Why did it have to hurt so much? Chunji would have given anything to go back. Live his life again. Do all those things that he should have done when he still had the chance. But now it was too late.

They were the best of friends. Inseparable siblings from different parents. Their relationship was something special, awed at by many and envied by many others. Through all the trials they faced, how others tried to tear them apart,they survived and came out even stronger.

But death is a force nothing in this world could contend with.

Chunji was a good-looking kid, recognised ever since he was little. But what was more well-known about Lee Chanhee was that despite his good looks and killer smile, he was such a good, innocent, kind hearted child that everyone fell in love with him instantly. He was loyal to his buddies, and they eventually formed Teen Top. And even though he had such great friends, there was someone in Chunji's heart that no one could possibly replace. If today someone told you that this great kid with such a wonderful personality was once a selfish, arrogant 'young master' so to speak, it would be hard to believe. She was the one who changed him.

Lee Myung Eun. Just the sound of her name would brighten up Chunji's day. Coincidentally having the same surname, they became really good friends after meeting when their father's were discussing a business deal. Chunji was utterly fascinated by her in the beginning. Being a single child grown-up in a rich family, he had everything he could possibly want, his every desire taken care of. Upon meeting Myung Eun, his first thought was disgust. He had never encountered this before, to him she was a strange, new phenomenon that was totally foreign to this young, curious boy. The girl he beheld was young like him and just as bright eyed. But what caused Chunji's initial disgust was that she was a cripple.

To the original stuck up Chunji, she was weird, alien even. As time passed, he saw how that petite, fragile girl had, like him, a curious mind and an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. How she was still optimistic even though she would be stuck in a wheelchair her whole life. Even though she could'nt run and jump like all the other kids. Even though she was laughed at and made fun of. She managed to smile her way through, no matter what was thrown her way.

Watching her from the sidelines was like a wake-up call. Gradually, Chunji the snob became Lee Chanhee, Myung Eun's best friend and her protector. He could have easily said that he loved her. She would have said she loved him too.

But exactly how deep was their love?

He lay down, gazing at the twinkling stars from his bedroom window. Slowly, a tear trickled down his cheek, and together came an involuntary sigh. "Oh Myung Eun, what I would give to have you here." Chunji whispered, the memories flashing infront of his eyes.

Seven-year-old Chunji was watching from the window. Again. His father, Mr Lee, had shut him in his room again. Young Master Chunji had thrown another tantrum, threatening to ruin his fathers business deal. Banished to his room, he ruled in silence, a young prince so full of himself. All of a sudden, he caught sight of a pale face peeking out from behind a tree in his garden. The prince jumped up, determined to defend his kingdom. Chunji sneaked up on her from behind. "BOO!!" He cried, and screams echoed round the garden as the intruder wheeled herself away from the attacking prince. Chunji wrinkled his eyebrows. "You can't walk?" At the girl's shy nod, his nose scrunched up in disgust. "Eew, get away from me freak!" That was the first time the high and mighty prince Chunji made a girl cry.

Young Chunji was in his room again, and outside the door he could once again hear voices. He humphed and crossed his arms over his chest. Why did his father always have to lock him in when they had visitors? The other parents brought their children and let them roam around HIS house without supervision, so why couldn't he? It was his own house besides!

An idea crept into his mind. Yes, this was his house. He had the right to do what he wanted... right? His door creaked open, too loud in the silence. All he could hear was his shallow breathing and the steady beating of his heart.  He slowly peeked out and looked around. Not a soul in sight. A sly grin crept onto his face as he proudly stepped out of the room.

"Where are you going?" a quiet voice called out. Chunji whipped his head around. Seeing who it was, he rolled his eyes.

"Don't talk to me you freak! Just leave me alone!" he snapped. Myung Eun's face immediately fell and she turned around, wheeling herself away.

Chunji walked away, glad she was going away. But why did he have this nagging feeling in his heart?

