Title: Limbo

Author: midorihaven

Pairing: Kyusung

Rating:  G

Genre: AU, fluff, romance

Prompt: "I pinky swear we won't ever have a happy ending... (true love has no ending)"

Summary- Yesung is always looking for his movie like happy ending, but little does he know that he didn’t have to look too far.

It's never a good sign when the lights are off and their living room is filled with nothing but a ghostly flicker provided by the glow of the tv screen. Yesung was huddled up on the sofa with a blanket draped over his head and a tissue box cradled in his lap. Kyuhyun bit down on his tongue and swallowed his usual cheeky remarks in order not to add insult to injury. It must have been another dismal break up and if Kyuhyun wasn't careful with his words he'd risk bruising his roommate's glass-like psyche. Then he'd be dealing with a depressed Yesung for months and that was the last thing Kyuhyun wanted.

They had been roommates for two years and he found out the hard way that Yesung didn't want to talk about break ups, not even if Kyuhyun was trying to cheer him up by bashing the ex-boyfriend (because in Kyuhyun's opinion all of Yesung's previous boyfriends were class A douchebags for trampling on his precious hyung's heart). Kyuhyun sighed internally and dropped his backpack on the floor with an unceremonious thump before assuming the movie watching position – which was propping his feet on the coffee table and slinging an arm around the lifeless lump that hogged the center of the sofa.

Yesung didn't verbally acknowledge Kyuhyun's presence, but he shifted closer until their knees touched and he could rest his head on Kyuhyun's shoulder. Kyuhyun pulled the fleece blanket off of Yesung's head and planted a chaste kiss into the soft, raven locks before turning his attention to the tv screen. Kyuhyun grimaced at Yesung's movie choice, Sleepless in Seattle. Yesung's movie choice was always an indicator of his mood; the sappier the movie, the more depressed he was. Well, at least it wasn't Titanic, the break up with Kibum had triggered a five day marathon of that tragic three hour love story and Kyuhyun hasn't been able to forgive Leonardo DiCaprio's existence since that event.

Kyuhyun really hated watching romance movies for two reasons. The first reason was that it always left Yesung in a blubbering mess and nothing hurt Kyuhyun more than seeing the older man cry. It felt like slowly twisting daggers were mangling his heart. Kyuhyun preferred Yesung when he was smiling, giggling, and blushing. The dark brooding moments that Yesung had whenever he sunk into depression or got his heart broken did not suit the older man in the least.

The second reason he hated watching romance movies was that there was always a theme of destiny, kismet, fate. The two star crossed lovers were always meant to be together and then they would kiss and live happily ever after. Kyuhyun hated this cliché theme of love stories, not because he didn't believe in destiny, but because it seemed like it would impossible for Kyuhyun to ever achieve his own happily ever after.

Kyuhyun was in love, but rather than being able to live in a state of blissful happy endings it was more like an exercise in futility. It was frustrating to have the one person he desired most to be dangled before him like a forbidden fruit that he could never reach.

Kyuhyun pulled Yesung closer and the latter buried his face against Kyuhyun's skin and made snuffling noises against his neck. Kyuhyun felt goosebumps rise on his flesh and he bit down on his lip before he attempted anything that he might regret. It felt like Yesung was put on this earth just to test Kyuhyun's restraint. He was allowed to hug and kiss Yesung; he was allowed to cuddle with him and laugh with him; but he wasn't allowed to call Yesung his own.

Kyuhyun didn't want to settle for being just friends, but he was afraid he wouldn't be able to handle it if they weren't friends either. He got downright short-tempered and ornery whenever he was separated from Yesung for too long. The older man's hugs and kisses were like a sick addiction for Kyuhyun and his withdrawal symptoms were always severe. It had gotten to the point where Kyuhyun’s other friends wouldn't even invite him on getaways, because they knew he'd spend the whole time lamenting about how much he missed his roommate.

Kyuhyun snorted when he felt a warm, even breath feather against his skin. Yesung had fallen asleep. Was it so easy to fall asleep in the arms of a man that wasn't your boyfriend? Kyuhyun didn't think he'd be at ease enough with anyone else to just fall asleep in their arms, but Yesung was a different story. Yesung was the only person Kyuhyun would ever lower his guard for.

