“I’m trying to reach you can’t you see my hands? Take them please, and don’t ever let go.  For the cold night won’t stop, whispering about an endless lullaby. “

 

Noona – a term used by a boy to address an older girl.

 

 

START:

It never occurred to me.

That one day I’d see myself missing Lee Seunghyun’s very presence.

It all came back to me like the cool breeze that enveloped me towards the night.

All memories of him that I’d tried and tried numerous of times but failed to stay hidden in that treasured chest locked far away to never be opened again. But, I forgot to throw away the key.  And before I could keep myself, from looking back, the contents had already started to spill. The glass shielding me from insanity had inevitably shattered and now it’s too late.

 

“noona..noona!” It didn’t matter where we were he’d always yell for me amidst the crowd as if I wasn’t already right beside him, as if I would leave his side. If only it was that easy.

“noona, don’t leave me.” Lee Seunghyun always the drama queen had his eyes wide open in fear with his lips trembling while he tugged onto the ends of my shirt.  I rolled my eyes at his childish act. I won’t leave you big baby, I was just going to get some drinks. I’d told him to stay where he was while I went over to the refreshments table. When I came back, the idiot had already been too occupied chatting with a lot of girls that surrounded him to notice me. What happened to don’t leave me?

 

Funny how you’d never really appreciated someone until they leave you. 

Noona, don’t leave me.

I didn’t but you did.

I stopped abruptly and kicked the air. Everything was still, for a moment, as I looked at the dark sky, the moon, it’s presence I’d never kept in touch but was always there, staring down at the lost girl standing alone on the side pavement. 

 

“noona why was that guy with you?” Seunghyun suddenly blurted out while we were walking side by side at the park. Which guy? Oh, the cute ice cream guy.

“He just wanted to ask me something…”

I shrugged it off.

“I don’t like it…when you’re with another man.” I raised my eyebrow at the word ‘man’. Seunghyun had stopped walking and was staring off at a couple of kids playing around. His voice had suddenly changed letting out an unfamiliar aura around him. His lips pouted while his eyes flickered to me.  I tried to keep my amusement hidden. Someone’s being a little possessive.

“aww..don’t be jealous.”  I pinched both of his cheeks making him face me.

 

A heartless laugh echoed through my thoughts like a familiar melody aching to be played for the first time.  Broken from my trance, I felt a chill ride up my spine, as I continued on walking without a destination.  I could still hear the rich voice laughing softly, tickling my ears, until it rose and filled the night air. Seunghyun never laughed like that. So why did it sound just like him?

“noona” it whispered

“do it noona..” the voice urged me.

STOP.

STOP IT.

I stooped down and held my head onto my arms, protecting myself from the darkness that had engulfed me.

 

Images flooded my mind continuously. I shook my head, if only to drive them out from reaching me.   

“noona..it’s okay..just do it.”  Seunghyun looked at me with pleading eyes. His facial expression and body was contradicting his own self. Both of his fists clenched and unclenched as he tried to keep, the remaining ones, of his self-control.

I was terrified. From the way he looked at me. His eyes had never showed me that kind of emotion before. Now, his hunger was evident.

I stared at him dumbfounded by the turn of events. He took a step towards me. Everything shifted. And I saw both his and my own self. 

“noona..please.” 

I held out the knife that was once in his hands just a few seconds ago, I pointed it to him with trembling hands.

Seunghyun. What’s happening?

“yes..” his voice let out an unfamiliar laugh that brought me  goose bumps. Seunghyun.

No.

My Seunghyun was gone.

This person gazing at me filled with hunger and hatred slowly pushed aside the knife in my hands. This was no longer the Seunghyun I knew.  I let out a whimper. I felt my own tears caress my face as I the knife forward seconds before he could touch me.

Then everything out.

“s-seunghyun..Seunghyun..”  I choked out.  I was sitting on my legs as tears flowed down my face.

And I saw him.

With his eyes, just like how I always remembered him, innocent and intense, void out of anything dark, eyes that stared right through me, right now.

I immediately ran towards him, towards Seunghyun who was lying on the cold concrete ground a puddle of wine blood surrounding him.

His eyes closed right after I reached him. I was too late. One swift movement and I held his lifeless body to me. The familiar warmness that usually emitted from his body was long gone.

“No! NO! SEUNGHYUN COME BACK!” I rocked myself with his body carefully cradling his head with my hands. Wake up. Seunghyun, please wake up.

And just like that he disappeared, vanishing out of thin air.

Horrified I stared at my hands. They were stained with a rich color of blood.

They burned.