“I’m sorry, miss, but we can’t release that information to just anyone. It’s not that I don’t believe you, but we’ve had too many people try this sort of thing before who have no legitimate connection to Mr.Lee.”

I take back the note with a sigh, giving the secretary a sad but understanding smile. I hadn’t really been expecting anything else. “It’s all right. Thank you.”

    It hadn’t taken much to look up and find the agency Joon was with and its address. It had however, taken me two whole days since we’d landed in Seoul to work up my courage to actually go. Now, I’d found exactly what I’d been afraid of.

    I read the note for the thousandth time as I turn to walk slowly out of the J Tunes lobby, my mind blanking as I try to think of some other way to meet him. From my research, it sounded like an impossible task with how busy he is. I bet he’s not feeling well; Joon hates being rushed. I feel my mouth quirk in a half-smile as I remember the scowl Joon would get when he got frustrated and how one of my ridiculously corny jokes would wipe it away completely.

Lost in my memory of his laugh, I accidentally bump into someone, making me drop his note. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. Are you all right?” the young man asks with concern, pushing some of his dark hair from his face.

“I’m fine. I’m really sorry,” I apologize again, giving him an apologetic smile.

His companion, another boy with chestnut hair and large puppy eyes, notices Joon’s note and bends down to pick it up. His eyes briefly scan it before widening.

Tugging on the first boy’s sleeve, he says in Korean, “Cheondung, this is Joon hyung’s handwriting.”

“What?” The boy I bumped into leans closer to look it over.

“Why do you think she’d have this?”

“It was his goodbye to me since he didn’t get to do it in person,” I explain, switching to Korean as well. If they’re close enough to Joon to call him ‘hyung,’ maybe they can help me.

They both raise their eyebrows in surprise.

“Good-bye?” the second boy asks.

I nod. “When he left America after filming ‘Ninja Assassin.”

The first boy glances at the note again before looking back at me with growing understanding. “You’re June?”

“Yes.”

They share a look I don’t understand before nodding at each other.

“You came here to see Joon hyung.”

I nod again. “But the secretary said I can’t. She won’t even tell me where he is or how I can get a hold of him.”

A friendly smile blossoms across his face. “We’ll do even better than that. I’m Cheondung, by the way, and this is Mir.”

“Hi!” Mir says cheerily, waving. “It’s kinda funny that you and Joon hyung have the same name, isn’t it?”

    I nod, offering him a smile back as their names click in my memory as members of Joon’s group. I think about asking for the note back but Cheondung tucks it into his jacket pocket and I decide not to bother. Mir steers me back the way I had just come, keeping me between him and Cheondung as we pass the secretary with a nod.

As we walk through our third hallway, a door on our left opens.

“Yah! Where have you two been?” a tall man with panda eyes and puffy lips asks in a playful growl. He stops short when he sees me sandwiched between the two of them. “And who is this?”

“Who’s who?” Another, slightly shorter man pops his head around the door. “Oh. Is she one of your friends, Cheondung?”

Cheondung shakes his head. “June, this is Seungho and G.O. Guys, this is June. She’s here for Joon hyung. Do you know if he’s still here?”

Seungho and G.O share a similar look Cheondung and Mir did earlier, making me wonder if these guys have some kind of telepathy.

“Last time I checked, he was still in the lower practice room. I don’t know if he’s left yet though,” Seungho says slowly, watching me with unreadable eyes.

I shift my feet, a little unnerved by his examination.

“I’ll take her down there and be back in second,” Cheondung replies, already starting to walk away.

“Not so fast,” I hear Seungho say as he catches Mir by the collar when he tries to follow.

“But, hyung...” Mir whines, the rest of what he’s saying cut off as we round a corner.

When we get further away, I cough and ask the one thing I’m both dying and afraid to know. “Cheondung-ssi...since it seems you all kind of know me....does that mean Joon remembers me?”

“You’ll have to see for yourself,” he answers enigmatically.

I keep silent after that, too nervous to make conversation.

    Finally, Cheondung stops in front of a thick wood door and peeks through its small glass window which I’m too short to reach. With a satisfied look, he opens the door. The heavy beat of ‘This is War’ streams out. I glance at Cheondung, who nods and motions for me to go in. He closes the door behind me and leans against the wall, just watching. I force myself to follow his lead although my body is literally shaking from wanting to run and embrace Joon.