He wondered if Yesung had spent most of his nights sleeping in Kangin's arms before they broke up – but then again he knew that wasn't possible because Yesung slept at home alone even when he was dating and Yesung woke up in Kyuhyun's bed more often than not. The older man got lonely easily and suffered from nightmares often, so he’d creep into Kyuhyun’s room and crawl under the covers with him.

Kyuhyun sighed, if Yesung treated his boyfriends with the kind of tenderness and care that he showered Kyuhyun with, no one could ever bear to let him go and Yesung would never have to have his heart broken. But Kyuhyun had to admit, the clueless way in which Yesung treated his boyfriends actually worked out in Kyuhyun's favour. He didn't want anyone to steal Yesung away so he encouraged Yesung's ridiculous behaviour. Every cute pout, every lingering touch, every affectionate look; Kyuhyun accepted it greedily and returned it tenfold. Their relationship had already broken the boundaries of platonic friendship, but Kyuhyun was stuck in limbo – no way forward and no way back - and it was agonizing.

The credits started rolling before Kyuhyun realized it and he shifted his position in order to reach the remote control, but he froze in place when a soft whine escaped Yesung's lips.

“Did I wake you, Hyung?” Kyuhyun whispered softly.

“No.”

Yesung cinched his arms around Kyuhyun's waist and buried his face into Kyuhyun's t-shirt.

“We should go to bed, Hyung.”

“But I'm still watching the movie,” Yesung mumbled with his eyes closed.

“It's over.”

“Oh.”

Yesung released his grip on Kyuhyun and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Kyuhyun tried not to frown at the loss of warmth.

“It's kind of hard to watch a movie with your eyes closed, Yesungie.”

Yesung pouted. “Did they meet at the top of the Empire State Building?”

“Of course they did, you've seen this movie hundreds of times.”

“I wonder if anyone would meet me on the top of the Empire State Building.”

“I would,” Kyuhyun whispered.

Yesung tilted his head and stared at Kyuhyun intently. “Did you say something, Kyu?”

“It's time for bed,” Kyuhyun lied.

Yesung stayed rooted in the sofa cushions, “I want to stay up for a little while longer. Keep me company?”

Kyuhyun scowled and cursed Yesung's ability to look so innocent. The raven-haired man knew that there was no way Kyuhyun could ever deny him. He nodded to his roommate stiffly and agreed to watch Sleepless in Seattle from the very beginning. However, Yesung fell asleep with his head on Kyuhyun’s lap as soon as they had restarted the DVD and Kyuhyun glumly accepted his fate as he settled in for another uncomfortable night on the sofa.

The next morning, Yesung woke up with a sore back and a crick in his neck. He shifted groggily and swore to himself that he would never sleep on the sofa again. He looked over to his left, Kyuhyun had fallen asleep in a half slumped position with his legs propped up against the coffee table and Yesung felt bad for his lanky roommate. If Yesung was suffering from aches and pains, Kyuhyun would be even worse off.

The young brunette looked innocent and peaceful while he slept, but Kyuhyun wasn’t a morning person, he would probably wake up with a grumpy frown while whining about the miseries of falling asleep on the sofa. Yesung chuckled to himself, a disgruntled Kyuhyun was nothing that he couldn’t handle; he actually found it quite adorable. Yesung stared at his sleeping roommate and trailed a curious finger along the soft skin of Kyuhyun's cheek before his trance was broken by the ringing of the doorbell.

Yesung bolted for the front door before the bell could be rung for a second time, he didn't want the visitor to wake Kyuhyun from his slumber. The smile faded from his lips when he opened the door to reveal his ex-boyfriend, Kangin.

“What are you doing here?” Yesung asked accusingly.

Even though they were officially over, Kangin still made him feel giddy, like there were butterflies in his stomach. He dropped his gaze uncomfortably. Yesung was determined to hate the man standing before him, but he couldn't steel his heart against the puppy dog eyes that the big brute was flashing at him.

“I just wanted to drop off your stuff.”