Five years later, Chunji was the same as ever. Myung Eun was matured beyond her age, and often on her own. By this time, when they were only twelve, Chunji had a hoard of fangirls following him around in school. Whenever Chunji saw Myung Eun in school, he would jeer at her and call her all sorts of horrible names. Chunji's fangirls also followed in Chunji's steps, never giving her a break. Wherever she went, the bullying continued. Yet, Chunji still wondered sometimes. He wondered how, despite what he said or all the pranks they played on her, not once did Myung Eun cry or retaliate. She just ignored them and acted like nothing happened. A faint memory called on him, their first meeting. Had she changed since then? Now she seemed cold, an ice princess. Chunji was determined to prove otherwise. And so the planning began...

He hid behind the wall, making sure he timed it right. One... two... three! He tugged on the string hard and held on with all his might. Myung Eun flew out of her wheelchair, which crashed onto the ground about a metre away. Chunji snickered along with his group of fangirls. But he wasn't prepared to meet the fire in Myung Eun's eyes when she glared up at him. Slowly, one hand at a time, she crawled back to her chair, her legs making tracks on the ground. Unwilling to admit defeat, Chunji kicked her wheelchair away. Myung Eun shot him another death glare, which he promptly ignored as his fangirls giggled by the sidelines. Again, Myung Eun crawled back to her chair, one arm's length at a time. She was sweating profusely, panting heavily as she tried to haul herself up, but to no avail. Chunji guffawed.

When something sharp hit him in the middle of his forehead. Tears sprang to his eyes and he gingerly touched the sore area. Myung Eun was still sending him looks that could kill. She shouted at him between sobs. "YOU IDIOT! THIS WAS WHAT YOU WANTED ALL ALONG WASN'T IT! WELL ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!"

Chunji turned his back on her and walked away. But somehow, the satisfaction didn't come.

School was over once again. Chunji was walking out of school looking, as usual, like a prince. All of a sudden Chunji tripped on his untied laces and fell...

Right into a pile of dog poo.

Passerby's pointed and laughed. Not a single soul came up to help. Chunji stood there and started to cry. He cried like never before. Now he knew what is was like. How it felt like to have the world turn against him. How it felt like to be all alone. How Myung Eun felt all these years. Someone materialised at his side. Chunji sniffed. "Go ahead and laugh." But Myung Eun simply shook her head and smiled reassuringly. "I'm not going to make fun of you silly. Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

She reached her hand out towards him. Chunji stared as if it was an alien object.

And very slowly, he reached out and took her hand as the tears were replaced with a guilty smile.

Three years later, Chunji and Myung Eun had become the best of friends. Everyone found it strange how two enemies could become so close within such a short time. For Chunji, Myung Eun became his shining light, the one he looked up to. He only allowed Myung Eun to call him Chanhee. Myung Eun suddenly held a special place in heart. Whenever they saw each other, their face would instantly brighten up. At that time, they were only just beginning to realise how much they meant to one another.

Myung Eun had changed the high and mighty prince Chunji to the lovely, warm boy Lee Chanhee that everybody loved. Day by day they grew closer and soon became an inseparable team. Wherever Myung Eun went, Chunji would follow. One was never seen without the other. That one simple action of reaching out to another forged them a friendship that was irreplacable.

Chunji stared at their graduation photo, his thumb caressing her face as tears slowly fell.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

With every good looking guy, there will always be a beautiful girl. For Chunji, that was Kim Jihyun. She was pretty, popular, and had the smile of an angel. Everywhere she went, heads turned to see her radiant smile. Whenever Chunji started gushing about Jihyun's perfection, Myung Eun would scoff and roll her eyes in disgust. "Yeah, she's an angel alright." Chunji would then proceed to playfully whack her on the head. "Don't talk about my Jihyun like that!" As Chunji had his sights set on Jihyun, similarly she wanted to be known as Chunji's girl. One day, Chunji finally plucked up the courage to confess. Jihyun, to Chunji's delight, obviously accepted. Word spread like fire with strong headwind. Everyone was talking about it.

Chunji rushed to Myung Eun, wanting to tell her the good news himself. "SHE ACCEPTED! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!" She meekly nodded. "Mmm, yeah that's great." Chunji stopped in the midst of his celebration. "Hey, what's wrong?" Myung Eun simply shook her head and smiled. "Nothing, I'm fine. And I'm really happy for you! Congratulations!"

