I feel like I have to say this to all the E.L.F's in this world. I'm sorry, I really am. You really don't know how it feels like to be an horrible fangirl but I have to. My love for Kim Kibum is making me that way. I have a strong feeling that I will never be able to look Super Junior's members in the eyes. I miss every single memory with Kibum so much, I can't lie to myself. I can't deny my feelings for Super Junior all 13. I would like to quote one unknown person on the internet: “Ki Bum will never ever going back to Suju. There will be no more 13elive.” In this case I will say this: “As long as Kibum is not considered as Super Junior’s member either believed he will come back, I will refuse to call myself a fan.”  I really regret all the times I refused to learn about other members, when I refused to listen to their new songs, when I said I’ll never love any of them either them together like I love Kibum, but I DO NOT regret loving him. Don’t get me wrong I don’t insult others from Suju or I’m trying to make you accept me as a fan, I just want to apologize for being like this, for ignoring their amazing work for one person. No matter what I will believe in every one of them, and I will wait for Kibum because he promised. He promised he will be back and I will wait. If I can have him I don’t need anything else. I could start loving them years ago when I found out about them, but I didn’t, I couldn’t. I admire Leeteuk’s really hard work and all the member’s tears and smiles, but try to imagine all of you whose bias is still in Super Junior what would be like to you if your bias just one day left saying he will be back and then doesn’t appear in 5 years. Would you be hurt, would you cry? I thought so. Thank you for understanding.