Kangin handed him a paper bag filled with a handful of CDs and a couple of stuffed animals – memories of their time together. Yesung chewed on his lip nervously and fidgeted with the paper handles as they faced each other in awkward silence.

“So this is how it ends between us?”

“It never began.”

Yesung looked up at Kangin in shock. He expected to be on the receiving end of an icy stare, but the taller man merely looked sad and somewhat defeated.

“What do you mean it never began?”

“Don't kid yourself Yesung, you were never in love with me even though you say it so easily.”

“But I do love you!” Yesung declared, but he hastily lowered his voice when he heard shuffling noises coming from the sofa.

Kangin followed the direction of Yesung's gaze and smiled sadly.

“Not in the way that I want you to, not in the way that I love you.”

Yesung's eyes watered and he clasped onto Kangin's hand. “I can try harder.”

Kangin pulled his hand away and suddenly flicked Yesung's forehead, causing the latter to yelp painfully.

“You shouldn't have to try harder. You're either in love or you're not. And you are in love, Yesung, but you just keep confessing to the wrong person.”

“I don't understand...”

“You never do.”

Kangin pulled Yesung into his arms and kissed him long and hard. He poured all of his passion and all of his pent up frustration into the kiss, but Yesung broke away before Kangin was done.

“W-what are you doing?”

Kangin smirked.

“Just something for you to think about. There's a difference between how you respond to me and how you respond to the one that you're really in love with. To be honest with you Yesung, you were never fair game, but I just had to try.”

Kangin's eyes flickered over to the sofa again before he his heel and left Yesung stunned speechless in the doorway.

Yesung stared down at the paper bag in his hands and marvelled at how a few months worth of feelings could be so neatly contained into one little package. He was happy with Kangin, he felt cherished, he felt safe, but he knew that there was always something missing between them. He didn’t feel any special spark in their relationship. It was never like the movies, where the characters felt like they were destined for one another, but movies were different from reality. Yesung never expected to find an all consuming everlasting love, but he had hoped for something similar. He believed that relationships could be nurtured and cultivated like flower gardens. He believed that if he tended to his relationships carefully it would grow and bloom into the happy ending that he had always hoped for.

Yesung sighed dejectedly, his love stories always ended with him standing alone.

Yesung was brought back to his senses when he heard a rustling noise come from the vicinity of the sofa. He immediately went to check on his roommate and sighed in relief when he found Kyuhyun still sound asleep. The brunette had merely shifted his body to a more comfortable position and curled his long legs up onto the couch cushions.

Yesung covered the young man with his fleece blanket and planted a kiss on his forehead. Kangin’s words echoed in his mind  ’There's a difference between how you respond to me and how you respond to the one that you're really in love with.’ Yesung stared at Kyuhyun for a pregnant moment and contemplated exactly what kind of relationship that he had with his roommate. They were certainly more than just roommates, but could they actually be more than just friends?

Yesung was definitely fond of Kyuhyun and the little brat had a way of weaselling into his heart when no one else could. If Yesung was honest with himself, he didn’t miss his ex-boyfriends half as much as he missed Kyuhyun when they were separated for just one evening. His previous boyfriends all hated the amount of time that he spent with his roommate, but in the end, Kyuhyun was the only one that made Yesung feel needed.

“You would never leave me, would you, Kyuhyun-ah?” Yesung whispered to the sleeping man, not expecting a response.

“Of course I wouldn’t,” a deep voice replied.

Kyuhyun startled Yesung so badly that he stumbled backwards and landed on the floor. When Yesung looked up he was staring into a pair of bright brown eyes that were as clear as day.

“Were you awake this whole time?”

Kyuhyun shrugged and slowly stretched out his arms and legs, “I was awake for most of it.”

“Why didn’t you say something?!”

“I didn’t want to interrupt your passionate kiss with Kangin.”

Yesung’s face flushed with embarrassment, but his heart twinged painfully at the devastated look on Kyuhyun’s face.

“H-he kissed me, I didn’t kiss him back.”

Yesung didn’t understand why he felt like he needed to make an excuse for what transpired between him and Kangin, but somehow he felt like he owed Kyuhyun an explanation.

