I Kissed Himchan
I Kissed HimchanI tried to cry in silence. Heaving, I flipped across my sheets feeling the hot tears carve trails down my cheeks. Simply, it hurt. Earlier at the sun’s peak, melting ice claimed me a fool as I slid and fell to my demise; my situation currently. I caught myself from the fall, and to my luck not a soul saw, but that didn’t erase the fact that I landed on my two outer fingers. I heard them crack almost like being underneath a vice grip,
*crack*
I shivered at the thought.
I didn’t want to cause commotion; we were preparing for our comeback for Oneshot; everyone’s work ethic was stronger than ever before. You could feel the intensity in the practice room. If we had to postpone our comeback because of my stupid – stupid mistake… God… I couldn’t even bear the thought.
So… I tried to endure the pain, which left me crying alone in mine and Yongguk’s shared bedroom. I roughly bit down on my lip suppressing the need to scream bloody mercy. My fist throbbed and throbbed and throbbed; I must have broken it. God Himchan… so stupid!
Sleep and I didn’t cross paths, while agony was my best friend. The late night hours passed, the owls hooting, mocking me.
The sky gradually transformed into a light misty blue with hints of pink; the wakeup call for Bang Yongguk, but for me as well.
His phone lit up, lighting up the entire room as it blared rap from its speakers. The bass was heavy mimicking the throbbing of my hand.
I had to fake it. I couldn’t let anyone know of my injury. I had to play it off like any other morning, which meant cooking breakfast.
See I was the only one in the house who could cook, and with my “motherly instincts” (as the boys called it) I had been officially dubbed “eomma” of B.A.P. But no, I didn’t mind it… only because… of... h-him. Yongguk… was named “appa” and though our relationship was just a joke to the boys, I wanted it to be reality.
“Himmie~” Yongguk hummed wrapping those godly muscular arms around me. Oh god I wish I could have enjoyed it more as he laid his head on my shoulder. However, I flinched at his touch, feeling sweat drip down my forehead as I shakily flipped the eggs in the pan.
“Himchan?” His voice got deeper showing concern from my response or lack thereof.
I cursed myself for already showing my injury.
In one swift turn he turned me around and his face instantly mutated into…
“You okay? You didn’t sleep did you?”
I shook my head in response, scared to hear my voice; not knowing if I could make any other noise than a scream or a cry.
“GOOOD MORNING!!!” Zelo sang coming into the room, I cringed at the loud sound.
“ZELO!” Yongguk scolded, “It’s too ing early for that ” He shifted his attention back to me, “Go back to sleep, I’ll take care of breakfast.”
“But-” I croaked.
“Hyung! What’s wrong?” Zelo took both my shoulders into his large bony hands shaking me around.
“YAH!” Yongguk lightly pushed the maknae off me.
“Gukkie don’t be so mean” I tried to defend the baby as well as I could.
“Yeah hyung don’t be so mean to me” Zelo stuck out his tongue to Yongguk.
The oldest growled but in turn looked at me, “Himmie go get some rest”
I couldn’t argue with him. I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep more before practice, but it was the thought of not having to worry about hiding my secret that gave me comfort.
After the eventful morning, I found myself facing my next issue; dance practice. There was one move in particular I was concerned about… the “push up” move. I… had no idea how I was going to execute it. I had been thinking about it all morning, but I had no solutions. Not to mention I was still exhausted from no sleep the night prior.
“Jonguppie stop tickling me!” Zelo squealed in the dance room.
Zelo and Jongup were just downright adorable playing with each other on the floor.
“Will you two just already?” Daehyun laughed.
The two youngest instantly retracted their hold from each other and stood in pure tomato red blush hands behind their backs.
I felt pity for the two, it was so obvious their feelings towards each other, but they were so clueless and innocent. Nothing would ever happen, and I didn’t have the energy currently to help them out.
I stood like stone yawning as Yongguk came up behind me, “You should sit this one out.”
“I-I’m fine Gukkie. I promise.”
By the look on his face, I could tell he wasn’t convinced, but what for whatever reason he let me dance. That was probably the biggest mistake on both of our parts.
