Alex’s POV (OC)

Yes, I’m really contented with this. Staring at his smiles, locking gazes with him, stalking him on Twitter. I’m contented from watching Kris from afar.

But… one day, he posted something on Twitter

|Are you adventurous? You want to go with me on an adventure trip? Reply if yes. I’ll consider the first one|

I quickly smashed typed on my keyboard |me|

I waited for his reply… |Ok. Alex, starting tomorrow, you’ll go out with me.|

And I just can’t believe that he followed me and he is commanding me to go out with him

We talked about the adventure trip, omo~ We just exchanged numbers! I thought he just gives his number to those he trusts….it means… he trusts me?! O///O

 

The next day, we met at the café he mentioned and he let me ride on his car. I’m on the car next to the driver’s seat and he’s the one driving

What a wonderful place. I inhaled fresh air with closed eyes as I walked.

“Ahh!” Kris held my body before I fall to the water

“Hey, what are you doing? Eyes on your way”

He walked in front of me to lead the way

This is my chance, in this trip, I will make him fall for me

“First to try” he pointed the airplane “Skydiving” he grinned

I felt my heart beat fast and my knees started to get weak. My lips began to shiver.

“Why are you just standing there? Leggo!” he held my wrist and pulled me and waited for the airplane to land

“W-Wait, you have fear of heights, right?”

“Who cares?”

Since I was frozen in my place, he just carried me inside the plane

We wear our safety harnesses and other paraphernalia needed

Actually, I have fear of heights ;A;

“Aja!” I closed my eyes as I followed Kris the moment he jumped out of the plane

He’s screaming so hard that I know it may break his vocal cords

“CALM DOWN, KRIS!” even if I’m the one who’s scared, I have the guts to tell him to calm down

He shut his mouth up.

“Do I look gay awhile ago?” he asked while removing his harness

“Aniya. You’re still handsome” I blushed a little on what I said

He just shook  his head and ruffled my hair

**

“Second one, before we sleep… let’s stay awake and witness darkness”

“Ah… It’s ok” darkness is not a big threat for me, actually

We stayed like that, silence enveloping us. We’re so close to each other that I can feel his sweat. “Hey, I can feel that you’re afraid, we can open the lights if you want”

“NO. Let’s stay like this and wait until the sun comes out”

“O-Okay”

**

“Yah! Third one! Rock climbing!”

Aish! My fear of heights ;A;

I know that he also have that but he’s trying to be strong

We started to climb and oh my, I SLIPPED

“WAAH!!!” I felt a muscular arm surrounding me

I felt safe because I know that it’s Kris’

I took a deep breath before going back on climbing “Gamsa” I murmured, enough for him to hear

He smiled and we continued our mission, to reach the top

**

He looked around

“And the fourth one is… that!” he pointed a lion

“Huh?”

“We’ll kill that lion”

“Yah! Are you out of your mind?”

“Maybe.”

I don’t know why in this place, they allow people to kill lions -_- That’s brutal

He handed me the bow and arrow. He set his hands on what he’s holding and targeted the lion

“On three, hit the lion” he whispered while we’re hiding under the bushes. I don’t have any option but to nod

“O-one. T-Two. T-Three” I let go of the arrow and looked at him as he released the arrow with closed eyes

Both of our arrows hit the lion

“This couple is great. First one to kill a lion”

“We’re not a couple” I commented.. but deep inside, I’m flattered

He just smiled at me

**

“I think this would be the last one”

“What is it?”

He looked to the pool, wave pool to be exact beside us

“You can’t swim, right?”

“Now, I’m starting to suspect, are you my stalker?”

“A-Anie!”

“You seem to know many things about me. But anyway, we just need to jump there. 6 feet!”

“Are you trying to kill yourself?”

“No. I just want to do weird things”

After that statement, he jumped on the pool. There’s no lifeguards here!

I also jumped on the pool. I saw him with eyes closed and it seemed that he’s not breathing

My eyes widened as I shook him hardly. He opened his eyes and gave me a thumbs up

He started to move his feet and arms… H-He’s swimming!”

I followed him until he reached the end of the pool

He got up first then he lifted me up

“You’re so great, Kris” I tapped his shoulders lightly even if he’s too damn tall

“Thank you for everything” he said and took a quick peck on my lips O///O

My eyes are so wide that he flicked my forehead for me to be back in reality

“It’s a thank you kiss, ok?”

I nodded quickly even if I was quite disappointed

Oh well, at least he pecked my lips.

I walked to the beach shore and sat there and watched as the sun set

“How pretty”

“Just like you” someone suddenly said

When I turned around, I saw Kris behind me

He flashed a sweet smile and sat beside me

“Do you wanna know why I’m doing all of this?” he suddenly asked, out of the blue

“Neh”

“I’m under a process called ‘Overcoming your fears’.”

“Is it already finished?”

“Not yet. I’m still not over of my two greatest fears”

“What is it?”

“Loving someone and leaving someone”

“It would be easy”

“Not as you think. I don’t know what love is. Please tell me what is love” he threw a stone to the water

“Hmm.. To my definition… love is a sudden feeling, special feeling you felt towards a person. And you can confirm that it is love when you can think of the future with him/her”

“Then, I’m already over of the fear of loving someone… because awhile ago, I just admitted to myself that I love her”

“It means that leaving someone is the last one”

“Yep. And I don’t know how to tell that girl that I’m already leaving her”

I swallowed hard. From the very start, I know that he won’t love me. I shouldn’t assume that by the end of this adventure trip, I and Kris will be happily ever after

 “And you know what, I can’t even admit to her that she’s the one I love”

“You should admit it, Kris” I held his hand

“Maybe not” he removed his hand from me.

