Sehun liked mornings.

Well, he didn't really like mornings. He liked the peace and quiet that came with mornings, especially when he was the first one to wake up. He lay in his bed, feeling almost content.

It was still dark outside, the sun not yet making an appearance. He glanced at the window, the curtains blocking the view outside. The dorm was quiet, for a change. It always was in the early mornings. After the first few mornings where he laid in his bed, he learned to savour the quiet. It didn't come often (Kyung Soo always woke up earlier than anybody else and more often than not, the older male could be heard in the kitchen getting breakfast ready), so he learnt to just take a moment to enjoy it before everyone else woke up.

The room was quiet, except for his breathing and Ji Hye's. Glancing at the bed, he suddenly remembered what had jolted him awake.

His sleep had been plagued with dreams. They weren't nightmares, but they weren't exactly pleasant either. He had a feeling he would be haunted by them for the days to come.

He supposed the main theme of his dreams had been possibilities. It was filled with promises of a future he knew he would never be able to grasp. In a way, he supposed he had had a nightmare of sorts, taunting him with the possibility of a different – a better – future or present.

It probably wasn't an accident that all of them had revolved around Ji Hye.

He turned, sighing slightly as he faced her bed. He couldn't see her in the dim lighting of the room, but he could picture her face in his mind clearly. He wasn't saying he watched her while she slept, but she had fallen asleep on his shoulder or in his lap more than once while they were on their way to a schedule and it wasn't like there was anything more interesting to do other than watch the scenery pass or occasionally study her face as it changed, depending on the dream she was having.

He wanted to tell himself he only did that because he was bored, but that wasn't the real reason. He knew it wasn't the real reason. It was because he had probably developed feelings that were more than friendship.

Who was he trying to kid? He had been fighting these feelings for too long. He'd been fighting them since they were in high school. Their graduation was a couple months away and he didn't know if he was supposed to be happy or sad.

In some ways, he was happy. He didn't have to wake up early to go to school after a late-night practice and he didn't have to wear the eye-catching yellow uniform. Then again, he'd miss his friends and his teachers… and he probably wouldn't be able to have Ji Hye all to himself anymore.

He was too used to being able to joke with her in class or cramming together for a test. He'd miss spending lunch with her and stealing food from each other while they talked about nothing and everything. He knew it wasn't going to be the last time he saw her (they were in the same group after all), but to Sehun, he felt like it was the last time he'd have her all to himself without needing to share her attention with the others. He wanted to be selfish and keep her all to himself for a little while longer, but he knew it wasn't possible. Maybe he could have her all to himself if she decided to go to the same college as him, but they had never talked about college or what they were going to do after high school, other than the obvious (secretly, he knows he's been avoiding the topic, especially with Ji Hye, because the future kind of scares him).

He heard a rustle as she shifted and held his breath, hoping she wasn't waking up yet. He didn't want her to wake up because that would mean he'd have to go back to being Sehun-ah, her close friend (not even her best friend, since that position was taken by Yixing) and he'd have to forget his impossible feelings for her no matter how much he didn't want to. He'd have to go back to being an older brother to her even though he didn't want to be an older brother. He wanted to be so much more, but that wasn't possible.

She rolled over, but didn't move further. He waited for a few more moments and relaxed when she didn't make a sound. He still had the morning to himself and that was the way he liked it.

In the silence of their shared room, his thoughts drifted back to his dreams. His stupid dreams that had him thinking about possibilities and how impossible they were.

He had dreamt that he was back in fifth grade and he was back to that day before that SM scouting lady had decided to chase him for half an hour around Hongdae. He and Ji Hye had been walking around, seeing the various street performances while sharing tteokbokki and it was just one of those days where they were just being the best friends they really were (he's noticed how much things have changed since they were twelve and he wishes he could go back to being her best friend but he guesses not talking to her for almost two years isn't something that can be forgiven easily).

In his dream, he found how it might have been if they had actually been successful in running away from the crazy lady. They had hidden from her by ducking into a clothes shop and hiding in the changing rooms. Afterwards, they had cautiously ducked out from the changing room (ignoring the stares they got from the other customers) before erupting into laughter.

