This is a story of a love untold.

Cho Kyuhyun walked through the corridors of his campus building. He ran his fingers on its textured walls. It’d been four years, and he grew attached to these walls eventually. They were the only ones that knew about his obsession, his strive, his cowardice, his love towards the one he thought to be his other half. These walls witnessed his mental break down when he was disappointed. These walls offered him protection to cover him whenever he was quenching his thirst for a sight of his love. These walls had been a very good friend to him.

But as he had decided, like everything related to that person, these walls had to go.

Kyuhyun’s fingers curled into a fist as he walked faster to his destination. He was determined to get down with it as soon as possible. He didn’t think he would be able to hold any more torture. But the second he saw that person, standing and talking casually to a group of girls, he nearly lost his guts.

His heart ached, but he kept his steps steady. It’s time.

“Siwon...” he called.

The guy turned to him and flashed him a bright dimpled smile.

“Oh hey Kyu!”

Kyuhyun felt his knees trembled. He felt dizzy seeing the vibrant smile. His heart almost faltered at the sight. But he finally managed to gain his compsure back.

“Happy graduation.” Kyuhyun said with a forced smile, “These are for you.”

Siwon looked puzzled at the small package shoved into his hands, but he took it nonetheless.

“Uh.. Thanks, I guess.” He gave Kyuhyun another smile. “You really shouldn’t have. Now I feel bad for not preparing anything for you.”

Kyuhyun shook his head firmly and returned the smile.

“No, don’t worry about that. It’s nothing, really.” He said with a clear hint of sadness in his eyes, “Well then. Good bye, Siwon.”

Kyuhyun brought his hands up and waved stiffly. The aura is getting too awkward for anyone to handle. So Kyuhyun just turned his heels around and walked as fast as he could, as far away as he could, away from a dumbstrucked Siwon, staring blankly at Kyuhyun’s disappearing figure in the distant.

~*~

It was a sunny Tuesday afternoon, at approximately 4:35 pm, exactly 5 minutes late from the planned time, a lovely elegant lady walked into the lounge on the 2nd floor of Seoul’s most prestigious hotel. Women are always fashionably late. She scanned through the stylish crowd and her eyes turned bright when she spot her prey.

Sat on a comfortably sofa by the far corner of the lounge, a glass of espresso on one hand and the world’s newest and most sophisticated gadget on the other hand, was Choi Siwon. Everything about the guy was high-class, handsome, powerful. No wonder he was one of the best young enterpreneur in the country. Tailored suits, designer shoes, Greek God face, sculpted body, smart brain, all in all a perfect target.

“Siwon-ssi?” The lady asked with her sweet voice.

“Ah, YeonRin-ssi. I’m glad you can make it.” Siwon said then offered her a seat.

YeonRin settled on the sofa opposing Siwon, batting her long lashes a few times as her way of saying thanks.

“I’m sorry I’m a little bit late.” She said.

Siwon smiled.

“So, I guess we better get down with this. Your parents told you to come and meet me here, is that correct?” Siwon went straight to the point.

YeonRin nodded.

“Well, my parents wished that I would take you to be my wife.” Siwon continued.

YeonRin blushed. She didn’t expect the well-mannered Choi Siwon, a prince in Seoul’s high society, would be so blunt like this.

“It will not work between us.” Siwon stated.

“What?” YeonRin snapped and almost choked a breath.

“I say we stop here and make it easy for all of us.” Siwon said coldly.

“But....” YeonRin stuttered, “.... Why?”

Siwon took a sip of his espresso and finished it in one go.

“First of all, you’re late.” He started.

“Just barely! It’s not even 5 minutes I guarantee.” YeonRin argued, but Siwon only smiled.

“Still late nonetheless.” Siwon stated, “I’m an extreme maniac for punctuation, YeonRin-ssi. I have a really bad experience about being late, and it’s the thing that I regret the most in my life. So no, I can’t tolerate being late, however little it might be.”

“I...” YeonRin seemed to be lost for words, or she was just a smart girl who knew when to give up, “So is there any other reasons?”

Siwon chuckled.

“Just between you and I,” Siwon leaned over the slick wooden coffee table  separating him and YeonRin, “you’re not my type. If you know what I mean.”

YeonRin frowned at first, but when Siwon added a meaningful wink at the end of his sentence, smile started forming on her pretty lips.

“Oh...” she whispered understandingly, “I guess you are taken?”

“Sort of.” Siwon smiled at the smart and fast response of the lady currently sitting gracefully in front of him.

“Well then, there’s nothing to be embarrased about now. I understand that I will never win against him. May I know who this lucky fellow is, Siwon-ssi?” YeonRin asked.

“I prefer not to tell. Not that I’m trying an illicit way to hide him, or myself in this case.”

“You do not need to explain yourself to me, Siwon-ssi. I find it less... appealing.” Then she giggled cutely, then she continued.