“I-I guess I should go to sleep, you too. We’re living tomorrow” he said

“N-Neh”

I followed him inside the rest house and went directly to my room.

Tears flowing while packing my things

“I shouldn't have followed him on this trip because it just caused me to fall for him deeper and my heart to break” I dived to my bed and buried my head to my pillow

“Kris… Just tell me that you love me and everything will be alright”

I sighed. “Why would he tell me that he love me if he doesn’t?” I tried to laugh it out but I just look stupid, I know

**

We’re so quiet on the airplane. We didn’t dare to speak. I told my friends to fetch me while he asked his family to fetch him

But before we could get out of the airplane, he said something “Wait for me on the arrival area”

I just looked at him, questioning him.

I already saw my friends on the arrival room… I also saw his parents, I bet they didn’t know me.

“Alex!” my friends hugged me the moment they saw me

“We missed you”

“Yeah!! So much!”

“Uhh.. Excuse me… Ms. Alex, where’s our son?”

So I was wrong, they know me

But before I could speak, they ran… I think they ran to Kris

I looked at him and he saw me looking at him so I looked away

I was about to turn away but then he held my wrist

“Here” he handed me a letter

“Don’t read it yet. Read it when you’re at home”

“Okay”

My friends teased me. They know that he’s my crush since the day that I studied on our school.

**********

When my friends left the house, I decided to read the letter

 

Dear Alex,

“Before I bid goodbye, I want to experience things I thought I’d never do

There’s only one on the list but it is composed of many things

ALL I WANT TO DO IS:

To overcome all of my fears…”

 

Ayo-wassup! I really had a good time with you during our adventure trip. Overcoming my fears was really good, but it isn’t over, remember? I’m not numb, I know that you’re admiring me for so long and I wasn’t surprised to see you that you replied first on my tweet. You know from the very start that I hate the word ‘love’, right? It’s never on my dictionary and because I’m so clueless about it, I still need to ask you what it is all about. You know what? I love her so much, I really do. Tell me… how could I tell her that? How could I tell you that I love you so much and I’m such a coward for not telling you? But I don’t want to hurt you… but I think I just caused too much damage to your heart. When I leave, your heart will be ready to love someone again. But remember this, JEONGMAL SARANGHAE, ALEX-AH <3

 

-Kris

 

Before he bids goodbye? What does he mean by that? I looked at the envelope. There’s something written on it

“3.28.13. Goodbye. I’m accepting death”

Eh? G-Goodbye? D-Death? Yah! Kris! Are you kidding me?! This ain’t a good joke!

I immediately dialed his number and waited for someone to pick it up

Someone picked it up on… I think 8^th ring.

“Yoboseyo?”  it’s his mother

“Uh… Ahmuni, can I talk to Kris?”

“O-Oh. K-Kris.” I heard her sob

“He just died. A second before I picked up the phone” she continued

 I covered my mouth and my knees fell to the ground. I hung up.

**flashback**

“Not as you think. I don’t know what love is. Please tell me what is love” he threw a stone to the water

“Hmm.. To my definition… love is a sudden feeling, special feeling you felt towards a person. And you can confirm that it is love when you can think of the future with him/her”

“Then, I’m already over of the fear of loving someone… because awhile ago, I just admitted to myself that I love her”

**end**

“It’s me. He’s talking about me and he just didn’t tell me that I’m the one he loves. Wae?? *sobs*”

**flashback**

“It means that leaving someone is the last one”

“Yep. And I don’t know how to tell that girl that I’m already leaving her”

**end**

“Babo! *sobs* Why didn’t you tell me that you’re dying?! I could’ve *sobs* cherished every moment with you, then. I’ll surely make you *sobs* happy.”

**flashback**

“And you know what? I can’t even admit to her that she’s the one I love”

**

“Why didn’t you confirm to me that it’s me you’re talking about?! *sobs* We could’ve spent the last hours of your life together, as a *sobs* couple.”

************

I woke up. It’s a nightmare! What the hell is that? Kris died? You kidding me?

I saw the letter he left me. It’s not yet opened. I felt nervous and cold sweat ran out of my body

 

Dear Alex,

“Before I bid goodbye, I want to experience things I thought I’d never do

There’s only one on the list but it is composed of many things

ALL I WANT TO DO IS:

To overcome all of my fears…”

Ayo-wassup! Thank you for coming with me on my adventure trip! As I said, I’m on the process of ‘Overcoming My Fears’. I’m already over it. Leaving someone…. I guess I just can’t do that. I shouldn’t fear of leaving this girl I said I love if I really won’t leave her, right? I left something, I left my heart on that girl. That girl is the one that made me know what the meaning of love is. She said that: Love is a sudden feeling, special feeling you felt towards a person. And you can confirm that it is love when you can think of the future with him/her. I know that you completely know the girl I’m talking about. Make her go out with me AGAIN on the café that served as our meeting place before going to the trip.

 

If on my dream, I cried because Kris died, in reality, I cried because of overflowing joy. All along, it’s really me he’s talking about. My dream is right, then. Except the part that Kris died. I looked at the envelope

|3.28.13. Café. 8pm. Meet me AGAIN|

I smiled. Oh Kris, you don’t know how happy I am right now.

I went to that café, not bothering to change my clothes. I know that whatever I wear, if he really loves me, he’ll say I’m pretty, no matter what

He opened the door for me. I can’t help it anymore, I kissed him the moment he held my hand. I don’t care whatever they say.

“Kris, we think you don’t need us anymore. He already answered you even you didn’t ask her”- Tao

We laughed

“Kris, I love you so much. Don’t you dare leave me, ok?”

“Of course, Alex. I’d never leave you because I love you so much, more than tongue can tell”

**END**