“I know,” Kyuhyun answered sullenly.

“Why do you look upset?”

“I’m not. Actually, I want to thank Kangin for giving me an idea.”

“What idea?”

Yesung wasn’t sure if he liked where the conversation was going, he couldn’t read the expression on Kyuhyun’s face.

“About who you might be in love with.” Kyuhyun grabbed Yesung by the chin and tilted his face up towards his own. “Shall we test out his theory?”

Yesung was frozen stiff with fear when Kyuhyun’s lips came crashing down on his own.

He and Kyuhyun had kissed many times before, but never on the lips and he didn’t know what to do. Kyuhyun’s plush lips moved against his own, trying to coax a reaction out of him and Yesung felt his body slowly relax and give into the myriad of inexplicable sensations taking over his body. He felt giddy and excited and...dizzy.

Yesung gasped, trying to take in a breath of much needed air when Kyuhyun seized the opportunity by delving his tongue deep into the warm, hot cavern of Yesung’s mouth. Yesung felt like fireworks were exploding and he clung onto Kyuhyun with all the strength that he could muster from his awkward seated position on the floor.

Yesung was lightheaded when they finally broke apart and Kyuhyun pressed their foreheads together with a smile.

“Well, that is something to think about,” Kyuhyun said mysteriously before abruptly pulling away.

Yesung was left dazed and dumbfounded, still sitting on the floor after his sudden fall, and he had no idea what had just hit him. It was too much information for him to process. One moment Kangin had kissed him and the next moment it was Kyuhyun.

Yesung traced his fingertips over his lips in shock, his precious dongsaeng, his adorable little roommate, Kyuhyun, had kissed him! Yesung didn’t know what to think, or rather, he couldn’t think at all. He was amazed that he even knew his own name after such a terrible shock. Not that the sudden turn of events was unpleasant. It wasn’t unpleasant at all, it was just unexpected.

“Hyungggg, I’m hungry, make me some breakfast~~”

Kyuhyun’s childish whine pulled Yesung out of his reverie and Yesung felt somewhat indignant that the former could just kiss him like that out of the blue and act like nothing had changed between them. He shot a nasty look over his shoulder, but Kyuhyun had already retreated to the bathroom for a shower. Just the same old morning routine, but Yesung felt like nothing would ever be the same again.

“Yah! Cho Kyuhyun! You could at least have the decency to help me up off the floor before you go demanding that I cook for you!”

There was no reply other than Kyuhyun’s satisfied hum echoing through the shower stall. Yesung loved the little brat, but sometimes he just wanted to strangle him. Yesung’s anger suddenly dissipated when the thought occurred to him - he loved Kyuhyun. Not just in a friendly or brotherly way, it was very possible that he was in love with Kyuhyun. The realization knocked the breath from Yesung’s lungs and constricted around his heart painfully.

All of this time, the one that he really wanted was Kyuhyun.

Breakfast was an awkward affair with Kyuhyun acting like nothing significant had happened and Yesung acting like a jittery schoolgirl on the brink of a nervous breakdown. Kyuhyun was trying to engage in conversation, but Yesung was silent more often than not and refused to make any eye contact.

Kyuhyun was hopeful after Yesung responded to his kiss, but he didn’t want to rush things. On top of it all, he didn’t know what to make of Yesung’s unusual behaviour. Yesung flinched like he had been slapped after Kyuhyun had reached over to wipe a crumb off of his face. Yesung had never retracted from his touches before and it stung when he withdrew from Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun began to worry that he may have shattered the boundaries of their relationship beyond repair. 

“Is everything alright, Hyung?”

Yesung nearly knocked over his coffee cup at the sound of Kyuhyun’s voice and he tried to steady it by clutching onto the porcelain desperately with both hands.

“Everything’s just fine.”

“Maybe you should switch to decaf.”

Kyuhyun chuckled softly as he reached across the table with a napkin to wipe up the spilled drink. Yesung hastily cleared the table before Kyuhyun could come in contact with his hands and the latter felt his stomach give itself a sickening twist.

“I’ll look into that the next time I go to the grocery store.”