Minutes later…
“HIMCHAN!” 5 voices screamed in unison. I could barely hear them as they were drowned out by own screams. I clutched my fist bringing it into my chest, knees following. Several hands were placed on various parts of my body
I cracked open my eyes; pupils pushing through tears. I saw Yongguk staring back at me, his forehead creased with worry.
“Himchan-ah, What’s wrong!?”
I shook my head at him as I wiped my tears the pain subsiding into a liveable pain. I began to push myself up when I felt Yongguk’s entire body wrap around me supporting my effort.
“Don’t move” he ordered picking me up bridal style.
I felt my cheeks warm up trying my hardest to ignore the throbbing hand. I wanted to enjoy the moment as much as I could.
“I-I’m f-fine Gukkie, I just - hit something at a wrong angle” I lied mid hiccup.
“There’s something you’re not telling me” He said sitting down with me in the corner of the room placing me in his lap, “All night I heard you tossing and turning, you didn’t get sleep, now this, not to mention last night before bed you were actin weird. Tell me what’s wrong”
“N-nothing”
“Yahhh…” he growled, “Trust me”
I shook my head and in response he placed me next to him on the floor. The warmth I once felt was now gone. I felt pathetic as I realized I had just whined jutting out my bottom lip. Yongguk chuckled.
“Yah~ get some sleep” he wiped my final tears with his thumb his deep voice a lullaby.
I stared at him confused. How was I supposed to get sleep in the dance room? Just when all my questions were unanswered, Yongguk pulled me back into his clutches and leaned back slightly against the wall giving the perfect most comforting angle. He was proposing I use him as a pillow.
“Bb-ang…” I whispered shyly.
“Get some sleep” he ordered.
From the tone in his voice, I could tell there was no arguing. He had that “I’m the leader” tone (or I like to refer to it as the appa tone).
At first I felt shy but after several seconds Yongguk’s body was even more and more comfortable. I felt Yongguk’s hands slide around my waist underneath my shirt and around my stomach; his fingers interlocking. My breath hitched, and I let out a, much embarrassing on my part, airy moan. My head fell back onto his shoulder as I felt his slight scruff scratch against my skin. God… it felt good.
I could hear him chuckle in my ear. My face grew red, and I elbowed him in the gut for making me embarrassing.
His hearty laugh filled the room as I shut my eyes; my pain in my hand almost unnoticeable.
Zelo’s POV
“Hyung” I whispered to Jonguppie hyung.
He looked at me questioningly.
I pointed to the two eldest in the group as his head followed my finger and instantly he smiled. I felt my face warm up after seeing his white teeth shine through his lips.
He turned around and tapped Youngjae and Daehyun as the scene replayed.
“I really wish appa and eomma were together” I whined.
“By the looks of it they are” Youngjae giggled.
“I think they would say something” Jonguppie reasoned.
Just then Yongguk appa looked up at us and I knew we were dead.
“YAH! STOP STARING AND GET BACK TO WORK!” he yelled, and I heard Himchan eomma giggle.
The four us instantly straightened up and went back to dancing.
Yongguk’s POV
Several minutes went by when I felt Himchan’s breath even; he fell asleep.
My hands were still wrapped underneath his shirt, his skin so smooth, his stomach so flat. I looked down and couldn’t help but admire his perfect sculpture. He was so… god damn appealing; beautiful. The moment I first laid eyes on this boy I knew I was ed…
I couldn’t lie I was worried about him. He looked so peaceful now, but all day he had this constant look of… distress slapped across his face. He’d been in pain, and he wouldn’t tell me what it was. What bothered me even more was he didn’t have enough trust in me to tell me.
After practice, I didn’t have the heart to wake up the sleeping beauty so I opted to carry him to the van. I placed him with me on the backseat, while I let his limp head lay on my shoulder as comfort. I couldn’t get this eating grin off my face like I was Himchan’s boyfriend. And the way the other 4 stared at us… hah…
The ride home was in complete silence, but by my orders, I didn’t want them to wake up Himchan.
We hit a bump in the rode and Himchan instantly clung to me, “Gukkie” he whimpered half-conscious half in an alternate reality. I swung my arm around him and took him into my embrace. He grabbed my thigh for support when I saw it… his hand… I observed it for a second. It was puffy, his long thin bony fingers had puffed up into blue balloons; ready to pop at any second.
