"Because I love her so."

It's dark and you can't see. How long has it been? 2 hours? 3? You've been waiting in the dark, still in denial although you know. You know where she is. Who she's with. You know she still doesn't love you eventhough she's been on the floor, with her knees folded, begging for you to take her back everytime this happens. You've given her your all but it's just not enough. It's just not enough for her to tell you why she's doing this to you. Why she's holding you prisoner in her mind games. 

"You're dumb, Tiffany. How long are you going to let yourself being pushed around like this?" That's your friend, Jessica, who is obviously mad at you for obvious reasons. She's seen you like this for multiple times, tried to knock some sense into your head, but always end up letting you wet her clothes with hot tears and always tucking your aching limb back into bed. 

"Till she's done feeding off my soul, that's if I even have one anymore."

She obviously doesn't understand but she just keeps quiet because she knows when to speak and when not to speak. Sometimes you wonder how you coud fall in love with someone else but not Jessca. After all, she's pretty, she understands you well, she's smart, and she's your bestfriend. Right, she's your bestfriend. That's the reason why. But that person who you're desperately chasing around knows you well too. Oh trust me, she know you too well. Especially your weakness. Her. She's your kryptonite and she's using that to win you over, to make your heart beat fast everytime you see her, to make your stomach twist when she's near, to make you useless and hopeless when she's not around. She doesn't even have to try. You're drawn to her like any pin would be drawn to a magnet. You can't repel. She dominates every neurone in you and you submit right away. It has always been like that. It has always been an ultimatum with no conditions.

The night is so hard to get through without anyone in your bed. That's why you've been drowning your veins in alcohol. 

You're awake now and you could feel the weight on the other side of the bed, it's weight sinking in. You turn around and she's there sleeping. The only one that can make you and break you. 

Kim Taeyeon. 

Your heart aches and you remember vividly what you told Jessica before you knocked out. 

"Why, Tiffany? Why would you hurt yourself like this? Why would you let her do this to you over and over again? She obviously doesn't care."

It doesn't take you long to answer. You already know. You've always been aware and it has always been the same answer. 

"Because I love her so."