Does "It" Finally Come?
The Courage (will that ever come?)
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But it turns out I see you cry
Because the person you love, he loves someone else
I know how painful it is
Because you're the one who made me feel that way
You are change
You are no longer ‘The Shy Nice Girl’
But the ‘The Glum Cold Girl’
I hardly ever see you smile again
I can not stand to see the tears keep coming out of your beautiful eyes
I want to erase it and make you smile again
I want to make you happy
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5 January 2007
A year has passed by so quickly. That means has been 2 years. 2 years I kept looking at you from here. It has been 2 years since I love you. And it's been a year since you broke my heart. But I still try to be happy because you're so happy with him. Although I'm still not willing to see you with him but I've got used to see you with him. But no matter how much i'm getting used to it my heart still remain hurt when you smile at him, when your eyes send out love when you look at him.
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26 February 2007
But i'm totally wrong. Apparently he could not make you happy, he even make you cry. Because it turns out that he loves someone else. Someone you also love. Choi Gina, your bestfriend. I know you definitely hurt.
You pretend to be fine in front of them. Even you seem very happy because two people you love can be a couple. And I know it's just a mask so you do not hurt them, so you do not ruin your friendship with them. I always saw you crying in this park. Crying, for your stupidity because you didn’t dare confess your feelings to him. I also hurt to see you like this. You never smile again, you just give them your fake smile. You're so glum. Always crying silently. My heart is really hurt, even more than when I know you love someone else.
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13 September 2007
During this month you never come back to this park. You always try to make yourself busy. You also make a distance with them. Today it seems like I can not go to the park. Since I came home from school because it was raining so hard without stopping. Though I came, not necessarily you are there. It 22:10 PM already, I decide to sleep.
But I can not sleep my heart is worried remembered you. I get up from my bed. I see from the window the the rain was still pouring down. 'What are you doing now? Are you feeling better? 'I keep remembering you. I feel something undesirable will happen to you. I had to check it now. Without thinking too long I grabbed my jacket and an umbrella then ran to the park. For some reason my heart says I can definitely find you there.
Turns out I was right I saw you sat at the ground. You used a blue knee-length dress. You lowered your face, you was silent even when rain forces continue to attack. I know you must be crying now. You raised your head, then lifted your face. You shouted in the rain, as I ever did. I couldn’t hear clearly what you said because we were in a quite far distance and because the rain was so heavy.
I can not stand to see this. I can not stand to see you crying. I do not want you to go on like this. I want you to be like before. I miss your beautiful dazzling smile. I want to wipe the tears from your eyes and see your beautiful smile again. Why only now? Why not earlier? If only it's appear from the beginning you probably will not end up like this.
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Does it appears now?
The courage that I’ve been waiting for so long
Does it finally come?
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