Just This One Time
Description
You will not like to read her life like a book. It will make you feel uncomfortable as it is gross.
She dislike fantasy, it shows how human is stupid enough to fantasize while in real life, there's no such thing. There's no fantasy or fairy tales in her life.
She dislikes happy song, happy film, happy story or even smiles. It is so fake for her. It hurts her every time she need to force herself to like those thing. 'It is nothing, right? I just need to like it, it's nothing big.' That's what she thought. It doesn't matter to her. She has a few happy moment but she recalls sad moment more. There's no happiness in her dictionary. She can't define happy.
She dislike forever. There's nothing which last forever. Best friend forever? No. That will not appear in her dictionary anymore. It was deleted long time ago. Love? No. She never fall in love because of several reasons. Family? If only there's no idiot who destroy the family, she would be grateful to be able to lean on them. She has no one to lean to.
Most importantly, she wonders why she is in this world. She feels that she is not worth to be in this world. Why is she a human? Why is she doing things she dislike? Why she has to be in this world?
Sometimes, she hopes she is a pet so that she can just sleep, eat and fool around. No need to worry about what she should wear or eat everyday. If only it is possible. She rethink the whole thing. Let's not fantasize since she hates that. She just hopes that she has a simple life.
If only the world is that simple, she won't walk that path.
Before anyone can hurt her, she hurts herself first, so that she can be used of it.
'Just this one time, the last time.' She lied.
Foreword
I think a lot before I decided that I should write this out. This is not based on true story, incase you are suspicious of where I get inspired.
The thought is somewhat true...
Just subsribe and read it! I did put a lot of efforts like reading the reference book to look up some vocab.
I don't guarantee I will update often but I will try my best.
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