    The déjà vu of the moment is making it hard to breathe. He’s forgone a shirt again in the heat of practice, allowing me a glimpse of highly defined muscles. His face is more refined as well, but carries the same concentration as he moves, perfectly executing the choreography. Thank goodness his hair is grown out; I actually cried when they shaved it all off.

“Joon hyung. There’s someone here to see you.”

Cheondung’s voice startles me, as does my realization that the music’s stopped. I feel my heart beat kick up a notch when Joon turns to look at us.

“Oh, annyeonghasaeyo,” he greets us, hurriedly crossing the floor to slip on a black tank top. “What’s up?”

“She’s here to see you, hyung.”

“Really?” Joon glances at me in confusion before he offers a somewhat stiff smile. “I’m very sorry, but I really can’t take up any more projects just now. Maybe you can talk with my manager and try to arrange for something later.”

    My heart makes the split second decision to live in my stomach as I duck my head. I must’ve been mistaken. He doesn’t remember me. Only Cheondung’s presence stops me from bolting from the room. I’ve already embarrassed myself enough today.

“Hyung, take a look at this first,” Cheondung says, handing him my note. With a wink at me, he quickly makes his exit.

My gaze flicks back to Joon, who’s reading the note with a frown.

He glances at my face, back to the note, an expression of disbelief slowly spreading across his face. Stepping closer, he raises a hand to touch my face, but stops himself. Whispering, he says, “June...is it really you?”

“You’re looking good, Sunny oppa,” I reply quietly, my voice trembling.

    Joon stares at me before suddenly jerking me into his arms and burying his face in my neck. I squeeze my eyes shut and hug him back as relief floods through me. That relief quickly becomes concern when I feel him shaking.

“Oppa? What’s wrong?” I ask, trying to pull back, but he doesn’t let me.

“Stay still...just for a few minutes...please,” he asks in a muffled voice. “Please...”

    Now even more worried, I nonetheless lay my head back on his shoulder and hold him tighter. His breath is harsh and fast, but when I feel tears start falling against my skin I gently push against his chest. Joon keeps his head bent, his bangs failing to obscure the tears still running down his face. My heart, which had been so happy a few minutes ago, wrenches. I let my hand slide down his arm to curl around his. He follows as I go to the door and lock it before leading him to the far wall and sinking to the floor.

“It’s all right, oppa, it’s all right,” I croon, shifting so I can cradle his face against my chest and his hair. “I’m here.”

    Joon presses his face against my jacket and clings to me. Gradually, his tears stop and his breathing loses its raggedness. I almost think he’s fallen asleep, but I don’t try checking because I don’t want to disturb him.

Suddenly, he whispers, “I’m sorry.”

I make my hand continue playing with his hair. “For what?”

“F-for leaving without saying goodbye, for crying, for everything,” Joon sniffles, taking a deep breath and pulling away so our eyes are level.

“The first wasn’t your fault,” I reply softly, wiping some of the tears still on his face. “And you’re obviously upset about something. It’s all right to cry when you’re upset.”

“It’s not just ‘something,’ it’s a lot of things...I shouldn’t be complaining to you. I haven’t seen you in forever and you-”

I stop him with a finger to his lips. “I’ll be here for a while. Right now, you’re upset. Pretending that’s just suddenly gone away isn’t going to help. Just tell me.”

A small smile quirks his mouth. “Still bossy, huh?”

I shrug, waiting.

Joon sighs and moves so his back is against the wall, pulling up his knees to rest his elbows on. “There’s just been a lot going on. I keep doing show after show and MBLAQ’s activities and my drama and commercials and photo shoots...and I don’t get to breathe! They shove all these things at me and expect me to just do them, but I can’t! I want to do my best but I can’t focus because there’s too much and they don’t give me enough time!”

I keep quiet, knowing there’s probably more.

“And then there’s the ‘We Got Married’ thing. It wasn’t Yeonseo’s fault and we still got taken off. People’s feelings shouldn’t be messed around with like that. What am I? A robot who doesn’t feel or get tired?! I’m not!”

