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It's late.

Damn people wouldn't let me go.

Every ing time; 'Encore, encore!'

But every ing time, I always do it in the end.

Why is that?

Why do I always have to please every one?

I don't even know them. Why do I have to please every ing one of them?

I walk inside the elevator of the hole of an apartment complex. My hood rests heavily on top of my head, but hell at least it covers my face.

The elevator door opens.

My heart starts pounding a little louder than usual as I walk down the same old ty hallway.

It skips a beat when I turn the corner...and I see you.

I see you.

You sit with your hunched back against the flaked wall, slightly rocking yourself back and forth.

Even though I'm quite a distance away from you, I can hear your sobs.

I always hear them.

I always see you.

And you're always sitting against that wall. Every night.

There are various glass bottles sitting beside you, all of which are empty.

I walk ahead and stop by the door that's beside yours.

Yes, you live right beside me. I live right beside you. And every night...I have to see you like this.

Why do you cry?

I've seen your face before.

It's ing beautiful.

I reach inside my backpack like I always do every night. I take out a small circular cake wrapped in s clear plastic.

Every night, I would stop by the bakery shop to get you something. I want you to know that my actions weren't out of pity; the cake's to help you see that someone cares for you.

I gently place the cake beside you.

I try and make the sound of me unlocking the door audible enough to catch your attention..but you don't flinch.

You still continue sobbing.

Your short black hair is messy but it looks unbelievably soft. The skin on your hands that your covering your eyes with is so white.

I want to say something. Anything.

But I can't.

You're too perfect for someone like me.

I finally open my door and I step inside, not forgetting to glance at your shaking figure before I close it gently.

 

It's late.

I turn the corner and my heart skips a beat once again as I see you.

Still sitting against the wall beside your apartment door.

Why do you cry?

Once again, I try to muster up everything I can to say something to you.

But I can't.

I place another cake beside your sobbing body.

I gently close my apartment door behind me.

I toss off my shoes and fling my jacket across the room. I drop onto my bed, not bothering to do anything else.

I'm in love with you.

I grow more and more in love with you every night.

My head perks up as I hear your apartment door open. I hear your footsteps stumble in.

You're always quite drunk.

Why?

Who broke your heart?

Who would do something so demonic and sinful as to break your angelic heart?

I unconciously listen through the thin, drywall as you cry yourself to sleep.

Every night.

 

I finally said something to you.

I was a metre away from you when I gulp to moisten my airway.

"Hey."

It wasn't much.

But it was something.

You stop sobbing but you didn't do anything else apart from that. You kept your face between your knees.

And then you continue sobbing. A little quieter this time.

I thought I could say something else...but I couldn't.

Instead, I just leave the cake beside you once again.

I make my way inside my apartment. Every morning, I would find the cakes gone; that thought cheers me up as I assume that you take it with you.

And for that, I thank you.

 

It's late.

I turn the corner and I see you, sobbing. Bottles lie around you.

I take a deep breath when I place the small cake beside you.

I see that you noticed my presence as your sobbing lightens. I step back and was on the process of turning my key into the door lock when I see your head move up from the corner of my eye.

I turn my head...and I see your face.

That angelic, immaculate face.

Despite the redness around your eyes, you looked so beautiful. You stare at me with glassy and tired eyes. You sniffles as you moisten your lips. Those lips.

"What the hell are you looking at?"

Your voice is smoother than I imagined it would be.

I'm not gonna lie, I was taken aback by your question.

I wanted to reply...but your stare can melt anyone. Those dark, doe-eyes.

When I don't speak for a while, you scoff and then put your head between again.

You start quietly sobbing.

Why are you sad?

Can't you see that I care for you?

 

I place the cake beside you. As I look for my keys inside my backpack, I hear that voice again:

"What do you want?"

I'm taken aback once again but I stop looking for my keys and then look at you.

You were staring up at me, with an almost angry look in your eyes.

Did I do something?

I try to speak:

"I...I..."

You sniff and stare at the wall across from you,

" off."

I can never be mad at you. I don't care if you insult me in every language there is...I still love you. I still want to help you.

"I'm...I'm Yongguk."

I gulp as I try to make conversation.

You continue staring at the wall, and you smirk. Almost sarcastically.

"I said off. Yongguk."

I gulp.

I turn the key...and walk inside.

 

I see you at the end of the hall again. Sitting and sobbing.

I walk towards your direction.

I place the cake beside you.

I walk over to my door.

"Himchan. I'm Himchan."

I freeze.

I stare at your small figure.

You told me your name.

It was one of the most happiest moments of my life.

I feel a stupid smile make its way up my face. I nod.

"You still don't..."

I look at you, confused. I still don't what?

Before I could ask...you start sobbing again.

I want to pull you close. I want to kiss you. I want to...make love to you.

But I can't.

 

It's late.

As I pull up my hood and leave the underground, I remember when you told me your name.

Himchan. Himchan. Himchan.

A name as beautiful as your face. Your entire being.

A name--- Your name--- Himchan---

I...I know that name.

Where?

Where have I heard that name before?

In a moment, flashes of images sped through my mind.

Yes. I remember now.

.

A car accident.

We were both in it.

I was driving.

We slid. I slid. The car flipped.

I...I...I lost my memory.

Then...it all made sense to me.

You were crying because of me.

You were crying because of me.

You weren't just sitting against the wall because you wanted to drink yourself to death.

You sat beside my door because you were waiting for me.

You were waiting for me to remember you.

You loved me.

And I suddenly forget you.

I stop in my tracks and I feel every fibre in my being cry in agony.

I gasp and then run. I run. I run as fast as my legs could carry me.

I don't bother taking the elevator, I just run up the flights of stairs.

Please be there, Himchan.

Channie.

I run down the hallway, with its lights flickering. Almost mocking me. Angry at me for forgetting you. I can understand them.

I turn the corner and my heart skips a beat when I don't see you.

You're not there.

Why...

My legs are weak. My mind is weak. My heart is weak.

My eyes start to water and I find it hard to breathe as I walk up to where you usually sit.

My legs give out.

I slam my back against the wall and I drop to the ground. I lift my right knee and place my right elbow on it.

I put my fingers against my lips as I cry out loud.

I'm so sorry, Himchan.

I'm so sorry for forgetting you.

After what seemed like an hour, I could feel my eyes wanting to escape my skull because I've been crying so much.

Then, I feel something poking against my lower right side. I look down.

I see a small cake.

I feel a body sit a feet away from me.

My heart skips.

I look to my right...and I see you.

You're looking back at me.

With a small smile on your face.

A smile that said a thousand words.

A smile that told me you forgive me.

A smile that told me...you love me. I sniff and smile back.

You stand up and help me up on my feet.

I take out my keys with you behind me. I open the door and I step aside to let you in first.

You give me another smile before walking in. I follow suit.

Thank you, Kim Himchan.

For forgiving me.

For letting me back into your life.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

======BAP======