Oh, it's raining...

He had been outside for about a half hour, and rain had been falling for the whole time, quite hard actually. But He had been too lost in thought to notice. People rushed by him on the street, holding umbrellas above their head, in a rush to get nowhere. Seong Joon continued walking in the rain, letting it drench him. Was he supposed to be going somewhere? Holding out his hand, Seong Joon looked up to the sky, letting the rain hit his skin. They were small cold wet bullets slowly carving into his body. It was denumbing. Time was still. All that were on the crowded street were Seong Joon and the rain, a miserable pair.

Why did She leave?

"Please understand," Seong Joon grabbed her arm, trying to keep her there. They had many fights, but this one was different. He tried desperately to get her to calm down. "That fan and her friends set up the picture. Why is that so hard to get?"

The printed out picture laid on the kitchen counter. It showed another girl attempting to kiss Seong Joon. From the angle it was taken though, it spilled a different story. Seong Joon had looked as if he was coming onto her. Only after the encounter had Seong Joon figured out what the girl had been trying to do, but her and her friend had disappeared.

"It's pretty damn convincing to me." She sneered, tapping impatiently on the photo. "I know you think you're a big shot, but that doesn't give you the right to play with girls."

Seething, She walked to the bedroom and put all her belongings into her backpack. Something told Seong Joon that this could really be the end.

"I'm not playing with you!" Seong Joon was almost in tears. His first love, the girl he dated for 2 years, was about to leave him over a staged picture. She had been the most important thing in his life since high school. "Why can't you see that its not true?! Why can't you believe me?"

She took a breath.

"This isn't the first time you've lied to me about something Seong Joon." She shook her head, speaking much calmer than she had been a minute ago. She looked determined, and Seong Joon knew she would set her head to whatever she truly wanted. "Honestly, I've thought about leaving you for a while now. You've been getting boring and can't satisfy me as much as when we were in high school. I guess this is just the line that cuts it. You obviously don't want me that bad either."

Seong Joon quickly brought her into a tight embrace, holding back sobs. She didn't even flinch. As rigid as a board. He rubbed her back and laid his head into the nape of her neck as he always did.

"Please don't leave. I'll do better. I'll try harder. Please, I need you."

"But i don't need you." She slipped out of Seong Joon's arms, picked up her bag, and left Seong Joon's apartment with those three words.

Looking up, Seong Joon found himself in front of his work building. He stood in the muggy summer rain and thought. Oh, right... Work. His heart was broken, but his mind still seemed intact or else he wouldn't have ended up here. Instead of walking through the front door, Seong Joon entered a slim alleyway on the right side of the building. He and his coworkers always went out to this alley to smoke and talk on breaks. It was a private place. People on the streets didn't care, and other coworkers never complained. It was a covered place as well so they never worried about the weather.

"Forget your umbrella or something?" Young Kwang, one of Seong Joon's friends was crouched on the sidewalk, putting out a cigarette or the slightly damp ground. As Seong Joon came closer though, he knew this wasn't the case. "What happened?" He asked urgently, standing up.

"She left." Seong Joon just sat down on the ground, reaching into his pocket for a soggy smoke and lighter.

Sighing, Young Kwang sat next to him. He watched his friend closely. He was worried about how he would react to this. She was his everything since the three of them had been in high school. They had a history that Seong Joon would not forget ever. They sat in silence as Seong Joon smoked. He exhaled and tried to form his thoughts.

"You know how I felt about her. The last thing she told me was that I couldn't satisfy her. I gave her everything, Young Kwang. I did everything I could to make her happy and comfortable. What did I do wrong?"

Seong Joon looked at his shoes. His mind was still spinning from the night before. It was as if his mind couldn't comprehend or he just didn't want to see the truth.

Young Kwang sighed and stood back up.

"Let's go in," He extended a hand to Seong Joon. "Work might get your mind off of it for a while."

"You're probably right." Throwing his cigarette to the side, Seong Joon took his hand and walked into the building.