Jumping a little as Joon’s fist pounds the ground, I tentatively reach out to touch his shoulder. “You’re not, oppa. Of course you’re not.”

“Then why do they treat me like one?”

“I don’t know,” I reply, starting to his hair. “But you don’t deserve it.”

With a final clench of his fist, he sighs and lets his head drop to my shoulder. Crinkling his nose and sniffing, he looks up at me accusingly. “You changed perfume.”

“What?”

“You always used orange stuff before. Now you smell all...flowery. Girly.”

“I’ve always been a girl, pabo,” I retort, poking his forehead.

“I know that,” Joon pouts. “It’s just th-....Hang on, you’re speaking Korean.”

Frowning in confusion with his sudden topic change, I nod slowly.

“You’re speaking Korean?”

“Yes...I started taking classes after you left and in college. My roommate’s Korean American so she helps me keep it up too,” I explain, carefully watching his face.

“You speak really well; maybe even better than me!” Joon’s face suddenly bursts into a huge smile and he throws his arms around my neck again, almost strangling me. “And omo! Why am I being so stupid and crying when you’re actually here! I've wanted to talk to you so many times and I've just missed you so much!”

“Oppa...can’t...breathe...”

“Mianhae.” He quickly releases me, still grinning widely, but scooting closer so our thighs are touching. “Wow, look at you! You got so beautiful. What’re you doing these days? Are you still in university? Do you have a job? And what’re you doing here?”

Ducking my head to try to hide my blush, I decide to go with his change of moods. Although I feel there’s still some things Joon needs to get out, I’m not going to take away his sudden happiness. Chuckling, I ask “Um...where should I start?”

“Wherever you want.”

“All right...” I glance at him again, smiling to myself at his eager expression. “I graduated a few years ago and I’m doing journalist work for a travel magazine.”

“So you didn’t go into stunt work, just like Leo said,” Joon chuckles. “Do you decided not to do dance either?”

“I couldn’t do either one.”

“Why?”

“First year of college, I got in a car accident and my leg got broken in a few places. It-”

“What? Are you all right?” His eyes widening in concern, his hands immediately flutter up and down my leg as if it was still in its cast.

Trying to ignore the feeling of his hands through the thin fabric of my leggings, I chuckle again and catch his hands. “I’m fine; like I said, it was a few years ago.”

Joon grins sheepishly. “Oh, right.”

With a small smile, I reluctantly let go of his hands and continue, “It’s okay...Anyway, the doctors told me because of the places where the bone had broken, it would still be weak after it healed and wouldn’t be able to deal with a lot of physical stress. So, being a dancer or stuntwoman kinda flew out the window after that.”

“I’m sorry,” he says softly, taking my hand again. “It must’ve been hard, losing your dreams like that.”

I nod, pushing the old pain away with another smile. “I got over it and my job’s not too bad. I see you’ve achieved your dream though. With MBLAQ and acting. I’m...really proud of you.”

“Thank you, my Summer girl,” Joon says smiling back. “You know, I forgot how much I liked the nickname you gave me.”

“Sunny oppa?” I laugh, my heart ready to explode at that old nickname coming from his lips. Poking his dimple, I add. “It’s because you have such a nice smile. I kinda forgot I liked mine too.”


“Summer girl, because you always brightened my day. Glad to see that hasn’t changed either.”

I giggle and look at my lap because if I keep looking at him I might melt. “Leo’s here too by the way. He came to do some stunt teaching with a studio here and I tagged along...hoping I could see you again.”

“I'll have to see him too while he's here. I'm really happy you came too,” he beams, giving me a bear hug again. Not letting go this time, he asks, “How did you get in here though?”

“Cheondung and Mir helped me after they saw the note you’d given me,” I reply, unable to resist snuggling closer.

“I’ll have to remember to thank them.” Without warning, he pushes me away, keeping hold of my shoulders. “You said your leg was healed, right?”

“Yes.”

“And it’d be fine as long as you didn’t put a lot of stress on it, right?”


“Yes.”

“In that case...” Scrambling to his feet, Joon gracefully bows and holds out his hand, looking down at me with sparkling eyes. “Dance with me?”