Yesung dropped the dishes into the sink with a clatter and scurried off without another word.

He spent the next three days avoiding Kyuhyun and it was torture for the young brunette. Kyuhyun had finally cornered Yesung on the balcony after their third night of skirting around each other and he was so exasperated it took all of his remaining willpower not to tackle the raven-haired man to the floor.

Yesung was alarmed when Kyuhyun had him backed against the railing with a wild look in his eyes.

“K-kyu? Is something wrong?”

“Everything’s wrong!” Kyuhyun hissed through his teeth.

Yesung was genuinely worried at that point.

Kyuhyun looked so absolutely wretched that it broke Yesung’s heart to see him in that state, but Yesung wasn’t aware that he was the reason for his roommate’s distress. Yesung reached out with a tentative hand and gently ran his fingers through Kyuhyun’s hair. Kyuhyun leaned into Yesung’s touch until the latter was softly caressing his face and Kyuhyun nearly purred like a contented cat.

“I’ve missed you.”

Kyuhyun sank to his knees and wrapped his arms around Yesung’s waist. He had been suffering from physical pains since he had been deprived of the older man’s presence for so long. His chest always ached and his hands constantly shook. Now that he had a chance to hold onto Yesung, he wasn’t about to let go. Yesung felt his breath catch in his throat as Kyuhyun clung to him desperately. He felt guilty for avoiding his roommate while he tried to sort through his own feelings.

“Don’t be silly, Kyu. I’m right here, I’m always here.”

“No, it’s different.”

Yesung had avoided him for three days.

Three days of just superficial greetings and nothing more. Three days of just staring forlornly at Yesung’s closed bedroom door. Three days of no hugs, no kisses, no giggles, no exasperated nagging. Without Yesung it was just three days of emptiness that felt like an eternity of imprisonment.

“What’s different?”

Yesung had been wanting to ask Kyuhyun that since they had their first real kiss.

Were things different between them now? Would things change? Was it for the better or the worse? He had been struggling with all the doubts and questions in the back of his mind. He had been anxiously weighing all the pros and cons of how to proceed with their relationship, but the only conclusion that Yesung came to was that it had been a lonely three days.

“Everything.”

Yesung pulled back and looked deep into Kyuhyun’s dark brown eyes.

“I suppose you’re right, everything has changed. We can’t go back to the way we were.”

Yesung ran his fingers through Kyuhyun’s dark brown locks and smiled sadly. He couldn’t just hug and kiss Kyuhyun whenever he wanted anymore, all those actions carried a different meaning for him now. He didn’t feel warm and safe around Kyuhyun anymore. Being with Kyuhyun made him feel simultaneously anxious and reassured, ecstatic and depressed; Kyuhyun made him feel like he was going crazy.

“I don’t regret it though, Hyung. I had a chance and I took it.”

Kyuhyun released his grip around Yesung’s waist and stood back up until his lips hovered just a few centimeters away from Yesung’s own. Yesung took the initiative this time, he pressed forward on his tiptoes until their lips brushed up against each other’s. It was softer and shorter than their first kiss, but it was just as electrifying.

“I’m glad you did.”

Kyuhyun pulled Yesung into a bone-crushing hug. “Be mine, Hyung. I think you were always meant to be mine.”

“Maybe you should kiss me one more time just to be sure.”

Kyuhyun smirked and readily complied. “I have a thousand, no, a million more where that came from as long as I can hear you say you love me.

Yesung smiled shyly and looked up at Kyuhyun hopefully.

“Kyu-ah, do you think we’ll be able to have a happy ending like they do in movies?”

“No,” Kyuhyun answered flatly and Yesung felt his heart fall. “I don’t intend to let us ever have an ending. We’ll be together forever, Yesung. If that’s what you want.”

Yesung lunged at Kyuhyun and wrapped his arms about his neck as tightly as he could without suffocating the younger man.

“I love you.”

A/N: This counts as fluff, right? OTL I hate how cheesy I am. -dies-

- for the lovely rhenny

- for all the kyusung shippers

- thank you to Leann and Naz for taking time to look over this piece of fail fic.

Kyusungcentral- You know I love you right? *hugs*