“Well, I think I better go now. It’s been nice talking to you, Siwon-ssi. It would be lovely if we can be friends.” She said as she offered him her manicured hand.

Siwon took it with a relieved feeling.

“Likewise, YeonRin-ssi. Likewise. You’re by far the smartest lady I have encountered, and it would benefit me a good deal to have a friend like you.”

YeonRin couldn’t suppress her laughter now.

“Don’t do that ever again, Siwon-ssi. People might misinterpret.” She said then excused herself to leave.

Siwon watched in awe as YeonRin was walking away. He wished people were as wise as she was, he wished people were as understanding as he was. His life would have been a lot easier. They would see that it’s not a pretty, rich educated wife that he wanted.. His heart longed for someone and and that one alone.

~*~

Siwon walked went home to his luxurious bachelor pad right after the meeting with Min YeonRin, daughter of the Minister of Finance and close friend of his father. He went directly into his bedroom, like how he always do after a successfully failed matchmaking.

He tossed his Armani suit on the couch,  pulled his Braun Buffel tie loose, his white dress shirt so he could breath freely, and dropped his large built on the king-sized bed. He was drifting off to sleep when his phone vibrated in his side pocket.

It was his mother, asking about his so-called date. He scoffed and typed a simple “Unsuccessful” before sending the message and turning off his phone. He really couldn’t afford more disturbance tonight.

Siwon rolled over to put his phone on the nightstand. He then pulled out a thin chain of Platinum from under his shirt and fished out a set of keys dangling on its end. He scooted over the bottom drawer of the nightstand, opened it with the first key, and took out a medium sized black velvet box.

He sat on the edge of the bed and unlocked the box with the other, smaller key.

That box was his past. It contained the memory he regretted the most but never wanted to forget. Inside the box was countless pictures of him and his childhood friend, Kyuhyun. He took the pictures out and took something on the base of the box.

It was a letter, pressed into a glass frame, written by Kyuhyun, given to him on their graduation day 10 years ago.

Dear Siwon,

My dear Siwon, there are a thousand things I wish to tell you, I wish you would know. But those thousand things only lead up to one simple thing,

I love you.

Should I tell you how it started?

I don’t even know when or how it started. It could be that time on my first day of pre-school when you offered me your friendship. Or it could be that day in elementary school when you hugged me under the rain. It could also be the day in my 13th birthday when you kissed my cheeks. I really don’t know. But everyday I woke up I know,

I have fallen in love with you.

And I’m really sorry...

It hurts too much to be in love like this. I can’t look at your face without wanting to kiss you. I can’t look into your eyes without wanting to touch you. And I can’t stand looking at you with somebody else. But I also can’t tell you how much I love you. That would be really wrong, would it?

That’s why I have decided.

I have to go away from you, my love... Because the more I love, the more I cannot stand the pain..

Please forgive me for loving you without expressing it...

This may not be the end, but the end starts here. Have a good life, Siwon... I can’t be with you anymore, but I wish you a wonderful life. Happy graduation and....

Goodbye, my love...

-Kyuhyun-

There was always this specific time of day when Siwon would crouched over his black velvet box and cried reading Kyuhyun’s letter, cursing at how stupid he was, how stupid they both were. He would curse at Kyuhyun for disappearing on him like that. He would curse himself for taking Kyuhyun for granted. And then he would cry some more.

But this time is one of the rare ones when instead of weeping like a child, Siwon decided to grab his guitar and write a song instead, a mournful lament for his long lost love.a

Finally, I sing to you

The feelings I haven’t expressed before

This is a heart-aching song,

But I finally sing to you...

More than me... More than me...

You trusted me

You were always worried about me, even more than I did

That is who you are

I know, yet I couldn’t express myself

My love, my love, my love...

The more I love, the more I cannot stand the pain

So long, so long, goodbye...

Please forgive me for loving you without expressing it

Sorry... I was sorry that I pretended to not know

Now I could only dream for the day

I could stand in front of you coolly

Really, I am a bad person

I will remain in you like a scar

My love, my love, my love...

The more I love, the more I cannot stand the pain

So long, so long, goodbye...

Please forgive me for loving you without expressing it

When you walked alone

When you felt sad and cried alone...

How much do you hate me who couldn’t be be by your side?

Please don’t cry...

It will never again

I hope you could smile with someone else

Someone better than me

My love, my love, my love...

I will no longer be able to breath with you, but...

So long, so long, goodbye

Even if we’re alone, we can be together...

My love, my love, my love

The more I feel the pain, the more I cannot leave you

So long, so long, goodbye...

I’m sorry for this love, that cannot be spoken from the start...

Goodbye my love...

~*~

Siwon cried himself to sleep last night. And in between his unsteady breath he kept muttering:

‘Kyuhyun... come back to me...’