a questionable look. “Who … are you?” she asked. “Where am I?” I smiled at her and told her to wait; I quickly dialed the doctor’s number, telling him that min finally woke up. I smiled as I put down the telephone and turned my back to her.

“Who are you?” she asked once again.

I sat down beside her and held her hand once again, “I’ll makes things right.”

“W-what do you me-“suddenly the doctor came with a nurse on his side, he was smiling widely.

“How are you now?” he asked min, but she was very confused.

“I don’t really know, I feel really tired and nothing else.” She gave him a small smile.

“Oh? That’s good.” He said, “May I ask something?”

She nodded.

“Do you remember anything?”

I looked at her as she lowered her head down, there was no verbal respond but she slowly shook her head. Doctor Han and I looked at each other, “Can I talk to you outside?” he said. We both talked outside as the nurse assist min in the bandages. Doctor Han explained that they need to conduct more examination to min in order to find out if her memory will return back or she need to go back from the start again.

“… and It’s up to you.” he said.

“What do you mean it’s up to me?”

“It’s up to you if you will help her if ever she will start all over again.”

I looked down, “If it that’s the only thing that will bring the old min back, I will be with her forever.”

-

It’s been two weeks since she woke up and Doctor Han is still comparing the results from the examinations they’ve done for the past weeks. Slowly, I enter the room revealing her in her usual hospital gown. Her head was resting on her knees and she looked at me when I opened the door.

“Hi.” I pursed my lips, “Did you eat? I brought some fruits.”

She shook her head.

To be honest, it’s hard to right now when the corporation she’s been handling for the past two years is getting more and more complicated, they have to vote for another CEO will handle them first because of min’s condition. I have to balance my work, family and taking care of her because this is the time she needs a family who will take care of her.

“Orange?”

She opened like a kid, “ahh~~” I put the piece of orange on then she chuckled.

A sudden nostalgia hit me when I saw her smile like that.

“What’s wrong, lu han?” she curiously asked me as she waved her hand near my face. “Are you fine?”

I chuckled and nodded, “I’m very fine, say ‘ahh’ again.”I grinned and then the oranges fell on the ground, we both looked at each other and laughed.

“Knock knock?” Doctor Han came with a brown envelope on his hand. “Good news to you Lu Han.” I raised an eyebrow and took the envelope and opened it.

“She has a traumatic amnesia it’s a memory loss caused by a hard blow to the head. People who lose their memory as the result of a car accident may have traumatic amnesia. People with traumatic amnesia may experience a brief loss of consciousness, or even go into a coma. In the majority of cases the amnesia is temporary - how long it lasts usually depends on how severe the injury is. I’m very glad that she didn’t go on coma for too long, her body is surprisingly strong than I thought.” He explained. “Her memory will recover in no time but it will take quite long.”

I nodded and closed the envelope, taking glimpse on her while she eats. “I’m glad to hear that doctor, I’m really happy to know she’s getting fine.”

-

It’s been a week since min was discharged from the hospital, I took her to her house and she was, not surprisingly, impressed because I explained to her she designed this house, I also told her how she’s very dedicated to her work.

“Really?” she smiled, “I’m very hard working??”

“Yep, you were.” I nodded and suddenly my phone rang, “oh, wait. I got a phone call.”

“hello?”

“Lu han, are you really sure with that decision?” my sister asked me over the line. “I mean, she might remember what you’ve done to her.”

I bit my lip and lowered my head.

“I don’t care, I want to make things right.”

“But-“

I sighed, “I will do whatever it takes just to prove to her that I’m ready to steal her heart again.” I glance over her, “… don’t worry Fei.” I hung up and went back to her, she was holding the empty thick notebook that I brought along.

“What is this?” she curiously asked.

“That will be our diary.” I said smiling at her. “our diary?”

I nodded, “You may temporarily lost those old memories, I’m going to make sure to help you make new memories.”

Min looked at me and smiled, “Lu Han, I don’t know who you are really to me in the past, but I want to thank you for being with me, for taking care of me, I really do.” She scooted closer and gave me a hug, a warm hug that takes all my regrets away. “I don’t really know who you are, but you make me happy.”

to be continued.

___

behind this fanfic, is a man I still love until now.

the flashbacks are real, that happened to me.

I fell in love with a man who didn't love me back, it was 3 years ago.

What I have wrote was all in my expectations (except for the flashbacks), I want him to just... you know, realize that he needs me and he changed me alot

I was hurt with his words but despite all the hurt, I finally realized just a few days ago that I still love him

I still care

no man can ever replace him in my heart

I don't know why.

let's say he's my inspiration in all of my oneshots.

all the pain that I felt, I put into words.

IF U KNOW WHO HE IS. SHUT UP AHHAHAHAH!

and about the gift, ahhahahah i wont tell it. ahahahhaha

it's so embarrassing.

DRAMA ON ITECH! AHAHAHAHA

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