As Chunji bent down to hug her, Myung Eun's smile faded and was replaced with an unreadable expression. Many many thoughts were racing through their minds at that moment. Despite his high, Chunji could still sense that something was wrong. But he lightly shrugged it off. After all, if it was something she didn't want to share, then he wouldn't force her.

Chunji and Jihyun were about to celebrate their one year anniversary. Chunji had planned many wonderful things for their big date. One tiny problem. Although he had meticulously set his plans in order...

He still hadn't asked Jihyun yet. So Chunji wanted to catch Jihyun after school. Since Myung Eun and Jihyun were in the same class, to Chunji it made things convenient. He could see his girlfriend and best friend at one shot. Seeing that they had already left class, Chunji texted Jihyun, asking her to meet him at their usual spot at the school gates.

Slowly Chunji made his way there, using his phone as a mirror to check his hair along the way. When he reached the school gates, Jihyun wasn't there. But that was normal. Jihyun was always late, making Chunji wait for her. Not that he minded. As he patiently waited and checked his hair for the upteenth time, Chunji heard a familiar voice pleading.

"Please stop. No! Don't do this I'm begging you! STOP! I already told you, Chanhee is yours. Just because I'm his friend doesn't mean I'm going to steal him away from you!"

Chunji's eyes widened in shock. Myung Eun? He briskly walked to where the voices were coming from when someone else's voice caused him to stop right where he was, feet rooted to the ground.

"You ! Don't think I'm stupid. Anyone can see your feelings for Chunji oppa. And why are only YOU allowed to call MY oppa Chanhee?!"

Jihyun? No no no! Chunji was completely stumped by what he just heard. His angelic Jihyun? No, it was impossible!

When he heard the real torture start. Myung Eun cried out in pain, in anger. For allowing herself to be bullied, for being unable to protect herself, for giving up this easily.

"HELP! SOMEBODY! ANYBODY!" Chunji jolted as if from a deep slumber and ran.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" he roared. Jihyun and her clique promptly stopped hitting, punching and kicking Myung Eun. "Ch-ch-chunji oppa!" Jihyun managed to stumble. Chunji was furious. "GET OUT OF MY SIGHT! WE'RE OVER JIHYUN."

Jihyun pouted and began to cry. Chunji shook his head in disgust and disappointment. "I will not tolerate any of you mistreating Myung Eun." Chunji winced as he finally focused his attention on Myung Eun. Blood and tears stained her shirt and face. She was still sobbing quietly, eyes fixed on the ground. Chunji knelt on the ground in front of Myung Eun. She waited for Jihyun and her clique to leave before slowly raising her head to meet Chunji's gaze. He remained silent for a few minutes. Speaking past the lump in his throat, he manage to force out. "How long?" Myung Eun did not reply. "How long have they been bullying you Myung Eun?!" Chunji raised his voice slightly and Myung Eun cried harder than before. "Since the beginning," she said between sobs. "I'm sorry!" Chunji hugged her fiercely and her hair soothingly. "It's okay. I'm here now. They won't be bothering you any more."

As Myung Eun cried even harder, she wished that she could tell Chunji everything. But some secrets stay the way they are.

It was a month after Chunji broke up with Jihyun. During that time, Chunji made sure that Myung Eun was within his line of sight. And when he heard the news that he was accepted by LOEN entertainment, Chunji could hardly contain his joy. He told Myung Eun right away. She was happy for him, and they celebrated. But somehow, it seemed like her smile counldn't reach her eyes.

