Dara

 

I was 12 and the new girl in town

when I met him.

 

“Hi! I am Jiyong. What’s your name?”

 

“Sandara” I said,

mesmerized by the raven-haired boy.

 

“That’s an odd name for a girl” he said

 

“Maybe I am an odd girl”

 

Dark brown eyes stared into mine.

I wondered what he saw?

 

“You’re not” he said softly.

 

I blushed.

 

“Want to be my friend?” he asked.

 

“Sure” I gladly accepted.

 

“From now on I’ll call you Dara”

 

So I was.

So we became friends.

 

 

 

Used to Be

 

I would sit on a swing

and you would push me

 

When you have an apple

you’d cut it in half

and give the bigger part to me

 

I would tell you my problems

and tell me not to worry

 

We used to be friends

            You and I

 

But time passed by (4 years)

and you outgrew me

 

 

 

 

G Dragon

 

I am the “It Boy”

Mr. Popular

 

I hang with the popular crew

I date the most sought out girls

I party like there’s no tomorrow

 

But I wasn’t always like this

I used to be Jiyong

Simple and ordinary

 

I got bored and decided to change

I dyed my hair blonde

 

That was 2 years ago

 

 

 

Sick and Tired

 

I never knew being popular

could be suffocating

Maintaining my image

Means I have to watch out

for my every move

 

Being at the top is lonely

When everyone else befriends you

For whom they think you are

Not for whom you are

 

Come to think of it

I’m not sure who I am anymore

But I don’t know who else to be

 

I am sick and tired of this crap

But it’s all I have

 

 

 

 

Rift

 

I don’t know when this chasm

appeared between us

A huge rift has opened

that I could not cross

 

You’re down with the cool kids now

G Dragon, they would call you

 

While I am still me, Sandara

The girl with the odd name

Dara, once your friend

Now just a nobody

 

And like a nobody

You no longer saw me

 

Social convention states that

The likes of you and I don’t mix

Must be why the rift has turned

Into this Grand Canyon of distance

 

With me on my side

And you on the other

 

 

 

 From Afar

 

I can’t recall when was it

that we stopped talking?

 

Maybe it was when I started to change

Without meaning to,

I pushed you away

 

Time and neglect

has put this distance between us

And social rules forbid me to cross it

 

I can’t go back to the way things were,

Knowing I left you behind

 

So I contented myself watching you from afar

And sending you my smile

when you feel lonely

 

 

 

 

Accident

 

I was used to being on the outskirts

of everyone’s attention

until I accidentally bumped into him

and spilled strawberry slush

on his crisp white shirt

 

The shirt was suddenly stained red

like the blooming embarrassment

on my cheeks

 

“Mianhe” I said.

My first word to you after 2 years

 

Your friends got angry and called me names

I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me

 

“Enough” you said and left

 

I was surprised when you took my hand

and pulled me with you

 

 

 

 

Sorry

 

Away from the crowd,

I studied her closely

She seemed the same

yet prettier than I remember

 

“Mianhe” she apologized again

 

“It’s alright, Dara”

 I used the name I gave her after a long time

 

Brown eyes stared into mine,

filled with question and surprise

 

“I thought you’ve forgotten about me”

 

“We may have stopped talking,

but I have never forgotten you.

I am sorry for being a rotten friend.”

 

“It’s alright Ji. You should go back to them.

I don’t want you to suffer because of me.”

 

She used my old name.

 

“No, this is where I should be”

 

 

 

 

 Repercussions

 

My so-called friends were mad

that I chose Dara over them

and the girls that used to follow me

ditched me upon learning about this

I have stopped being invited to parties

 

I dyed my hair black

 

 

 

Alone

 

You were used to a crowd

surrounding you,

admiring you

 You were always on top

 

I’m amongst the crowd

surrounding you,

admiring you

but you didn’t notice

 

It’s alright

It doesn’t hurt

I’m used to being alone

 

The crowd parted

and you’re left in the middle,

standing

 

Tell me,

Does it hurt to be alone?

 

 

 

Back to You

 

Now that I am not Mr. Popular

I could hang with Dara again

I hope I was not too late

I hope she’d still accept me

 

I wanted to make up for the lost years

I wanted for things to go back

to the way they were

 

Truth is, I’ve missed her

 

 

 

 

Secret

 

He’s back.

My friend Jiyong is back

 

A bridge has formed

between the rift between us

 

Problem is, I am in love with him

A secret I have kept to myself

 

 

 

Switch

 

She grew in front of me

But only now do I see her truly

 

Fair skin that glows

Long flowing hair

Smooth cheeks that easily blush

Lips tainted with strawberries

Eyes that speak of innocence

A smile as bright as the sun

 

My heart races when I look at her

like a switch has been

 

Love is set into motion

 

 

 

 

The Proposal

 

I love her

I know I do

And I want her to love me too

 

But what do I do to make her mine

How do I propose to a friend of mine?

 

 

 

  

The Word Unspoken

 

Yesterday you smiled at me

I smiled back

 

Today

I saw you again smiling

And I smiled back

 

Tomorrow’s just another day

You’d smile again

And I’d smile back

Waiting to hear

The word unspoken

 

 

 

 

Apple

 

I gave you an apple

 

“Just like the old times?” you asked.

 

“No, It’s all yours.”

 

You were puzzled

 

“Have you ever marvelled how a human heart

is almost shaped like an apple?

Like this apple, I’m giving my heart to you”

 

 

 

 

Butterflies

 

There were butterflies in my stomach

and butterflies in my heart

This fluttery feeling that wouldn’t stop

 

He pulled me close as he leaned in

I closed my eyes and waited for him

 

I felt the butterfly in his kisses over and over again.

 

 

 

 

 

“I love you Dara”

 

“I love you too Ji”

 

There’s no my side or your side

 

Only the two of us with love in between