I hope that you don't get as bad as you did before, Seong Joon. She isn't good enough for you. You gave her all you could. Please see that. Young Kwang followed him inside, shutting out the cold. Loss doesn't always have to be a bad thing.

~~~~~

Seong Joon sneezed. Why the hell did I walk in the rain? Shivering, he looked around his small room (he couldn't really call it an office) and found a change of clothes. Being a model, he usually had clothes strewn here and there. He stripped down to his boxers and put on a pair of black Capri slacks, black collared shirt, and white sweater. They were all small souvenirs from runways he had been on recently. It's not as if I'm in a drama or something. Seong Joon looked at himself in his full length mirror.

"Not bad for some random items." Muttering to himself, Seong Jun ran his fingers through his hair. One thing he was always confident in was his sense of fashion. He knew he wasn't the popular good looking face the girls would see in idols, but he was handsome, tall, and had a dark personality. Since he was young he always had girls trailing around him and his friends wanting to talk to them. They, of course, didn't find this as a blessing until the end of junior high, and then started dating them.

Since becoming a model in his senior year in high school, Seong Joon had always found his company a nice place to be. The people were nice, the facility was new, and they paid for all his travel. He didn't always have to go in, but he liked to help with the paperwork portion of the company, not just being a pretty face. Paperwork kept him busy and even relaxed him some days. The monotonous motions took his mind off his hectic life. When he started gaining popularity, Seong Joon was given the opportunity to begin acting. He had always thought about it, but hadn't seriously considered it until he was offered a role. By the time his acting work finished, he had more recognition and more fans than he thought, though he preferred his modeling job more. He was the quiet type who had a lot on his mind.

A knocking on his door unwillingly pulled Seong Joon out of his thoughts, blankly staring at the mirror.

"Come in." He looked at the door , not particularly curious as to who it was. He could tell by the knock.

"Well don't you look nice on this regular work day." Soo Joo joked, slipping through the barely opened door. Eyeing the pile of sopping wet clothes, she sighed and moved the hair out of her face.

Soo Joo was the kind of girl that could stop any man in his tracks with just one look, but she never once phased Seong Jun. With bleached white hair and sharp feature, she stood out in the crowd. She was a bigger model than him and was well known on runways in different countries. When she and friends were out, she usually ended up with a man in her bed that night just because she wanted a little fun. She could attract people that easily. Her personality was extremely mature, yet very childish, and she enjoyed toying with people.

"What do you need? I'm not in the mood to argue with you today."

"I just wanted to see if you wanted to have lunch with me. Jin Hee and Bae Young aren't here today, and the only other person I could think of to eat lunch with is you."

"You better not be playing around with me, Soo Joo." Seong Jun looked at her seriously.

"Why would I be playing around with you? I know something bad happened because you never walk in the rain without an umbrella. I might be childish, but I know when to stop." Soo Joo gave him one of her flattering smiles. "Besides, it's just lunch."

Seong Joon thought for a few seconds and ran his fingers through his hair once more.

"OK, where are we going?"

"There's a new cafe pretty close to here," Soo Joo brought a small umbrella out of the yellow canvas bag strung over her shoulder. "And don't worry. You won't get wet."

Smirking at Soo Joo's attempt to make him laugh, Seong Joon picked his wet wallet out of the pants on the floor and walked out the door. Soo Joo followed him out, turning out the lights and closing the door in a practiced movement. They silently walked down the tiled hallway. The two made a strange pair, both lanky and still awkward. It was if they were teenagers in the middle of a growth spurt, not knowing what to do with their elongated limbs. Apart, they stuck out like sore thumbs, and together it was even worse.

As they reached the entrance way, Soo Joo opened up her umbrella and stepped out into the rain. Seong Joon quickly joined her as to not get wet. He learned his lesson that morning. Still in silence, they walked down the sidewalk, occasionally turning around the block. Seong Joon looked out at the rain falling off of the umbrella in large drops, and thought of the night before. Soo Joo noticed him, reached into her bag, and grabbed a pack of cigarettes. She tapped him with the open box, and he gladly accepted one, lighting it and taking a few drags. He appreciated her at times. They walked a few more blocks before Soo Joo stopped in front of a small, homey looking cafe.

