Tao's POV

I have a girlfriend. I'm surprised myself, because believe it or not she's the first girl I've ever dated and the first one to go stable with. 
I'm new to the boyfriend-girlfriend thing so I don't really know what to do. Part of me was glad that (y/n) confessed first but a part of me was disappointed, For god's sake I'm the guy here and I didn't make any move. Yes I like her.. I like her ever since. I grew up with her. I saw how perfect she was and I fell inlove with her, but I saw her imperfections and that made me love her even more. As i said before I was new to this so what I did was..
-Flashback-
I reached for my phone in my pocket and called someone.
"Hello Chelsea?"
"Hey? what do you want?" Chelsea answered sounding annoyed on the other line
"I need you to help me.. Come here please." I pleaded
"Jeez! you and your love problems. When and where?" 
"Yes! thanks! Uuh now would be a good time, I'm at myeongdong."
"K" then she hung up
"Tsk! aish that girl" I looked at my phone and smiled . Thank God she agreed.
-end-
Yeah I asked for help. Yes I asked advices and help from girls because 
girls know what girls want. I would call or meet them even when I'm with (y/n) and unintentionally neglected her. I even say hurtful words, but she's still with me. Do I really deserve her?

I asked for help and they all gave me the same answer "If you can't tell her how you feel. Just give her gifts because action speaks louder than words" Aish Girls..Oh well girls are girls we can't change the fact that they're very cheesy and corny in a way, but I find it cute especially when (y/n) does those corny and cheesy stuff. She always says that she loves me so much and the way she blushes after saying those words, damn I go mute. She's really something, she literally makes my mouth dry and takes away the words I'm supposed to say, so I just look away and and secretly smile.
Anyway, so yeah I followed the girls' advices and I gave her gifts. I gave her dolls, and in those dolls I installed recorders and recorded myself saying "I love you."  by now I already gave her 200 dolls. I never failed to give her one everyday.
Even on the crappiest day where I would get scolded by my manager on my part-time job, I still gave her a doll, but sometimes my anger gets the best of me and let it out on her. Like for example:
-Flash back"-

Her:Um, Tao, I--
Me:  What…don’t drag, just say it already..
Her: I love you.
Me: *oh crap what will i say asdfghjjkl* you--um.. Uuuh-, just take this doll and go home.
-end-
I curse that day and my manager. -.-

(y/n)'s birthday
It's her birthday today. I wanted to surprise her. I went to my part time job to earn and buy her a gift .After my job, I went to the mall to find her something special for her 15th birthday. I saw a doll "Ha! I think you'll be a great gift." I was so occupied that day that I lost track of time. I went home and took a quick nap, I didn't even bother looking at my watch and my phone. I was so tired... suddenly I had the urge to pee. I groaned and looked at my phone and my eyes widened when I realized something.."Oh shh...oh shhiizz!! It's already 1:45am!! and 20 missed calls from her!!! " the peeing urge I felt was now long gone because I was panicking. "darn! darn ! darn!" I quickly picked up the doll and ran as fast as I could to go to (y/n)'s place.
I called her and told her to come out.
I calmed myself down and then I heard the door crack open and then I saw an angel right before me. I snapped myself back to reality and

Her: Taooooo~

Me: Here…take this..

I handed her the doll.

Her: What’s this?
Me: I didn’t give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I’m going home now, bye.

My mind is rumbling right noooow! heeelp! I don't even remember why I'm here. Stupid panic!!

Her: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Me: Today? Huh?

I don't know what to say anymore so I turned  around and walked away like nothing had happen.Then She shouted… “Wait!!”
Me:You have something to say?

Wth Tao! Stupid stupid! I scolded myself in my head.

Her: Tell me, tell me you love me…

Oh shizz!

Me: What?!

Again I mentally slapped myself.

Her: Tell me

I felt myself stiffen when she hugged me. I don't know what to say. I felt pressured. I couldn't find the right words and then suddenly I I had the urge to kill myself when I heared myself suddenly say this words..
“I don’t want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else.”
After saying those I felt regret rushing all over me when I saw her fell on the ground and cry. I couldn't do anything. I didn't know what to do..I just...ran off.

After that day. I wanted to call her and say sorry but something is stopping me and i don't even know what. I think I just didn't have the courage to do so. Since I didn't have a face to show I just continued giving her dolls by leaving it at the front door of her house and it has been a months since I've been doing that and so on..

The day came, the 486th day.. I  decided that I should really do something. I don't want us to end just because of my wrong choice of words. VERY wrong words. 

I asked one of the girls who helped me before to help me again.
"You think she'll accept me again?" I asked Stacy
"I'm sure she will." she smiled and I smiled too while looking at the doll and touched the doll's face. It's the biggest and most beautiful doll I've bought. I really hope she'll love this.

I called her telling her to come out and go to the bus stop near her house. She said yes but there was something about her voice.. I couldn't tell if it was sadness or anger.

I waited at the bus stop for her holding the doll and people were giving me weird looks but I ignored them.

Then I saw her..
I calmed myself down..

Me: (y/n)-ah, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
 
I handed her the doll.. but I couldn't explain her expression, but I knew I was hurt by it.
Her: I don’t need it.

I felt my world crushing..

Me: What….why…

I felt really..sad and ..hurt.. I felt like dying when she grabbed the doll and threw it on the road..

Her: I don’t need this doll, I don’t need it anymore!! I don’t want to see a person like you again!

In my head I was chanting "please stop..Please stop..Just stop" over and over again.. I want to cry.

“I’m sorry” I apologized in a tiny voice, I didn't care anymore if my voice was cracking, before I knew it I was walking over to the road to pick up the doll…

"You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!" I heard her shout.. I can't just throw it. 

I just  ignored her and went to pick the doll. 

Then I heard a loud honking sound over and over. I didn't bother looking.

“TAO!! Move! Move away!” (y/n) shouted… i heard her but I just wanted to pick up the doll so I squatted down and picked up the doll.
“TAO!, move!” That's the last thing I knew every memory of me and (y/n) came running back into my head the times when we still friends, when she first confessed, when I asked her to be my girlfriend, when i looked for a part time job to earn and buy her the dolls, when I made up excuses so I can earn more money to buy her more dolls, when I shouted at her, when I saw her fall and cry. Then another memory flashed back into me, the time when I was recording my own voice in the recorder for the 486th doll--
-Flashback-
I smiled to myself and let out a deep breathe "This is it.." 
I pressed on the record botton "(y/n)-ah …Do you know what today is? We’ve been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn’t say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that I love you. EVERYDAY~ till I die. (y/n)-ah. SARANGHAE. WO AI NI . I LOVE YOU.” 
I smiled in satisfaction and switch the recorder off.
-End-
I couldn't move or open my eyes. The last words in my mind was "I'm sorry (y/n). I hope you will forgive me.. I love you. Please take care." Then everything went black.

THE END.

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