Final
Paradise
I've been here too long. I belong here.
Thy know I'm lunatic - insane.
People like me belong here, where we can't harm other humans.
No, I'm not even human. So they told me - human can't be like me. They told me I'm dangerous, that I shouldn't exist. Maybe they're right.
S e o u l 's m e n t a l a s y l u m 7 t h O c t o b e r , 5 . 4 9 a m
They think they know me. They think I'm just a lifeless body without soul. They think I don't know anything about world or what's
happening, that I don't see those disgusted or pitiful glances they threw on me.
happening, that I don't see those disgusted or pitiful glances they threw on me.
They're wrong, but maybe they're right.
I am only soulless shell without mind or soul. I'm still alive. I'm not dead, even they said I should be. I don't know. Maybe I don't want to exist, it really doesn't matter. I really don't know do I even exist. I can't do anything - or so they say.
The light green color of my room's wall is sickening. All I can do is stare at it since my hands are tied together. The straitjacket on me is tight enough to prevent me to moving my hands. The bandage around my ankles is thigt enough to prevent my blood flowing through my veins. All my limbs are numb, I can't feel my legs or hands.
The cloth in my mouth is enough to prevent me from screaming.
I don't know how long I've been here. Too long - maybe days, months, years? Maybe my whole life? But does it really matter? No. Nothing can bring life back to this body I'm ruling. I don't even know was there ever such a thing as life in me. I don't really care.
I fell backwards. My back hit the cold and hard fabric of my bed. I stared at the ceiling without thinking anything. What could I even think? There's nothing.
How I feel? I don't feel anything. I don't feel happiness, I don't feel sadness, not hope, pain, nothing. I can't feel the burning in my eyes when I've been staring at the ceiling too long.
I don't feel the pain when someone is ripping my eyes off of my skull. I can't hear the shouts that tells the person on me to stop.
"Taemin!"
See, I'm not the only one. Maybe they should let us to destroy each other. Then we shouldn't be such a bother.
I can't feel the pain in my arms as someone is pulling me up from my bed. I can't see anything nor feel the pain. I can't feel my legs moving, I can't feel the little wind on my face as I'm walking. I can barely hear a voice saying 'Let's start' before they make me stop. I can't see anything but once in a lifetime I can feel something - I feel like I'm going to vanish. I feel like everything around me is disappearing.
I feel pain.
And then...
Nothing.
In my dream I was in Key's form and Taemin tried to rip my eyes off. Not so literally, but it felt dramatic.
Listening A-JAX's 'Never Let Go'.
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