"Isn't it nice?" Soo Joo smiled. "It kind of reminds me of my childhood home."

Without saying anything, Seong Joon dropped his cigarette in a puddle and walked in.

The interior of the cafe was just as homey as the exterior. It was a small European styled place natural wood finishings, giving it a warm glow. There were only a few customers scattered at the various tables. Most sat in couples, probably boyfriends and girlfriends trying to get some time together before going back to work. An older couple sat by the window, sharing a pasta dish. A couple of employees were going back and forth from the kitchen, carrying dishes and orders. Calm jazz music played on the hidden speakers which set uncertain romantic mood on the room

Soo Joo came in behind her friend. "That's why I wanted to come here. It reminded me of childhood."

A waitress dressed in a white collared shirt and apron around her waist welcomed them and brought them to a table, right beside the older couple by the large windows overlooking the street. They sat and ordered drinks, red wine for Seong Joon and water for Soo Joo. Seong Joon watched the rain fall as the waitress went off to the back. People were just starting to get out of work for lunch and the sidewalks were crowded with blurs of people.

"Hey, Seong Joon," Soo Joo watched him intently as if studying every detail of his face. "What was your childhood like? When i meet a person, their personality shows their past, but I really can't tell with you. Ever since we met I've been curious."

Seong Joon stayed silent as the waitress came and gave them their drinks. He took a sip of his freshly poured wine and looked at the woman in front of him.

"In short, it was a living nightmare." Composing his thoughts, Seong Joon took a deep breath. "My father had drinking and gambling issues, and my mother was a very sickly woman. He would hit me and her around when he came home drunk. I have memories of this from when I was around five or six. My mother was diagnosed with a cancer when I was ten, leaving me to my father."

Seong Joon looked out the window again. He felt his hands shaking and quickly got hold of his thoughts, not letting himself fall into the nightmare he spoke of.

"My mother passed away when I was fourteen, leaving me only some money and some of her father and mother's things. By that time, I was going into high school and moved into a boy's dorm close to the school. My father was drunk most days, and got into some real trouble with some loan sharks. I haven't seen him since my first day of high school. In my senior year, I was recruited to do modeling, and here I am."

Soo Joo stared at the table for a minute while Seong Joon looked back out at the busy sidewalk, thinking on his story.

"That's why you're so mature huh?" She looked back at him. "Do you miss your mother?"

"Not especially anymore. When I was younger I'd get more upset than I do now. She's in a better place, at least, away from my father." Seong Joon took another sip of his wine. "Don't treat me any different, Soo Joo. Whenever people hear my story, they try to take care of me and comfort me. It happened a long time ago. No need to feel sorry."

"I wasn't planning on it." A soft smile appeared on Soo Joo's face.

Once again the waitress came to their table for their orders. Soo Joo ordered a small garden salad with raspberry vinaigrette and flat bread. Seong Joon ordered a plate of pasta Alfredo.

"So are you happy where you are now?"

Seong Joon looked at her and mustered a smile.

"I'm content. I have nothing to complain about. I have money, I have good looks, and I have everything I need to live from day to day."

"You know what I meant." Soo Joo smirked. She watched his vision go from the table to the floor and back to outside. "You like rain don't you? Whenever someone has an attraction to it, they can't stop looking at it. It's soothing."

"Do you?" Seong Joon asked. "You've gotta like something."

Thinking for a second, Soo Joo smiled. She tucked stray hair behind her ear.

"I like fish. They swim aimlessly, and their tails are beautiful. I could watch them for hours. When I was little, my family lived in a country town by the sea. I would always go out and look at the fish that lived under the dock. Whenever no one could find me, my grandma always knew to find me there, playing with the fish."

"Do you own any now?"

"I can't seem to keep them alive when I try to. I'd rather admire them from a distance than keep them and kill them." Soo Joo laughed a little to herself. "Funny how that works huh? You can keep it, but you can't keep it alive even if you try your best."

Seong Joon stared straight into her eyes.