The van came to a halt.
I carefully picked up his hand to take a closer look when I heard him gasp. Switching my focus to the ulzzang, his eyes were opened wide as he clutched his hand away from me. The van door opened at the worst timing as he climbed over me and rushed into the house.
“HIMCHAN!” I roared running after him.
“Hyung?!” I heard Zelo yell in concern?
I let the front door swing open wide as I tried to look for him. His hand was what has been hurting him this whole time. By the looks of it, it’s broken.
“HIMCHAN! GET THE OUT HERE!”
“Hyung what’s wrong!? The other four came into the front door clueless.
I completely ignored their questions as I heard running water in the bathroom. I had never run faster. The door to the bathroom was locked, but that didn’t stop me. I busted the lock open out of pure worry for Himchan. He swung around from the sink, eyes drenched in tears as he held his hand. His face showed an expression of absolute fear.
“Himchan…”
He turned around covering himself, but I countered by wrapping my longer than his arms around his body taking a look at his fist.
“Yong-GUUUK!” he screamed after I clenched his hand.
My assumptions were correct, Himchan had broken his hand or at least some part of it.
“Let me see” I ordered.
“Ani, he cried kneeling to the ground.
“Baby, let me see” I flinched at the use of ‘baby’ that had accidentally slipped out.
Himchan looked at me from the ground with those big beautiful eyes and surrendered his hand.
By now there was an entourage outside the bathroom.
“Bbang… it’s fine I can pull through for the comeback”
Then it all really did click. He didn’t want to halt our comeback because of his hand, that’s why he didn’t trust me. He planned on keeping this a secret.
“Himchan… your hand is broken. I’m not gonna let you perform in this condition.”
He stared at me not giving up, “Please Bbang PLEASE! I’ve worked so hard! We all have!” his hysteric cries filled the bathroom as he collapsed entirely on the floor, “please Bb-bbang!”
My heart shattered across the floor; fragile glass. I couldn’t handle seeing Himchan this upset it was the cruelest form of punishment, but I had to pull through.
I kneeled down to him and wrapped my arms around him and he adhered to me like suction to glass.
“Himmie” I whispered, “I’m not going to let you perform. Your injury could get worse and it already looks bad as it is. We need to get you to a doctor”
Several hours later… a lot had happened. We had gotten to the doctor, all of B.A.P and our manager. Himchan had protested the entire way letting his cries be heard by hundreds.
They performed a cat scan, and the result… well the result was he needed surgery. They said it was a minor surgery, but it was surgery nonetheless. The doctor said it was best to perform the surgery as soon as possible so they were prepping for it now.
It was a lot to process within the short amount of period of time. Himchan… Himchan was terrified. He had stayed quiet ever since they said the word “surgery”. I stayed with him in the prep room while the other four boys watched through the glass window in the hallway.
“G-gukkie I—I’m scared” his voice cracked as tears streamed down his face.
I walked over to him holding his good hand, “You’ll be fine”.
He covered his face as his body began to shake releasing tears.
I needed to do something to calm him down, I had to.
I peeled his hands away from his face, letting our faces inch closer together; our hot breath intertwining.
“I’m sorry sir but you’re going to have to leave” one of the nurses said.
The time was now. I dove into those alluring bow shaped pink lips.
God… they tasted sweeter than I ever imagined. Sparks literally flew as I lingered into the kiss. I heard his slight moan making me want more, but I knew it was time to go.
“You will be fine. Trust me” I whispered as I broke the connection, Himchan’s eyes wide nodding.
I turned heel towards the door, but before I did. I saw a pleased grin emerge from Himchan’s once sad face. I felt my own grin take over my face as I walked outside to sit next to Zelo.
He was fiddling with his fingers smiling shyly, “Appa kissed eomma…”
“Yes appa did” I reiterated, “Yes appa did.”
That smile never left my face.
I kissed Himchan. I kissed… Himchan.
Thanks for reading everyone! Let me know what you thought! And if you're interested I'm currently writing a chaptered Banghim fic! Link below!
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