Chunji was in Teen Top's dormitory. They were taking a break that day since they had just finished promotions for "Clap". Feeling bored, Chunji decided to pay Myung Eun a surprise. He went to her house only to find it empty. Chunji frowned and as he was about to leave, Myung Eun's neighbour stopped him. "Myung Eun is in the hospital." Just as Chunji was about to run off in alarm, she stopped him. "Myung Eun asked me to pass this to you." The lady smiled at him sadly when he took the envelope from her. Chunji was puzzled at her expression, but in his anxious state he dismissed it and simply thanked her and went back to Teen Top's dormitory. After he was accepted into LOEN, Chunji had spent less time with Myung Eun. Recently, he noticed that she sounded tired and out of breath when they talked on the phone, yet each time Myung Eun assured him that it was nothing. He was about to open the letter when the call from Myung Eun's mother came.

She was crying, her voice was shaking. "Chunji-ah... Myung Eun..." she stopped short and Chunji waited for her to go on.

"What is it Mrs Lee?"

What Chunji heard next stopped his heart.

"She's dead."

Chunji knelt down in front of her grave. It had only been a week. A week without his best friend. A week without the one he loved. He shook his head and laughed. Yes, how stupid of him not to realise earlier. How stupid of him to cause her so much pain. Chunji smoothed out Myung Eun's crumpled letter and read it again, the only piece of her he had left.

Dear Chanhee,

Yes I have left without telling you, and I'm sorry. Although I suppose there are many other things that I should apologise for. You were always there are for me. You were like my shield, blocking those hurtful comments that pierced like knives into my weak heart. Now that I think about it, we weren't even friends in the beginning. Lee Chanhee, you are my best and only friend. You have been so good to me, you have given me more than I deserve. But I could not bring myself to tell you this to your face.

I love you, more than just a brother or a friend. I fell in love with Lee Chanhee, the only one who touched my heart. I don't know how or when it happened. It seemed like my heart was yours all along. It was as if one day it hit me in the face. And I wanted to confess, but you told me about Jihyun. Was I that good at hiding my sadness? Don't be upset, I don't blame you for anything. If, at this moment you somehow do love me back, I'm sorry. We can't be together, not now not ever.

I'm dying. Six months ago, I was diagnosed with lymphatic cancer. I went for chemotherapy and for a period of time, it seemed like it worked. Then at my next medical, the doctors found that the cancer had spread to my bones. There was no chance for me. It was around the time you got accepted in LOEN. I didn't want to tell you, because I knew you would be upset. Yet, right now if I could go back and live my life again I wouldn't. Just having you in my life is enough. Even if the love you gave me was not what I felt for you.

Chanhee, you made me happier than I could have wished, and for that I thank you. You're a great friend, and any girl would be lucky to have you. For my sake, find that special girl, hold on to her and never let her go. I love you Chanhee.

Signed,

Myung Eun.

Chunji cried again. He wept like never before. For the loss of his best friend. The loss of his special girl. The loss of his one true love. "Don't you see Myung Eun, I can't find someone else. You are my special girl."

All of a sudden, the air grew colder. Chunji heard someone calling him and looked around. Her voice was faint, a mere whisper in the wind, but he was sure he heard it. "Myung Eun?" he said softly. Oh Lee Chanhee you must be delusional, he thought. When he heard her voice again. He spun around. It was as if he had materialised in front of her. She was no more than a spirit, a faint white image. She was smiling at him, she seemed to radiate with happiness despite her coldness. "Chanhee oppa, I see you've read my letter," she looked up at the sky, towards heaven. "You won't be able to see me soon. I will disappear like smoke." Myung Eun reached out her hand and held his.

She was cold. Cold as death.

Tears flowed down Chunji's cheeks. Myung Eun tried to wipe them away, but they froze, pieces of ice marking out the tracks of his tears. She was already starting to fade away. He heard her voice for the last time. "I love you."

It began to rain as he closed his eyes and let her words wash over him, wash away the pain so he could finally see the impression she left on his heart. And he whispered the words he had kept in his heart for so long.

"I love you too."

Hi :) wow it's been forever since I actually created the foreward. Well, it's done so drop comments if you wish. I'm currently in the midst of writing out my next fic but the foreward won't be up for ages. and by ages I do mean months. I'm such a slow updator you could literally drop dead waiting. Thanks for all those who waited for this oneshot. I probably won't write oneshots in the future, it's not exactly my style :)

Hope to see your wonderful comments ^^