They would have continued walking around for a little while longer before heading home and forgetting all about the incident.

That was the future where they would have gotten together. He would have asked her to the winter dance their school held when they were fourteen and he would have asked her to be his girlfriend awkwardly. She would have said yes and they would have auditioned for SM together instead of separately. They would have still gotten into EXO, but would have hid their relationship from the hyungs for the first two months before they were found out. They would have helped them hide their relationship and although Sehun and Ji Hye wouldn't be quite content with secret smiles during broadcasts or stolen kisses in between changes during concerts, they were together and that was all he could have asked for.

That dream made Sehun ache for a future that he knew couldn't happen because they hadn't escaped from the crazy SM lady and he had gotten into SM before Ji Hye. They hadn't gotten together in high school and they didn't have stolen kisses in the middle of rehearsal or whatever (he definitely wants to, though, but Ji Hye doesn't like him that way). He never thought he'd regret signing on with SM as much as he did when he saw what could have been. It might not have been the best relationship to have, but it was a relationship nonetheless and it was certainly better than what they had now.

To be perfectly honest, he would have completely forgotten they had ever been friends if it hadn't been for his mother. Between practices and school, he never really had time to talk to childhood friends. He was pretty sure that was also the year Ji Hye had moved back to Daegu. He felt guilty for that and thought that Ji Hye being placed in EXO with him was the second chance he desperately wanted.

He didn't fault her for not wanting to talk to him the first few times they practiced. If he was her, he wouldn't have wanted to talk to him either. Maybe she had forgotten him to. Two years was a long time, after all. Especially for teenagers.

He wondered what would have happened if he had at least confessed his feelings. It didn't matter when anymore. As long as he did it. Confessed before it was too late.

Then again, what was considered too late?

When they became too famous? Sehun sighed. In his opinion, they were already too famous, if the number of fans that crowded the SM building were anything to go by. Besides, did fame really factor into his choice? Not really.

Before she fell for someone else? His thoughts flew towards Jongin and Yixing. They were the most likely rivals, weren't they? He frowned, puffing out a breath and causing his fringe to flutter. Maybe not Jongin. Ji Hye and Jongin didn't get along (maybe he's watched too many dramas with Kyung Soo and Ji Hye if he thinks there's a possibility Ji Hye might be in love with Jongin. They're barely on a first-name basis).

Before she decided he wasn't worth it? He snorted. In order to do that, she had to think he was worth it first. He didn't think he was worth it, so how could she?

Ji Hye shifted once more and he could tell she was waking up. She yawned and stretched. Sehun could feel himself panicking. Here was the perfect opportunity. He could tell her now. I like you. Three simple words.

She rubbed her eyes and squinted at him, smiling sleepily. "Morning," she greeted, sitting up.

The words caught in his throat. No, he couldn't. There was too much to lose. The last thing he wanted to do was scare her away. If he told her now, she might demand he switch rooms with Kyung Soo. He couldn't do that (because he likes her so much that he's a coward for her).

"Good morning," he mumbled back, feigning sleep. You're such a coward, Oh Sehun. "You're up early."

"Too early. Did I wake you?"

He shook his head, turning so he could look at her without needing to turn his head. "I just… woke up," he lied, smiling ever so slightly.

She squinted at the alarm clock next to her bed. "We beat Kyung Soo this morning… should we go wake him up?" There was a wicked glint in her eyes that reeked of trouble and mischief.

He gave a non-committal shrug. "Why not?"

He let her leave first as he prepared himself for another day of being Sehun-ah. It hurt, but he was too much of a coward to tell her what he felt. As if she would feel the same way. He'd rather suffer the pain of unrequited, hidden love rather than jilted lover. He'd rather be in pain rather than have her look at him in disgust.

After all, he loved her.

(But she'll never love him back.)

-0-

So... I took forever to come out with this chapter :D It's not quite what I wanted, but oh well.

Hey, I missed doing A/Ns too, so I thought I'd start here. Yup. This is an A/N.

Okay, so it's late and I have an exam in... seven hours, so I'm going to get some sleep and stuff.

Nights.